


Alternative Joey

by Beecharmer



Category: Chalet School
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:42:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 35
Words: 132,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23865466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beecharmer/pseuds/Beecharmer
Summary: Written a long time ago and with many many typos and melodramatic moments. Written originally as small frequent updates, so may not flow as if properly written and edited. An Alternative Chalet School universe, where Jo doesn’t marry Jack, and instead has an adventurous life. Posted originally on Sally Denny Library and Chaletian Bulletin Board, and double posted as I try to finish it on Lime Green Musing.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

Joey Bettany sat on the fence, swinging her heels against the wood. It hadn't worked. Going to India to try to create some space between her and Jack Maynard had only put the problem off. 

It wasn't that she didn't like him. It was just that... She only liked him. He was solid, he was comforting. But he was a lump. He bored her, and he just felt like... well like a dependable older brother. 

A solid lump of comfort. A sensible, safe option. 

Joey knew Jem was quite keen on the match. It would keep her nearby, make Jack more likely to stay at the San. Joey wasn't sure what Madge's opinion was, but she had been keen on the trip to India, and she didn't seem to encourage Joey and Jack to be alone, as Jem did. 

Joey stuck her hands in the pockets of her dress and gave a deep sigh. The trip had awakened the writer's imagination in her, and with that a yearning to see the world, learn and write about lots of different types of people. She loved the Tirol but the circles she mixed in were so... limited. She still cared about the school, but had outgrown wanting to be there the whole time. The main times she ended up there now were when she needed an excuse to avoid the situation with Jack. 

Joey picked at the wood on the fence, lost in thought. If she married Jack she could see herself spending huge amounts of time at the school, but she wanted more out of life than being a doctor's wife, producing children and maybe allowed a study to write in, and to carry on writing. 

She wanted more than a solid lump of comfort. She wanted adventure.

Madge looked at her little sister, perched like a child on the fence, streaks of ink on her face. She wasn't a child anymore, and she wasn't happy. Jack wasn't right for her, nor was living at the Sonnalpe or the school anymore. 

She needed to explore, to experience life. For all that Madge wanted Joey to stay safe with them, she knew it wasn't right for the girl. The question was where to go. Joey still wasn't strong enough to live in the damp UK full time, and aside from that she became bored there very easily. 

Madge went towards Joey, who started, and made to jump off the fence, nearly tearing her dress as she did so. 

Madge stifled a smile. "Really Jo! You'll spend all your time mending if you're not careful." 

Joey smiled and said. "Well at least I don't have to mend anything this time." then looked at some ink marks on her cuffs. "I do seem likely to be having to do some washing though. Oh bother it. I always do get ink everywhere." 

Her sister agreed, then to Joey's suprise, Madge looked around and then swung herself up on the fence like a school girl. She laughed at Joey's face and motioned for her to join her.

"Don't look so shocked Joey-baba. I may have to be careful of what I do now that I am 'Frau Doktor Russell', but that doesn't mean that I forget what fun it is to sit on the fence and swing your heels once in a while."

Joey grinned and joined her sister. 

"Joey I want to talk to you" Madge began.

Joey jumped in, and straight to the wrong conclusion. 

"Oh Madge! You aren't 'busy' again are you? I overheard you say you might like more children soon."

This threw Madge off course rather. She denied being pregnant rather vehemently, and made a mental note to discuss some other terms than 'busy' with Jo before she continued with the original conversation. 

"Joey, we need to talk about something. You know you always have a home with us," she said. 

Joey nodded, wondering where this was leading. Madge went on.

"I don't want to pry into the situation with you and Jack..." 

The way Joey's body sagged and her shoulders dropped gave Madge all the answer she needed. She decided to be more abrupt than she had intended. 

"I don't think he's right for you." 

Joey was hugely surprised, having been expecting the opposite. A tiny part of her she called 'my devil' almost found Jack more attractive because of the disapproval. But the bigger part of her felt a huge sense of relief. She realised Madge was still talking. 

" ... but the way things are Joey, you're getting close to playing 'fast and loose' with him. He's a good man, he doesn't deserve that."

Joey looked shocked.

"But I wouldn't want to be like that Madge. Not at all. I do care for Jack, but ... Well that's all. I care but I don't ... well, er, love him" she said, looking anywhere but at Madge. It wasnt really natural to her to discuss this sort of thing with her sister. 

"Well then it's quite right that you don't marry him." said Madge. "But I don't think Jack is the only problem, is he?"

Joey stayed silent. She wasn't sure what to say, how to explain without sounding ungrateful for the loving home she had. 

Madge gave her some time then started the discussion herself. 

"I think you need a new challenge Jo. So what do you think you want to do? Go to university, to somewhere like the Sorbonne with Simone, or to Oxford?" 

Jo responded immediately. "Oh no, not the Sorbonne with Simone! If we were there together alone she wouldn't be able to help going all soppy over me again. She would be jealous of my friends and ... Oh it just wouldn't work. I don't think I want to study any more either really, I enjoy my freedom to write too much to settle down to something like that"

Madge considered for a moment. 

"Well what about your original plan, to go to Elisaveta's court as lady in waiting?" she said. She was fairly sure she knew the answer but interested to see what Joey would say. 

"Vita doesn't need me, and I would go mad having to be prim and proper all day. No, I ... Oh it just sounds silly Madge, but I want to explore, watch how people react, meet new people. Does that make sense?"

Madge nodded. 

"It makes a lot of sense Joey. You spent so much of your childhood travelling, we've always been a family who like to go to new places and see new things. The real decision now is where and how. Have you any idea where you want to go? " 

Joey had many ideas, not all of them practical. They discussed things a little more and then set off to the house, with Joey's future still unresolved.

\---

Madge knocked on the door of Jem's study and entered. Her husband looked up from his paperwork with a smile. 

"Hello, is it lunch time already?" he said, grabbing hold of Madge's hand and standing to pull her towards him. 

Madge laughed and put her arms around his waist. 

"No, it's only 11, but I wanted to talk to you about something."

Jem listened quietly while she explained. He was slightly disappointed, as he liked Jack Maynard a lot. Since Jo had to grow up, he wanted her protected and looked after. But he also knew that Madge understood her little sister very well, so if she said there was no hope of her and Jack becoming an item, then he would accept it. 

"This may well be a good thing, Madge," he replied as she drew to an end. "I'm worried about the situation in Austria, and so it seems are Flower and Lannis. Flower has decided to return to America for a while and he is to escort Evadane, as well as his own Cornelia. I can ask him to take Jo with them. Then she will be safely away if we need to move from here quickly." 

"Jem! Do you really think that will be necessary?" said Madge in concern, forgetting about Jo's exploring for a moment "Do you think I should close the school?" 

"Not close it, at least not right now" he said "But if things don't improve then I'm thinking we may need to move it to the Sonnalpe, so we at the San can keep you all under our protection. Not quite yet; there's no point in inviting trouble. But we need to be prepared in case it becomes necessary"

They left the topic of Jack and Joey, and focussed on the logistics of how they might move the school if the situation didn't approve. 

\---

Jack Maynard wandered along the mountain path, lost in thought. He was still trying to work out how he felt about his recent conversation with Joey. 

"I want you to stop thinking there is a chance for us, Jack. I really do care for you, but ... like an older brother" she said, each word digging deeper into him. "It wouldn't be right for either of us. You deserve someone who will love you properly."

He had cut short the discussion, not able to trust his reactions. He was tempted to try to change her mind, but he still had his pride. Also, if he was honest, he knew deep down that she was right. 

He'd already found himself burying himself in work to cope with her lack of response to his courtship. Did he really want a lifetime of hiding at work to avoid the realisation that the relationship was all one sided? 

No he didn't. He would see Joey off on her travels and wish her well.

In some ways, finally making that break made him feel lighter, almost happier. He had wanted Joey for so long. Now he realised it was an idealised Joey he wanted, not this flesh and blood woman who didn't love him back. He had wanted to be part of the happy family at Die Rosen so much that he had set Joey on a pedestal that she was determined to jump off. 

It would take time, but he would heal, and in some ways he would be glad not to have to be second best to her writing.


	2. Chapter 2

A few weeks later, Joey found herself on a boat heading to New York. Mr Flower was accompanying her to America, and a relative of his was to provide a place to stay for a few months while she decided where to go next. She was looking forward to settling down to writing and exploring her new surroundings. 

It had been sad saying goodbye to everyone, especially the little ones. It would be at least a year before she was back, maybe longer. But now that she was really on her way, it was exciting. Her life up until now had been controlled by her health, then school, and to have such freedom was a real change. 

Mr Flower smiled to see her excitement. Next to him his daughter Cornelia and her friend Evadane were also finding Joey's wonder amusing, but in a different way. 

"She looks like she plans on watching the sea for the whole journey" whispered Evvy. Corney smiled. 

"Whats the betting we will have 'Patrol Leader Nancy At Sea' to look forward to having to read next?" she muttered back. 

Jo stayed there for a long time staring at the waves, but finally her natural curiosity took over. She took to exploring the boat and getting to know the passengers.

Mr Flower watched her being her normal friendly self and wished that she could always stay that way. But she needed to be more careful once she got to New York. Not everyone would be friendly. Nor would everyone take her curiosity at face value, so he had to warn her to be a bit more careful. But for now he enjoyed seeing the way the innocent girl made friends with everyone. There was plenty of time for her to get a bit tougher, let her play now.

One afternoon Joey, Corney and Evvy were sitting on some deckchairs watching the sunset. Corney was feeling quite bored and asked Joey to sing. Looking around to make sure that they wouldn't be disturbing anyone, Joey obliged. Her clear pure voice filled the air, a perfect soundtrack to the beautiful sea reflecting the sun's last rays. 

Around a corner, a man was sitting at a table, surrounded by boards with colourful images and piles of film scripts. He raised his head to listen. 

He said to his brother, "Roy, listen to that. Now if only we had had a voice like that for the film. Its too late now, but if I knew we were going to be able to continue, I would hire that person on the spot. "

He got up a carefully looked around the corner, not wanting to disturb the little group and stop the singing. 

He came back shaking his head. 

"She even looks right for the part. Dark hair, pale skin, slightly fragile look. The publicity would have been amazing."

Roy tried to bring his brother back to the task at hand. "Well it's too late for this part, and we can't offer her a future film, we've sunk too much into this one. If the bankers pull out now we won't have a studio left. We have to get back to making the final decisions about how we move forward."

His brother agreed reluctantly. He did, however, go out of his way later to compliment the girls on their singing and give Joey his card. He told her to contact him if she was interested in voice work or singing for animation or motion pictures. He was quite gracious and interested when Joey explained she was in fact already a published writer. She tried to return his card, but he made her keep it, saying it was 'always worth knowing someone' if she changed her plans.

Corney and Evvy had been quiet as mice during the exchange, then pounced on Joey as soon as he had gone. 

"Jo you idiot, don't you know who that is, what he could do for you?" said Evvy, looking after the man with the small moustache in awe. 

"No I don't, nor am I going to find out. I'm quite happy as a writer, and I have no plans to visit..." she squinted at the card in the half light "California, or anywhere near. I was just being polite. Now clear up the rugs, we must head inside or we will be late for dinner. "

So saying, she put the card in a pocket of her dress and promptly forgot about it. 

Further along the deck another man, who had also been attracted to the singing, noticed this exchange and decided to take a different approach. He collected together some loose sheets of paper, including some musical scores. 

He came up towards the girls and dropped his notebook and papers. They of course came to help collect the sheets He thanked them and then went on his way.

When the group reached the dining room to join Mr Flower, the man with the music went up to them and introduced himself, requesting their presence at his table in thanks for their earlier help. Mr Flower saw no reason to refuse, and they were soon all seated and enjoying the meal. He didn't mention anything about Joey's singing, he simply concentrated on finding out everything he could about the group, while giving little away. 

Joey took this at face value, but Cornelia watched the situation with a frown. 

" There's something I don't like about that guy," she said later to Evvy. " He just seems a ..a ...lowdown fourflusher to me." 

Evvy hadn't noticed anything out of the ordinary, but she herself became a little suspicious when he appeared after that on several occasions and was particularly attentive to Joey. 

Corney finally decided she wasn't happy about all of this, and the time was coming closer for when they would be leaving Joey almost alone in New York. With a slightly nervous feeling, she went to her father's cabin, to request an interview with him. 

She rapped on the door with her knuckles and stepped back. Mr Flower opened the door and looked at Corney in surprise. 

" What's wrong, is someone ill?" He said as he let her in. 

"No Pop, I just want to talk to you about something" she said, sitting down and looking at him earnestly. He listened as she explained her worries, suggesting that perhaps they should keep Joey with them. Mr Flower frowned and thought for a moment. 

"You're right, Corney, I don't like the persistence of that guy myself. But we can't just take Joey with us, she needs this change of scene. I wish we could stay in New York a while ourselves, but I really can't stay longer than it will take to introduce her to your Aunt Laura. "

As Corney started to suggest that she and Evvy could stay, he laughed. "No my girl, I'm sorry but we have to keep you going on with your education. I wouldn't be at all surprised if they end up moving the Chalet School somewhere safer; Russell was certainly talking about it. So as soon as that happens you will be going back. I don't want them to find that all you have learnt in the meantime are some New York expressions to add to your fine collection of slang. And Lannis wants his daughter back with him, he was very clear about that. "

Corney grinned, glad to hear that she might be going back to the Chalet. She had to accept things as they were, but she was no less worried about Joey. Her Aunt Laura was lovely, but since her husband had died she was addicted to the Broadway shows, and it seemed to Corney that on occasion she could be even more naive than Joey. 

"I've been thinking that I need to have a talk to Jo, and your worries have confirmed it. I think that's all we can do at the moment, but I will talk to Laura about watching out for this man. What was his name again?" 

Corney replied. "Stanley Arnold. Do you know what he does Pop? He's slippery and never quite lets it out."

Mr Flower frowned. 

" No, I'll do some checking when we get home. I'll try to suggest to Joey to be wary, but after all, we only have a feeling that he's up to something. He could just be bored and lonely on the journey. I agree that something doesn't feel right about him, though. Good girl for coming to me about it."

Corney left, feeling that at least her father was aware, and something was being done about Joey being so innocent, but not really feeling much less uneasy. 

Meanwhile Stanley Arnold was making the most of Corney's absence to talk to Joey alone, Evvy having already gone to bed. Jo, being her normal open self, quite happily gave him her address in New York, thinking that it would be nice to start the time in America knowing at least one person. As he saw Corney returning he excused himself and said goodnight. He had what he needed, no need to raise anyone's suspicions any further. 

For the rest of the trip he was polite but not pushy, and Mr Flower began to think it was perhaps just them being over protective of Joey, and relax a little about the situation. 

Corney wasn't convinced.

\---

Joey looked around her new domain in delight. It wasn't a large room, but it had an amazing view across Manhattan. 

Corney's aunt had turned out to be kind but also very busy. She had shown Joey where to find everything, and then busied off on her own life. Mr Flower had spoken to Joey and tried to warn her to be cautious of people. She had listened politely but thought that it was just him forgetting she was an adult and capable of making her own decisions. She hadn't heard anything from Mr Arnold in the past week anyway. 

Joey went over to the window and looked out. She had never lived up as high as this, and it was strange to see the buildings towering up even higher above the one she was in. 

She put her hat on and prepared to go and explore her surroundings. The flat was near the theatre district, since her hostess spent nearly every bit of time that she could at plays and shows. So Joey left the flat and soon began to walk along the road called Broadway. 

The noise and bustling of the city streets was a little wearing to her, after the initial wonder had worn off. She contemplated changing direction and heading up towards Central Park, although she had been warned that she ought not go in there alone, the green attracted her far more than the buildings and bustle did. 

She looked at the theatre marquees as she went. Of Mice and Men was an interesting title. The Mikado had had very good reviews as well according to her hostess. She wandered along randomly reading posters, when a movie theatre marquee caught her eye. 

"Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, by Disney" 

Now why was that name familiar? She thought for a moment, then remembered the gentleman on the boat who had given her his card. Well, this must be one of his films. She went closer to have a look. Oh, it was an animation. Joey had not really seen many animations, since there were only a few cinemas in the Tyrol near enough to visit. She had an expectation of a crudely drawn caricature short so she was amazed when she saw the colours and detail on the poster. 

Curious as to the film, since she had met its producer, she paid and went into the movie theatre.   
When she came out she was still amazed. Very few people had thought it possible for a full length film to be made in animation. Joey herself had had a vague feeling that the Disney brothers films were something to do with mice, so hadn't really expected that much from the movie. But she had loved every minute, and cried along with many others in the theatre towards the end, cheering as things eventually turned out for the best. 

Whistling the Hi Ho Hi Ho song from the film, Joey wandered off along the road. She looked at some of the streets off the main road, wondering whether to explore along them. 

Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned to see a policeman looking fiercely at her. 

"Be off with you gal, you can't ply your trade here. Get down to the docks" he said. 

"I beg your pardon?" said Joey, completely confused. "What do you mean"

"Oh you want to get cheeky about it, do ya?" he said, and started to get his notebook out. "Name?" 

Jo just stared at him. This man clearly thought she was doing something wrong. As he spoke to her some more she realised in horror that he thought she was some kind of street walker or prostitute. But why? Was it something she was wearing ? Or something she had done without realising? 

Just as she was beginning to panic, a man in a trilby stopped by the pair. 

" Excuse me officer, can I help? I know this young lady, and I'm sure she can't be guilty of anything."

The officer put his notebook down. "Mr Arnold, Sir." he said, respectfully. " Well if you will take charge of the girl, we'll say no more about it."

Stanley Arnold nodded, and then offered to escort a rather shaken Jo to her lodgings. 

"New York is a very different city to those in Europe ma'am," he said "If it wouldn't be too forward of me, I could perhaps show you around ?" 

Jo agreed, and they parted at the door to the apartment building. 

Further down the street, Officer Archie Goon was happily thinking about the money in his pocket, given to him just before he accosted Joey. 'Always generous that Mr Arnold', he thought to himself. 'I'll be seeing that girl on his arm soon I'd bet. Always works, the gallant rescuer scam'.

However, he would have been surprised to know that Stanley Arnold had underestimated Joey Bettany. For all that the incident had given her a scare, the one thing about Joey was that you couldn't keep her down for long. 

She asked Corney's aunt about the policeman, but she didn't know anything that made sense of the accusations. Joey put it behind her and concentrated on her new life. She busied herself around the apartment for the rest of the day, as a few story ideas were bubbling away in her brain, and she wanted to be able to write them down as soon as they came to the boil. She almost regretted agreeing to meet Mr Arnold, for she had wanted to explore alone. However, she did see the sense in perhaps having someone to show her around to begin with.

The following day she met Mr Arnold as arranged. To his surprise, she didn't want to be shown around the clothes shops, or taken to a hotel for lunch. She wanted to see the buildings and walk the streets, see the people and get to know the city. 

Eventually he gave in, and to his surprise, found himself seeing New York with a stranger's eye, and liking what he saw. 

Finally they ended up on Broadway again. As they walked along, people in the street said hello to Stanley, and Joey became curious as to why he was so well known. 

He was so used to doing things by stealth, that he surprised himself when her answered her honestly. 

"I'm a talent scout. These people are actors and actresses I've placed in performances all along Broadway." 

He was finding himself confused about how he felt, a very new experience for him. This girl seemed so different from the Europeans that he usually conned into taking parts for far less than they should be paid, or the girls he tricked into working seedy nightclubs. For the first time in a long time he decided to take a direct route. He told her he had heard her sing, and thought that she could be a star. He finished, and waited for the excitement that he was sure would follow. 

She was interested, but dismissed with a laugh any suggestion that she might sing in public. She was sure that Madge and Jem would not approve, and said as much. 

He realised with a jolt, she really was uninterested, and even stranger, was completely unaware how good she was. She had no idea. He was torn between wanting to keep her unconscious of that, and wanting her to use her talent. 

They reached the end of their time together, and he realised that he was nowhere near getting Joey to play the role he had in mind for her. He tried again, gave her all of his charm. But for once, Stanley Arnold had met his match. Joey was polite, but firm. She was a writer and singing was for recreation only. 

They parted at the apartment door again, and Stanley wandered back along Broadway. He hadn't managed what he had wanted. But, he realised, he had had a great day. A really great day. She was really something, this Joey Bettany. Really something.


	3. Chapter 3

Joey was suddenly hit with several story ideas, one after the other. She barely left her room, and all that could be heard for several weeks was the sound of her typewriter and rustle of pen and paper.

Finally, Corney's aunt intervened. She had been warned of this possibility by Mr Flower, and she knew that the girl needed some fresh air after being shut in the flat for so long. 

So she made Joey come with her to an outdoor performance of King Lear in Central Park. Unfortunately, at the very point of the beginning of the storm scene the heavens opened, and nearly all of the audience left. Joey and Corney's aunt tried to stay, but the weather just got too much even for them. They had to abandon the players, who were bravely continuing through the downpour as long as they had any audience left. 

It had been good for Joey to get out, and the rush home from the rainstorm had given her a bit of exercise, which helped her wake up even more. 

She woke up early the following day in an exploring mood. She decided to go for a walk and see where the morning took her. She wandered along, looking at the shop windows, enjoying the city while it was so peaceful and quiet. 

As she passed the Tiffanies jewellery store, she saw a young woman, still in evening wear, and wearing large sunglasses, looking in the window, and eating a croissant. 

That made Joey hungry, so she started looking out for a good place to have breakfast. Finally choosing a cafe in an archway near Grand central station, revelling in freedom and enjoying trying the unfamiliar foods on offer. She watched the world go by as she ate, and drank her milky coffee. New York was beginning to wake up, and she enjoyed seeing the huge range of people that passed along the street in front of her. 

Later in the day she wandered her way back, again looking at all of the marquees for the shows on Broadway. The suggestion that she could be a professional musical performer still seemed ludicrous to her, but Stanley's words had at least made her curious as to the content of some of these plays. Perhaps she would get some ideas from these performances? It was worth a try. 

Corney's aunt needed very little persuading to go to shows, and they began an enjoyable session of going from show to show, the imaginative and musical Joey enjoying the talent and variety more with every trip. 

Even so, she was very dismissive when Corney's aunt suggested a Jazz performace. 

"Jazz, oh no, it's awful stuff." she said firmly. However finally she was persuaded, and was hit at once by the huge difference between Jazz played by hotel bands and on the wireless, compared to these musicians and the mix of blues, jazz and swing that were gradually starting to form into a new type of music. 

She had to stifle an initial smile at the image of Corney and her saxophone that the sight of the alto and tenor saxes brought to mind. But as the performers 'jammed' their way through music old and new, she was hooked. 'Summertime' was a particular favourite, and she loved the innovation as many different versions were played and reworked in front of her. 

She was mesmerised by the resonant sounds of the baritone saxophone, even while she slightly wondered how the little man holding it could move the way he did while playing. 

Having broken down some of her prejudices against Jazz, she began to explore more of the smaller venues. One of the theatres had a tribute performance of " Girl Crazy" as the composer Gershwin had recently died. 

She came out with the catchy 'I've got Rhythm, I've got music' stuck in her head, and the mix of instruments bouncing around her mind almost the way a story did. She still didn't want to be a professional performer, but the idea of maybe getting involved in some performing or musical theatre as a hobby started to grow on her. 

Stanley Arnold had remained attentive, although Joey had no idea that he was falling for her. She resolved to ask him about amateur groups next time that she saw him.

\---

Dearest Madge, 

I can't quite believe it is so many months ago that I arrived here. It wasn't until you mentioned Easter in your last letter that it really came home to me how long I have been gone. 

It did bring on a wave of homesickness, I do miss you and the babes so much. I am keeping busy, however, so no time to fret. 

Patrol Leader Nancy at Sea is finished and has been sent to my publishers. I am having a break now before starting the next one, to help me decide where to visit next. I am beginning to find New York a little tiring now. 

I will write more when I have some fixed plans. Corney's aunt has made it clear that I am welcome here any time, and I am enjoying our local drama group, so I will probably not stray far to begin with. 

All love to everyone, kiss the babes for me,

Joey

Joey looked at her letter. It wasn't in her nature to lie to anyone, especially not to Madge. She had tried to keep as much to the truth as she could. That would have to do. She got herself ready and went out to meet Stanley. There was a lot going on, and she wasn't quite sure what her family would feel about it all. 

\----

Madge read the letter and put it aside to show Jem when he got home. He was at the San, as several new patients had arrived. She was concerned that he wasn't getting enough sleep. He was very worried about the changes in Austria and the increasing visibility of the swastika in the area. 

She and Jem had decided to move the school up to the Sonnalpe to be nearer to the San during the previous half term, and they were just about getting back to being organised now, several weeks after the move. With Mademoiselle still very ill, they were all feeling a shadow over the upcoming Easter holidays. 

Madge went back to her paperwork with a slight frown. Rosalie Dene, Jem's secretary, paused on her way past the open door. 

"Can I help at all?" she asked "I've nearly finished for today, I could come in and help with the school paperwork if you like?" 

Madge smiled at the young woman. "No Rosalie, you aren't expected to work all the time. You've had a full day of it today, with all of the new forms for the San. Why don't you go for a walk, or go and sit in the garden?" 

Rosalie protested slightly, she was so much a part of the family that she really didn't mind working extra hours. But Madge was firm, and sent her off for a rest. 

Jack Maynard ambled along, knowing that he was early, and not wanting to seem too eager. He had been invited to eat at Die Rosen, something that occurred a few times a week. He was glad for the company, since it had been lonely since his sister Mollie had married and moved away. He enjoyed having company of adults who weren't also his patients. 

He was trying not to think about the other reason he was so keen to visit. The other person that he felt so safe being around. He tried not to be too obvious looking at them, but it was hard not to notice their every move. 

He quickened his step a little. After all, if he was early, he could help out, it wasn't like he was a stranger. They had all become close due to the stressful situation in the area. 

They might be there, and he could be helpful, or just be sympathetic at the workload that the new patients brought upon them all. 

He didn't have to dawdle, he could get there early. It wouldn't seem too strange. Would it? 

\---


	4. Chapter 4

Joey left the apartment, and headed along towards the theatre district. Halfway along, she looked around her to make sure that there wasn't anyone she knew in sight. She then swiftly turned and hurried off down a narrow alleyway, knocked on a door halfway down, and was let in at once. 

Across the street, Corney Flower watched this performance with a slight frown on her face. She had been heading along to the apartment to surprise Joey. Mr Flower had unexpected business to do in New York, and Corney had begged to be allowed to come along too. 

So when she had seen Joey, Corney had been all ready to hail her friend, before some instinct stopped her, as she saw her the unusual way Joey was behaving. She was looking around her as she walked and then suddenly shot off into the alleyway so fast that her friend had almost lost sight of her. 

Corney crossed the street and looked down the alley. The door that Joey had gone into was unmarked, and showed no clue as to it's occupant. She considered for a moment. It might not have been Joey. She had only caught a glance of her really. Did she really want to knock on a strange door in the middle of New York? People didn't take well to nosiness here, and who knew what or who was behind the door. It would be far more sensible to just mind her own business and carry on to the apartment. If it wasn't Joey that she had seen, they could laugh at the situation together. If it was Joey ... well, she had certainly been acting suspiciously, she wasn't likely to be happy about Corney following her. 

The sensible thing to do would be to just turn around and leave. Ignore her instinct that it HAD been Joey there. Keep to her original plan, and head along to her Aunt's apartment and hope that Joey would tell her what was going on later 

That would be the sensible plan. 

Corney rapped on the door. It opened to show a man in a suit, and a long dim corridor behind him. He stood watching her in silence, no greeting or question. 

Corney, normally never lost for words, wasn't at all sure what to say. Eventually she decided the direct approach was best, and simply asked. 

" Is Josepine Bettany here?" 

The bouncer looked at her, then just shook his head, and began to close the door. As he did so, Corney saw Jo go across the end of the corridor. 

"Joey! " she cried "Joey! Tell this guy you know me!" 

Joey froze, and turned slowly towards her. The bouncer grunted, and said "Jo Wilson ya mean do ya. Come in then, she don't have long before the show. "

Corney passed him, every bit of information giving her two more questions. Joey stared at her, seeming to be unable to start the conversation. They stood in awkward silence for a moment, during which time Corney realised that Jo had only a dressing gown on, with little or nothing below it. 

The younger girl suddenly realised that there could be more going on than she had considered, and she blushed, unable to work out where to look, or what to say. 

Joey looked puzzled and obviously came to some decision. She looked at the clock on the wall, then motioned Corney into a nearby room. She shut the door and turned to face her friend. 

Corney wasn't sure what to think, or how to answer. What on earth was going on?

"I ... Er ... I saw you ..." she stammered, feeling almost embarrassed and guilty. Then she came to her senses. It was Joey who had questions to answer. "What are you doing here ? And... Why ... You ... Why are you only wearing a dressing gown?"

Joey looked down at her dressing gown, then looked at Corney. 

"I was undressing when I remembered I needed more make up. Oh help! I didn't get it, and look at the time!! Be back in a minute. " she said, making Corney even more worried and confused. 

Joey Bettany? Make up? What on EARTH was going on? Corney sat in the little dressing room and looked around. The costumes didn't make her feel any better. They were a real mix, but several seemed likely to be very revealing. Others looked, well, unidentifiable but far from respectable. 

Corney was very worried. 

\---

Back at Die Rosen, Jack entered the garden, and stopped to look at the scene. Madge was sitting with the children, hearing all about their latest games, holding back a smile as a very serious David explained something about Sybil's teddy bear. 

Jem was sitting back in a chair, his hands behind his head, still clearly preoccupied with his patients. The sun glinted through his hair, which was standing slightly on end due to him running his fingers through it.

Rosalie was sitting beside him, eyes closed, head tipped back to catch the last of the sun's warmth and light. 

Jack paused at the gate, suddenly unsure about joining them, sent back to being a schoolboy by nerves and his crush. 

He contemplated slipping back out and waiting until dinner time, but just at that moment Peggy caught sight of him, and came running across the garden, singing out "Uncle Jack! Hello Uncle Jack!" 

He allowed the excited girl to grab his hand and pull him into the group. He had spent so much time at Die Rosen trying to court Joey, that the little ones considered him their property, and were quick to demand fuss and piggyback rides. 

Jem looked up and greeted him with a friendly nod, as Rosalie and Madge smiled their hellos. 

Jack gave in and joined in the family-like scene. The children were eventually tired enough with their new visitor to let him sit down. Jem immediately started a conversation about the new patients with him. Madge rolled her eyes, and Rosalie allowed herself a small smile, still a little mindful of the fact that Jem was her employer, so ought to be respected. 

Being so close made Jack distracted and tongue tied. Finally the familiarity of subject allowed him to get a hold on himself.

Later, after an enjoyable meal and relaxed evening, Jack wandered home, deep in thought. He thought back to his visits to Jo, and the caring way he had felt about her. There had never been these jolts and feelings of being unable to control his eyes, needing to see the favourite face as much as possible. He hadn't realised until now how love really felt, and he finally understood his reasons for wanting Jo were more about wanting to be part of this family. He would never have hurt her, but he realised now that they were meant to be friends, no more. 

Madge had read them all some of Jo's recent letters, and she seemed to be doing well. He was glad that she had made her decision to go off and explore. Her letters sounded full of excitement, and he was happy to know that she was safe, and seemed to be getting some writing done. 

Jack wandered happily along, and let his mind drift to a possible future, to whether he dared to say anything, and the worry about whether there was even the faintest chance that his new love felt the same way.

\---

Corney sat and waited for Joey’s return, her imagination going into overdrive. Finally, Joey arrived back, clutching a collection of make up materials, and sat down at the mirror to make up her face. This was too much for Corney, she had to know what was going on. Vague plans for physically making Joey leave this place if she wouldn’t listen to reason began to form in the younger girl's mind, sure from the surroundings that Joey was being taken advantage of, or led astray.

“Joey.” she said “ What on earth is going on? You are here in this ... place, half dressed and worrying about make up - you of all people - worrying about make up. Are you in some kind of trouble?”

Joey swivelled in her chair and looked at her with a puzzled expression. Then her eyes shifted onto the costumes behind Corney, and her face cleared. 

“Oh Corney !” she exclaimed. “You must have thought this such a strange place! These costumes are left over a previous play, a most bizarre one it must have been as well, judging by those ones with the studs on!” 

Corney began to breath a little easier. At least Joey was acknowledging that the surroundings were a little unusual. 

There wasn’t much time for more explanation however, as a bell ringing galvinised Joey into action, and she threw on a dress and left in a hurry, motioning to Corney to follow her. 

\---

Back in Austria, the San was quiet, patients resting and doctors catching up on paperwork between rounds. Jack had a rare moment to think, and was leaning back in his chair, tilting like any school child. He was looking thoughtfully out of the window, when a noise behind him attracted his attention. 

As he turned his head, he saw Jem’s secretary, Rosalie Dene, standing in the doorway. In surprise, he involuntarily pushed against the desk with his foot, and tipped himself backwards in the chair. 

Roaslie rushed forward to help him up, and he inwardly cursed his reaction and undignified descent to the floor. He was a little sharp with her, in his embarrassment, but she knew him well enough to see through that, and simply smiled and inquired after his head, which had caught the floor with a bump as he fell. 

“I'll survive” he said ruefully, then caught his breath as she made him bend his head down and checked for any cuts or damage.

“You'll live” she said at last, with a smile. “How do you feel?”

“Oh fine thank you,” replied Jack, inwardly wishing that he could think of some witty or clever thing to say, but having no idea where to start. Again a little more abruptly than he intended, he inquired as to her reason for visiting him - was he needed?

“No, I was just wondering if you had any paperwork that needed doing ?” she said. “We're finally caught up with the new patient details, and Jem has no need of any help at the moment. I was feeling at a loose end, so thought that I would see you, I mean see whether you, or um, any of the other doctors, needed any help”

Jack tried not to focus on the fact that she had said “You” first, after all he was only one of the many doctors there, and she was probably just being conscientious about her work.

“No thank you,” he said, frantically trying to think of anything that he could suggest for her to do, to keep her there. However his clear desk and obvious lack of activity when she had entered would show the truth if he even attempted to create work. 

As she turned to go, he was struck by the feeling that she might, just might have been coming along for company, not for extra work.

“I, we...do you...” he began, then started again. 

“Would you like to go for a walk?” he finally managed to get out, and was rewarded with a warm smile. He returned it, and they arranged to meet outside in a few minutes. 

Jack popped his head around Jem’s door, and said that he was off for some fresh air, but would be back before his next rounds. Jem smiled to himself at the affected casualness, but simply nodded and said that there was no hurry, there were plenty of staff in at the moment. 

Ten minutes later Jem saw the two figures wandering along the pathway, deep in conversation. He would have something to report back to Madge at last, he thought to himself with a grin. It had been an inspired idea to tell Rosalie to go to see whether Jack needed any help, the two of them had been dancing around each other for months now. 

Outside, Jack and Rosalie continued walking, until finally they had to reluctantly return to the San. 

As she left him at the door of his office, Rosalie seemed to make a decision, turned back, and blushed as she asked him if he would like to join them for a meal that evening. Jack nodded, and she smiled. Although he frequently went to the Russell home for meals, it was always at Jem or Madge’s invitation. Jack smiled to himself happily as he went to wash ready for his rounds. This had been a good day, he felt, and he was looking forward to a nice evening.

\---

Corney followed Joey, until they reached some steps going up towards a stage. Joey looked round her, then her face cleared as she saw someone she knew. 

"John!" she called, and a cheerful looking man turned around and headed towards them. 

"My friend here has just arrived this minute, could you find her somewhere to wait and watch?" Joey gabbled, then grabbed the younger girl's hand. " Corney, I will explain, I just have to go now. But please - wait if you can, we can catch up properly after the show. 

In a whirl, Corney found herself in the theatre auditorium, settling in just as the lights dimmed for the performance. It was a very strange feeling, getting ready to watch a show with no idea at all what it was about. She began to relax a little as she looked at the theatre goers around her. They seemed normal, well presented people, and a mix of sexes. The deep fear that Joey was part of some seedy men's club show began to fade. 

As she watched, she was thrilled by what she saw. Joey's role was not the title one, but it might as well have been. She stole the show, her voice filling the space and drawing the audience into the character's life story. 

To Corney's amazement, she also discovered that her friend could ACT. Corney and Joey had often taken the main singing roles in school productions, so she had rarely seen Joey perform when not trying to remember her own lines, or change to her next costume. But here, she could see the character first, and then below that, if she concentrated, she knew her friend was there. 

It was a simple story, well done, and Corney could see from the reactions around her that it was well received. When the final curtain fell, she was certainly not the only one rising to her feet as she applauded. 

Her brain still half within the story of the show, Corney hovered around the door she had been brought through, unsure where to go next. As the auditorium emptied, she was relieved when John returned and motioned to her to follow him. 

Backstage Joey was still coming down from the high of performing. All too soon tgis time however, reality had begun to set in, and she remembered Corney's presence. Her secret was out. She had been quite enjoying the anonymity of being 'Jo Wilson, new unknown singer/actress'. 

She knew that Madge and Jem would be unlikely to consider this a suitable occupation for her, and was petrified of being put in a situation where she had to chose between their approval and the addiction that the performing had become. She had to make Corney see why it needed to be a secret. 

Once Joey had washed and changed, they left the theatre and wandered over to a nearby restaurant. Joey could rarely eat before a performance, and she was well overdue a meal. They didn't say much until after eating, then Corney started, hesitantly. She was feeling strangely shy of this new confident city dweller Joey. 

"That was amazing Jo," she said. "How long has this been going on?" 

Jo blushed slightly at the praise, and focused on the question instead. 

"A few months really" she replied. " I was going to just do some amateur dramatics, but Stanley - that's Stanley Arnold, the man we met on the boat, do you remember? Well he encouraged me to try for this and... Well they accepted me!" 

Corney had frowned at the sound of Stanley Arnold's name, but decided to wait and find out a bit more before passing judgement. Her father's enquiries had shown Stanley to be a minor player on the theatre scene, with a bit of a reputation for taking advantage of newcomers, but nothing hugely serious. And Joey certainly seemed happy. 

They chattered for a while, then Joey came round to the thing that was worrying her. 

"I ... I haven't told anyone about this, Corney" she said, looking her friend in the eye. " I just wanted to try being free of everyone's expectations for once, have a bit of fun."

Corney gazed at her thoughtfully. She knew that Joey's sister would worry if she knew what Joey was doing. Perhaps she would be right to do so. But Corney was seeing Joey in a new light. Here was an adult, not a young girl. She was happy, and she seemed to know what she was doing. 

"I won't tell anyone" she heard herself saying, almost before she had articulated the thought to herself. 

Joey frowned. She didn't naturally like hiding things, let alone having someone else hide for her. But she didn't want to tell people yet. There had been such a fuss about her writing, her first book. She didn't know whether people would be shocked at this new direction, or be over enthusiastic and set her up to higher heights than she was really ready for yet. 

All she wanted was a bit of time to find out what she wanted, whether this was a brief adventure or a lifetime passion. She didn't want supervision, or claustrophobic 'support,' or to be called back to supervise children and help out in the school. 

She wanted to explain, let Corney know it wouldn't be forever, try to articulate the confusion within her about it all. But would it seem like she was being critical of her sister and Jem ? Would Corney understand? 

She didn't know, but Corney's assurance of secrecy was a relief. She looked at the younger girl. Somehow she had always seen Corney as much younger than her, but they weren't that different really. She decided to try to explain, and was pleasantly suprised with how easily she could talk to Corney, and how astute the girl was about things. 

They parted afterwards, both with a lot to think about, but closer than they had been before. Joey was glad to have someone else know her secret, but also still be able to carry on without her actions being general knowledge. 

Corney was still worried about Joey and Stanley Arnold, but was pleased to know that Joey seemed happy. She couldn't be sure, but Corney had a feeling that this performing was more than a passing phase for Joey, and she was secretly quite proud of knowing her right from the start.

\---

Several months later.

Dear Madge, 

I know you will not be expecting another letter from me, but this is a little different from my usual epistles.

I am writing to you to try to explain something that has happened, and I do hope that you will understand and forgive me. 

I told you that I had joined a Musical theatre group here. Well it is, in fact, a professional one. I am in a successful show here on Broadway, which is something that quite amazes me. 

I only began it as a way to pass the time. But I have been getting very good feedback, and I am finding that I love performing. 

I have hated lying by omission, but I was afraid to tell you, as I didn't know whether you, or really Jem, would approve. I don't quite know how it happened, but Madge it really has done me a world of good. I feel that I am in the right place for me. 

I know you will be disappointed about me perhaps not continuing to be an author full time, but I do still write, I don't think that I could ever have a life without writing. 

I have also had other news that you may be disappointed about. My publisher has said that my stories are not what is wanted in today's market. There are several adventure writers, and one of them particularly, a Mrs Blyton, is also writing school stories. Although they feel that my writing is in fact deeper and my characters more realistic, she already has a very large and active fan base. I would be in competition with her directly, and it is not something that my publisher feels we would succeed in doing without radical changes to my stories. I don't want to make those changes simply for the sake of money.

They are still interested in me as an author, but they do not want any more Patrol Leader Nancy at present. 

One of the reasons that I am writing to you now is that when I received the publisher's letter I realised that I actually wasn't as disappointed as I would have been if I had lost my role in the show.

This made me realise that I needed to tell you. My life is changing direction, and I really want to share that with you. 

I have spoken to Mr Flower and he has arranged with some of his contacts for me to change my paperwork to allow me to work here officially. He was not happy about doing so without reference to you, however he realised that I would find a way somehow anyway, and so he said that he would prefer to know what I was doing and it all be above board and legal, than me try to find my way alone. 

I do hope that you can feel the same, my darling Madge. It is a respectable show, and the people here are so kind to me. I have hated hiding this from you, and I am so sorry to have done so. 

I have enclosed some of the recent reviews of the show. I am using the name Jo Wilson, and I am going to continue to do so, as it allows me to keep my personal life separate from my theatre life. 

I will stop here, and will be awaiting your reply, I do hope you can understand. 

With all love,

Joey. 

Madge sat back, staring at the letter in her hand. She really wasn't sure what to think about it all. Her first instinct was to say that Joey ought to return immediately, that the theatre was not an appropriate career. 

However, as she recovered from the shock, she read between the lines of Joey's letter. Her sister was an adult, and she was clearly happy in this new life. Mr Flower was no fool, and he saw Joey as an adopted relative. If he thought that there was a serious risk to the young woman, Madge was sure that he would not have agreed to help her. 

Madge was also slightly relieved. When she had read the first few lines, her immediate fear had been that Joey was pregnant. She had been glad to find such a relatively mild confession instead. 

Her main concern was telling Jem. After his sister's experiences in Australia, he may well be unwilling to listen to reason. He saw Joey as his own sister, or almost as a child of his own, and was hugely protective of her. 

In the distance she heard the sound of visitors at the front door. Assuming that she would be notified if they were for her, Madge continued to re read the letter and reviews. She couldn't help a feeling of pride as she saw the praise for her young sister. 

Her study door opened, and Jem came in, shortly followed by another man. In surprise Madge realised it was Mr Flower. She stood up and greeted him, unable to help looking at the letter from Joey just before she did so. He followed the line of her gaze and smiled. 

"I see my timing is just right," he said, as he greeted Madge. "Would I be correct in saying that you have heard from your rapscallion of a sister?"

She smiled an answer, while Jem tensed and looked between the two of them, wondering what Joey had been up to now. His mind immediately went to her health, and he began mentally working out how to either get to her or bring her home. 

They moved to a more comfortable room, and Mr Flower began to talk. 

"I was worried to begin with, however it really does seem to be all above board. A respectable theatre, even a prestigious one. I had some words to say to her about how secretively she had gone about things," he said. 

They nodded, it wasn't really completely honest to have behaved the way Joey had. 

"However it really is quite an achievement. She has become a star on Broadway already, which is almost unheard of for such a young untrained newcomer." he added. 

"Well, she was trained, at least as far as her voice is concerned, by Tristan Denny from around the age of 12. Although in choral work of course, nothing modern." Madge couldn't help adding. 

"That is true" Mr Flower agreed. "Even so, with relatively little training and experience, she has taken to the musical theatre stage like... Well like a duck to water, for want of a better phrase."

Jem, meanwhile, had given no indication of his opinion. He wasn't quite sure what to think. This whole thing sounded like it would put Joey at risk, and the girl was so innocent in many ways. He thought of his sister Margot, so fragile after her experiences. Joey was another one who was highly strung, and the hours kept by Show People would hardly allow proper rest if she were to fall ill. 

"Jem," his wife said, able to tell from his silence that he was not happy with all of this "It does sound as though she is safe, at least as much as any young woman away from home."

He frowned. Flower seemed to think that this was not too serious. However, much as Jem respected him, the man was, well ... American. Their views on what was improper for a girl of good family could well be quite different to the principles Jem held dear. 

Joey was still under 21. Jem could pull strings of his own to get the paperwork for working in the US repealed. Perhaps he ought to do that. Get the girl safe back with the family. 

Mr Flower did not know all of the thoughts and plans passing through his friend's mind, however he had a shrewd idea of Jem's likely feelings on the matter. This was one reason he had been glad to use the excuse of business issues after the Anschluss to return to the Tyrol. 

"The simple fact is Russell, that the girl has been bitten by the acting bug, and bitten hard. She is a good girl, but she knows her mind, and it was clear to me that she will pursue this, with our help and approval or not. I hate to admit to feelin' helpless, but that young lady is determined. I decided that it was better to keep her on side than have her go through less savoury characters for help"

With this, he explained a little about Stanley, and also the risks that they had of losing Joey if they tried to stop her. 

Jem still wasn't happy about all of this, but he saw his friend's point. He grudgingly agreed with Madge that they would be cautiously supportive. He really didn't want to bring the girl back to Austria, if he was honest with himself. The Anschluss had brought about many changes. He had been inspected by Nazi officials at the San, and advised that if he wanted to avoid trouble, he ought to dismiss any Austrian or German staff, as should Madge from the school. 

He gave up trying to thinking of ways to stop Joey, and turned his mind to whether he ought to be getting the rest of the family out of the country. Flower was a good judge of political situations, and it would be useful to have his opinion. 

Dearest Joey, 

Your last letter did contain some shocks, it has to be said. I am sad you felt that you had to hide, however I am glad that you have told us now. 

We have some concerns, as I am sure you will understand, however you have a good ally in Mr Flower. He has assured us that he is watching over you. Please do listen to his advice if he does feel the situation changes, Joey baba. We know you are an adult now, but he does know New York and America better than any of us do. 

I have framed your reviews, and they sit now in my study, in pride of place, next to your books. So many things to be proud of already, before you are even 21. But don't overdo it, Joey, remember your health and don't put yourself under too much pressure.

There was some excitement at the weekend, Jack and Rosalie have finally become engaged, although in a rather unconventional manner! 

The whole thing began after a stressful incident with a local Nazi woman while Jack, Rosalie, Hilary Burn and the Robin were on a picnic. 

Robin and Hilary ended up being lost in some caves for a while. Luckily Hilary had the sense to bring Robin straight down here, and she has not suffered any ill effects from the adventure. 

Jack had to go for questioning with the authorities afterwards, and while nothing has come of it from official quarters, the whole situation does seem to have brought things to a head between him and Rosalie.

Rosalie is not going to make too much of a fuss about it at present, as Juliet has only just celebrated her own marriage. 

She and Jack wanted me to tell you about it, however. I think that they worry that you might be upset, but if I know you, you will probably be relieved and happy for them. I hope that that is the case, for they are truly well suited for each other. She manages him beautifully, and he stops her from working too hard, which is nice to see. 

They have made the decision that both working at the San might be a little too difficult to maintain boundaries, so Rosalie is going to work as School Secretary. The pupils have become fewer but the paperwork always seems to multiply! It is something that Hilda does need help with, so it will be most satisfactory all round I feel. 

I must finish this now, Robin, Daisy and Nell Wilson are to head down to Spartz today with Hilary Burn, and they will post it for me if I can get it ready before they go. 

With all love 

Madge.

\---

Joey looked at the letter. The delay in it reaching her made that last paragraph almost chilling to read. 

Mr Flower had returned to America the day before, with the terrifying news that there had been a mob attack on Herr Goldman, a jewish jeweller in Spartz. Joey was painfully proud of Robin and Daisy for being so brave, but their actions in defending him had led to the whole group having to flee the Nazi authorities. 

All that any of them knew at present was that Jack, Rosalie, Robin, Hilary, Gottfried and Nell were somewhere in either Austria or Germany, believed to be heading by foot for Switzerland. Jo knew that all of her extended family were in danger as long as they stayed in the Tyrol. They were all leaving, some heading to England, others to America. The little community that had been made up of the San and school was no more. Austrian and German doctors were to take over the San buildings, and the school had been officially closed for now, if not forever. 

It just seemed like a bad dream. 

The safe, familiar Austria that Jo loved was now a place of potential danger. The friendly people that she had seen going about their lives for years were now the same people making up angry mobs, attacking people. Some indeed were murderers, because Herr Goldman and his wife had been killed in the end. It chilled Jo to the bone to realise that they had been killed by the same mob who chased her friends and family into this frantic escape and exile. 

Murderers. Joey was having a real problem processing this fact. The ordinary gentle people that used to serve her coffee or cakes, or mend her shoes, the doctors and teachers that she used to talk to so freely. They were so caught up in this hatred, caught up in distress at the effects on their lives of the economic and political situation over the past few years. They needed scapegoats, and this government gave them scapegoats. The Jews for one option, non Aryan's for another. 

The Nazi government were hugely popular in Germany, after all they had introduced many things that made people's lives better.

Many in Austria felt the same, welcomed the Anschluss. Joey had never wanted to get involved in politics, she even understood why people wanted to be part of Germany, and certainly why not all Austrians were welcoming to Non Austrian people such as the British. After all, there had been a war between them and many other countries only a short time before. 

Joey understood the reasons, didn't think that the Austrians and Germans were evil, she knew them too well for that. But these issues led by Nazi policies were now overwhelming everything and everyone she held dear. Joey Bettany was having to see the people of her second homeland as potential enemies, accept that they would no longer welcome her. 

Joey rested her head in her hands for a moment. She felt unusually tearful for her. Quite apart from the worry about the escapees, everything had changed. Her happy little world, the rock that she could always return to had gone. 

If she left America now she would have only England to return to, and it sounded as though the School might well be finished, certainly there had been fewer and fewer pupils over the past few terms. Everything that made up her security, her home had gone and wouldn't ever be the same again.

There was a knock on the door. 

"Ten minutes, Miss Wilson" said a voice. 

"Thanks," Jo replied, hastily checking her face for damage to make up, automatically rearranging her costume to make it neat again. Even her stage name hurt, since the original owner of the name was now one of those on the run, one of the loved ones in such danger.

Jo stared at herself in the mirror. Although she didn't really realise it, this was quite a test of how serious she was in this career. 

Going on stage and singing her heart out, when her mind was so full of worry and sadness was a real challenge for her. 

She feared she wouldn't be able to do it, that her understudy would have to go on. But as she waited a few minutes later at the side of the stage, she felt something in her shift, and all at once she wasn't Jo Bettany, she was her character. The words of the script were a relief, they filled her brain without removing the worries, but just helped her to set them to one side for a while. 

It was much later that the reaction struck. In bed alone, Joey cried and cried. Robin particularly was like her younger sister. She wasn't strong, and the chance of her coping with a forced march and sleeping out in the open without taking harm was very low. The chance of any of them reaching Switzerland safely seemed to Jo remote. 

She almost wished that she was there, that she could be with that little group. If she were there she could help, even if it were only to support Robin, help her keep up. She shouldn't think like that, her own risk of health problems would have been another worry for the group, she should be glad she was not there, for everyone's sakes. 

Madge, Jem and the children would be leaving too, by car and officially allowed to go, but still at risk of being detained. Mademoiselle was ill, thought unlikely to survive, and several of Joey's friends were now unable to communicate with her without risk, especially those who were Austrian or German. 

She wanted to be there. Her own safety so far away was worthless to her with her family and friends in such danger. She wanted to be with them there. Not here. 

Not here.


	5. Chapter 5

A day later Joey sat at her dressing table, drained and exhilarated all at the same time. It had been one of their best performances tonight. All of the risky moments had gone well, no-one had missed a mark, even the worst of the cast, a young relative of the theatre owner, had almost been singing in tune. 

The audience had responded with enthusiasm, and the cast had had to take bow after bow. Now Joey was exhausted, starting to drop down from the high that performing that well always gave her. 

A knock on the door made her raise her head. She called out to "Come in", and Stanley put his head around the door. 

Joey smiled a tired welcome. He saw that she was decent, and came in the room, then sat down. 

She listened as he circled around the meaning of his visit, then finally asked her to come out with a group of the audience, including two of the owners of the theatre. 

She wanted to say no, to either go home and collapse into bed, or to go out with some of her friends from the cast. But Stanley had been a good advisor so far, and Joey knew that she needed to show herself socially more, if this was going to be her career now. 

So she sighed and promised to meet him in the theatre lobby in about twenty minutes. That would give her time to wash and change, get herself out of being her character. 

The evening had gone much as she had expected. The theatre owners treated her well, but almost like a commodity that they could call on to entertain their friends. 

The audience members were more polite, and very appreciative of her time. One young man was a little too friendly, but Joey just smiled politely, after all she didn't have to see them again. 

After the meal, the conversation turned, as it did so often these days, to politics in Europe. Joey tried to stay neutral, as one thing that she had learnt was that the New Yorkers were a truely multicultural bunch. You could rarely have a conversation about Europe without offending someone. 

She was, however getting more and more irritated with the way that some of them were talking as if the whole thing were a film, or show. Almost as if they thought the leaders of the countries involved were playing a game. 

One of the theatre owners started talking about how good the Anschluss had been for Austria, how it was just a return to the original state of things. She herself, with her passion for history, knew that the empire he talked about had actually been a far more loosely woven affair than Hitler's new Germany. 

As he continued with the benefits to the youth of Germany and Austria of the Hitler Youth groups, and then about how much more ordered the society must be with people reporting back all transgressions, even if performed by members of their family, Joey held herself in check. 

Finally, as the pompous fool paused for breath, she asked a few pertinent questions, and proved, with very little effort, that he didn't know or understand what he was talking about. 

He tried to laugh it off with patronising comments about not worrying her pretty little head about such things, but Joey's passion for history, and near obsession with Napoleon stood her in good stead. She argued from cause to effect with barely an effort, frustrating the theatre owner hugely and, had she realised, embarrassing him in front of his friends, who were soon nodding along with Joey's points.

Feeling irritated with herself for letting down her guard and choosing a side, Joey made her excuses quite early and left. Stanley watched her go with relief. He didn't care about the politics, but he could see the danger in upsetting such a major player as the theatre owner. 

"You will have to excuse Miss Wilson," he said as soon as she had gone. "She has family in the areas under discussion, she cannot be expected to be rational about these things."

But the damage was done. The man she had debated to such an obvious defeat was not one to take an insult lightly. He wanted his stars to be pretty, bring in box office returns and be seen with him in public. This girl was not going to get away with making a fool of him in front of his friends. He pursed his lips and made a mental note to have his secretary check her contract on Monday. 

Stanley saw the warning signs and groaned inwardly. He wished that he had never tried to pursude Joey to come out, had made an excuse about a headache or something similar

Joey walked along the Broadway, the conversation a distant memory already, buried in the heap of concerns for her friends and family's welfare. And particularly for Robin. 

She arrived at the flat, made a cup of tea and sat in the living area, pondering what she should do now. Whether she ought to leave New York. 

Until Madge and Jem had arrived and settled in their new location she could do nothing. She made a mental note to check where Guernsey was on the map. 

She couldn't even begin to allow the thought that Jack, Rosalie and the others might not get through, despite the fact that she knew the chance of them escaping unharmed was low. 

So once they reached Guernsey, what then? If Joey went back, what would she do? She didn't have her publisher any more, not without making changes that Joey was not willing to make. She would be back to helping with the children, joining in at the school. She could see herself now going mad without the buzz of performing. Also, as she thought more deeply, she realised that if there were financial difficulties involved in the move, then her presence would just add to them, another mouth to feed. 

It was a hard decision for impetuous, warm hearted Jo, but she realised eventually that the grand gesture of returning to the fold would do nobody any good. 

She would stay in New York, continue in the show that she loved, be available if ever needed, but not volunteer to return until that point. 

Finally, having settled her thoughts, Joey drifted off to sleep. Her future was a little clearer, and she didn't have to give up her independence, nor her part in the show.

\---

'All of that worry' thought Joey. 'All of that agonising over the decision, and now after all that, in the end it wasn't to be anyway!'

She leant over the rail, deep in thought. She had learnt the hard way that sometimes it doesn't matter how good you are, how popular you have made a show. If you don't have the right backing, you cannot fight a system biased towards those in power. 

Barely a week after that meal with the theatre owner she had found herself out of the show, and with no one else on Broadway willing to hire her. She had made a powerful enemy, and he had managed to make her continuing in New York theatre an impossibility. The people who would defy him and see her were presenting material far too political or seedy for Joey to feel happy about joining their shows. 

Stanley had disappeared, deserted her as her star began to fall, and she realised as the months went on, what a fragile dream it had all been. 

At least she had a place to go now. By a miracle, it seemed to her, the whole of the band of escapees had survived the trek. They had had a narrow escape apparently, when riders sent to find them had almost overtaken Hilary and Robin. With great presence of mind, Hilary had covered her clearly english face, and shouted some Romany at the riders. Hearing the words they assumed them to be Gypsies. The riders had simply sworn at them and ridden on, with no idea that their quarry had been so near. 

'I was so grateful to you, Joey, at that moment' Hilary had written to Joey not long after the little group had reached safety. 

'I never realised how useful it would be, you teaching us how to swear in Romany just before you left! A true skill to put on my college application! - It also worked perfectly, by the way, in the way you originally intended. We all used that collection of words really often last year, to avoid letting the middles know that they had annoyed us, and avoid embarrassing slang fines! Coming from St Scholastika's where no one really worried too much about our language, as long as it was reasonably ladylike, it was quite a shock to the system to come to the Chalet School where quite mild slang is forbidden!

I am sorry that I won't see you before I go to teacher training college, I do hope if you ever come back to the UK that you will look me up. I am going to be studying on the outskirts of London. Although I would guess that London would seem a very small place to you now compared to New York...'

The rest of Hilary's letter had gone on to tell her about general school gossip and also Jack and Rosalie's wedding.

It had been a quiet, slightly subdued affair apparently, for with Rosalie's father being a member of the church, she was quietly firm in her own faith, and not willing to change to Catholicism. According to Hilary, this didn't seem to worry Jack, but upset his family. They refused to acknowledge Rosalie as his wife, the only exception being his twin Mollie, who couldn't attend due to being so far away. 

Joey stared out over the sea, trying not to despair at having to return home in such a depressing way. At least the new location for the school and San sounded like a nice one, and it would be wonderful to see everyone again. 

She heard a noise beside her, and greeted Corney, who smiled at her, but didn't start talking, knowing Joey was still immersed in her thoughts. 

Cornelia was traveling to rejoin the Chalet School, her father having wanted her to complete her education there if at all possible. The two of them rested in companionable silence looking out over the waves, until it was time to go and change for dinner. 

Madge rearranged the bedclothes a fifth time, and tidied up the flowers that Robin and Daisy had picked to welcome Joey home. She wanted everything to be perfect for Joey, wanted her to know that it was family that was home, not a place, or even a country. 

"Come ON Aunt Madge !" called an impatient Daisy from downstairs. "She will be here soon! We need to get over to the dock to welcome her !"

Madge smiled. Daisy was totally thrilled to have Joey home, and it was nice to see her active and happy. Daisy and Primula's mother Margot had barely survived the move, finally slipping away a few months before. Daisy had been unusually subdued for her, with a tendency to tears, and Jo's return was a welcome distraction. 

Madge surveyed the room. She herself was excited, she hadn't been parted from Joey for this long in their lives. Her sister would be changed, an adult, but she was sure there was still little Joey underneath.

As the ship reached the dock and stopped, Joey looked out at the parts of the island that she could see. It was so flat compared to the Alps! She had known it would be, but it was still a culture shock to be going 'home' to this new and strange place. 

All of a sudden, she saw Madge's face in the little crowd, and all thoughts of mountains left her. That precious face, more a mother than a sister, beamed up at her from the landing stage. 

Joey couldn't help but beam back and hurry off the boat to grab hold of her sister, then hug a suddenly shy Daisy. 

Madge herself was finding it hard not to show her shock. Joey had gone away barely more than a child, now in front of her was a neatly coiffured and fashionable young woman. Madge almost felt shy of this new Jo, confident and brisk in her movements. It didn't last long, but Madge realised then just how much of an adult Joey now was. 

Later Joey gave them all a brief show based on some of her Broadway work. Madge watched in awe as Joey became the character, drew them away from the cramped living room to the world painted in the show's script. 

Her half formed plans to ask Joey to stay and help with the children seemed silly now. She was meant to do this, it was clear. A little probing gave Madge the real reason for Joey having to leave New York, and she resolved to tackle Jem on the subject of supporting Joey, helping her to make this her career in the UK. 

For now Joey was glad to be with her family, exclaiming over how big the babes had grown, and teasing Daisy into fits of the giggles. She held onto Robin as if the younger girl might suddenly disappear, and the happiness on Robin's face was evidence enough that the feeling was mutual. 

For that night, Jo Wilson the star of musical theatre was safely packed away at the back if her mind. Joey Bettany was at the fore, happy to be amongst loved ones once more.

\---

Joey blinked up at the ceiling. Something was different. But what? 

As she awoke properly she realised that of course, she was in Guernsey, not New York. The familiar noise of a city was absent, and the early morning light was a different shade, without the street lights added to it. 

Joey had had a similar surprise on her first night back, when going out for some fresh air. She had been momentarily shocked by how dark it was, before realising that of course it would be, they were in the countryside. Once she had got over the strange feeling of not having constant light outside, Joey enjoyed the inky darkness. It was good to be able to retreat outside and her face not be visible, she could hide away a bit. 

Joey was really glad to be at home, but it was strange knowing that she didn't have the show to go to each night. She still found her mind and body beginning to wind up in readiness in the late afternoon, and it was hard to get to sleep at the relatively early hours kept by the family in Guernsey. 

She was hugely grateful to be able to have this bolthole, however strange it felt at times. She realised that she was lucky to have a safe home and no requirement to work at present. After so long apart from everyone, she was also still enjoying that thrill of being well loved friend arriving, and seeing how the others had either changed or stayed the same. 

Rosalie Dene, Rosalie Maynard now, was one person who had changed. She was stronger, more confident than Joey remembered. The near capture and dangers involved in their flight from Austria had brought her natural capabilities to the fore. Starting a home somewhere completely new, and the family dramas around her wedding to Jack had also given her an edge of self reliance not there before.

Joey had been glad to see a return to the more active Rosalie, having felt her friend to have taken her position as daughter of a clergyman and secretary overly seriously before. She wasn't much older than Joey, but had seemed to consider herself apart previously. Now the two women could talk much more like friends again, rather than with the slight distance that Rosalie had imposed a year or so ago. 

In fact, although Joey wouldn't realise it herself, this change was also one caused by Joey's own maturing. Before she had left, Joey had been quite socially unaware, laughing at conventions of adult behaviour, or internally rebelling at them. 

Having learnt to be more self sufficient in New York, Joey was now an easier person to be around, less inclined to jump in and take over a conversation or to make snap judgements and blurt out her thoughts. 

Rosalie and Jack had been nervous about meeting Joey again, but she was so clearly happy for them both, that they relaxed soon enough, and all three could tell quite quickly that they seemed likely to return to their previous easy friendship. 

Joey got out of bed, and began to wash and dress. Thinking about Jack and Rosalie had reminded her of the plans for the day. The newly weds had made friends with another young couple on the island. Rosalie had assured Joey that she would like Janie and Julian Lucy, and a picnic had been planned for the day to introduce everyone to each other. 

Joey was a little nervous, after all she would be the only unmarried one present. She did want to try to get to know some people here though, especially as she didn't know how long she would be living there. 

It had been chance that gave her a start on Broadway, she had no idea where to start in the UK. She was slightly depressed with her loss of the theatre life, and tired, so the idea of resting and being a maiden aunt just now was appealing. 

Joey had also been struck with a story idea about a young actress, and was quite tempted to have a try at writing it. It wasn't a children's book, but she did have a hope in the past that she could become an author of historical fiction, perhaps this was a time to try that route. 

For now, however, she resisted the draw of the plotlines and characters whirling in her head, and set off to join the family at the breakfast table. 

She put her head in the nursery door on her way past, and had an eggy spoon waved towards her by David, a chortle of greeting from Sybil and clamours to join them from Peggy and Rix. Bride and Jackie merely smiled shyly at her, still a little overwhelmed by this new, more grown up Aunty Jo. 

She laughed and promised to visit them in the nursery later, before beating a retreat downstairs to the main dining room.

Madge smiled at her, and Robin and Daisy looked up at her with huge grins. They were thrilled still to have her back, and their joy at her company made her wonder sometimes how she had managed to stay so far away for so long.

"Is Jem not up yet?" Joey asked, as she sat down. "Or has he been called away again?"

"Called away, unfortunately" said Madge. "They are so short staffed at present that he and Jack are pretty much living at the San."

"That must be quite lonely for Rosalie" said Jo, with a frown. "I don't think I would like being a doctor's wife, no fixed routine, him being called away all the time. I don't quite see the point of being married if you barely see each other"

Madge laughed at this last statement. "Oh you would get used to it, Joey. You just cherish the moments that you are together all the more." 

Joey smiled back at her sister and let the matter go. After all, Madge was herself married to a doctor and she seemed happy enough. Joey knew that Jem, at least, would still like her to end up married to a nice doctor, preferably one attached to the San. But there was no way that Joey could see that being her future. 

She saw to her surprise that there was a letter by her plate, postmarked New York. There were very few people who knew that she was back in Guernsey, so she assumed that it was Corney's aunt or Mr Flower. 

Opening the letter she was even more confused to see an unfamiliar hand, the writing more rounded than she was used to, although perfectly clear. 

Dear Miss Wilson

I do hope that you do not mind me using your stage name rather than your original name, which I believe to be Bettany. Having been introduced to you under the name Wilson, I find it hard not to think of you that way. Please do let me know if you would prefer me not to do so. 

I really ought to introduce myself properly. My name is Richard Warren-Jennings, of the New England Warren-Jennings.

I was present at a meal with you, after a most entertaining performance of your show. We had a fascinating conversation that evening about the current and historical situation in Europe. The evening was hosted by my Uncle, your employer at that time, and unfortunately you and I did disagree with his viewpoint on some issues. 

I wanted at the time to get to know you further, but you were not keen, being perhaps understandably distracted by your family situation. 

You may not remember me at all, with your worry about their safety. I believe they completed their escape shortly after our last meeting, I do hope they did so with no lasting effects. There are more and more stories of escapes such as theirs having to be made. I believe those holding my Uncle's views are already falling to a minority as emigrants from Europe arrive daily to tell their tales of the current events. 

The reason that I am contacting you at this time is that I have recently returned to New York, only to find out about the difficulties caused for you by my Uncle's displeasure. I am so very sorry to find out that your career has been temporarily halted this way. 

I unfortunately have no influence with my Uncle, and much as I am distressed to say it, he does have a tendency to hold a grudge. I am most concerned however to have been partial cause of such an awkward situation for you. 

I attempted to find you in New York, and finally tracked you down via a mutual friend, Mr Flower. He agreed only to give me the address of your relatives, although he would not tell me whether that was your current location. You have a good and protective friend in Mr Flower I feel. I understand his wariness, given my family connections and my Uncle's behaviour. 

However I wish if at all possible to make amends of a sort. I have no useful contacts on Broadway I am afraid to say. 

However I do have some influence on the London stage. I do not know whether you wish to continue in your career as an actress, but if you do, I hope that you will find the enclosed letter of introduction useful. 

Mr Flower informs me that you are a woman of many talents, and already a published author. You may decide to return to that career, in which case I do wish you well in that route. However, if I can help in any way in either occupation, please do feel free to contact me. 

I wish you and your family all the best now and in the future,

Yours Sincerely

Mr Richard Warren Jennings III 

-


	6. Chapter 6

Rosalie sat on the hill, watching Jack, Janie and Julian Lucy all laughing at something Jo was saying. She tried not to be jealous, but she couldn't help a little envy creeping in. The joy at Jo's return and the fact that she was not angry about their wedding had initially been a relief, and Rosalie had been glad to have her friend back. But now she felt quite mixed in her feelings, slightly unsure of herself. 

It seemed as though Jo didn't even really have to try, she just ended up friends with everyone. Rosalie was more reserved, more aware of the possible negatives of life than Joey was, perhaps more cynical. 

It was strange for Rosalie, watching the little group. All J's together, as they had enthusiastically discussed earlier. Two active demonstrative women, two slightly more reserved, protective men. Rosalie was feeling a little nauseous today, so had volunteered to stay with the picnic baskets, while the others went for a short walk. 

Jack had wanted to stay, but a pleading look from Jo had led to Rosalie convincing him to go with the group. She knew Jo was nervous about meeting the Lucys. Now she wished that she hadn't done so, as the four of them seemed so right together. It felt as though it were two couples she was watching, Jack and Joey seemed to somehow fit together. 

She knew that she was being silly. Jack had told her how glad he was that he hadn't ended up married to Joey, and she knew that Joey said that she wasn't interested in Jack. But somehow her brain wouldn't listen to common sense, she couldn't stop thinking that Joey would have suited Jack better. 

Rosalie was trying not to be jealous of Joey's life experiences, as well. Although everyone told her that she was a born administrator, and she loved her job, somehow she couldn't help but feel that it paled in comparison to being a Broadway actress and published author. Joey always had been slightly larger than life, Rosalie knew, but it was more noticeable now that she had been away. Rosalie felt very bland, beside the vibrant Jo. 

The last year had been a hard one for Rosalie, and she had suffered a lot through worrying about Jack while he was being interrogated by the Nazis, then the flight from Austria. She felt, in the little envious part of her, almost angry to see Jo back now with almost a hero's welcome. She had been safe and warm, in a country without Nazi control, when Rosalie had been hiding in ditches and worrying about the Robin and other youngsters in the group. 

It wasn't fair to Jo, she knew that, after all most people so far had not been touched directly by the Nazi occupation in the way that they had, and Joey had obviously been worried about them all. She didn't ask for the fuss that had been made on her return, it just happened. 

The little group on the path ahead of her were turning back, still laughing and joking between them all. Rosalie was almost afraid to look at Jack's body language, trying to tell herself that she was being silly, that he wasn't standing closer to Jo than he needed to, wasn't seeming more relaxed than was normal with a close friend. 

They had reached a distance where faces could be seen. Rosalie was touched, and gratified to see Jack looking up at her as soon as it was possible. He quickened his pace, drew ahead of the group, and was soon sitting beside her, her hand clasped in his larger one. 

He knew his wife, knew how sensible and rational she was, how normally cheerful she was. So to see her looking so forlorn and lonely up on the hill had pulled him to want to be close to her, to comfort her, even without knowing why she looked that way. 

He watched the rest of the group reach the top of the hill, and accepted some teasing from Julian about how eager he was to return to his bride. 

They settled down to eat the picnic, and the chat turned to talk of the school starting again. It was to be a much smaller affair than previously, but they had still kept more girls than they had once hoped possible. Many of the previous staff were to come to Guernsey too, and they hoped to be up and running soon. 

Jack sat close to Rosalie, unsure what was bothering her, but knowing with that instinct of a partner that something was wrong. He suspected the reason, but didn't quite want to broach the subject, for fear he would make her think there was an issue about him having feelings for Jo, when there really wasn't 

He looked at the tall dark woman sitting chatting to Janie Lucy. He had told Rosalie that he had no romantic feelings for Joey, and this picnic had just confirmed that for him even more strongly. He felt affection for her, saw her like a younger sister. But her mercurial moods, her tactlessness on occasion, and her lack of focus and slightly self involved nature all just highlighted to him what a near miss he had had. 

He was so glad to think of how strong and brave Rosalie was, and how much more organised she was in her brain than flighty Jo. He was so proud of the way that Rosalie had coped with the flight from the Nazi's, and he thanked God daily for having been able to help her safely through that ordeal. 

He was also proud of his wife for her stand about the religion issue. He was strong in his own beliefs, and he respected the fact that she didn't just bow to his family, even while he did worry about how they would arrange things for any children if they came along. 

He didn't quite dare to hope that the nausea might be what he thought it was, that they might be parents sooner than expected. He wasn't enough of an expert to be sure, and he was still a little shy about asking Rosalie about her cycle. So he just held her hand now, trying to give reassurance for whatever it was that was worrying her, and hoping that that would help.

Joey sat to one side of the little group, trying not to feel left out. She was glad for Jack and Rosalie, and both Janie and Julian Lucy seemed nice enough. She didn't envy them their coupledom, she wasn't in a place in her life where she really wanted to bend to another person's needs and wishes. 

But she did miss having friends around to chat to, and she had enjoyed one on one discussions, on all sorts of topics, in the past with Jack, before she realised that his feelings might be deeper than those of a friend. Now he still talked, but his eyes flicked back to Rosalie the whole time, checking that she was safe and just seeming to need to look at her. 

Joey sighed. She thought about the letter she had had that morning, and wondered whether she really could attempt a career in London. She didn't know at all whether she would be welcomed or shunned for having been on Broadway. The letter might help, but did she want to use it? Should she start at the bottom again? See what happened without people pulling strings for her? She didn't know.

Later that evening, the same train of thought returned to her, and she stared into the fire, lost in all of the conflicting futures she needed to think about. 

Madge looked at her younger sister with affection. She could see that Joey was wrestling with something, and had a shrewd idea what that something might be. She wanted so much to say to Joey "Stay here, safe on Guernsey, stay and be with me just a few years more. Write your stories, help in the school, be there while the children grow up" 

But she loved Joey, and knew that she needed more than the school and San could offer. Even the family she loved was not enough to fulfill her now that she had tasted the addiction of being on the stage. 

Madge decided to take the bull by the horns. 

"So how long will you be with us?" she asked, in a casual tone. Joey started and looked at her with a question. Madge smiled at her confusion. 

"Joey baba, I know you love us all, but you need the theatre life now, I can see it in you. The only question is whether it is England or America that you chose for your career. I ... I'd prefer you to be nearer, but you know the theatre business there better, perhaps you should return to the States?"

Joey gazed at her wordlessly. She had been sitting there worrying about how to broach the subject with Madge, and here her sister was, already two steps ahead. 

"I... I don't know really" she said. "I want to be near to all of you too if I can, but I just don't know if I have the right style for England, for the West End."

Madge was tempted to say, 'Of course you do, you will be able to work here just as much as in NewYork'. However, even as she opened her mouth she realised that she herself didn't really know. 

"You will have to find out, then Joey" was all she said. "You wanted an adventure - well few adventures come with a guide, you will have to take a leap, and hope you land well."

Joey smiled at her sister, grateful for the honesty and support. 

"But... Oh I know it will sound silly... But I can't help worrying ... Perhaps I am meant to be a writer, not an actress? I've been attacked by story ideas recently too" she said. "I thought I ought to get back to my writing, stay here and help with the children."

Madge was hugely tempted to follow this plan, keep Joey with her longer, but she knew that it wasn't right in the long term. 

"You can write in London just as well as here," she said. "Perhaps better, as you need to experience life to really write about it."

Her sister nodded slowly in agreement. Her last objection circled in her brain, and she finally said it out loud.

"London is so ... Noisy, and busy though" said Joey, wrinkling her nose in a way hugely reminiscent of the youngster that used to complain about being in England and crave returning to Austria almost as soon as they touched UK soil. 

"Get rooms just outside then, there are plenty of nice suburbs to London" replied Madge, not about to let her little sister get away with running away from the idea. "Hilary Burn was just writing to Nell the other day, saying that she wished she could find someone to share her flat next year. Send her a message and find out whether the room is still available."

Joey looked thoughtful for a moment, then nodded decisively. 

"That does sound a good plan, thank you Madge, I will. To London and further adventure it is!" she said, ending with a laugh that Madge echoed. 

To London it was to be, since Hilary was only too glad to have someone that she already knew to share with her. A month later, Joey kissed the tearful nieces and nephews, waved at family and friends, and boarded a ferry to the mainland. The next stage of her adventure had begun.

\---

Hilary opened the door, and gave out a dramatic yell, followed by a bear hug and directing Jo into the narrow hallway. 

"You made good time!" she exclaimed. "I wasn't expecting you for hours yet! Come in, Come in!" 

Joey grinned at her friend's enthusiasm, curiously looking around as they passed through the hall. They arrived in a bright square living room, with doors into the next room open, so that light from the windows on both front and back of the converted house filled the space. 

Various mismatched chairs were scattered around, and a scarred wooden table stood at one end with papers spread all over it. 

Hilary was hurriedly scooping together the papers, muttering about revision notes taking over the world if they were given a chance. She bustled off to make them some tea, calling queries about the journey back to Joey in the living room. 

Jo decided it was easier to follow to the kitchen than shout from her current location, so went through a door in the back room to a cosy kitchen, just about big enough for two to be in there at a time. Hilary turned to smile a welcome as the kettle began to boil. 

"It's not much, but it's warm and dry and convenient for the station" she said, gesturing around at the flat, looking slightly worried. 

Joey reassured her with a wide smile. "It's great Hilary." she said. "I'm just wondering where the... Er... Facilities are?"

Hilary chuckled and went back out into the hallway. "Here you go," she said, opening a door to a bathroom with claw foot tub and a deep sink, as well as the "facilities" discussed. 

"Your room is the one on the left of the kitchen if you want to have a look," Hilary said as she shot back to the little kitchen to rescue the whistling kettle. "Come back through when you have had a freshen up." 

Joey shut the door and looked around the bathroom. It was small again, but functional and spotlessly clean. She was keen to see her room, so was glad that Hilary had pointed out which one it was. 

The bedroom turned out to be better even than expected. The tall ceilings of the Victorian house gave a sense of airiness, and space, but it's proximity to the kitchen made it comfortably warm and cosy. There was a bed, chair and desk, with a gaily patterned rug on the floor between them. 

She returned to the kitchen, relieved to feel already so comfortable here. A nervous Hilary provided tea and looked at her friend over the edge of her own cup. 

"Is it...are you happy with it? Your room." she asked finally. Joey was quick to reassure her, and Hilary relaxed finally. 

They settled into the living room for a good gossip, then Hilary went back off into the kitchen to make them some food, refusing Joey's help with a laughing promise that it would be her turn soon enough.

Joey settled back in her armchair, and felt quietly confident that this would work. She was already enjoying the feeling of being only responsible for herself. 

Even in New York she had been watched over by Corney's Aunt like a mother hen. Here she could have the company of a good friend, but also retreat to her own room when needed. 

The next few months were a strange mix of highs and lows. Exploring the city with an adult's eyes, Joey had discovered many things she loved about it, and she found it far less manic and busy than New York, so her childhood aversion to it left her on the first day exploring. 

However her search for work on the stage was less successful. Joey didn't want to use the letter of introduction, but she was quickly finding that she was not getting a chance to even audition. 

"Surely they can't ignore the fact that you have already been in a successful show on Broadway?" Hilary asked one night, seeing how worn down her friend was, and wishing that she could help. 

"The problem is that it seems that lots of theatre hopefuls claim to have been in Broadway shows." said an exhausted Joey with a sigh. "I only found out today that they don't tend to believe it, and so of course they think I have no real experience. They won't even look at my review cuttings, they say that things like that can be faked too easily."

She rubbed a tired hand across her forehead, closing her eyes as she continued. 

"If they would only let me audition before turning me down! At least then I could get a real measure of whether I gave what it takes, I could see the other people auditioning, know whether I am wasting my time or not."

Hilary was quiet for a moment. She understood why Joey didn't want preferential treatment, but it seemed so unfair. She had tried to convince Jo to use the letter before, to no avail. But as she looked at the dispirited face before her, she felt she had to try again. 

"Look Joey," she began. "Maybe you are thinking about this the wrong way. If you hadn't had the problem with your employer, which wasn't your fault, well - you could have had references for your show, couldn't you?" 

Joey nodded, still with her eyes shut, frown lines creasing her forehead as she tried to listen without falling asleep. 

"Well," said Hilary. "The letter is just replacing that, giving you a reference that ought to have been yours by right. It ISN'T the same as using it to jump the line - through no fault of your own you aren't even being allowed to join the queue!"

Joey didn't respond, but she was starting to think that Hilary was right. It made her so angry sometimes, thinking how her career had been cut short so quickly, and all due to politics. She resolved to attach the letter to her resume, it was worth a try. 

The producer and director sat back in their seats, waiting for the next candidate. The resume papers in front of them seemed unlikely to be true, they smacked of naive girl who had never even been to NewYork, but knew the name Broadway. They were very doubtful about her being any good but they had not wish to risk ignoring the letter of recommendation. They didn't have to hire the woman after all. 

"Probably some mistress or girlfriend of his wanting to be a star" sniffed the producer. "Let's get it over with, but remember to let her down gently, the Warren-Jennings family isn't one to take apparent insults well. This girl Wilson could well go straight back to him with any rudeness. A polite no should be enough, then we can get onto the real candidates."

Joey walked carefully into the middle if the stage, arriving at the perfect position with practiced ease. She opened her mouth to sing, giving her all into the minor part that she was auditioning for. The hall was silent for several minutes after she had finished, and unsure of the protocol, she began to leave the stage, sure that she had wasted her time.

\---

Joey rushed home in a better mood than she had been in for weeks. The audition for a minor character had resulted in huge praise from all involved, and turned into a request to come back again and audition for one of the lead female roles! 

It was a fairly new show called Me and My Girl, and if Joey could have chosen one West End show to get a part in at the moment, this was the ideal one. She loved the mixture of songs, and had enjoyed the songs and dance that she had been auditioning with for the minor character, which really helped her be able to get into the show. 

But she hadn't even dared think of attempting to audition for one of the major roles, so to be called back to try for this part was amazing. 

She couldn't believe it, it was a great part that she would have to play and she knew she would be able to do it. The only question in her own mind was whether she could do a convincing cockney accent or not. But she at least had a chance for something now ! After months of not getting past the doors of the theatres it was a great thing to know that she could do it. She was good enough for a West End show! 

She hurried into the flat, noticing briefly that Hilary seemed to be studying in her bedroom, as the door was shut. 

Joey busied herself with making herself a celebratory sandwich and fresh cup of tea. She ate it while sitting at the table, unable to stop herself from breaking out into a huge grin every now and again. 

Finally she couldn't resist, she had to tell someone . Hilary must have been studying for hours. She would take her a cup of tea and pass on the news as a short break in the studying. 

Joey tapped lightly on the door to Hilary's bedroom and entered, about to announce her news and offer the drink. 

But what she saw there made her back out quickly and quietly, put the tea back into the kitchen and rush to her own room with blazing red cheeks. She sat for a moment to settle herself, mind whirling with this new view of her friend.

The sudden image of Hilary's bare skin, covered only slightly by skewed bedcovers had totally thrown her off balance. Joey hadn't seen very clearly, wanting to get out before the sleeping pair awoke. 

But what she did know was that she had seen someone curled around the clearly naked Hilary. It wasn't clear who, and she was thankful that the stranger had been wrapped up apart from the top of their head. 

She smiled for a moment at the fact that whoever it was had obviously taken most of the covers in their sleep, even while holding Hilary cuddled near. It did suggest a closeness of relationship that she was glad of for Hilary's sake. 

She wasn't judgmental, just surprised. Hilary was still slightly in her mind the sixth former and then Head Girl, even after living together for a few months Joey still saw her in that way. 

But Hilary was an adult, a very capable one, and she was fully capable of making her own decisions. Joey was just a little surprised, as she hadn't seen any suitors around, but she hadn't been really looking for it. They worked well as flatmates because just had their own lives and met when they were both at home. 

Joey was regularly taken over by story ideas for days at a time, only leaving her room to eat or to go and see the different shows in the West End to work out the differences between there and Broadway. So there were plenty of times that someone could have visited like this before, without Jo realising.

Joey lay back on her bed, not sure what to think. In theory she was aware that not everyone her age obeyed the principle of waiting until being married. Especially in the theatre crowd in New York. But somehow it had taken until now to realise that people she had known for years might also be having relationships outside marriage. Finding Hilary like that had started Joey thinking about these things in a way she just hadn't before. 

The fact of Rosalie's own pregnancy, so soon after their marriage had made several people whisper about her and Jack, although the circumstances of their flight from Austria tended to mean people made allowances. 

She had confided in Joey about the baby just before she left, and Joey had just congratulated her but not really thought much about what it meant about her and Jack. Joey had just assumed if she thought about it at all that they HAD waited until marriage, since Rosalie was the daughter of a clergyman, and had always been quite shy. But as she did the maths she realised that it was likely that the gossips were correct.

Now it seemed that Hilary was sleeping with someone, without even an engagement. So perhaps in their private lives people didn't really wait, or remain celibate if unmarried? Jo was learning fast about other people these days, having never really analysed such things before. 

Although there had been nothing that she understood at the time, as she thought back, she was even reminded of occasions before their wedding where her sister's door was locked, followed by an "early visit to see if anyone fancied a walk." the next day from Dr Jem. The haram scarum Joey had thought nothing of it, but Grizel had made insinuations at the time which Joey had dismissed as Grizel being Grizel. Now she wasn't so sure. 

Hilary obviously wanted to keep this a secret, so Jo wouldn't mention it until she did. But she would certainly be knocking loudly before going into Hilary's room now!

Finally the excitement of the morning and the unexpected information about her friend caught up with her, and she dozed off.

\---

Hilary came into the kitchen to get some tea and biscuits. Although slightly surprised to see that there was a full cold cup on the side, she just tipped it out and put it in the sink to wash up later. 

She hurried back to her room, feeling the chill of the hall after the warm bedroom, and knocked the door shut with her foot, before handing over one cup of tea and getting back into bed to sit with her hands wrapped around her own drink. 

"Mmmm, thanks Hil," said her companion, enjoying the warmth of the tea before making an expedition into the biscuit jar in search of goodies. 

"Just make sure you leave some of the shortbread this time!" said Hilary. " I swear Joey must think I'm a complete pig !"

Her reply was merely a cheeky grin and a hand delving back in the tin for more biscuits. Hilary slapped the hand away affectionately, before removing the source of temptation to the windowsill. 

"It's not good for you, you know," she said. "All that sugar and no exercise."

This just earned Hilary an even cheekier look and the comment "I wouldn't say I get NO exercise at all ..." 

Hilary looked puzzled for a moment then chuckled. 

"Well, fair enough you do get a bit of exercise that way! But you still ought to do more outside exercise you know, it's good for your heart... What? Oh really, you are incorrigible!!" she exclaimed, as all she gained for her suggestion of outside exercise was a wicked look and mock innocent suggestion that surely there were laws against that kind of thing. Hilary was still quite young, and couldn't help going red as she realised what her comments could have implied to a dirtier mind than her own.

She was quite concerned, however, and wasn't going to be distracted from her original point. "You know perfectly well what I mean!! We should go for a run more often... Or a walk then!" she amended, seeing the pained expression that the suggestion of running as leisure had caused. 

"Hmmmm. Well if you really are that worried about me getting plenty of exercise, I still have a little time before my next tutorial ..." was all the reply Hilary received just then. 

For a moment, Hilary thought the lecture had worked, that they might make it out of the bedroom for a walk or run. But it soon became very clear that that was not the plan intended. Hilary had to laugh, even as she looked slightly nervously at the clock. 

"You have a one track mind, d'you know that?" she chuckled. "We have to be quiet though, Joey will probably be home soon, and I'm not quite ready for that conversation even if you are!"

Joey herself woke a little later feeling refreshed, but a little unsettled after complicated dreams involving Hilary, Jack and Rosalie, and giant singing cups of tea auditioning for her potential part in the show. 

She made her way to the kitchen and found a hastily scrawled note from Hilary. 

'Had to rush, late for tutor session at college. May be a while before get back tonight, don't wait for me to eat. Hope audition went well? H xx ' 

Joey was glad for a little longer alone to get her bearings around the new aspect to thinking about Hilary, and decided to go out and treat herself to a meal, and possibly a show if there were any late tickets going. 

She took her music and lyrics with her and boarded the train into the centre. Just as she was about to exit at her usual stop for the west end, she suddenly had a thought. She needed to be able to do a cockney accent. The accents around her were generally similar to her own, or belonged to foreign visitors. She ought to explore a little further afield in London. She studied the map, trying to decide where to go. She was still a little confused as to how all these coloured lines on the relatively new Underground map from Mr Beck actually married up with the geography of London. 

Joey decided in the end on a destination right in the centre of the East End, and set off to change lines, quite excited by her little adventure. She wouldn't stay long, she needed to get back for an early night to be fresh for the next day's audition. But it would be worth having her meal surrounded by real cockneys, to give her more of an idea of how Sally Smith might talk. 

She was slightly put off by appearance of the area she had chosen at random, she realised that an irrational part of her had been slightly expecting enthusiastic welcome from cheeky friendly people. She told herself off, after all that was no more likely than there being pearly kings and queens on each corner. 

The streets near the station were quite run down, and the few people she did see around did not look hugely friendly. It was coming to the later part of the afternoon, and the light was beginning to fade, which didn't help her feel any more secure. She began to wonder if she ought to have stayed in familiar surroundings. 

She told herself off for being nervous, not everywhere would be as well maintained an area as the theatre district. She spoke firmly to herself about not being so silly, set her shoulders and headed off along the road to find somewhere to eat. 

She was just trying to decide between two cafes, standing outside one reading the menu, with her back to the road, when she was suddenly grabbed by the shoulders and spun round. She gave a gasp and tried to wrestle her way free, but the hold was strong, and there was nothing she could do to escape.

She turned, frantically trying to work out if she could kick or knee her attacker anywhere to make them loosen their hold, but the face that she saw as she did so made her stop fighting and cry out.

"Jack ! What are you doing?!"

Seeing that she had recognised him, Jack loosened his hold. She spun to face him and hit him on the arm, before asking.

"Whatever happened to just saying hello?" she said fiercely, about to hit him again for giving her a shock, before noticing that he had another man with him.

She turned towards the young man, giving Jack a haughty look clearly intended to make him behave and introduce her properly. He grinned and waved towards his companion with the arm that wasn't preparing to defend himself from further onslaught from Jo

"Dr Phil Graves, believe it or not! He's at a conference with me in a local hospital. Phil, this is Jo Bettany, my young, well ... semi relative, though no official connection! Russell's young sister in law - the author."

Joey shook the young man's hand politely then turned back to Jack.

"What were you playing at, Jack? You really scared me" she said, still annoyed.

Jack looked more serious.

"I meant to, Jo" he said seriously "This isn't a safe place for a young woman to be wandering around. Even we watch our valuables here, and don't linger on the streets. We wouldn't be staying here at all if it wasn't for the hospital being so close. Why on earth are you here anyway?"

Joey explained about the part, and the quest for cockney accent. Jack nodded but told her she needed to be more careful.

"There are plenty of places in the East End that are perfectly safe Jo. However this certainly isn't one of them. But as you are here, why don't you come with us for a meal, in a little nicer location?" he said. She was about to argue, but before she could say about the accent, which was clearly an obsession with her right now, he continued. "Still in the East End! Just a short walk away. You will hear plenty of cockney voices as we go, I am sure"

His companion, Dr Graves, had stayed quiet during this exchange, but grinned at Jo's indecision. She clearly wanted to be independent, but also wanted to come with them. He was curious about the relationship between her and Jigger Maynard. They were extremely comfortable in each other's physical space, but not related.

Phil wondered about the chemistry between them, feeling fairly sure that Maynard had mentioned a new young wife. This wasn't her obviously, but if he hadn't have said the "no official connection" Phil would have sworn that they were a couple.

Jo decided that Jack was right. Irritating as it was to have been caught out in a poor decision, the people hanging around this area did not seem friendly, and she was actually glad to have some friends around rather than making her way back to the station alone.

They walked off towards a slightly less dangerous part of town, chatting between the three of them. Phil Graves was intrigued by all of the things that Joey had already done, despite her youth, and they quickly felt as if they had all know each other for years.

Jo was full of her audition call back, and speculating wildly about whether she could get the part. She had them in stitches with an initially terrible cockney accent, which they helped her moderate to a more realistic one over the course of the evening. Musical Jo didn't need much to hear the differences in tone, and the only problem was stopping her from experimenting on local people with the accent. She was so caught up in the character that she forgot that she might appear rude, and the doctors had to calm her down on more than one occasion.

They saw her safely to the train and she waved madly from inside the carriage until the tunnel took the train from their sight. They laughed at her child like enthusiasm, and left to walk back to their hotel, hands in pockets and chatting easily as they went.

"She's a livewire!" said Phil, his voice near chuckling as he thought about some of Joey's conversation.

Jack agreed, and gave Phil some more details about younger Joey. Secretly Jack found Joey's excitability quite tiring now. He thought warmly about Rosalie, just as witty, just as fun, but also able to be calm.

He cared for Joey, she was like a fun younger cousin or sister that he wanted to look after. But Rosalie was an equal to him, neither more or less. He hurried his step, hopeful that he might be able to get time to telephone her that evening. He worried about her, the pregnancy was taking it's toll, coming so soon after their escape from Austria. He had been glad that she had agreed to stay with Jem and Madge while he was away.

Phil had gone quiet himself, and welcomed the quicker pace, as he wanted some time to think. He felt strangely lost without Joey's presence already, which was absurd on only one meeting. They had fallen into an easy camaraderie very quickly, teasing Jack for his more sedate approach to things. Phil was only just qualified, and far closer to Joey in age than Jack, and he found Joey's tireless energy exciting to be around.

He wanted to see more of Miss Joey Bettany, that was something he was sure about.


	7. Chapter 7

Joey barely slept that night in her excitement, and arrived at the theatre a full hour early just in case. She was hugely nervous until the moment the audition started, and then true to form, she fell into the character, dancing and singing as if she had played the role for years.

She left the theatre in a whirl of excitement. They had told her that it was not possible for her to have the main part straight away, since the actress who played it was far more well known than she was, but that there was to be a gradual changeover to allow the current leading lady to take a break for a few months. So she officially had the small part as a one of the chorus, but would be trained as the understudy for the main part, and would play that part at least once a week to begin with, then probably more often as time went on until the star went on her break.

She knew that there was a risk, that she could end up forever understudy, never star, but at present Joey was just too thrilled to have a paying part of any kind that she felt as if she was floating on air.

She felt as if she would burst if she didn't find some way of celebrating, but she didn't really know anyone in town except Hilary and a few of Hilary's friends. She made her way home, hoping desperately that Hilary would be there.

Once back, she came within inches of bursting into Hilary's room again to share the news. Just in time she remembered to knock, and was rewarded by Hilary opening the door, anatomy book in hand and a questioning look on her face.

"I have the part!" Joey exclaimed, grasping Hilary's hands and nearly knocking the heavy book to the floor. Hilary chuckled and put the book down, before grabbing Joeys hands again and then joining a victory dance around the flat. They collapsed laughing into armchairs and Hilary asked for more details. She nodded at the fact that it was only an understudy part, but it was a start. She was glad for her friend, it was clear by how Joey came alive when acting and singing, that she was born to do this.

Joey was so happy at finally getting a start that she wanted to go out and celebrate. Hilary gave a wistful look at her textbooks, she had hoped to get some more revision notes done that day so she had time free later on.

But Joey rarely asked much of her as flatmate, and so she put on a smile and suggested that they go out to a local social club. Several ex Chalet School girls were studying or working in London, and they had a good chance of bumping into others they knew there.

Joey had been surprised by how many people Hilary seemed to know, and realised that the young woman was a favourite at the club. The pair had a great night out, returning to the flat with a collection of friends in tow, Joey entertaining them all with sudden bursts of song and dance.

The group who return with them to the flat were a mix of local friends and ex Chalet School girls. Many of them were also ex St Scholastika girls, by nature of Hilary having spent most of her school days in that school. Joey knew many of them by sight but was a little hazy as to names.

The girls had initially been welcoming but slightly wary of Joey. She had always been a fun character to have around, but she had also been part of the Chalet School teaching staff, and knew many of their parents, so they were cautious to begin with around her.

By the end of the night they had lost their shyness and realised that the Joey they had known was very different person from this Joey. She herself was amazed by how much difference a year or so out of school could make in them. They were so confident, sure of themselves.

Her own friends had left school and followed quite strictly defined paths, mainly to becoming wives and mothers. This next generation were more independent; Or perhaps it was the location, being in London.

Joey had fallen off the current conversation somewhat, so went to the kitchen for a moment, then backed out hurriedly.

Someone (she thought from the look of the hair that it was Mary Burnett) had obviously taken advantage of the relative privacy to sneak off for a moment with one of the young men.

It was an innocent enough embrace and kiss, but Joey was again faced with the fact that people she had grown up with were clearly starting to pair off. She waited a few moments, then deliberately knocked the table as she went past, to warn them. As she entered the kitchen for the second time, the young man was leaning against the back door, while Mary was busying herself with the kettle. Joey suppressed a smile and added her own request to the drinks that Mary was making, then took pity on the pair and left the room again.

Back in the living area, Nancy Wilmot was bemoaning the need for 9.30 lectures, and being laughed at for her laziness by the rest of the group. Hilary was perched on the arm of a chair shared by two of the young men that Joey didn't know, as she teased her friend for her sloth like qualities. Joey looked curiously at the group. She couldn't remember enough of Hilary's sleeping companion to recognise anyone, after all they had been thoroughly wrapped in the covers.

If she was honest, she didn't really think either of the men next to Hilary were her type, they seemed far too colourless. But until recently she wouldn't have said Hilary was on the search for a boyfriend at all, so she guessed that she was no great judge of what might suit the younger woman.

The party went on till the early hours, and Joey thoroughly enjoyed being surrounded by people her own age for a change. She had got so used to the late hours of the theatre, that the even later hours of these students were no issue to her.

Finally the revellers left one by one. Nancy Wilmot was the last to leave, despite her bemoaning her need to get up early the next morning. Joey was beginning to get tired, but determinedly stayed up with Hilary and Nancy till the plump young woman decided to leave.

Joey went yawning to her bed, still smiling at the thought of her new job, and meeting all of these friends that she hadn't known lived nearby. She was asleep as soon as her head touched the pillow.

Had Hilary known this, it might have saved Nancy a few bruises. Wary of waking Joey by opening the door, and despairing of her going to bed so they could slip off to Hilary's room by the normal route, the pair had worked out a whispered plan for Nancy to come around to Hilary's window, and be let in there.

"Oooof!" said Nancy, gingerly feeling around her middle. "That window sill has some sharp edges! I feel most battered"

"You should do some exercise, then you would have muscles there, not flab" came the unsympathetic reply. Nancy grimaced at her friend.

"Such love I get from you!" she grumbled in the low tone that they had all learnt early on travelled less easily than a whisper. "Remind me why I risk missing vitally important lectures for some time alone with you again."

"No idea, I'm afraid" said Hilary, carefully jamming a chair under the door handle and turning back to grin at her friend. "I'm inclined to say it isn't me at all, you actually have unnatural attraction to my biscuit and chocolate stash, judging by most of your activities in this room."

Nancy simply stuck her tongue out at Hilary, then continued to examine her bruised midriff. Hilary took pity on her and came to check that no splinters had hurt her, for Nancy was looking most woebegone.

"Nothing there but some bruises," Hilary said finally, then gave a few kisses to the area to make it better. Nancy smiled at the gentle kisses, but looked no less worried.

"What's wrong, love?" said Hilary, starting to get concerned.

"It's just..." Nancy said, not quite looking at Hilary. "I'm so tired, and I've had a bit to drink, and... Well I think I might not be up to ... Much ..."

Hilary let out a laugh, hastily hushed in case Joey heard, then pulled Nancy close.

"You daft bugger" she said into Nancy's neck. "I'm just glad to have some time alone with you after Joey unintentionally messed up our plans for a quiet night in. If you feel ok to stay, I'd like it, but if you want your own bed, thats fine too. I will resist the urge to pounce on you !!"

Nancy laughed, relieved. She and Hilary had been friends for a long time, but had only relatively recently realised their feelings for each other were more complicated. She wasn't used to a relationship yet, and had been quite worried about suggesting they just sleep together, in case it suggested to Hilary any rejection or lack of attraction.

Hilary further calmed her worries with a cheeky grin and "I shall expect twice as much ...er 'attention' another time, you realise" then followed with a more serious admission to being exhausted herself and quite looking forward to a night asleep together.

Nancy didn't make her early lecture the next morning, but as she woke to see the tousled hair and sleep warm face of Hilary beside her, she was completely contented about the fact of having to catch up on her studies later. She watched the still sleeping face and tried to resist the urge to move to stroke her cheek, knowing that it would wake her, and wanting Hilary to have a bit more sleep. She didn't have to get up now for an hour or so, so there was no rush to wake her up.

Joey slept soundly in the other room, and woke late. By the time she was out of her room, Hilary's door was open, her room empty. Joey sat down to a late breakfast still smiling over her successful audition, and planning how she would play the part.

\---

"Miss Wilson? Is Miss Joey Wilson here?"

Joey stood up and waved the hand that wasn't holding a script. A stressed looking young man with a notebook was looking around the main dressing room, and took a while to find her. 

"Ah Miss Joey Wilson?" he asked as he hurried up to her. "They need you to take the lead tonight, sorry for short notice, but we've only just found out she can't do it. Do you need help getting ready ?"

Joey shook her head, and hurriedly swopped costume to the one she wore when playing the lead role. Even as she did so, she wondered what was going on. The star had been less than welcoming, and tried to avoid Joey ever getting a chance to play anything but the minor part. Joey had had barely any of the promised regular slots as leading lady so far. 

But then this past week, she had had the emergency call to change three times. Something was going on. She determined to ask one of the other cast, see if they knew what was behind all of this, whether the star was ill or on strike. But for now she had to concentrate, to put herself into the part, so she did just that. 

After the show, she was still winding down in the group dressing room when she accidentally received her answer. The supporting players were gossiping among themselves, and freely discussing the star's absence. 

"Well, it's to be expected, isn't it" said one woman, as she carefully wiped off her stage make up. "After all, she is starting to show, and getting to a point where is is affecting her energy. They aren't going to be able to keep the secret much longer unless she starts her 'break' soon..."

The others nodded, as if it was obvious what was showing. Joey didn't like to ask, but concentrated on getting herself neat and tidy. Her instincts not to eavesdrop were battling with her curiosity, and she didn't quite know what to think. 

Thankfully for her, the conversation became clearer. 

"I still say the baby is his..." said another of the girls. "After all, most of us would be off the stage in disgrace, not being sheltered and given ways to hide what is going on. Her costume has been taken out three times in the last month" 

Jo understood at last. The comments about how 'busy' the star was now made more sense. She understood better the conditions of her being taken on, she was obviously meant to fill in for this woman during pregnancy. Whether she still would have a part after that was not clear. But after all, no one's part was ever fully secure. Joey could cope with the risk, it was part of the excitement. 

She packed her things away and said a friendly goodbye to the rest of the cast. They were nice enough people, but as yet they hadn't let her in to their groups. She realised that a lot of the theatre crowd had known each other since childhood, and a newcomer had to prove themselves to be accepted. Her failure to get auditions before made even more sense, for she wasn't a known entity, she had barely any experience compared to the least member of the chorus, and the fact of her limited experience being in America had made it hard to verify. She was thankful for the letter of introduction that had given her this chance. 

Back at the flat, she made herself a cup of tea and relaxed into a soft chair, winding down after the energy of the show. Her post from that morning lay unopened on the side table, and she began to open it, surprised to have quite a few letters for once. 

The first was from Nell Wilson, a nice surprise, for Nell was a terrible correspondent, tending to get her friend Con Stewart to write for both of them. 

Joey had a lot of affection for the woman who had become part of the school and San extended family, and settled into her chair more comfortably to read the missive.

Dear Joey, 

I hear that you are finally taking my surname in vain again, and have a part in Me and My Girl. Well done! I am reliably informed by more artistic types that that is one of the most popular shows in the west end at present. Very impressive. 

We are finally looking likely to be able to start the school again. Con and I have enjoyed our holiday, but we are more than ready to get back to work. 

I just hope that we get at least a few pupils back, it seems such a shame to have barely any after the numbers we reached in Austria. 

I do hope that we will get to see you at some stage. However I do know that Guernsey is a little far for you to come without a large break, and I would guess that you cannot have long off at this time. So we will have to be patient and wait until we can next visit London. 

Keep flying the Wilson standard high !

Yours, 

Nell Wilson

Joey smiled and put the letter down to answer later. 

The second was a note from Cornelia, thrilled that she was likely to be able to return to the school, and asking if Joey had heard anything about how Mademoiselle was. Joey put this with the other, feeling suddenly sad. Mademoiselle had been failing recently, and she knew enough about how doctors described things that it seemed unlikely she would recover. Joey made a mental note to ask Corney over to stay at some stage. Mademoiselle had taken the role of mother to Cornelia, and Joey wasn't sure whether many people knew that. She needed to prepare the girl for the worst. 

She stopped for a moment before opening the last one. It looked like Jack's handwriting and she feared that it would be the news of Mademoiselle's passing. 

Inside was not the news she had been expecting, but the fact that Jack was worried about Rosalie and the baby. They had made the decision to move to the mainland, and would be based in Jack's family home of Pretty Maids until they decided where to move to finally. 

'Jem is refusing to see the risk in having the San so close to the continent' Joey read in Jack's near illegible scrawl. 

'I have had to make the decision to leave the San for now. I have to think about my new family's safety, and it has made things quite awkward, for I think Jem feels let down that we are not staying with the San and School. 

I do hope Joey that you will understand, neither I nor Rosalie want to lose our connection with everybody. But after everything I saw on our escape from Austria, I know that I will want to sign up to fight as soon as there is a war, and I feel that there has to be a war. All of the signs are pointing that way. 

Rosalie is pregnant again, although only in very early stages. So far the signs are good. I am sorry that we didn't tell you before about her losing the previous baby, but there was no way that we could even talk about it between ourselves, it was too great a shock. So perhaps you will understand why we just can't take any risks with this one. I could have to leave at any time, and much as your family are caring, their own family has to come first. At Pretty Maids the situation is not ideal, but I can stay at home when conferences come up, merely travel for the day. 

I enclose a note for you. I don't know whether you will remember Phil Graves, but ever since our night out in London he has been pestering me for your address. I didn't like to give it to him, for although I feel him to be a good man and a great doctor, I really don't know him well enough personally to be sure if he is an appropriate friend for you. I thought the best thing to do would be to pass the note on, and let you decide if you wish to correspond with him. 

We wish you well with everything. If you get a chance to come to visit Rosalie I know that it will make her very happy. She is feeling Jem's disapproval of our actions deeply, after all she has been made almost one of your family ever since she went to work for him.

Madge has been very good and really looked after Rosalie, ignoring Jem's attitude and assuring her that the secretary 's post is still hers if we ever return to live nearer the school. She even admitted herself that she wondered whether the school might have to move, but as yet she is having to hope that it won't, and go along with Jem's insistence that Guernsey is safe. 

Nell Wilson has been a great support, and in fact offered her cottage as a place to stay. If life with Bob and Lydia proves too awkward we may well take her up on that offer. 

Look after yourself and good luck with your career as ever,

Jack & Rosalie.

P.S As I finish this letter we have had to come to the conclusion that Pretty Maids is not to be. Lydia's grief over her own son is too great, and so if you do wish to visit, we will be at Nell Wilson's cottage. She is heading off to Guernsey to rejoin the school! She says that she wrote to you last week, but had not as yet posted it, so I will prise that missive from her and get it posted along with this one. Rosalie tells me that you will not be surprised to hear that, apparently Nell always has been a terrible correspondent! 

Joey reread the letter, and decided that she would make the time to visit Rosalie as soon as possible. The rumours flying around London seemed to confirm Jack's fears that there would be a war, and she could understand his reluctance to leave a young pregnant wife in a high risk area. 

'Damn Jem and his stubbornness', she thought. She could understand his reluctance to leave the islands, but he ought to understand that Jack was not just a young single doctor now. She was glad to hear that Madge was managing to start the school up again, but was quite worried about the risks to them all after Jack's letter. She shook herself and told herself not to be so worried. After all there was France in the way between Germany and Guernsey, and she was a strong nation. There was no reason that Hitler's reach would get that far. 

She turned finally to the note enclosed within Jack's letter. A strong hand, and a more legible one than her old friend's, though barely. 

'What is it with medical people and their inability to write clearly?' she mused, holding the note up to the light to decipher the message.

Dear Miss Wilson,

Jack Maynard insists that I communicate in this way, and warned me that you might not be willing to correspond with me. But I do hope that you will be willing to reply, and agree to meet with me in person. 

I have been thinking of you ever since our evening in the East End, and I feel that we could be good friends. I am based now at a hospital in East London, and would very much like to see you again. 

I enclose the address of my lodgings, and I do hope that you will reply. My sister has agreed to act as a chaperone should you prefer, she is a nurse in the same hospital, my younger sister is also training for a medical career - we are a most one track family! 

I do understand Maynard's protective reluctance, but I do assure you that I am quite harmless ! I hope that I can prove that to you if we do meet up, with or without my sister present. 

I wish you all the best and hope that you remember our meeting favourably enough to give me a chance for a second one. 

Yours sincerely , 

Phillip Graves 

Joey had to laugh at the formal language, but she had enjoyed her time with Phil and Jack, and a new friend would be nice. She guessed from Jack's caution that Phil wanted more than friendship. 

Although she herself was still not hugely concerned about finding a man, she did wonder whether she ought to at least give this Phil Graves a chance. It might be that she would feel more for him once they had got to know each other. 

She got out her writing materials, before she had a chance to change her mind, and wrote a short reply arranging to meet for a meal the following week, if Phil was still interested. 

\---

Phil waited nervously by the stage door. Joey had told him to meet her there, but as he stood amongst the other admirers he couldn't help but feel strange about it. He felt it made him appear simply a fan of the actress Jo Wilson, rather than a suitor of the woman Joey Bettany. He twisted the stems of the flowers he was holding and hoped that she wouldn't be too long, resisting the urge to tell the doorman "I knew her before she had the part. Friend of a friend, you know"

They had already met a few times with his sister present, and then alone together for lunch. This was their first evening meeting and he felt as though it were their first real date. He wanted it to go perfectly, although he knew that Joey was not the type of girl who would be put off by silly details. Still, he wanted it to be as good a night out as he could manage. 

Inside Joey was looking forward to an evening out with Phil. He was fun to be around, and it was quite nice to receive the message "A gentleman waiting for you, Miss Wilson" from the doorman. The other girls in her dressing room looked at each other significantly, having teased Jo before for seeming to have little interest in men they were intrigued now at this new development. 

Jo was finally ready, and met Phil happily at the door, ignoring the giggles and obvious bunching together of some of the younger cast to stare out of the door after them. Phil was rather bemused by it, but decided it must be nothing, for Joey wasn't reacting. 

They had a good meal, and Phil insisted on accompanying her home. He had expected a goodbye on the doorstep, and was merely hopeful for a kiss, so was rather taken aback when Joey invited him in for a drink. He looked around the street rather nervously, this was not typical behaviour from girls he was used to, and he worried about gossip. But the street was dark, no nosy neighbours appeared to be present, so he entered the flat, intrigued as to where this was leading. 

Joey had missed his reaction. She was thinking of him as being like Jack or Gottfried, both of whom she would invite in as a matter of course. The fact that there ought to be a difference between the way she would act around those men that she had grown up with, and a newer acquaintance was something that had never crossed her mind. Phil had been introduced to her while with Jack, therefore he was a friend like Jack. She supposed that he counted more as an admirer, but after all, so had Jack once upon a time. 

She busied herself making tea, again surprising Phil, who had expected a drink to mean an alcoholic drink. But he was happy with tea and a little more of Joey's time. They settled down to talk, Phil wondering all the time whether a move to getting a bit closer would be appropriate or not. As the night drew to a close he realised that she had no idea of the implication of asking her in, and simply kissed her goodnight on the cheek as he left. She was so young in many ways, and he wanted to do everything as carefully as he could, not rush things. 

This became their pattern very quickly, and several times Phil would met her, they would have a meal, then return to the flat and talk until the early hours. 

Joey was happy in this routine, enjoying the companionship, not really thinking of where they were going. One day however she was shocked to over hear one of the neighbours in the local shop talking about her and the man she had in with her until all hours. She realised that people were assuming their activities to be far from innocent. For a brief moment she considered stopping the visits, then the rebel in her decided that it would do no good anyway. People were already gossiping, she knew the truth, as did Phil. 

That evening however, she found herself wondering, thinking about Phil as a man rather than as a friend. She found herself looking at him in a different light. Whether it was just rebellion and thinking that if she had the reputation she may as well deserve it, Joey didn't know. 

But she found herself wondering whether she was missing out by assuming that she would wait until marriage. She didn't want to marry yet, possinly not at all if she was honest. But Phil was a nice man, he clearly liked her, and she trusted him. Perhaps... Would it be as great as everyone seemed to think? She wasn't sure whether her mixed emotions were making her irrational, or if it was real feeling for Phil. 

The evening wore on, and Joey found herself wondering more and more. But she wasn't sure whether she would be being too forward to move things on in this way. She had only experience of men as friends, she just didn't know what was normal. Was Phil preferring their easy friendship? Or would he like more too? Would he assume that progressing in this way led to marriage, or would they still be able to continue as they were? 

It was late, getting to the point that he normally would leave, and she still didn't quite know what to do, or even what to think about it all. She went out to the bathroom, and paused for a moment outside Hilary's room. She was tempted to ask her friend for advice, although unsure how to start. 

She went to knock on the door, then jumped away as if scalded, as she heard unmistakable sounds from within of two bodies on the rather old and creaky bed and muted sounds of voices from within the room. She hurried back into the living room, cheeks flaming, then excused herself to the kitchen to make more tea.

In Hilary's room, Nancy had managed to wrestle the newspaper from Hilary and was holding her away with one hand while checking the print carefully. 

"Ha!! I knew it, you WERE making up the questions! ... And I WAS right about where the source of the Thames is, you horror!"

Hilary chuckled as she changed her means of attack and tickled Nancy until she got the paper back. 

"Well you were being so insufferable about getting so many questions right! Just because whoever wrote this quiz seems obsessed with geography and maths questions ! You ..." 

She was cut off in this by Nancy retaliating with the tickle fight, and returned the favour with a will, before recovering the paper from the floor and carrying on with the General knowledge quiz. "Though I still say it is hardly General Knowledge," Hilary still felt the need to remark. "These quizzes always seem to be far too one sided. It's either all sciences or all arts." 

"Or all Games or sports!" Nancy put in with a smile. Hilary laughed and pronounced that those were the best types of quiz, and sport SHOULD be general knowledge, before snuggling against her again to read out the questions properly this time. 

Joey didn't know quite what to think. She had her answer in a way, Hilary was clearly not going to judge if Joey had someone in her room, and she did like Phil. She looked at him again, and made up her mind. He was too nice a man to push her, she would have to make the running. 

Slightly clumsily, she sat down right next to him for once, surprising him with her closeness. He was not slow to respond however, as she moved in for a kiss. The fact of Joey moving their relationship on was no less welcome for being unexpected, and he didn't object at all as after a while she suggested a move to her room. Joey had decided, and once she had decided upon a course, she followed it. 

\---

The following morning Hilary wandered into the kitchen in her night clothes, only to find Phil in there leaning against the counter while Joey made tea and toast. Hilary gabbled something incomprehensible and hurried back to her own room. Joey was determined not to hide the situation however, and followed her to her room at the same time.

"Hilary, I know you've had a man here, he might even still be with you, and this is silly. We are both adults, now you know about Phil, tell your own friend that he can come out, have some tea and toast ..."

In her own battle against embarrassment, Joey had verbally jumped in with both feet, and was determined not to have any more secrets between them as room mates. It wasn't until she was actually stepping into Hilary's room after her that she all of a sudden realised it wasn't a man who was there. 

"Joey !" Hilary hissed, "At least shut the door, your... Phil, he's right behind you!"

Phil jumped back, suddenly realising that he had followed Joey on the spur of the moment, but was now not only nearly in the bedroom of a woman he hardly knew, but looking at another woman half awake and barely covered by the bedclothes she grabbed around her in her confusion. 

He took Hilary's words as a good excuse to leave this awkward situation, apologised , said his goodbyes and hurried off to Joey's room to get his coat and keys. 

On his passing back through the hallway the door was shut. He listened but couldn't hear anything that sounded like they were arguing, so decided he was best to let them sort themselves out. He scribbled a note for Joey saying that he would see her tonight, and to let him know at the hospital if she needed him before then, and left, shutting the door loudly so that they would know he had gone. 

Inside the room, Joey had yet to recover enough to speak. Nancy had at least managed to get a few more of the covers around her, and was trying to get Hilary's attention to get her to throw her some clothes. Hilary however was too distracted by Joey knowing their secret, and also by finding this man in their kitchen. 

Eventually Nancy realised that Hilary was blind to her frantic sign language and had to speak. 

"Not to seem too fussy, but I'd quite like some clothes?"she said, her voice sounding very loud somehow. "I feel somewhat at a disadvantage, and if there is going to be a fight I want to be able to referee without having to wear an impromptu toga" 

Hilary came to her senses and threw Nancy a dressing gown, while Joey looked at the speaker in a daze. 

"Nancy Wilmot! It's you, I didn't realise..." she said vaguely, then frowned. "Fight, why would there be a fight... Oh my! Hilary I am so sorry! I'm in your room, and I ... Tea and toast and I ... You... I didn't mean to barge in..."

Hilary and Nancy visibly relaxed, filled with relief at Joey's words. The fight Nancy had been anticipating, with words like 'Hellfire', 'Sin', 'misguided', and then threats of exposure seemed unlikely, given Joey's apologies and confusion. 

"You know, I just wanted to burst out laughing" said Nancy to Hilary later. "she sounded as though the main concern was that she hadn't offered us tea and toast!"


	8. Chapter 8

Joey lay on her bed, head still whirling slightly with all of the new information. She had been unable to process to begin with, that Hilary and Nancy were actually together in the same way as she and Phil. It had amazed her to realise that she knew them so well and hadn't known what was going on until now. They slept together, and appeared to be physically intimate together, not just great friends. Hilary described it as 'The same as you and Phil, Joey, just that... Well we are both female obviously so it's a little different in some parts I assume ..."

In fact, if Joey was honest, she was having some trouble registering that she and Phil were together that way. She had enjoyed the closeness of the previous night, and cared a lot for Phil, enjoyed his company. But she was all confused about what it might mean for her future. 

The actual initial experience had been a rather awkward fumble for the both of them, neither hugely sure what they were doing, or whether they were hurting the other. They had ended up at one point nearly falling off the bed, which had been a blessing in disguise. In the laughter that followed this, they had relaxed more with each other, seemed to know what they were doing better. Joey had had fun, and she guessed Phil had too. 

Did this mean that they were a couple? Did she have to check with him now if she wanted to do something, would he expect to see her everyday? More worryingly - would Phil expect to get married at some stage? Could Joey cope with being a doctor's wife, and all of the sacrifices that would entail? 

She had seen Madge, Rosalie, Gisela and many other friends marry doctors, and a large amount of their lives ended up controlled by their husband's responsibilities to patients. She wasn't sure that she could give her whole self that way. She still wanted to travel, to write, to be on the stage. That would never fit around marriage and children, she was sure. 

As well, she was confused, not really sure what she felt was strong enough, was really love. Hilary and Nancy had looked at each other with such protectiveness and attraction, and Joey could see that in Phil's eyes too, already. 

She just didn't know if she could feel that back. She cared for Phil, she liked spending time with him. But surely if she cared that much she wouldn't already be feeling panicked by the idea of a future with him? She had no one she could really ask without the situation becoming common knowledge, or risking Phil finding out about her doubts. He was such a good man, she didn't want to hurt him. Perhaps that was love, wanting to spend time together, not wanting to hurt the other person. Joey didn't know. 

Joey was worn out, and still had to rest before going back to the show, but her mind kept turning over and over, until eventually she slept.

Phil went through his tasks that day in a happy dream. He had not expected the previous night to happen, but he had already decided that if Joey would have him, he wanted to marry her. So her choosing to sleep with him felt as though perhaps she felt the same. He wondered vaguely whether he should go and look for a ring, take her somewhere nice and propose. But he had his sisters to help support, and was still finalising his training. Could he afford to get married yet? Would Joey accept a long engagement? She might, after all she was an understanding type of girl. 

Phil continued in his daydream, and looked forward to seeing Jo again. 

Hilary tried to concentrate on her books, but the shock of discovery that morning still preyed on her mind. Joey hadn't been disapproving, but she had seemed quite shocked, and Hilary was quite scared that Joey might talk about her and Nancy to other people they both knew. 

Although she was proud of being with Nancy, not ashamed herself, people were often strongly opposed to same sex situations. She wasn't 100% sure whether their activities were theoretically illegal, although she thought that was only with men. 

If she was honest, she was still coming to terms with the idea that her life would not follow traditional routes, that she wouldn't necessarily marry and have children. The war and escape from Austria had made her be brave enough to risk this situation with Nancy. However she would be lying if she said that she didn't occasionally grieve for the compromises and need for secrecy that their lifestyle entailed. Her mind wandered as she thought about how she had ended up here. 

Being involved in the peace treaty and it's hiding had made her grow up very suddenly. School and dealing with naughty middles had suddenly become far from a priority, as had convention and social opinion. Hilary sometimes felt that she had failed the Peace League, not having been able to hide the papers. She often wished that Joey had been there to take charge, to be the figurehead. Hilary still had nightmares of that escape from Austria, and the risks they had all taken. 

When she arrived back in England, she knew quite soon that she had changed, that other girls her age seemed years younger in attitude. The risk and concerns she had about giving in to her feelings for Nancy had seemed so small compared to the life and death situations she had recently experienced. 

Hilary wondered sometimes if, without that experience, she would ever have dared risk her career and family, risk the rejection and condemnation from Nancy that could have happened if Hilary had been wrong and her friend was not feeling the same attraction. 

Hilary had also been completely amazed at the fact that Joey appeared to have slept with Phil. She had known they were friends, but Hilary would have put Joey Bettany down as one who would wait till marriage. She knew that it was the 30s now, nearly the 40s, and attitudes were changing, but this was one that in Hilary's experience was still important. Did Joey know what she was doing? Was she, was Phil, being careful?

Hilary had to laugh suddenly at the idea of someone like herself having to explain contraception methods to Joey, and decided that she would leave well alone. After all she only had a faint idea herself what needed to be done. Phil was a doctor after all, and Joey was clever enough to find out what she needed to know, Hilary was sure. 

\---

Despite Joey's worries, life went on much as before, except that Phil now stayed over a few nights a week. He did begin hinting at marriage, but Joey ignored this, and kept repeating that she was happy as they were, and not to think too much of the future just yet. She enjoyed their time together, but was secretly glad that Phil's work commitments meant they couldn't be together all the time. 

As it was she was getting busier and busier at work. The leading lady was soon to give up and go on her "break" and Joey was now playing the main part most days a week. 

All continued in a fairly comfortable rut for a while, until one day Joey arrived at the theatre to find the whole place in complete confusion. She asked what was going on, but everyone seemed to be too panicked to explain, and most simply pointed her towards the director and producer. Some however turned their back on her when she asked and refused to say anything. When she eventually reached the pair in charge, she was even more concerned, they were talking rapidly and looking extremely stressed.

"What IS going on?" demanded Joey, as more and more people seemed to be giving her either worried or angry looks. 

"Ah... Joey, um ... Miss Wilson. Yes, you will need to sit down I think." said the producer. "I have some news... it's about, well... have you heard of Television..." 

He explained, and Joey frowned in concentration. She hadn't really paid much attention to the recent developments, but she did know that people in entertainment considered it the next big thing, that soon many richer households would have one. She wasn't so sure, radio seemed much simpler and cheaper.

She brought her attention back to what the producer was saying. He had been approached by the BBC to broadcast the play, one of the first times such a thing was to be done. It was a great honour, but also a great responsibility. 

If the show worked, it would be a great thing for Me and My Girl. If it flopped on television, then the papers were likely to pick the story up, and they were likely to lose a large amount of potential theatre goers, could even have to close the show. 

Joey understood now the mixed reactions that she had got from the cast. The producers were wanting Joey to star on the day of the filming. They knew that it wouldn't be long before the original star would have to take her 'break', and if the show was a success it would be unhelpful her having a high profile. With Joey in the lead female role, any success could then lead to people coming to see her, and a longer run of publicity for the show. It made commercial sense to use her, rather than the more experienced actress, since Joey didn't have any skeletons in her cupboard as far as they knew. If it worked it would make the show even more popular, this mysterious newcomer with the beautiful voice. 

"... And if it doesn't work" the director had said to the producer in private. "We can blame her inexperience, takes the pressure away from us"

Joey of course knew none of this. She just knew that she was suddenly hugely unpopular with much of the cast and stage crew. They were a loyal group, and felt the original actress ought to get the chance for publicity. They also had not yet had much chance to know whether Joey was reliable, and they were afraid she would let the show down on the day, and risk all of their jobs. 

Joey didn't know what all the fuss was about. Not many of her family and friends had, or were interested in televisions, and she couldn't really believe that many people would make their decision whether to see a West End show based on something like a television broadcast. 

She looked at the producer and director, a little unsure why they had made such a fuss about it all. They seemed to think that she might refuse, or she needed support for the situation. She hadn't yet realised that the cast would take all this quite so badly, nor that she was risking her career if the show didn't work. No one would be keen to take her on if the show was a flop on the new medium. She wasn't particularly nervous about being broadcast, since she saw nothing special about it.

She agreed to do it, and the producers heaved a sigh of relief. If she hadn't, they would have been forced to use the pregnant original star, who was becoming unable to keep up, and who also could cause them all to be involved in scandal. 

Joey went to change, smiling as she normally did at people. Her smile dimmed slightly as very few smiled back, and people turned their backs on her, or worse called her a thief. 

She shrugged off the first few rude remarks, after all the cast had not been hugely friendly anyway, seeing her as an outsider, not one of them. Many of them had grown up in the theatre world, and saw her as a rich girl, playing at a stage career, so had always been less than welcoming. However as people who had previously been moderately friendly started to be unkind or refuse to talk to her, she couldn't help but let it upset her somewhat. 

The show was to be filmed the following week, and so Joey was now moved to permanently playing the lead role, so that they could iron out any problems before the television cameras arrived. The cast began to have a grudging respect for Joey as she performed well night after night, able to give this role far more than her previous tiny part as one of the supporting players. 

They began to trust that she wouldn't let them down, and even to whisper between them how much better she was than the original actress. However, many of the cast had been with the musical from the beginning, and so the sense that she had stolen the other woman's chance was still widespread. 

She left the theatre after one particularly trying day, feeling very low. It was hard to stay strong, and not let the nasty attitudes spoil the enjoyment of her work. She walked head down, and distracted, and didn't hear Phil calling to her. He had to tap her on the shoulder before she looked up, and he was shocked to see how sad she looked. She wouldn't say much, but he knew enough about the problem to guess that it had been more of the same. 

He cast around for something to distract her with. He had news and needed to share it with her, but didn't want to pass it on while she was so subdued due to everything else. He steered her into a park, thinking that perhaps the greenery and lack of city bustle might help her relax. 

All of a sudden, Joey let out a shout, and sped off towards a group of boys in a corner. 

"Leave it alone, you evil little ..." she was yelling, pushing right into the centre of the group. Phil followed, ready for trouble. The boys had backed away with the shock of this whirlwind in their midst, but were now making angry noises and telling her to mind her own business. 

"Cruelty like this IS my business" replied Joey fiercely, clutching a little bundle to her. "It's bad enough that you were all teasing the little soul, don't try to argue" 

Phil was quite waiting for aggression from the boys, but there was something so fierce about Joey, and so forceful about her not giving in to their threatening behaviour, that they seemed to all decide it wasn't worth the hassle, and after a few more insults, the crowd melted away. 

Joey opened up her arms, and Phil saw what had caused her leap into danger. A tiny retriever puppy looked back up at him, and Phil Graves was lost. He took it from Joey's arms and started to check it for injuries, while it licked his chin trustingly, then strained to be put down. 

"They were teasing him, hitting him and making him run between them, the little beasts" stormed Joey. Phil hadn't seen the events but could tell from tender points on the puppy's side the boys must have hurt him, caused bruises. 

They looked around for any sign of the mother or an owner. Neither was visible, the pup could be no more than a month or two old, and had no collar. They decided the best thing to do was take him to the nearest police station, but when they got there, the police were unwilling to take him.

"Without a collar, miss" said the desk sergeant. "We can't do anything. Looks like he's yours, unless you want to take him to the dogs home?"

They left the station, waking slowly, trying to decide what to do. Joey was distraught at the idea of taking him to the dogs home. She felt sure that he would be put down, or run away, and nothing Phil could say would convince her otherwise. 

"But I can't have a dog" she repeated, scratching the pup's ears as they talked. "Apart from the fact I can't have pets at the flat, I'm in and out at all hours. It wouldn't be fair. You're on call all hours as well, I don't know who could take him, but he needs a good home..." 

Phil saw his opening. "Well..." he began, "That's something I wanted to talk to you about Joey ... I won't be having such awful hours any more" 

Joey turned to him with a delighted smile. "Oh good! Have they given you a better shift pattern?" 

"In a way" Phil replied, now nervous "I've been offered a job in practice. A good one. And there would be a job for my sister as well. A senior nursing role. It's just ... It's a long way away, Joey. In Wales. I went for the interview before we ... got together, and I don't think I can back out of it now for at least 6 months. They are relying on me."

Joey was torn. She wanted to congratulate Phil, and although she would be sad not to see him, she was so busy right now that 6 months break might be quite a good thing. But she had a horrible feeling that Phil was heading somewhere with this conversation. She just wasn't ready, even close, to settle down and get married. She didn't even want to get engaged. 

The pup whimpered slightly, as she held him a little too tightly. She loosened her hold and stroked the little body. 

"I ... Er... Wondered if you... Whether you would consider" began Phil, and to Joey's horror he removed something that looked suspiciously like a jewellery box from his pocket. She searched her mind frantically for something to say, some way to stop him asking the question that she just wasn't ready for yet. She looked at the pup and had a sudden brainwave. 

"Here, take him" she said, thrusting the dog into Phil's arms, nearly making him drop the box. "I'll go and get some food for him" 

She almost ran towards a nearby shop, leaving Phil holding the soft furred bundle. Momentarily he felt irritated with the dog, then as it began it's licking of his chin in greeting again, he melted. 

"Women!" he said to the dog. "don't grow up, little one. They get more and more complicated with every year that passes." 

He waited patiently, and eventually Jo returned. They began to walk to the station, and then on to Phil's lodgings. Joey determinedly moved the conversation away from any talk of commitment or marriage. Phil was initially frustrated, then started to register what was happening. He decided he had to be more direct, he needed to know where they stood before he left. He made Joey sit down once they reached his lodgings, and asked outright. 

"Joey, I'm not asking you to come with me. I know your career is just starting, I'd never come in the way of that. But before you came along, my dream was to get a post like this, in the country, and still be able to support my younger sister. I will happily come back to London in 6 months if there is the faintest chance of us being together..." 

Looking at her panic stricken face, his heart sank. He thought he might have his answer, and he almost didn't want to add the final words. But he had to try. 

"I love you Joey Bettany, and I want to marry you. But - is that what you want? Or will want eventually?" he said, searching her face with his eyes, hoping for at least a possibility. 

Joey hugged the pup to her. She was so strongly reminded of her Rufus, still in Austria with little hope of escape. The fact of Phil going also upset her, though far less than the memory. That gave her the answer she needed. She loved Phil as much as she felt able, but it wasn't enough. 

"Phil, I ... " she began. "I do love you. But I... I just don't want to marry, to settle down, to be a doctor's wife. To be anybody's wife. I'm so sorry..."

Phil was hurting, but still slightly relieved. He was glad to know now, not to have a false promise and then find out in letters as the months apart went on, as many girls would have done. His sister had warned him again and again that Joey seemed too young, and too focused on her career to want to commit the way he did. She was seldom wrong, although he had hoped against hope that it might be the case this time. 

He held Joey to him one last time in a hug, eliciting a squeak from the puppy, and full start of tears from her. 

"Looks like it's you and me then, little one" he said to the puppy, bringing a tiny smile to Joey's face through the tears. 

"You'll take him?" she said, trying not to push him too much, but hating the idea of the puppy going to a dog's home. "Will there be room where you are going? Somewhere in Wales you said, didn't you?"

He nodded, not quite trusting himself to speak, and taking the pup from her as he did so. 

"Bosherton, to be exact. Quite a name, but it's a wonderful place. Lakes and lily pools, not far from the sea. I know the area, so it should be a good start for me, even without ..."

Joey got up, and hugged him again, making the dog complain strongly about these humans who seemed determined to make him filling in puppy sandwich. They laughed at the little protests, and Joey had to make herself leave, the little family-like scene was tempting her too much with her recent rejections at work. But she knew herself too well. If she married now, she would always be searching, not quite happy. She didn't want that life with Jack, and she still didn't want it with Phil. 

After she had gone, Phil busied himself with feeding and, at his sister's insistence, washing, the pup. He was hurting now, but also a tiny bit glad to be going with a clean break. It had been a wonderful time with Joey, but if he was honest, he already felt second to her career, even third if you counted her writing. He had a good friend in her at least, and had had a fun few months. He wished her well in his mind, and set his sights on his new life in Bosherton. 

\---

Joey threw herself into the preparations for the broadcast, gaining a grudging respect from the whole cast and crew. The television filming itself went off without a hitch, and the show became busier than ever. Soon all but those who had been very close to the previous star agreed that Jo was better, more real in the part. Her working life returned to a more even keel, and she began to smile again. 

She missed Phil as a friend, but she was so busy that she was slightly glad to have no one waiting for her after shows. She could stay as late as she felt she wanted to, or could go straight home rather than out to eat, if she preferred. In one of those ways that fate works, she found that creativity feeds creativity. All at once she felt bombarded with story ideas, and much of her day outside the show was spent in furiously scribbling the ideas down. 

In typical Joey fashion, she burnt the candle both ends, putting all of her heart and soul into the musical and into her writing. It didn't seem to matter any more whether the publishers wanted the book, she just felt that she had to write it. The words spilled out and all she could do was float along and try to control the stream of ideas as much as possible. 

There had been rumours of war now for some months, although Joey barely noticed with all of her own concerns. However, like everyone, she knew that it was seeming more and more likely, although it didn't seem possible that things really would degenerate that far. 

One day she was in the flat, getting some cleaning done with Hilary and Nancy, who had forced her to take some time off from writing. She had been initially irritated, the realised how much her head had been aching once she was out of her room and with the other two. They were all laughing together, Joey having a mock sword-fight with Nancy, feather duster in hand, when the news of an important announcement came on the radio. The three fell silent immediately as the Prime Minister's voice came crackling out. 

"I am speaking to you from the Cabinet Room at 10, Downing Street.

This morning the British Ambassador in Berlin handed the German Government a final note stating that unless we heard from them by 11.00 a.m. that they were prepared at once to withdraw their troops from Poland, a state of war would exist between us.

I have to tell you that no such undertaking has been received, and that consequently this country is at war with Germany...

The words seemed almost impossible to be happening. After all, the last war was meant to be the war to end all wars. They all had known of people lost in the war, they knew the realities of people's lives being torn apart. Hilary had herself been through ordeals already, the spying on the hiding of the peace league and then the escape from Austria, had seen what the Nazis and people led by them were capable of at first hand. She went pale and had to sit down very suddenly as they listened to the rest of the announcement. Nancy went to her, and held her close.

Joey couldn't quite work out what to think. She knew of the changes that had happened in Austria after she had left to go to America, but she still almost couldn't believe it. Those gentle people she knew, the many Austrians and Germans from the Chalet School and their families. They were now enemies, were now people that her own countrymen would have to attack, hurt, kill.

Soon, the beginnings of war were seem everywhere. Men and boys were preparing to leave for training. Nancy surprised them both by joining the WRENS, but she was determined to do her bit, to help the war effort the best way that she could. 

Joey herself had a shock to suddenly find Phil on her doorstep, even more so to hear that he had volunteered, was to leave for officer's training immediately. He was in town only to tie up some loose ends, and couldn't resist coming to see her. 

"They'll need doctors, and I'm young, fit and strong, I have to do what I can" he said. He was sure in his actions, proud to have useful skills, determined to do his part. It was only a brief visit, but she was glad that she'd seen him again before he went. They steered their conversation away from their own relationship, and had a good time, and it was with a strange mixture of pride and sadness that she watched him go. 

Joey was faced with a dilemma. The show was closing, after a successful run, and on the strength of her television appearance, she already had people interested in where she would go next. In addition, her enemy in New York had lost a lot of influence, and she was getting suggestions from old friends over there that she could return and would be likely to do well. 

However she just couldn't work out whether leaving like that, to America, would seem like deserting her own country. She remembered those terrible weeks when she had no communication from Europe. Madge and the rest of her family were now on Guernsey, so close to the continent. There were risks all around. 

She knew that it might be best for her career to go while there was still possible interest in her, but she just couldn't face the idea of something happening to people that she loved, and being so far away again, not being able to do anything about it. 

She was also getting back into her writing again, and the story ideas seemed to bubble in her head constantly. Perhaps she ought to put her singing career on hold, perhaps she was meant to be an author, more than a performer? Yet she loved performing. 

She felt torn in all directions, and kept swinging from one side to another, not sure what to do, what was the best route for her. Her active mind was overwhelmed with trying to work out what to do, such that she neglected her health, and began to suffer for her carelessness. Hilary was quite worried about her, since she seemed to be getting more and more tired and spending time ill in bed in a way that she had never done before. 

One day, after a particularly bad stomach illness seemed to be going on for weeks, Hilary decided to get help, since Joey clearly wasn't going to do so. She didn't want to involve Madge and Jem, but Joey needed someone to make her see sense. 

The only other people that Hilary could think of were Jack and Rosalie, so she contacted them. In response, a week later Jack Maynard appeared, took one look at Joey and told her she needed a complete break. 

She felt too poorly to protest, and it wasn't long before she found herself set up in the cottage, living in the spare room, and being made to rest. Jack wasn't happy with how long this illness seemed to be lasting, and determined to do some tests while Joey was with them. Her system wasn't strong, and she needed a break. 

The peace and quiet of Dartmoor, and the care of Jack and Rosalie helped Jo enormously, and the already strong friendship between the three became even closer. Rosalie and Jo were rarely apart, and Jo made the decision to concentrate on her writing for a bit. She had planned to go to Madge in Guernsey once she was more fit, after all Jack and Rosalie were a young married couple, she didn't want to get in the way. 

But before she could make her intentions reality, the School and family had to evacuate to the mainland, as did many of her friends. The risks were becoming too great. 

Nell Wilson and Hilda particularly had a terrible voyage across, nearly being sunk on the way, surviving purely due to the skill of the boat's captain. They wanted to go straight to the new location for the school, so Nell reassured the little group that they were welcome to stay in her cottage for as long as they liked. 

Madge was still in Guernsey, so Joey decided to stay a little longer. So it was to the cottage on Dartmoor that the letter came, forwarded by Hilary, along with others. Joey saw the postmark, and smiled, although it was an unfamiliar hand. Leaving the other post for now, she opened the letter. She let out a strangled noise and went so pale that Rosalie leapt up and came across to her in concern. 

Lily Cottage,  
Bosherton

Dear Joey, 

I felt that Phil would want you to know, even though you were no longer together....

Joey stared at the letter. She couldn't believe it. So early on in the war, there wasn't the preparation of experience, of the fact that others around had received this type of news. It was completely out of the blue, and brought the war into reality, and the human cost of the conflict suddenly crashing home to her. 

Phil was missing, presumed killed. The letter from his sister gave little hope, apparently he had been seen to be wounded, and it was only considered as missing because the body had not been found. 

Joey's life had turned upside down. She hadn't wanted marriage, or settling down, but a part of her had always counted on Phil being around, being available in need. Now, he was gone, she would never see him again. 

Missing, presumed killed. She wanted to believe it to be just missing, but Phil's sister seemed so sure, a friend had seen him go down. 

Missing, presumed killed. 

Rosalie caught her just in time to be able to lower the dead weight Joey had become to the floor, before running in to find Jack. Joey was hugely embarrassed to wake with them both hovering over her and tried to brush it off, not reveal her closeness to Phil. But she couldn't do it, and her friends soon knew of the relationship, it's end and now of Phil's loss. 

It was a surprise, for Joey had never seemed the type for an affair, she had always been determined that she would never marry. She had also seemed quite young, naive in this sort of thing, and both would have expected her to wait for marriage, not get involved with a man this deeply, and reject his marriage offer. 

Joey was extremely tired, and said that all she wanted to do was to lie down. Jack and Rosalie exchanged looks that promised a lot of discussion of this new information later. For now they both did all they could to make Joey comfortable, and eventually, she slept.


	9. Chapter 9

The news of Mademoiselle's passing brought another shadow to the little cottage. It felt strange to Joey to be hearing all of these things second hand, she had previously been so involved with everything to do with the school and family, now she was slightly on the outside. 

She became quite withdrawn, wishing that she had managed to go to visit Mademoiselle recently, although she knew that it would not have been practical or affordable. 

She was also missing the performing, the rush of adrenaline when she went out on stage. She was at that stage of writing where she was having to go back through and make sure that the storyline made sense, and it was not as distracting as when she was in full creative flow. 

"Oh blow, I've mixed their ages up again!" she said out loud, one morning. She and Rosalie had brought their respective tasks to sit beside the fire in Nell's cottage. 

Rosalie looked up, and smiled to see Jo frowning in concentration, apparently unaware that she had uttered her exclamation out loud. She went back to her mending, wondering internally quite how Jack could be so hard on his socks. It must be from being quite tall, she supposed. 

She felt a tiny kick, and rested her hand for a moment on her front. This pregnancy had gone so much better than the previous ones, but she felt absolutely huge now, and slightly wondered whether to get so many kicks was quite normal. Jack being a twin, and having twins in her own family tree, they had discussed the possibility of multiple births, and Jack was quietly hoping for a boy and a girl, as he had always been close to his own twin sister Mollie. 

Joey looked up at Rosalie's movement, and smiled. She was glad for her friend, and was doing all that she could to help Rosalie through the pregnancy. The peace after her hectic past few years was helping Joey to resettle herself, work out what she wanted from life. Being a wife and mother just wasn't one of those things that she aspired to, but she did love to see how well suited Jack and Rosalie were. 

"Did you get any further with a name?" she asked Rosalie, and her friend shook her head. 

"If it's a boy we're thinking Stephen John, and a girl we are thinking at present Margaret Helena, for Jack's sister, and also for Nell Wilson. I know it is silly, but I really think her offering us this cottage and being able to rest with less worry has made all the difference this time."

Jo nodded. "What would you shorten it to, do you think? Mollie? Maggie?" 

Rosalie wrinkled her nose. "Don't really like either of those, but we'll have to see. I almost feel like we will know when the baby... or babies, come. We seem to change what names we prefer every week at the moment. I tend to feel that the time comes, we will know." 

Joey nodded. "I find that with characters. They seem to sometimes just name themselves, and then that name IS them, if that makes sense" 

Rosalie nodded agreement. 

"Do you have any ideas for possible baby names we could use?" she asked, just resisting teasing Joey for her efforts when Jem and Madge were naming Sybil. 

Joey shook her head. "Not really, although I like the sound of Margaret and Helena. I've always quite liked Mary as a name, and actually Charlie's real name is another nice one. Constance. Would that be one you'd consider? Or would something more traditional, like Susan or Elizabeth suit?" she asked Rosalie. "I assume you wouldn't want to use your own name?"

They chatted away, oblivious to Jack standing in the doorway, looking at the two of them and smiling. He loved Rosalie deeply, but he still saw Joey as almost a younger sister, and wanted her to be safe and happy. He was glad that they were getting on so well. 

\---

Letter from Joey Bettany to Madge Russell 

Dearest Madge, 

I was so glad to hear of your safe arrival near the school. Now that all of you are safe out of Guernsey I can breath again. I do feel sometimes that an active imagination is a hinderance rather than a blessing on occasion.

The house sounds amazing, although I really can't quite work out what you mean by it being "Round"? I initially imagined a sort of tower, I have to say! 

I'm glad that you have managed to fit everyone in. I'd guess that you will be glad in some ways when the girls go back to school. I wish that I could help in some way, provide a home for Rob at least, but the only thing I can do is not require a room myself. 

Jack and Rosalie have asked me to stay and help with her pregnancy, and I feel that it's a good plan. I want to finish my book, and I really do need to build up my stamina before I get back into any new role. Thankfully the uncertainty with the war has meant that there is a delay in preparations for a few of the musicals that I've been offered, so I should be able to take this break now without necessarily losing those offers. 

Do get Rob to write to me here though, will you? Daisy too, I haven't heard from either of them for ages. 

I will stop here, as Jack is going into town so can post this for me. 

With much love,

Joey

Letter from Madge Russell to Joey Bettany. 

Dear Joey, 

I think your plan sounds like a good one. You really have been busy during the past few years, and you need to pace yourself. Having a bit of a break will allow you to work out what you want to do far better. 

I do appreciate the sentiment, and it is true that space is at a premium - but if you need us, or wish to return to live with us, we will always make room. I do miss my Joey-baba however much I am proud of you being so independent. 

It is hard to remember that you are now an adult, and less than a year from majority. I can't quite believe that it has been so many years since we first went to the Tyrol. So much has happened since then. I do hope that this war is over soon and we could look into returning. The reports all seem to think that the war will be over soon, but Jem is not so sure. It is rare that I have ever hoped for Jem to be wrong, but for so many people's sakes, I do hope he is this time. 

We have moved the school into Ernest Howell's house, and it does look as though we will get on very well here. I do wish that you were a little nearer however. His young sister Gwensi seems to be constantly at war with us, and so far none of us have managed to get her to cooperate. You always were so good with the younger girls, I feel that you would be able to reach her. The poor girl is going to make herself very ill if she continues this way. 

I have passed on your messages to Rob and Daisy, but I fear you may have some time to wait before you hear from Daisy. She is another slight worry. She is not really getting on well now with the other children here, she is too old to enjoy spending all of her time with them, but old enough to resent the fact that we cannot really give her much attention with so many younger ones around. I wish that I knew what to do for the best. 

Robin is trying to take your place as much as she can, but she is also not quite herself. She misses you and Rosalie greatly, and again we are so busy with the youngsters that we cannot at present change that situation. I think both of them will be happier once school begins. 

Corney is proving to be a godsend. She has been a very capable Head Girl, and she is also a slightly older person for Rob and Daisy to spend time with, but not as old as we ancient folk! 

Jem is trying to get Jack to rejoin the San, but so far with little success. I do understand his concerns for Rosalie, but now that we are all settled in Armishire it really would be a better situation all round I'm sure. I don't know if Jack or Rosalie talk to you about such things, but if they do, please do put in a good word for the plan. Even more than the fact that Jack is excellent at his work, we really had begun to see them as family, and it would be so much nicer if they could be near again. 

I know that they don't want to make any decisions until the baby is born (or maybe babies - Jem said that Jack is hoping for twins?) but they would be welcomed back here with open arms if they wanted to come. 

Take care of yourself, and we will let you know when we reach an organised enough state for visitors! 

With much love 

Madge.

Message from Joey Bettany to Madge Russell 

Dear Madge,

I will try to see about coming for a visit, but one suggestion I have - Ernest Howell's sister is about Daisy's age, isn't she? Why don't you kill two birds with one stone and set Daisy to helping Gwensi see the fun side of the school coming to her, rather than she having to go to school. 

I really am getting on very well with the book here, and I do feel that it is helpful for Rosalie to have me around, so I will not take you up on the offer of a place to live just yet, but thank you for letting me know that I would be welcome. I do feel very lucky to have such loving friends and family. Jack and Rosalie have been a great help in getting me back nearly to my old self. I won't be so silly as to get that run down again. 

I'm glad that Corney is doing well - I was so shocked to hear about her eye injuries after that pilot crashed. It does seem funny now to think of the awkward young terror that Corney was to begin with, and associate that with a calm and responsible Head Girl. I would guess that she can still provide some startling language if she were to try! 

I actually have some news of interest for once - I have been asked to join a group of entertainers being put together to go out and entertain the troops, to help morale. The plan is only in it's infancy, but apparently my television broadcast reached far more people than I thought, and - you honestly won't believe this - I appear to have become slightly famous! 

I didn't know at the time but apparently the publicity department of the show made up posters including one of me, in character. Well for some unknown reason, those posters and pictures, along with gramophone records of the show's score, seem to have become quite a craze with some of the soldiers. I really don't know why, for there are many other actresses who are far prettier - I'm not being modest, it is just fact, as you know. I have far more often been described as having "character" than looks ! 

To cut a long story short, it appears that this craze for 'Jo Wilson' has led to the government deeming me useful to the war effort ! 

Thankfully, unlike so many people, I do have some flexibility, as the show is still being worked out, so I should be able to stay here until a little after Rosalie's babies are due. You are correct that Jack is sure of twins, and I am now half convinced that he is right. I do hope that it isn't just one very big baby, we will find it hard not to be slightly disappointed at anything less than twins now! 

Jack is wavering on the idea of rejoining the San. Jem did say that there might be a suitable house there, and they do want to start putting down some roots. It does look as though they may well decide to move around the time that I would join the Army Entertainers, so Nell will finally be able to get her cottage back. I really can't believe that I have been here nearly 6 months now. Where has the time gone?!

Have a think on my plan - I'd bet that you will find that is the key - set young Daisy on the case, this Gwensi will find it hard to remain unimpressed with school life if I know Daisy! 

With much love to everyone there, 

Joey. 

\-----

Joey sat in her room and looked at the note from the publishers. It seemed that, without intentionally doing so, her writing had found that slightly tougher edge that her publishers were looking for, and their letter was full of praise for the manuscript she had sent. She was glad, for it had been a real labour of love this time, and she had been proud of it in a way that she hadn't felt since the very first book that she had accepted.

She turned to her other correspondence, and smiled to recognise Daisy's slightly erratic hand amongst the envelopes. Joey scanned the others to be sure that she had not missed anything of vital importance, then settled down to read her niece by marriage's letter, smiling slightly at the formal start.

Letter from Daisy Venables to Joey Bettany 

Dear Aunt Jo,

I hope that you are well, and that you will be able to visit soon. Please let Aunt Rosalie and Uncle Jack know that we miss them as well, and hope that they are also well.

The family is settling in nicely, although we are quite crowded. Our house is called The Round House, and it is round outside.

I am sorry that I have taken so long to write to you. I am well, although I am missing being in Guernsey. It is very nice here, but there are an awful lot of woods and trees, it seems very dark sometimes, but that is because the trees near the house need some maintenance.

The house for the new school seems to be a good location, Aunty Jo, and has lots more rooms than we will need, I am sure...

Joey couldn't help but smile as she detected phrases that sounded just like Madge or Jem, in among the stock phrases for how to write a letter to a relative.

Thankfully Daisy seemed to gradually relax, get more into telling her the news, and forget to be so formal. Joey missed her nephews and nieces, and she knew that Madge had been quite worried by how badly Daisy had grieved after the loss of her mother, Jem's sister Margot.

Margot - now that would be a pretty shortening for Margaret. Joey made a note to suggest it to Rosalie and Jack, for it would not be long now before the baby would be born, and if there were to be twin girls, rather than boy and girl, the decision had been made to split the Helena Margaret between them. In which case Margaret was long for 'everyday' use, so they had been looking for shorter options.

She returned to the letter, glad to see Daisy enthusing about her new friend Gwensi. It looked as though her plan for helping the two youngsters had been put into action.

... I was so excited, Aunty Jo, to realise that we had EXACTLY the same birthday. We are like twins, and when my friend Beth comes back to school I am sure that we will be great pals. Gwensi is going to stay in her own bedroom for now, but hopefully she will join in properly with school things now that she has realised that it has to happen.

We three could have such fun together. Beth is Dr and Mrs Chester's daughter, I don't think you met her much while you visited us a year or so ago, but she is ever so nice, and we are great friends. Aunty Rosalie always used to call us Trouble and Trouble two, can you tell her that she might have to add a Trouble Three to that? Or maybe think of new names for us.

Are you going to visit us any time soon? It seems such an age since we saw you, I was thirteen last month. And so, of course was Gwensi! We are hopefully going to be in the same form, although I didn't have a great report last term, so I don't know really what form I will be in.

The babes are being annoying now, and want to use the table for a jigsaw, so I will finish writing this letter and send it to you. It is good that we are safer here, but it is ever so crowded Aunty Jo, I will be really glad this term, for I am to be a boarder, and won't have to be a day girl and spend all my time with babies who don't let you finish things before they put jigsaw pieces everywhere.

With lots of love,

Daisy

Joey laughed at the obvious irritation in the last bit. Daisy was clearly growing up and finding being surrounded by young cousins a bit of a nuisance. It would be good for her to spend some time at school with girls her own age. Madge had confided in a previous letter that they planned to let Daisy have her wish and board, at least weekly, even though Robin and the younger ones were all to come home each day.

Joey daydreamed for a moment about moving to live near Madge, maybe with a little baby of her own, a girl that could go to the Chalet School.

But even as she drifted in the daydream, she could tell that it wasn't really what she wanted, and was reassured that her life decisions were the right ones for her. She felt stifled just by the idea of only seeing a small amount of people, of not traveling the world and experiencing all if the ups and downs that her choice of career might bring. It was perhaps a lifestyle some people would see as selfish, or unsteady, perhaps frivolous; But she knew that it was the right one for her.

\---

Rosalie lay back, exhausted. It had been a long day, and a hard one. The midwife had warned her this was common with first babies, but Rosalie hadn't really realised just how long the time would feel when in discomfort, then severe pain. She had almost felt unable to keep going at the end, but she managed it, and her tiny little girl was born. Then half an hour later, the contractions had begun again. 

She was tired now, deeply tired to the bone, but happy. She couldn't quite believe how fate had turned, from those terrible lost pregnancies, to suddenly having not only one, but three babies, three beautiful girls.

Jack sat by her side, gripping her hand. The whole process had just made him realise how precious she was to him, and he had almost despaired to be able to know that she was in pain for such a long period of time.

Soothed by his presence, Rosalie slept finally. He then felt able to properly go and see the girls. It was a real shock. He had been prepared for probably having two children, and given the past lost pregnancies had been glad to potentially have two at once, but suddenly he had three! 

He didn't know anyone with Triplets, and he was torn between happiness and panic. Their salary would have been tight with two, three would be even more so, and he knew that this made the decision for them. He would accept Jem's offer to return to the San, and move to Armishire. They couldn't afford live in help with just his wages, so having friends nearby would make a great difference.

A little part of him was sad, for he had really enjoyed the time with Rosalie recently without the extended family of the San and School nearby. Joey hadn't really counted, she kept to her room often, writing or editing.

However, as he thought of the work and costs involved in three babies, he felt that the close knit group would now perhaps be a blessing, for he secretly feared that he would be called up before long, and Rosalie's own family were very busy, and already in difficult financial circumstances themselves.

He moved aside the covers, and looked down at the girls. They looked very much like most babies did, but it was clear already that they would be similar but not identical. 

As Joey had said, the darkness of their eyes would help to tell them apart. Helena, with a beautiful grey, Margot with bright blue. Then, in another basket, for they had never expected to need room for three babies, there was little Constance, whose eyes were dark and deep, and who looked already to be darker in colouring than the other two.

He must have dozed off, for he awoke with a jump to find the light level much lower, the night fast approaching outside on the moors. Joey was sitting opposite, holding Constance, while Rosalie was being helped to feed Helena and then Margot. He coloured in embarrassment, this wasn't something he was used to; He wasn't sure whether he was supposed to be present or not.

"He wakes!" said Joey with a grin. "How does it feel, beating everyone we know hollow, now? Twins we have plenty of around, and we've all been warning people that they were likely, but Triplets really are something special!"

He smiled at her, and thought again how strong she had been. She had barely mentioned Phil since she had heard the news. He knew however that she had bad dreams, for she had woken them all many times. In an unguarded moment she admitted that she missed Phil's friendship, and wished that she had felt strongly enough for him to have married him.

"But I couldn't Jack, he is...was... too good a man to give him half measures. He deserved someone who loved him much more. I can't quite believe that he's really gone. He could be missing, these things do happen..."

However, as the months wore on without any word, she clearly came to realise that he was really gone, and nothing she did would change that. Jack was sad himself about Phil, but then glad to see her start to move on, admit her aspirations, her dreams of returning to America. He knew it was a good sign when she started to crave her past excitement, and the buzz of performing. It would distract her from everything, avoid her brooding on things.

\---

Joey sat downstairs, having to steel herself not to to up and help with the babies. Rosalie and Jack had gently but firmly said that they needed to start as they meant to go on, and she would not be around to help anyway for much longer. It wouldn't help anyone for her to become too involved at this stage.

She knew that they were right. Despite not thinking herself hugely maternal, she found it hard to resist cuddling the girls, and it would be hard enough as it was to leave. So she distracted herself with preparations for her tour. As long as she felt well enough, she was going to join them in a few weeks, although she would have liked to stay longer, now that the babies were here. She didn't want to outstay her welcome, and after all, Jack and Rosalie would be moving to Howells soon enough.

This tour was a completely new idea to her, and she was slightly scared, wondered whether she would really be strong enough, so soon after being under doctors orders. At the same time she was also excited, wondering where they would be going, what she would be doing. Above all however was the feeling of pride that she could be making a difference, could be helping those soldiers, like Phil, who were defending their country and way of life overseas.

She had been determined when she left the Tyrol that she would see the world, have an adventure, and the next stage of that was about to begin, although under far different circumstances than she would ever have dreamed as a young girl just out of school. Joey set her mind to preparations, and getting on with the next stage of her adventure.

\---

Rosalie looked up at the new house. It seemed so large after Nell's cottage. Could they really afford this? It was a lovely place, and near to the San and to the rest of the Chalet School extended family. Jack had made all of the arrangements, but she did worry about their finances. With only his income they just couldn't keep up with the Russells, and she did hope that he wouldn't try too hard to do so. After all, Madge had the income from the school, on top of Jem's salary. They were also older and more established, the COULD afford help for housekeeping and looking after the children. The size of the house, and the idea of looking after it all by herself was a worry, especially as she was still quite fragile after the babies being born. 

She looked at Jack, bounding up to open the door, excited by being able to show her the house, and decided to let those worries rest a while. It could well be that the house was not as expensive as she feared. She smiled at him as he bounced back, and he picked up the large baby basket with the Triplets in, grinning at her all the while. 

"Be gentle!" she said, with a smile to take the sting out of her words. "I know Joey took to carrying them around like so many puppies before she left, but there's no need to follow her example, you'll make them seasick !" 

He grinned at her and moderated his pace slightly. The triplets looked up at him from the big basket, and he had that moment of wonder again. These tiny little beings needed him, and depended on him. He looked back up at Rosalie and felt really lucky in his little family. 

"Come on now Mrs Maynard" he said to her, holding out his arm for her to get a little balance. "Let's get you and our three terrors inside, shall we? Welcome to Plas Gwyn, home of the newly expanded Maynard clan" 

-


	10. Chapter 10

Many miles away, Joey looked at herself in the mirror, amazed at the smart looking woman she saw there. It was odd to be back in a uniform, but it was also quite exciting, and a little frightening. The army style and colours made the whole thing much more real. For a moment she thought of Phil, wondered how he had felt the first time that he wore his own uniform, then pushed that thought away, not ready to go there yet. 

"Miss Wilson?" came a voice. "Er... Miss Wilson, is it?" 

Joey looked around for someone else, before suddenly remembering that she was back in the theatre world again, and 'Miss Wilson' meant her. She greeted the corporal and was directed to report to the camp office along with other members of the troop. 

She hurried along behind the efficient soldier, who seemed to be concentrating very hard on being busy and important, with her clipboard and fast confident stride. Some of the performers that they collected on the way looked a bit appalled at the rate of movement, and struggled to keep up. Joey smiled as she followed along. There were many things about the army that reminded her of being in Guides, so she focused on those memories to try to keep her behaviour appropriate, and to get herself into the rhythm of walking that quickly, almost at a marching pace. The others gradually fell into the pattern too, all good mimics, and not going to be outdone. 

Once at the Captain's office, they entered, and were introduced to several other members of the Entertainment Troop. Jo had to hide a smile, for she had never seen a more unlikely group of soldiers. Somehow most of the entertainers managed to wear their uniform differently to all of these intense, serious soldiers around them, unable to resist additions and subtractions to fit their own images and styles. 

It was a good mix, some actors and actresses, some comedians, but mainly singers like herself. On hearing that she could also dance reasonably well, the organiser grinned happily, for he had unintentionally ended up with far more vocal talent than visual. 

"All very well standing around and singing, but the boys out in the field need a bit more action too, and something to look at, too. They will be mad about a lovely young thing like you" he said, looking at her appreciatively. 

Joey was at a loss as to how to take this, such open admiration for her looks seemed forward and quite rude, but he was being friendly, so she left it for now. None of the other girls seemed to bat an eyelid at his gentle flirting, and she would come to realise that it was just his way of breaking the ice, nothing serious. Compared to many in the industry, she was soon to realise she had an attitude to some things that was considered quite old fashioned now. 

She was reminded of when she arrived in New York, and realised what a sheltered world she had lived in while in Tyrol. These women wore make up offstage as well as on, and seemed to be so confident. Joey felt very young and uninteresting next to them, completely unaware that her characterful face and good complexion made her look far more attractive. Had she but known it, the women were envying her her natural looks, and charisma, and many of the men were wondering how likely she would be to be interested in them.

They were briefed on the planned tour, and on the regulations that they would have to follow. Joey was used to boarding school routine, so was unconcerned by the restrictions on her freedom. Many of the others were grumbling for a long time after the meeting however, to her surprise. She had yet to realise that she was reasonably unusual in being a willing volunteer. Several of those there had been drafted, or directed by their publicity teams / agent to do this tour. They were many of them unwilling and scared, and grumbling went a small way towards expressing that fear. 

Even those there willingly were worried. The theatre and entertainment world was a fickle one. Logically this tour ought to boost their public profiles, while also giving them a chance to do their bit for the war effort. Still, there was always that slight concern that it was out of sight, out of mind, and 6 months was a long time to be away. However they were here now, so they each swallowed their worries and determined to make the show a good one. 

The rehearsals began, and acts were moved up or down the billing as the show was finalised and they set off for the actual tour of the war zones, split now across many countries. Joey was quite surprised at the first real show, to find herself reasonably high on the list; She really had no idea how much her recordings and picture had made her one of the forces 'sweethearts'. 

To begin with, the others were prepared for a diva, a woman sure of her worth and power. However Joey's level, friendly nature won them over, one by one. She was unselfish on stage, and dedicated, putting everything she had into her performance, and the theatre folk were quick to see her star quality, even if she herself did not. 

She, along with the troop, had been shocked by some of the conditions that the troops fought in, and the huge numbers dying to protect them. Back in Britain it had been easy to see the war as almost romantic, and nothing like as serious a business as it actually was. 

Joey was the undeniable star of the show, not least because she gave every minute to the soldiers, even outside of her working hours. She burnt the candle at both ends, unwilling to short change any of them from enjoying the little bit of colour that the troop brought into their lives. 

She buried herself in the work, trying not to be homesick for Jack, Rosalie and the babies. She knew that she would have gone mad, staying in that situation much longer, but it had also been familiar and comforting. As the tour began she was spending much of her time travelling, catching small amounts of sleep on the journey before arriving at the next location and putting on her best smile for the troops. 

The bit of the job that she hadn't expected was that they were always "on stage". The troops were so fed up with their surroundings, that they often crowded round as soon as they arrived, and she was introduced to the idea of giving autographs, and posing with them for pictures. She had to be 'Jo Wilson' nearly all the time, and was often to be found talking young soldiers about their sweethearts, older ones about their families, and still other about places they wanted to go, things that they wanted to do. 

Most of the time they moved on too quickly to see action, but then a stretch of visits coincided with an offensive, and all at once the war became even more real. Boys, for they were boys, even if their ages were not so much less than hers, were posing with her one day, then gone the next. 

Joey had to hold the sense of loss within, for she was determined that she couldn't let it get to her. If she did, she knew she would have to back away from the soldiers, not give them her all, for fear that they might not make it through another day. She channelled everything she had into her work. If their visit might be a soldier's last chance to laugh and be reminded of home, she was determined to make it a good one. 

From wanting to work in the beginning to distract herself from her personal situation, she now began to feel a drive, a need to do all that she could. She had to become harder to individual loss, to concentrate on the bigger picture, and she did so, enthralling audience after audience with her singing and dancing. 

\---

Rosalie sat back in her chair for a moment, closed her eyes and tried to relax. She was completely exhausted, and it was only halfway through the morning. The Triplets were generally good babies, but they did need a lot of attention. No sooner had one or two been fed, changed or dropped off to sleep, than the third needed attention and disturbed the others. It often felt like a never ending cycle of washing, cleaning, feeding and comforting. 

Jack had insisted on having a "Mother's helper" during the day, but Rosalie just couldn't bring herself to properly take advantage of the girl's presence. Vague unspoken worries about the cost made her determined to use her only when absolutely necessary. 

In her rational state, Rosalie would have realised that the woman was paid to be there, whether she worked or not, but the past few years of stress had finally come to the surface, along with the shock of suddenly being a mother of three. She wasn't naturally someone who externalised things, and so she simply set herself a target to cope with the babies, prove she didn't need help, and focused single-mindedly on that. 

She had never been plump, but now she started to lose weight, forgetting to eat enough in her worry about balancing the demands on her time. She slept poorly, and was constantly on edge. 

Jack was worried about her, but he was away at the San much of the day, and didn't realise that the mother's helper was barely allowed near the babies. He also knew that his call up must be coming soon, as the war stretched on with no sign of stopping. He wasn't sure whether he ought to join in more now with Rosalie and the girls, or step back, so that his absence was less of a shock to the system. 

He was also finding it hard to work out his own position in the San. His co workers had not understood him leaving before properly, had not known the background of Rosalie's lost pregnancies. They unfairly saw him as having deserted them at the hard early stage of setting up the San, and then moving it all to Armishire, then returning once the hard work was over. 

Jem was welcoming and glad to have him back, but Jack didn't know how to handle the situation. He felt the man to be a close friend, and until their argument when Jack had left, he had felt part of the Russell family. Now insecurities made him hold Jem at a distance, not ask advice in the way that he had done previously. He also knew that his call up must be coming soon, as the war that was supposed to be "Over by Christmas" stretched on with no sign of stopping. 

The situation continued. Rosalie became convinced that her babies would be taken away if she couldn't cope with them single handedly. She registered that her weight loss had alerted Jack to her not coping, and forced herself to eat, eventually asking the mother's helper to make her food, so that no time was lost from being with the babies. 

With her weight more stable, the outward signs of her not coping went away, although Jack was far from convinced that all was well. He was so used to Rosalie always being capable and talking to him about things, that he just had to do all he could to help her when he was at home, and keep hoping things would improve. 

He asked the mother's help how things were going, and did she need extra help, but she said no, as did Rosalie, so he was at a loss for what to do. 

Being young, and of a type not inclined to ask for extra work, the mother's help didn't want anyone else there to possibly give her chores. In her defence she didn't properly understand the reason behind the doctor's question, and it was honestly true that she was not busy or overworked during the day. So she carried along happily, and didn't tell anyone how little she had to do; After all, she reasoned, she had tried at the beginning to help Mrs Maynard all that she could, but there is only so often that you can offer and be abruptly rejected by your employer. She coasted and let Rosalie use her basically as an extra pair of hands to hold a baby occasionally, make a few sandwiches at lunch time and little more. 

Madge had been busy with the organisation at the school. The school secretary in Guernsey had stayed behind, since her own family lived there, so they were busy interviewing for the job, at the same time as getting on with the school term. Hilda and Nell were doing the office work at the same time as their own, and so rarely made it for a visit beyond their first welcome. 

When the school wasn't needing attention, Madge was distracted by Daisy, who was hitting the troublesome teens with a vengeance. The boarding plan had worked to begin with, but she missed Robin and Primula, and sometimes didn't want to return to school at the end of her weekends at the Round House. She ended up with a strange situation of part boarding, part day girl, and as Jo would have put it, she 'swithered' between the two states, not quite happy in either. 

Madge knew that she needed more attention and supervision, for Daisy was good hearted, but haram scarum and heedless. Her most recent exploit had been to nearly knock a kettle of boiling water over Sybil when playing an overenthusiastic game of chase. Daisy had been thoroughly penitent, and Sybil scared into being far more careful in the kitchen, which was no bad thing. Sybil was also beginning her own growing pains and resented all these cousins taking up her parent's attention, not to mention baby Josette, who was getting old enough to be an annoying little sister. Madge felt at times that she was more referee than parent or aunt. 

So it was some time after Jack and Rosalie arrived before Madge was able to visit unannounced. What she saw made her take notice immediately. Rosalie was persuaded to let the mother's help do more, while Madge was there, but her whole attitude gave the older woman a shrewd idea that as soon as she was gone, Rosalie would be taking the babies back again. 

She pondered the problem as she made her way home. Coming to no conclusion, she tackled Jem on the subject that evening. He had a soft spot for Rosalie, she had always worked efficiently and hard as his secretary, and had lived with them on the Sonnalpe for so long that he had to remind himself that she wasn't family. 

They talked through the possibilities, and the next day Jack was surprised to have a visit at work from the pair of them. He was initially irritated at the interference, seeing an implicit criticism of his ability to deal with his own young family. However, he knew that Rosalie wasn't happy, and once he had had time to think about it, he was grateful for the support from the older couple. 

"It sounds as though Rosalie isn't in the right state of mind to accept outright help" Jem had said, and Jack nodded agreement. "But we want to offer a solution, if you think it would work"

Madge joined in here, wanting to get the idea across "We wondered whether you would be willing to have Anna, to be with you as a full time live in helper. We would continue to pay her. She's an excellent cook, and used to children . More importantly, she is honest, and she has plenty of common sense..."

Jack bristled slightly, for he was proud, and didn't want charity. Nor did he like the suggestion that Rosalie and he might need someone else with common sense. Jem saw this and, more aware of the young man's conflicts with his pride and wish to stand alone, he explained. 

"We don't mean you or Rosalie, Maynard, surely you know how much we respect you both by now? No - I mean this girl you have helping. She seems to have sat back and let Rosalie do everything, without the sense or honesty to let you know that she isn't doing the job she is paid for."

Jack understood, and nodded to Jem to continue, all the while determined that if Anna were to come to help, he would pay for her, not the Russells. 

However, as Jem told him the idea that he and Madge had worked out, Jack relaxed a little. He could see what they were trying to do, and it could well suit the needs of both families. It made sense of Anna still being employed by the Russells, but also meant that his own family would have more help in return for houseroom. 

That talk with Jem and Madge was a very good one for their friendship. For the first time Jack realised that even though he hadn't ended up married to Jo, it didn't mean that he'd disappointed them; They finally managed to get across to him how grateful they were for Jack and Rosalie's part in bringing Robin and the others safely out of Austria. There might not be blood connection, but there was a family bond there, and even Jem had come to terms eventually with why Jack had taken Rosalie from Guernsey. Jack properly understood that afternoon that he wasn't back at the San purely because Jem was short on staff, but also because he was liked and respected. 

The plan was both beautifully simple and full of potential problems. Daisy, Primula Mary and Robin were to come and live with them, traveling daily to school. Anna's presence would be explained as being because of the extra work the girls would bring. Daisy and Robin loved the little triplets, and would naturally want to help where they could. Rosalie would be asked to accept them into the house as a favour to Madge, and also to try a change of scene for Daisy. 

The more they worked the plan out, the more Jack hoped that it would work. He hadn't wanted to bring it up with Rosalie, but he knew he needed to leave, even if not drafted yet. He had avoided enlisting while Rosalie had been pregnant, and could have avoided it further using his reserved occupation status. However, as more and more reports got back to him, and more friends were wounded or worse, he also felt he couldn't just stand by. If it wasn't for his young family, he would have enlisted already. 

Daisy, Robin and Anna being around would mean he wasn't leaving his wife completely alone when the time came. Rosalie had always got on well with the balanced Robin and been very fond of Daisy. It would do Daisy a lot of good to have the distraction of the babies. Madge was to approach Daisy as if she were helping Aunt Rosalie, by keeping her company, which they knew would appeal to the girl's kind nature. 

They couldn't guarantee the plan would work. Rosalie could well still refuse the help, and Daisy might take the situation the wrong way, and think she was being rejected, hence the plan for Robin and Primula going too. 

The plotters made a start, the mother's help was let go, and the household make up changed. Gradually Rosalie found that she could accept more help with the children, and the household. It didn't happen overnight, and she still had moments of refusing to let others near the babies. But at those times, strong solid Anna and gentle Robin smoothed the way, and the desire in Rosalie to help motherless Daisy distracted her a little. The triplets thrived on the attention, and Rosalie's smile and dry observational wit became more evident once more. 

\---

Phil stirred, half woke, then drifted back off to sleep again. The noise all around him in his dreams was terrible, never ending. He had a vague idea that when he woke properly, the 'real' world was dark, cool, quiet. It seemed so unlikely, however, the power of his mind playing tricks on him was too strong. 

The world that he was in at the moment, the chaos on every side, this was reality. His whole body felt the booming and shaking of the earth, the world falling to pieces all around him. He was helping a wounded man along, then another, then another. 

He had to get the patients to safety, the enemy was advancing so quickly. He needed to hurry, they needed to get moving, get away. He wanted to run, felt ashamed of the panic making him want to drop the bodies, leave these people holding him back behind. The wounded were so slow, he needed to save himself. But he couldn't leave them. He couldn't. 

More and more wounded men were grabbing onto him as he went, holding onto his ankles, making him trip. He had to kick them away, had to leave them. He wanted to apologise, hated that he couldn't take them all. Yet another latched on to his arm, and he had to hit out, had to push them away. 

There was pain suddenly in one hand, and he nearly surfaced out of sleep, before spiralling back down again. He dimly sensed that this must be the dream again; He seemed to be carrying 20 men in his arms, and his rational self knew that wasn't possible. He fought to escape the nightmare, still unable to cope with the idea of leaving even one of the men he carried behind, while his conscious mind told him they weren't real, that none of them would really die if he dropped them. 

More men were suddenly appearing on the top of those in his arms, Phil fell under the weight, they were too many, too heavy. This wasn't a dream, this was real. Was happening, he was sure of it. He had to get out from under the bodies, had to run, the enemy was coming.

His arms were pinned down in the mass of limbs, and a voice was coming from inside the pile of bodies. 

"GRAVES! GRAVES! PHIL! Wake up, man, wake up!"

He followed the voice, the vision of the people, mud and carnage began to fade. His arms were still unable to move however, he panicked as he struggled awake. Was he paralysed now? Was it still another dream, or was this real life? He couldn't tell. 

\---

Miss M Graves,   
Greentrees Cottage  
Bosherton  
Wales

Dear Miss Graves, 

I am pleased to be able to write to you with possible news of your brother, Dr Phillip Graves. It appears that the official notification may not have reached you, due to an incorrect address on file for you as his next of kin.

The records show that he possibly did survive the attack described in our previous correspondence, despite witness reports to the contrary. There is a man listed under his name and ID number on a group surrender to the enemy. 

Unfortunately it is not all good news. If this is your brother, he has been listed as a prisoner of war, and we cannot therefore get any confirmation at present that this is the correct man. It is possible for another man's name and number to be applied in error in official surrender of large groups like this. Fear of repercussions for having incorrect identification can mean that errors left uncorrected, without the soldiers involved admitting their true identity until after the conflict is over. 

I know that this must be confusing and frustrating, but I would recommend waiting to celebrate too much, and not to inform too many people until there is some official confirmation, or you receive a letter clearly from your brother. 

Please accept my apologies for the guarded nature of my message. As we discussed on your visit to our offices, these situations can be difficult to monitor exactly while conflict is ongoing. 

Yours Faithfully, 

Captain P Anglebody

Missing In Action   
Family Liason Office.   
*address blanked out*

-


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning for PTSD and rape in next few chapters, haven’t put it on whole story as it’s not descriptive or graphic, is a tiny part, and mainly background for the fact that the is going through a very difficult time.

The barracks swam into view. One of the wounded formed into the shape of his exhausted bunk mate, the voice became familiar to him. He realised that he was still struggling as if in the dream, and stopped trying to resist the pressure of his friend's arms holding him down. 

Seeing that Phil had returned, for now, his friend released his grip.

"Finally!" came from the other side of the barracks. 

"Noisy sod never seems to want to let us sleep" came a growl from another side 

"Should be in the loony bin, shouldn't be with us. Every night, every bloody night!"

"Shut up!" came cries from all sides. "You make more noise than he does, griping. Least he can't help it, poor bastard" 

The replies were expletive laden, but exhaustion made them all quiet down soon after. Phil lay back on the bunk, staring at his friend, still trying to focus his thoughts.

"You alright now?" John Marjorybanks said, even as his own tiredness sent him on his way back down to the lower bunk. "Gave Captain Stone a great shiner this time. Wouldn't like to be you in the morning."

Phil turned his head to see the empty bunk next to his. It wasn't the first time he'd hit his nearest neighbour in one of these dreams. The Captain was generally understanding, but he had clearly had enough this time, gone to sleep elsewhere. Phil closed his eyes and tried to force that memory, that fact, to stay, so that he could apologise in the morning. He was fairly sure that it wouldn't though so spoke to the man below him. 

"John, will you..."  
"Remind you? Yes."  
"Thanks John"  
"Forget it."  
"I'm sorry, I don't ..."  
"Phil?"  
"Yes?"  
"Shut up"

Phil lay back and tried to show his thanks by just being as quiet as possible, trying not to move the bunk too much. The snores from below and all around showed that it was worth it, and he had succeeded in not disturbing them any further.

He was himself far from sleep. He lay fully awake, trying just to rest, his thoughts still racing after the dream. He felt hugely disconnected, exhausted, but fired up with the effort of fighting his imagination. He felt that panic still driving him, as if the bombs and bodies were not really that far away. His system was telling him to leap from the bunk, keep running, and it took all his willpower to stay still, work out where he was, take stock. 

He didn't think he was dead, which was a start; But the smells around, and the feel of his dirty sheets under him were not reassuring either. He wasn't totally sure whether the nightmare was over, or just beginning. 

\---

Joey leant back against the backrest, feeling the regular jolt of the train, trying to focus on that to keep awake. It had been a long tour, and she was struggling to keep up. Her health, never reliable, was getting fragile again, after being caught in various downpours and subject to the poor conditions in some of the army bases. Being Joey she hid her symptoms as long as she could. She didn't want to be taken off the team, she felt driven to distract and cheer the soldiers they were entertaining. 

She had developed a cough, as had many of the troupe, however none of them realised quite how poor her childhood health had been, and how seriously ill she was beginning to get. 

Jo closed her eyes for a moment. Her friend was chattering on about their next destination, and Joey was struggling to follow what was being said. Her head was aching and she felt as though the carriage was getting further and further away.

She wasn't aware of slipping off the seat, nor of the exclamations and fuss as troupe gathered around her on the floor. It was a long journey to their next destination, and there was nothing they could do but make her comfortable.

\---

Madge Russell laughed as her small daughter did a clumsy forward roll and then grinned up at her. Josette was a happy child, rarely needing much attention, and openly pleased with any that she did get. Sybil laughed too, and encouraged her little sister to go again, starting her off straight, and chortling as Josette always managed to end up sideways. 

It had worked well, Robin and Daisy moving to live with Jack and Rosalie. Sybil was clearly responding to a little extra fuss and reassurance. Madge was able to cope again without having to worry about Daisy so much, and Rosalie was responding well with the extra help from the girls and Anna.

The administration problem at the school had been resolved quite suddenly and well, for the sister of one of the doctors had taken on the job, and Hilda and Nell were no longer trying to run the school and do all of the paperwork at the same time. They were able to take occasional days off now, and were sitting beside her, also chuckling at Josette's antics.

Hilda had just finished telling her story about Daisy, Gwensi and Beth discovering poachers, and the resultant official red tape and excitement among the girls. Madge was still alternately chuckling to herself and rolling her eyes at the girls for taking their outer garments off. How innocent they were at that age!

Jem stood in the doorway, struggling with what to do. His wife had had a lot of stress over the past year, and he didn't want to add to it. Especially since the message that he had just received didn't tell them much at all. He hadn't seen Madge in enough happy family scenes like this recently, and couldn't bring himself to break it up. After all there was nothing any of them could do, he needed to find out the truth of the situation, perhaps the message was wrong. He backed slowly out again and left a message simply saying that he had been called away, and may be gone overnight, knowing that Madge would assume it to be San business.

\---

Hilary Burn was back at the Chalet School, thinking of Nancy and wondering where she was stationed at the moment. She'd taken the post of games mistress with a sense of excitement, but it was hard being in the middle of nowhere when travelling was so restricted. When Nancy had leave it was almost impossible to manage to meet up, and they had to be so careful in their letters to each other, it almost felt as though they actually WERE just good friends, as though that magical year or so in London had been a dream.

Hilary was still too near to her own schooldays to feel like she was among friends in the staff room. She was uncharacteristically shy, and didn't talk to the other mistresses that much. No one knew that she was missing Nancy, even as a friend, and she certainly couldn't tell anyone of their true relationship. The staff who were near her own age were distracted. Simone was worrying about her fiancé, and the others were in a similar state to her, or overwhelmed by the demands of their work. Hilary worked hard, but rarely had evening tasks, since she didn't have that many girls for remedial exercises this term. She wished that Joey had been nearby, or Frieda or one of the others she knew better. Rosalie was very distracted with the babies, and had never been that close to Hilary anyway, even after their shared journey out of Austria.

For both of them, seeing each other reminded them of that terrible trek, and without a solid base of friendship before, they hadn't tended to keep up much contact after the escape. Rosalie had always seemed so much older than Joey somehow, even though there weren't many years between them, and Hilary didn't feel that she could confide in her in the way she might have with Joey.

Hilary stared out into the garden, wondering whether her decision to come back to the Chalet School had been a good one. She had been remembering a different place, with Old girls popping in at all hours, Frieda and Joey and others nearby, and her own friends in the Sixth form with her. She had been thinking that there would be many people she knew around. But it was different, somehow, now that she was here. She felt a child next to some of these mistresses, and didn't quite know how to interact with them.

She read and re-read Nancy's letters, unable to get much from them. Nancy wasn't much of a letter writer at the best of times, and the knowledge that the censor would read them made her even worse. Hilary kept having to remind herself how pleased Nancy had been to see her on their brief reunions before she had left London for this job.

Hilary wondered whether to stay here and hope things got better, or try to find a job in London. Nancy was determined that she should stay there, wanted her safely away if there were attacks on London. Hilary wasn't sure, after all she was so far from Nancy, she almost preferred to take the risk. But Nancy was so busy with her duties anyway, would they get much more time together even in London? Also was Nancy wanting her away from London for her own safety, or was she enjoying being semi single again? Hilary wasn't sure. She wasn't at all sure about all sorts of things

\---

Jem sat by the bedside, taken back to Joey's childhood, her familiar face drawn and pale, her voice strained, muttering through the fever. He'd really hoped she was past getting so badly ill, but from the reports he had read, she had been obsessively driven, hidden her symptoms, determined to push on through whatever conditions. He could well believe it; Joey never 'did anything by halves', and she had clearly given her all to the war effort.

He watched her eyes flicking beneath the closed lids and frowned. She'd turned a corner only a few hours before, and he could tell that her sleep was still disturbed, unnatural. He knew her well, however, and now that the worst of the fever was past, she would probably recover in leaps and bounds.

He stretched and got up from the stool, knowing that she would be unconscious for a while yet. He went outside for a bit of fresh air, then returned to talk to the young medical officer.

"She'll pull through now" he said, pointing to Joey when the medical officer looked confused, his mind clearly still on other patients. "She'll need watching, over the next few weeks, though. She tries to get up too soon, doesn't like bed any longer than she absolutely has to be there."

The medical officer listened politely, but didn't comment. Jem wondered if the man was taking any notice, or just humouring him, but decided that it wouldn't help Jo if he made a fuss, or forced the man to pay attention. After all, there were many more serious cases for the overworked medical officer to look after. To Jem, knowing her history, his young sister in law was all important, but compared to soldiers returning from battle, she was more routine, could hardly rank highly in the young doctor's priorities. Jem was determined to get her discharged to his care as soon as possible anyway, so didn't push the man into responding. Joey hopefully wouldn't be there long, and the young man wasn't senior enough to be an obstacle.

He said goodbye to the doctor, and went to see Joey's commanding officer. Here Jem was frustrated, for the tour had been so successful that they were not keen to agree to discharge Jo yet, for fear that their star turn would not return. Jem was getting really angry at the man's behaviour, after all she was in theory a volunteer.

The commanding officer tried to insist on her staying there, and getting back to the troupe as soon as possible, but Jem stood firm, using his own rank as protection from being asked to leave. Ultimately the commander sent for the Senior medical officer for their opinion, dropping heavy hints to the doctor that Jo would be sorely missed. The Senior medical officer was clearly torn between the commander's wishes and respecting Jem's medical status. James Russell was not someone to ignore in peacetime, but the commanding officer was important right now. The medical officer decided that he couldn't really comment without having treated Joey, so after more arguing, the young doctor treating Joey was called in

Jem inwardly groaned, sure that the distracted doctor would barely know who Joey was, and surely just agree with his superior officers. However he was pleasantly surprised to find that the younger doctor went against the less than subtle hints. He was polite but firm in agreeing that Joey ought to go 'home' for a break. He finally clinched the argument by suggesting that if she didn't rest now she might not be able to perform in future.

As they left the commander's office, Jem thanked the young man, and laughed at the response that slipped out from the tired man's lips.

"You would've probably camped out in the infirmary otherwise!"

He liked the honesty, but also it told him that the young man was paying more attention to the ward than it had appeared. The young doctor grinned at Jem, surprised and relieved that he was taking the unintentionally frank comment so well. He unbent a little, and agreed that he could see Jo was run down, home was the best place for her. He admitted that it wasn't just for her benefit; He had too many serious ill patients to try to keep one extra when she had support elsewhere.

Jem appreciated his candour, and said as much. He then asked the man's name, then told him that if he ever wanted a post, to contact him. The young man frowned, and stopped short in their walk across to the infirmary.

"I'm sorry sir, but that isn't why I helped. I honestly thought it best for the girl, although I do appreciate the offer. From the way my C.O was treating you, I'm guessing that you're someone important, but I'm sorry, I don't know who you are, and I don't want a job for simply stating a view I already held."

Jem was impressed all the more by this, and explained as much to the young doctor. "That's just why I'd be glad to have you on my team after the war, Peters. The patients come first with you, even if there's conflict. That's a good quality, try to keep hold of it."

Dr Peters thanked him, but still said he planned on returning to general practice after the war, while repeating that he appreciated the offer. They reached the infirmary and went in, Dr Peters to see to other patients, Jem to return to Joey's bedside.

She was just about waking, and gave him a weak smile. 

"Hullo there, must be bad if they've got you in. I quite went back to being 13 again, waking up to you watching over me."

He smiled and offered to get her a drink. She nodded, and accepted it gratefully. Her chest still felt tight, and her throat was raw. Jem told her to rest, and she slipped back to sleep quite soon after. He settled down on the chair beside her to snatch a quick doze himself. He wasn't going to risk the commanding officer coming and appealing to Jo to stay, for he knew the warm hearted girl would want to do her best, even if it risked her long term health. Joey was as dear to him one of his own children, and he wasn't going to let her run herself ragged and make the situation worse.

He still hadn't told his wife, so Madge couldn't believe her eyes, when he returned from a 'trip to see a friend' with Joey in tow. Her sister was just too tired to talk, but once she had been settled in a spare room, Jem explained a little and apologised for the secrecy.

"Thankfully she seems to be over the worst, although it's hard to tell how ill she managed to get before it was picked up."

Madge looked at him, her distress obvious on her face. She'd spent so many years with Jo being fragile, she couldn't help but be concerned, even if she was in recovery now.

"Jo's been so much stronger the past few years, then she gets run down enough for Jack to intervene last year, and badly ill now. I thought all worry was at an end for her?" she said.

Jem heard the catch in her voice, and pulled her into his arms, before answering.

"I think she'll be fine" he said, and hoped he was right. "She's far stronger now than she ever used to be, and this could well just be bad luck and Jo not paying proper attention to her health."

With that Madge had to be content. Thankfully Jo herself seemed determined not to be in bed any longer than necessary, so made her usual speedy recovery. She was sure herself that she had just gone on the tour too soon after her earlier situation, then ignored her body's warning signs when this cold and chest infection set in. 

As soon as she was well enough to make her own decisions, Joey was determined to go back to supporting the war effort in any way she could. Jem was in part frustrated, but also slightly proud of her, for she just didn't see any risk to her own health or safety once anyone else's needs involved.

The troupe had already moved on, and replaced her, but when she returned for duty a surprising suggestion was made, namely that she return to America, to raise awareness and support for the US joining the war. Other British stars were doing tours already, and the suggestion was that Joey would be ideal. She took some convincing, but finally understood that she could use her talents to help far more people this way, by raising funds and support.

Jem wasn't sure whether this was better than the previous situation or not. He worried that she would let herself get run down again, and found it hard to take Madge's advice not to interfere.

"After all, much as she might feel like our child, she's an adult now, and an adult who knows her own mind" Madge said, when he wanted to encourage Jo to stay, to protect her from her tendancy to overdo things. "She's desperate to help, be useful, and she needs her own life. We can only offer support and be here if she needs us"

If she was honest, Madge wasn't really at all keen on Joey travelling back to the States, boats were under attack all around the UK. But she knew Joey, knew she always had to be on the go, doing something. If it wasn't this she would be back out there with another set of performers. At least once she was over in America the risk from the war itself was relatively low. There were now air raids even in Armishire, she would probably be a lot safer in America.

Madge had seen how stifled Jo felt, even while she enthusiastically helped with the children, she was clearly bored already with visiting the school and resting. She had been glad to see everyone, especially the Robin, and she had managed to cheer Hilary up, simply by being around to talk to about Nancy. She had refused to visit Jack and Rosalie and the triplets, saying she didn't want to risk the babies catching anything from her; but once she was fully well Jack and Rosalie had each come to see her in turn, so she had known she was welcomed. For a while, she had enjoyed being back amongst friends and family.

There had been a flurry of excitement when Simone had a last minute wedding, and Frieda had visited before leaving to be near Bruno and others of her family. There had been a lot of fun being together again, once Jo was well enough to join in and visit friends.

But now Madge could see that her young sister was ready to move on, was getting distracted more and more by daydreams. She had a far away look in her eyes, and Madge could tell that she was missing performing.

Jem couldn't help wanting to keep her there, keep her safe, but he listened to his wife, and merely warned Jo not to ignore her health so much.

Jo waved goodbye from the train window, then settled down for her journey back to America. She couldn't help but think of that first boat trip, only a few short years ago. She had been so innocent then, so vague in her dreams to explore the world. Now she was finally going to do some of that exploring, see more than just New York. She would be among some of her heroes as well, supporting their acts and hopefully able to learn from them.

It was again a new adventure, and Joey was ready to face it head on, take all that she could from the experience. She settled back in the carriage, and let her mind wander, dreaming of all the new things to come.

Back in Armishire it felt strangely as if a light had gone out. Joey had gone. It was supposedly only a short tour, but Jem and Madge both suspected it would be extended. Although neither expressed it out loud, they knew a part of Joey regretted leaving New York so early in her career, however much she had restarted her career eventually. Everyone around her could tell she wouldn't be a supporting act for long. Joey just had an indefinable quality that drew people to her, and even with her short career, she was fast becoming one of the nation's sweethearts. All that Jem and Madge could do was watch from afar and be ready to catch her if she should fall.

\---


	12. Chapter 12

Nancy sat on her bunk, feet drawn up beneath her, frowning over her letter. Every time she started to think of things to share with Hilary, of ways to pass on how much she missed her, she would be brought back to the fact that she had to hide where she was, what she was doing, and she would sigh, screw up the piece of paper and start again.

Nancy was a terrible correspondent, it was true. But on this occasion she had no choice, and it hurt her to give so few details, to have to put Hilary off trying to meet her when on leave. If Hilary had only known, moving to London would have made no difference, since Nancy was no longer serving there, despite having told no one of her move.

She'd joined the WRENS, wanting to do all that she could, that much was true. But shortly after the outbreak of war, she had been approached, and recruited to an operation so secret that decades later many of the participants considered themselves still bound to secrecy.

"We need trustworthy, intelligent people... You were recommended personally... The breaking of these codes could make the difference between the war being won or lost."

It was not a request that she wanted or was able to refuse. Along with thousands of other staff who had to hide their true work, she joined the teams intercepting, documenting and breaking codes. The work was done in the end at various locations around the country, and she would move around and do many different tasks by the end of the war, but at the moment Nancy was based at the hub, Bletchley Park.

She couldn't think who, had recommended her, but after all, it did make sense. She was a graduate mathematician, with sound grounding in at least three languages. She was unmarried, could go wherever needed, was reliable and able to keep a secret.

Many codebreakers were men, genius level intellects, including those creating very early versions of computers, but they were supported by thousands of women. Nancy initially was frustrated to be doing what she saw as more basic work than her abilities, assumed it to be because she was female. But once she realised quite how bright and intensely focused some of the main code breakers were, she felt happier having a smaller role. Nancy was dedicated, but she saw more to life than maths and maths alone, and the intensity of some of these geniuses was too much for her to envy their more senior roles for long. She happily worked alongside others in supporting the effort to break the codes and decipher the messages. Every small cog played a part in the thousands of people gradually wearing away at the task.

Nancy was proud of what she was doing, and wished she could explain to Hilary, let her know that the lack of contact was not through lack of caring. But she was also aware that the secrecy surrounding Bletchley Park meant even stricter censors than most. If the enemy knew how many of their codes were being broken, they would change their systems, and it might not be possible to break them again.

So Nancy knew keeping Bletchley's secrets was important. She didn't want to risk that in the slightest way, or be asked to leave. The fact of her relationship with Hilary might cause her all sorts of problems as well, so she had to protect them both by just apparently writing to a school friend, however much she missed her and wanted to tell her so.

Nancy gave up for now, and lay down to rest. She had a lot to think about, and a small nugget of information that perhaps explained who had recommended her. She had seen some visiting VIPs from a distance, and she could have sworn that one of them was a familiar figure with the slightest of favouring of one leg, and a shock of white hair over a young face. Nancy wondered if she would ever know if her suspicions were correct, but suspected she wouldn't. 

Secrecy was so strongly impressed upon them all that they didn't talk about their work outside their small workgroups, even with other members of the whole team.  
She felt as though some of the security warnings were etched in her brain.

Do not talk at meals ...  
Do not talk in the transport ...  
Do not talk travelling ...  
Do not talk in the billet ...  
Do not talk by your own fireside ...  
Be careful even in your Hut ...

If 'Bill' had been there, she would have signed the Official Secrets Act, be under the same restrictions, so unless they met on base or in a team, they couldn't discuss it. Nancy couldn't be sure, the woman had been a little way away, but a little part of her liked the idea of Bill being involved too, even if she couldn't talk to her about it.

She wondered several times whether Miss Wilson had been the source of her recommendation, and was determined to make Bill and the Chalet School proud. That included not telling even her precious Hilary, having to risk seeming distant, even evasive. It was too important that people didn't know how far ahead the code breakers were. Gossip spread so easily, even when you trusted someone, it only took one person to overhear. 

Nancy took her oath of secrecy very very seriously, people's lives depended on it, after all. At various points of the war troop movements were known by the Allies in such detail that it was possible to turn the tide of the war, to finish it years earlier than might otherwise have been possible. Equally some hard decisions had to be made, not to save some lives that would have alerted the enemy to the breach in security. There would have been an outcry if this had been known, so secrecy was important, vitally so.

So Nancy kept her secret, along with so many of the Bletchley Park teams. Some people admitted their involvement in the 1970s, when more was made public, but many, like Nancy, simply got on with their lives after the war, and didn't boast; didn't show how proud they were to have helped.

In the next millenium some finally admitted their involvement, but even then it was rare for them to say much, except perhaps to each other, at reunions where fewer and fewer people were around to attend as the years went on.

One ATS girl, a radio interceptor, reached the age of 89 before saying one day quite suddenly. "I wonder whether we should have told people more... There's so few of us left now, and these things are dying away with us... " she mused to her granddaughter. "But we all just considered ourselves bound. We weren't to say anything, even after the war was over. So we didn't"

Even then she died without telling much, other than the open fact that she had been part of it all, still wanting to keep her promise. It was the internet that told her grandaughter more, quite strange looking at that familiar name on an online Roll of Honour; Finding out from a web database that she was an Interceptor, where she had been based, how many years she was there, then reading the fact that these "trustworthy women were recruited directly through personal contacts" and feeling even prouder than she already was of her 'Housewife and Mother' grandmother; Wishing she'd listened harder as a child being taught morse by her, and assuming her detailed knowledge was because she "had been a Brown Owl" for Brownies.

It must have been strange for some of these women listening to their husbands able to describe their war work openly, see grandchildren proud of "Grandpa in the RAF" or being told by them "Mrs So and So was a Land Girl/ helped on the buses / worked as a nurse" and not telling, not saying 

"I was part of the war too, I helped, in an important way. I was there."

\---

Joey was tired, deeply tired. However it was a healthy exhaustion, well deserved and from effort happily given. She had been touring for months now, first as a support act, then soon enough as a lead act in her own right. 

She had been amazed to find that she was so well received, and was pleased that she was able to entertain so many people night after night, without losing interest in what she was doing. She knew that political opinion was moving towards the US entering the war, and there were hopes that if they did it would turn the tide, that the war might well be over soon.

She understood more and more why this tour was necessary, why ordinary Americans didn't automatically understand the issues. The war was so far away that she herself found it almost seeming unreal, like a story. Getting American people behind the war effort was not easy, when they saw it as no great threat to themselves.

She had made many contacts, understanding now just how important they were. Initially it was purely to get the politicians behind her cause, but along with that she began to understand how she had been very naive in her own self promotion before. Talent wasn't the only thing that determined a career; Knowing people who could help you move forward was half the battle. In order to build a career in the competitive world of musical theatre, you had to be able to act and play a part off stage as well as on.

Joey the forthright had to bend her small talk in order not to alienate the important people who visited backstage after a show. These people had the power to mobilise millions of dollars, and influence to help her countrymen win the war. She couldn't upset them without due thought, for that could hurt others, put these people off her cause.

In having to reduce her outspokenness, Joey benefitted from actually having to listen to other people's points of view. She began to understand the need to work with these promotors, and to be willing to be photographed, to make her life more open, to raise her own profile, as it all gave more strength to her cause.

She'd always been interested in history, and now she began to remember her interest as she travelled around the States, learning about each of the places that she was visiting. Her previous view had been very European in outlook, and she began to understand how different this place was, despite the similarity of language and sometimes of appearance. 

She hadn't planned it, but her knowledge often showed in her act, or in her after show conversations, and marked her out as having made an effort, made her memorable and more attractive to the promoters in each city.

Typically of Joey, she hadn't particularly intended for this tour to help kickstart her career in the US, but her talent and natural charisma came through. She began to be well known on both sides of the Atlantic, and to attract attention to herself, to her every action. She couldn't help it, it was just part of being Joey. Her natural charisma and enthusiasm shone through, making her friends for the most part, but envy or fear from some by her continued rise to fame.

\---

Back in Armishire, Madge was sitting reading the paper with a troubled look on her face. The British newspapers seemed to be suddenly leading public opinion against the entertainers who had gone to America, which was upsetting in itself. There were suggestions that they were deserting their country, were choosing personal safety over patriotism. 

Joey hadn't been mentioned initially by name, after all she was one of the forces sweethearts, had shown her support already by touring and helping morale, had even become ill doing so. But as the tours went on, as she became more famous and headlined more concerts, the public feeling seemed to turn, and it was poisonous reading that Madge held in her hands that morning.

JOSEPHINE WILSON TOO? was the headline, followed by oblique comments about her leaving the country, skewed references to her having lived in Austria, and having German and Italian friends. There was also a comment that she had previously left New York under a cloud, and then insinuations that she was using the tour for her own advantage.

Many of Joey's school friends had made new lives in America due to the situation in Europe. She was often visited after concerts by them, and she was glad to welcome them, be photographed talking and laughing with them. Now those pictures were being used in an accusatory way, implying her German, Austrian and Italian friends were an indication of her lack of patriotism.

Madge felt like screwing the paper up and throwing it across the room. It was all so absurd. Joey gave everything in her to help anyone, and she always had done. The people that were being listed in the UK papers as suspicious were also all known to Madge, former pupils and their families. It made her all the more angry that she knew that they were set well against the current far right politics of their homelands. Many were there to escape persecution for resisting the regimes, for goodness sakes.

She knew that Joey would have a few days before this paper reached her, and she was torn between warning her little sister and wanting Joey to have a little longer before finding out how she was being portrayed in the UK. She wasn't sure what to do for the best, but in the meantime she was just boiling in righteous anger at the words that she had read


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PTSD and rape triggers possible somewhere around here as mentioned before.

Phil Graves stood at the side of the compound, mentally drifting in the clouds above, savouring the quietness that rarely came in his mind lately. He followed strands of white as they moved across the sky. He'd never noticed how peaceful and soothing clouds were until recently. They moved at their own pace, broke up, reformed, build patterns in the sky that even the greyness of the POW camp couldn't wipe away.

His bunkmate John arrived beside him with food for them both. Phil flashed a grateful smile, and thanked him before starting on the meagre portions. Many of the POWs believed the rations to be deliberate, but in fact there were shortages of food throughout Europe, and by the end of the war some Allied POWs would be being fed better than German citizens.

Phil was unaware of the grumbles around him. He was making the most of the respite from his chaotic thoughts. He often felt as though his worries and memories had long tails, and as the nightmares churned him up, those tails knotted and tangled. It took much of the morning each day to undo those tangles, work out where he was, try to get some sort of hold upon WHO he was. Even then, his short term memory was very erratic, he wouldn't remember things one moment to the next. He spent months feeling frustrated by this, before accepting that he could do nothing about it, his recovery was just going to be a slow one. At least he was recovering, starting to be able to pay attention to the world around him better, and remember a few things from day to day. To begin with, he had been so tangled in his own mind that he had woken each day as if it was his first day there, and had felt unable to hold a thought for more than a few moments before it slipped away. He was having slightly fewer headaches now, helped no doubt by John making sure that he ate regularly, and had as balanced a diet as was possible in their situation.

Phil knew now he would never have survived the first few months without John Marjorybanks. He had been too scattered of thought to understand the routines, and there were always people around to take advantage, steal his rations, convince him he had already eaten. The shock of capture and the limitations of their imprisonment had made otherwise friendly men hardened and selfish. Their own hunger became more important than rules, or what was 'fair' and Phil was an easy target.

As their time in the camp had continued, other needs began to affect them all, especially those missing wives and girlfriends. Phil had taken to trying to avoid the nightmares by walking between the cabins until he absolutely had to go in at night, and so was an easy target. He had no strength to fight them off, and as the mess within his brain gave him so little memory, he had no way of avoiding the same thing happening night after night. His tormentors took his repeated arrival in the same place at the same time as acceptance, assumed he wanted their attentions, despite fighting them off every night, thought it was part of a game for him. He couldn't get the words to tell anyone, or the strength to stop them. It couldn't even be something he was resigned to, for each morning he placed the experience as being part of the nightmares, decided that it hadn't really happened. He was in a cycle that he couldn't escape, and couldn't tell anyone about, for as soon as the words formed in his mind, they scattered again.

It was John Marjorybanks who discovered what was happening, put together the bruises on Phil's body with the rumours he heard. He was the only one who realised just how short Phil's memory was, how poor his current comprehension of their surroundings. He wasn't strong enough to fight the men for Phil, so instead he fought Phil's memory loss, and distracted him from his repetitive wanderings, kept him within the bunkhouse once darkness fell. It didn't work every time, but as Phil also got his rations properly when he was with John, his system began it's own fight, and he was able to remember enough and understand enough to trust John, to remember not go for the night time walks, even though he feared the nightmares.

John nearly gave up many times. Phil seemed set on a path of self destruction, and John almost felt as though he ought to let the man go, in effect let him take his own life through neglect. He even doubted his friend on occasion, surely no one could forget things that quickly. Perhaps Phil did like the encounters with the men, they certainly claimed that he must do, to keep coming back. John often felt like giving up, leaving his bunkmate to his fate. But then he would see the state of Phil when he came in, or there would be the tiniest move forward, the tiniest sign of the man Phil must have been. John knew from that that he had to keep going. If Phil recovered his brain enough to make a proper choice, to want to go to the men, or to starve himself to death, then John wouldn't stand in his way. Until then he was in need of protection, and John was going to help him fight his mangled brain as much as he could.

Finally, slow, slow progress was made, and Phil managed to identify the nightmares from the reality, to understand what had been happening. John's greatest reward was when Phil managed to plan ahead, get to the mess hall before him, find rations, and take them to his friend as a surprise with a half smile and "Thank You". It was one of the first actions requiring more than a few moments of awareness that Phil had managed since his capture. From that point on their friendship was able to move towards being more equal, though Phil was still not able to easily remember much, or distinguish dreams from reality. However he was recovering himself, bit by bit. When John fell ill, Phil's longer term memory managed to click back to his training, and he tended to his friend with far more skill than the camp doctors, surprising everyone around them.

As the months passed, Phil gradually was able to remember his family, be a bit more sure of his name. Until then, whenever the Red Cross representative tried to question whether he really was Phil Graves, he just couldn't in all honesty say yes. His sisters had lived in a limbo, not sure whether to write much, whether he really was alive or not. They didn't want to get an imposter in serious trouble, didn't know if the man would be shot if found out. So despite the distress it caused them, they didn't push too hard for identification or letters from him. It wasn't until he began to remember and agree that he was Phil Graves that they dared to hope, and to write to him. He was almost scared, suddenly having letters to open, news from a home that he had only a fragmented sense about. He had been so afraid that his memories of home were dreams, almost couldn't cope with the suggestion that these people were real, that they loved and missed him. He didn't know how to reply, was still afraid that the Red Cross had got it wrong, that this Phil Graves wasn't really him. These people loved Phil Graves so much, what if it was a mistake? He couldn't really tell who he was, didn't know whether this life fitted him or not.

He confided in John, who reassured him, and finally agreed to write to Phil's sister for him, to gently explain the situation. The replies with photographs were enough to convince John that this was Phil's real identity, his real family. Phil gradually managed to write back to them, and John supplemented those bare bones with actual information about how Phil was improving, and about their daily life, as far as the censors would allow. Phil's sisters got used to keeping their own letters to him simple, not putting too many details in to risk confusing or scaring him. It was too hard for him to match their words to memories that were all muddled in with the nightmares. Gradually as time went on, Phil was able to separate his dreams from reality. John rarely had cause to worry about him, and the nightmares reduced a little bit at a time.

Once John found him staring for hours at a picture of a famous singer another soldier had pinned up. John sat down next to Phil and asked him what was wrong. His friend turned to him, despair in his eyes, and explained that the picture matched some of his dream memories, was one of the images that helped him escape from the clinging bodies.

"I didn't know who she was, but... I'd hoped... Maybe she was someone who... Who I'd known. I hoped that one day, I'd remember, maybe could look forward to seeing her again." Phil said, and to John's surprise he began to cry. "But... That's the face. It's her... She's just a pinup girl, a singer. I must have seen her perform, I suppose, just been in the crowd. Or maybe I just had a picture like this, I don't know... I really thought that dream was a real memory John."

John understood, wished he could help. He knew that Phil would probably forget this fact, just like so many of the short term events in his day to day life, but that was no help, for as soon as he saw the picture again the next day the reality would hit again. John couldn't help the fact that the woman was a dream, a crush rather than a sweetheart, but he did the next best thing he could for his friend. He spoke to the soldier, asked him to keep the picture out of sight. Phil's natural good nature had started to endear him to others, especially now that he was disturbing their sleep less. The soldier agreed without a problem, and over time others with the photo went along with the plan too, it was the least they could do for the effort Phil gave in keeping them all healthy.

John never knew whether Phil remembered about the woman being a pin up, but the nightmares didn't seem to get any worse, so he hoped that that dream was still alive. There weren't many things to make life as a POW brighter, if Phil could dream that a celebrity was someone he knew and loved, good for him. John wasn't going to let life get in the way of that dream.

\---

Joey sat and looked at the newspapers. It was all so stupid, all twisted in such a nasty way. She felt angry for her friends even more than she did for her own reputation. 

How dare these journalists suggest them to be on the side of the Nazis, when they'd often lost so much to oppose and then escape the regime in their home countries? She felt irritated rather than angry about the slurs on her own character. Joey had begun to get the necessary thick skin where the press was concerned. They were allies up to a point, but if there were a chance of a story, they would grab it.

Brushing the papers to one side, she concentrated on her sister's letter, frowning slightly at the news of influenza in the school, but reassured that Robin and the children were safe from harm. Once the general news was imparted, Madge focused quite strongly on Robin in the letter, and Joey could tell she was worried. Apparently Robin had chosen not to either stay at home or continue to university, but had been talking very seriously about being called to a religious life. Madge respected this, but worried that it was too soon, that Robin was too young to be thinking so seriously. Joey however wasn't totally surprised. She just hoped that Robin would be strong enough to cope with the work, and that she would be happy. She could tell that that was Madge's worry too. Robin was so much stronger than she used to be, but she was still vulnerable to health issues, and communal living and social work of the kind Robin was suggesting would put her at risk. The girl was as precious to them all as if she had been born to the family, and while Madge and Jem knew they could never replace her lost parents, they took their role as guardians very seriously. Robin was just like a sister to Jo, and a daughter to Madge and Jem, no matter the lack of blood ties.

As Joey thought about it, she smiled at the make up of their family. She saw Madge more as mother than sister, although strangely Dick had never felt like a father figure, despite Joey having lost both parents so young as to barely remember them. Robin, feeling like a baby sister delivered to their care as a 6 year old, and living with them even once her father return to work as Jem's secretary. Then all of the children of the family, cousins mixed like siblings, from both sides, with poor Daisy a middle child, neither quite part of the babies, nor the older ones. On top of that mixture, the long serving staff of the school felt more like Aunts or cousins to Jo, despite no official family tie. Families seemed to make themselves, and how strange it would feel to her now to only consider those of your own blood as belonging.

As Joey moved on to a letter from the girl herself, she saw that Robin had guessed Madge's worries. The girl was in some ways much older than her years, and not one to make any decision lightly. She knew the risks, and was troubled more about Madge and Jem's reaction than her own health.

'I know they worry about me, Joey, and feel that perhaps I should wait, go to university first. I think that would be lovely in many ways, but ... I would just be putting off what I feel born to do. It isn't as though I'm needed here really. Rosalie is so determined to do as much as she can alone, even now, and the Triplets are good as gold. If she does accept help there's Anna, Madge or Daisy. Perhaps it is being closer in age to them, but Daisy seems to see them as her own little sisters, and it's been so good for her to have them as a focus.

Madge and Jem don't really need me either, and their nursery are a self sufficient little bunch. They'd miss me and I them, but they don't NEED me there. You aren't in a position where I could help you by my presence either, although if you did I would be there straight away of course! I do miss you Joey, but am so proud of you.

Aunty Hilda and Bill are supportive whichever way I chose, but I can tell that they feel I could do both, and they are naturally inclined to want me to go to University, as well as wanting me to be sure that the religious life id for me. I do love learning, and I am sure that I would enjoy Oxford. I'm not arrogant enough to assume that I would get in, but the staff seem to think it likely.

But Joey - I just feel I'd be marking time at university, waiting to follow my true path, begin the work I was born for, feel called to do. If I can make a difference in just one life by being trained and prepared earlier, it feels so much more important than waiting to "grow up" so that everyone worries about me less. Yet it seems so ungrateful after everything that everyone here has done for me, and my years of preparation, not to at least give them those few years of study. I know they feel that I might change my mind, but somehow I don't think I will. It truly is a calling for me Joey, I just feel that I want to answer as soon as I can. Do you have any advice? I don't quite like to talk to Rosalie about it, lovely though she is to me. It's something so personal, being called in this way...

Joey put the letter down and stared into space. Robin was still so young, she might well be confused. Yet somehow Jo didn't think she was, the idea of Robin dedicating her life to God and helping others seemed totally logical. The girl had been deeply spiritual even as a child, and Joey felt intuitively that if Robin was meant to do this, then she would end up doing so. Yet she knew that it would be like a child leaving the nest to Madge, and Joey shared the fear that the conditions or hardships Robin might face could well be too much for her physically, which seemed to be Jem's main concern. She wasn't sure how to advise Robin, for she had no good answer to give.

For the first time in a while, Joey began to feel a little homesick, and wish she were able to talk to Madge and Jem in person. The mentions in both letters of the Triplets also made her wistful, want to see them, along with Jack and Rosalie. She missed the little family she'd been part of for a while. Perhaps it was time to go home for a bit? However if she did, she would be unlikely to get back to America again, and then unlikely to have a career here once the war was over. Family or career? A difficult choice. 

She shelved the problem of Robin's future for now, and returned to her post, or mail as they called it here. A few letters from fans and promoters, and then one from Cornelia, who'd now left school and returned to stay with her Aunt in New York. Her father was still travelling in Europe a lot on business, but wanted her safe, or at least safer, back in America. Corney was clearly bored, and openly wondering whether Joey was likely to be nearby any time soon. She'd started to get interested in Jazz and Blues, which reminded Joey of her own trips to clubs and the excitement of the improvisation and collaboration going on there. Corney had finally put in the effort required for her saxophone, although she said that she wasn't brave enough to be playing in public.

Joey wondered whether this would be another option. The latest tour had ended, and as yet there were no plans for another. They'd achieved their objective, and raised awareness of the state of things in Europe. She was now torn between returning to Britain, maybe touring the troops again, and staying in America, building her career here. 

She wanted to do all that she could, but she also knew inside that she couldn't cope with the conditions of the war zone. Her imagination was too vivid, and her drive to help everyone meant she couldn't be measured in her time with the soldiers. So if she did go back, she would just be at home, perhaps entertaining recovering soldiers, or boosting civilian morale; But her real impact with that sort of life would, she felt, be minimal. She'd really just be another person there, eating and using supplies that were becoming precious, and marking time until the war was over. 

Her instinct was that she should stay there, could help better here, but was that just an excuse? Was she just wanting to pursue her own career rather than serve her country? As Joey realised she was slightly doubting her own motives, she ruefully decided that she ought not to judge the newspapers for being suspicious, as much as she knew her intentions so far had been true to the war effort. 

She also knew that if the army asked her to return she would - yet they were strangely silent about her going on any more European tours. She suspected the negative press in the UK was making them wary, and felt a stab of anger that they put her in the position to be accused, knew all the good she was doing, yet then seemed to back away when any bad press resulted.

A big part of her knew she could say "I've done my bit, I'm going to concentrate on me for a while". 

But she wasn't built or trained to think that way. Every time that temptation came, a picture of Phil Graves, or others came to mind. Jack Maynard had gone into the Navy shortly after Joey herself left; Simone's husband was in the army and many brothers of friends were fighting in this war. If the United States entered the war, then some of the new friends and acquaintances she'd made would be going too - encouraged by her showing them help was needed. So she was torn, couldn't quite work out what was best for her to do.

Visiting Corney and spending time in New York might be a good break for her, help her clear her mind a bit. Joey decided that she would have to make her decision a piece at a time. If she was in New York she was potentially half way home if she was needed. She could rest a bit, build up her stamina, and spend some time with Corney, who did sound a little lost and lonely at the moment. 

It wasn't that long ago that Mademoiselle had died, and Joey was one of the few who realised how much the ex headmistress had taken the place of Corney's lost mother. Corney was one whose exterior was bold and occasionally brash, but whose feelings ran deeper than they seemed. So Joey decided that was her best course of action. She would go to revist New York, see some of her old friends from before the war, and spend some time with Corney. It wasn't quite a full decision as to her future plans, but it would do for now.

In the end, the decision was taken out of Joey's hands, for the political situation and risks of crossing the Atlantic meant that as soon as she mentioned her return to both her family and her superiors, the message was the same. 'Stay where you are, both for your own safety and for the benefit to the war effort. Things are too volatile to risk a journey back.'

Joey felt a guilty sense of relief, and didn't argue with the advice. If she was honest, she wanted more than anything to just explore her old haunts, meet friends from her previous visit and spend time with Corney. As she'd suspected, Corney was not quite herself, was alarmingly subdued for her. She was badly missing the routine and purpose of being at school. Joey started by simply spending time with her, before gradually making her talk about Mademoiselle's death, and on from that to her own future. Corney had no need to work for money, and the expectation from her aunt at least was that she would become part of New York society and then probably marry. 

"I guess I didn't really think much further than getting through school, Joey." Corney explained one day as they walked along one of the wide streets of the city. 

"I assumed that I would leave school, see what Poppa wanted me do, probably do the social events my aunt wants me to attend, go to college maybe... I don't quite know when that changed. It wasn't just Mademoiselle..."

Joey listened, and waited, for she'd learnt with Corney that silence often made her open up more than questions. She herself knew just the stage Corney had reached. Her life was her own, confusingly free after the controlled environment of school, yet filled with other people's expectations. 

It had been just this stage and type of feeling that had led Joey to go to America, start her own adventure. She couldn't imagine how her life might have turned out if had stayed in the Tyrol, but it was a big decision, so she knew that Corney needed to make choices for herself. Joey was happy in her own direction, although she did miss her family and friends. If she had stayed in Austria, then maybe she'd have given in, married Jack perhaps. That would have been a real pity, on both sides, he deserved a lot more than she'd have been able to give. Joey couldn't imagine Jack with anyone but Rosalie now; they seemed so perfect for each other. 

She realised Corney had finally worked out what she wanted to say. 

"I often think about the plane crash, trying to save the pilot...That made me think about how precious life is... It also made me realise how isolated things are at school sometimes. You just have no idea how much is going on out there in the real world. I sorta feel that I have to make sure I do what feels right..."

Joey agreed. Her own experience of the war had brought home to her how things could be so calm in one place, then absolute chaos in another. She said as much, and the pair wandered off on threads of conversation, speculating about whether and when the US might enter the war. Corney was happy to follow the distraction; she didn't feel she could quite explain the other reason for her indecision as to her future. 

She knew Joey would dismiss the idea that she was a role model, a leader, yet she had inspired more than Corney by her actions in following her dream, in seeming to reject the "Wife, Mother, or failing that, Teacher" mind-set. Corney had decided to try, to see whether music would be her career, or at very least a full time hobby. 

She just worried that she herself wasn't like Joey, that she didn't have the staying power to go against the norm, try for her dream. There was no real demand for a young female saxophone player that she could see, no concrete future. Yet somehow Corney wanted to try with all her heart; Even if she couldn't expect Joey's success, she might at least have a good time trying.

The biggest worry was how. The relative anonymity of being in Austria and then Guernsey had allowed Cornelia to forget her millionaire status, and led to a far more normal life than she would have had in the States. Now that she was back, it seemed that every fortune hunter in town considered her fair game, and anything like this would be quickly in the news. 

Corney hated the social scene, but New Yorkers she knew took it very seriously. She'd become a recognisable face very quickly, so any action would be reported by gossip columnists; More importantly, she was a potential target for kidnappers. So she had to think very carefully now about every action, and the itinerant lifestyle of a musician was a risky one for her. 

Joey had an idea of Corney's dreams, though no clue about the fact that she herself had in part inspired them. She wanted to help her, but worried that she was trying to aim for something too male dominated, that she would never be taken seriously. There was an all-female Jazz band, led by Peggy Gilbert, but most serious roles were taken by men, and the touring circuit was another one where connections mattered, and many had started or still were mainly doing vaudeville as their parents had before them. 

Joey wanted to be sure how serious Corney was, as she would like to help if she could. She'd met Peggy Gilbert through the saxophonist's partner Kay Boley, who had been performing at the same venue as Joey on a recent tour. From conversation with Peggy and Kay, Joey knew more than most that Corney would have to be exceptional to succeed, much as Peggy was trying to change the treatment of female musicians. 

Joey hadn't told her young school friend of this possible contact yet, for she worried that this was just a fad, or a rebellion, and that Corney would not stick to the work required to get on in entertainment. Her father wanted her to attend college, at least while she was so undecided, and Joey didn't want to discourage Corney from that, for the girl seemed lost, unsure of what she wanted. If Corney showed real determination in this, then Joey would do her utmost to get her a start, but she knew that introducing an heiress with no performance experience would not get far with Peggy or Kay. 

Corney needed to get past the first part, and that Joey could help with. She was lucky enough to find some of the Jazz clubs were still a haunt for people she'd met last time. Corney was allowed a chance to play for them, see whether they would let her join in occasionally. That wouldn't interfere with college, and would let Corney see the life she was dreaming about as the hard work it truly was, which would be far more useful than Joey using contacts to let her jump a stage and audition for Peggy's band. 

Joey watched the club audition almost wanting to bite her nails. To her Corney sounded great, but she just didn't know enough about the instrument or the music to be sure whether she was good enough. The club owner seemed to think she passed muster, however, for she was allowed to join the resident band when cover was needed. Joey was pleased, happy that she could help her friend, and sure that this would help Corney decide. 

The club owner watched them go, and shook his head at their excitement. He hoped that he'd made the right decision; girls couldn't always be relied upon in his experience. Thankfully he didn't regret the risk, for apart from Corney's own talent and determination, the gossip columns quickly picked up on her new activity, and the club became a hot place to be for a time, with socialites coming to be nosy about one of their own, and staying for the music. Corney hated the exposure to begin with, but pushed through and kept to her dream. 

Later, Joey introduced her to Peggy and Kay, and they advised and mentored her as far as they were able, giving her a chance to join Peggy's band on a USO tour. Corney's father was worried, and insisted upon her travelling with bodyguards where possible, but was also proud of his determined daughter. 

Joey wondered touring again herself, but she just couldn't face leaving New York yet, so decided to put some time into her theatre career. After all she couldn't go home for some time; the attack upon Pearl harbour launched the US into the war, and non-essential Atlantic travel became near impossible. Joey made enquiries on Broadway, steering clear of the theatres that had been owned by her previous enemy, and very unsure of her reception. This time, however, she was surprised to find several doors open to her, and she was able to choose roles that challenged her and was soon happy back in the theatre world, sometimes feeling as if she had never been away. 

She worried about the news from home, and had to face the fact that she was considered by the media as having run away. Even some old friends seemed to think that, and Joey was hurt by letters asking why she had done it, why she hadn't stayed to help her own country. She had to balance those however with her own knowledge that she had done all that she could, and was following expert advice as to how she could help her country best. Hard as it was, she needed to ignore other people and their opinions.

\---

It was a dislocating experience, being in America once the war had begun. The troops were beginning to be seen more and more before they left for Europe, and there were restrictions on travel, yet very little impact on supplies or daily life. Joey felt terrible when she read about the shortages and rationing in the UK, and sent as much as she could over to her friends and family, as well as contributing to packages sent to Allied soldiers. However it was never possible to do much, for space on ships was at a premium, and many others with relatives overseas were doing the same.

The months passed slowly, and her run in the current show came to an end. She'd avoided making any further plans, since she had a vague idea that she might be able to get home once the first wave of troops had gone; But the journey was becoming no less dangerous or difficult to justify, so she knew that she had to decide on her next role soon. There were many other shows on Broadway, and she knew that she couldn't wait much longer before giving an answer to various producers about whether she wanted to join them. There was also a niggling story that wanted to make itself felt, so she was tempted to take some time out and give in to the characters within her mind.

It had been a long run, and as the last few days drew closer, Joey was feeling more and more tired after each show. This evening she was sitting in her dressing room after the performance, removing her make up and thinking, when there was a knock on the door, and a stage hand passed her a note. It was from an army officer, asking to see her once she was finished, emphasising that it was to help the war effort. She frowned, for she didn't recognise the name, but she didn't want to turn down a request for help if she was needed, so agreed, and the stage hand went off to direct the US army officer to the stage bar.

She entered the room and looked across to the officer with a polite smile, then forgot herself completely and half leapt across the room.

"Evvie!! Why on earth didn't you add your name to the message? I nearly said no!"

Her friend grinned and accepted the embrace Joey launched upon her, then stepped back and looked at her friend. Joey really had changed, she was much older in appearance and movements. The old friend was still there, and she was glad to see that Joey was as welcoming and friendly as ever. The photos and newspaper articles about "Singer Josephine Wilson" sometimes seemed a long way away from the open caring person Evadane had known for so many years.

"George didn't want to use our connection, he said that if you wouldn't answer a member of the armed forces without an old friend's name there, you wouldn't be the type he was looking for..." Evadane replied rather cryptically, and Joey turned her attention to the young man beside here, who was looking affectionately resigned to Evvie's indiscretion.

"Good evening, Miss Bettany" he said, extending a hand to shake and standing respectfully until she had sat down beside them. "I appreciate you agreeing to meet me, and I do hope you don't mind me asking Evadne to keep quiet about our visit. We enjoyed the show immensely."

Joey thanked him and the little group settled initially to some general chatter about friends old and new. She was intrigued as to the relationship between the two, and was not at all surprised when Evadane, unusually shy, showed her an engagement ring. They pair seemed very relaxed and natural with each other, and Joey was glad for her old friend, for she clearly loved the young officer, and from all that she could tell, he returned the favour.

"I'm still intrigued as to why you arranged this meeting, if it wasn't for Evvie and I to catch up?" she ventured eventually, since neither of her visitors seemed about to bring the subject up. "May I ask why you wanted to see me?"

The pair looked at each other, then George began to speak.

It past 1am before Joey reached the privacy of her bedroom, and she sat on the bed for some time before changing, staring at the wall. There was a lot to think about, and it was no easy decision she had to make.


	14. Chapter 14

The main request had been an apparently simple one, to join a group of entertainers raising funds and awareness again, only this time as part of a US funded group, and passing through many different countries, in fact a selection of separate tours. That in itself would have been a simple decision, for she was not one to refuse to help if it were at all possible to do so, and she knew that the UK war office was not recruiting new entertainers at present. It was the unspoken background suggestion that gave her pause. George had moved the discussion to a more private venue before opening up about the fact that she was a particularly desirable volunteer because of her language skills. 

Joey was confused, for the implication from his guarded words was that he was part of a secret service type organisation, but surely he wouldn't have taken his fiance into his confidence if that were true? It wasn't until they had been talking for some time that Joey realised the truth, although no explicit acknowledgement was made. Evadne was almost as good at European languages as Joey, after so many years at the chalet school and living in Austria.

There had been some suggestion in the past about Mr Lannis being involved in espionage, but Joey had never really paid it much heed. However Evadne was no fool, and she had skills of great use to her country and the intelligence to be able to use it. 

As Joey was to find later, she had been involved in 'special operations' almost immediately from school. Although George was taking the lead role in the attempt to recruit Joey, it was clear that Evvie was was not just there as his fiance, they were both deeply involved in "paying attention to conversations" and "being aware of public opinion" as George put it.

Joey was able to read between the lines quite easily, knowing Evvie as she did, and she understood early on that this conversation tonight was the beginning of something quite different to her last tour, where her only focus had been entertaining the soldiers. There were clear suggestions of entertaining civilians, of spending time in foreign diplomatic circles and non military areas. She was later to find that it wasn't usually war zones that she would visit at all. For example, there was a lot of concern about whether certain South American countries were more involved in the war than expected, and part of her first role would be to 'tour' these areas and report on anything useful that she found.

On a personal level she was someone who really needed to be doing something worthwhile, and interesting. This collection of tours would surely fulfil both of those things, but she was sure from the guarded conversation that evening that there was more to the request than simply using her talent, and that part was not as simple. Joey was still fiercely patriotic, but also sympathetic to the fact that the 'enemy' was made up of people, who were not necessarily all evil. She already knew some of the people that she had been to school with were technically on the opposing side in this terrible war. There would also be many people in non warring countries who might well not be sure who was in the right on either side. Could she really inform upon other human beings, knowing that it might affect their lives irrevocably, even lead to death for them? She wasn't sure.

She was also a naturally open and honest person, and to get the kind of information that she was sure would be required might well involve pretending to be attracted to people that she would never normally grace with her time, playing a part of socialite actress and singer that was very different to her true self. 

Another worry was she could see the possible pressure that the job might put upon her. She couldn't tell people what she was doing, so her actions could well seem self serving and unpatriotic, as well as the risk she was taking that she be discovered and harmed without being able to contact those she loved. 

In addition she knew that many Austrians and Germans had moved to South America between the wars, often for very valid reasons, and before the Nazi regime. She would potentially be informing on people who were not that different from her old friends, who might be misled, act out of loyalty to country and family.

She was very unsure whether she could really be any good at espionage, but if she were able to do it she saw the sense of her involvement. In fact it emerged that the plan had been suggested in part because of her unique skills and her famous name. There couldn't be many entertainers with such a wide range of languages as her, and with the experience and intelligence to play the part required. She was well versed in European history and culture, and was able to understand the politics and people's motivations more than many of her compatriots.

If she refused then could she live with herself if this war went on and on? There might well be information that she alone could find which might shorten the course of the conflict. Yet could she really justify the deception that would be involved by the possible end results ? Could she bring the results of the possibly negative press upon her family, without being able to explain to them the real reason for the tours?

That night she dreamt of Phil, for the first time in months, and she woke even more confused. She had almost convinced herself the evening before that her convictions and caring nature would be incompatible with the hardness she would require in this potential role. Yet every day more people like her gentle Phil were dying, and if she could help in any way to shorten the war she felt that she had to at least try. She decided that there was nothing else she could do but accept, and see where this latest route took her. She contacted George and agreed to the suggestion, then arranged for her belongings to be put back into storage, and waited for more information. 

She was grateful to hear that Evvie was travelling with the group, as a general Aide to the performers, and secretly to facilitate transferring any messages. Joey was worried to realise that she was not to know whether other performers were charged with a similar mission, but understood the principle. The more people who knew of the espionage roles, the more risk of being exposed or being unable to get useful intelligence from the people they were to meet. She would never have expected this turn of events, but now that her direction was set, she determined to follow it with the wholesale enthusiasm that she gave to everything she did.

\---

The next few years passed in a blur for Joey. Her work in South America was initially exciting but quickly became routine, even a bit boring, despite the exotic locations. However, she was glad to be doing all she could, and willing to put up with a lot if it was helping the war effort, however indirectly. She was fascinated by the difference in how things were handled in the countries they visited. Most were trying to remain neutral, often due to having large German populations, but also for trade and economic reasons. 

There were people from opposing nations, having to all work side by side to ensure supplies and as many advantages to their own side, but also not be too obvious, for with such a large scale conflict elsewhere, countries had to a difficult balance to maintain, to maintain their neutrality. Various of the people she talked to on the tour were selling goods to both sides, something Joey found quite hard to reconcile with her personal beliefs.

It was Evvy who helped her to understand, reminding her that they knew people within Germany and Austria that they cared for, and if people in places like Chile or Argentina had German heritage, but Allied heritage too, they would struggle to chose one side over the other. Joey understood, but it still felt as though money was more important than principle, that it supported the way that the Nazi's had behaved in Austria at least. She struggled to realise that the media propaganda of both sides had led to some people mistrusting the reports, others thinking that the Allies were wrong in their handling. Plenty of history of persecution and wrongful acts on all sides made a choice of side far harder than it was when living in Britain or America.

It wasn't until she had travelled around the more mixed regions, and talked to people, that Joey regained the cosmopolitan attitude of her youth. Seeing the way news was portrayed in local papers, compared to the just as biased military and Allied press helped her to understand better. Her own experience at the hands of the press had made her realise that the papers and even the government reports were not always correct. In fact in certain areas she knew well enough that there would be a skew towards the Allies, and witnessed the censorship and propaganda efforts of her own side. She knew that some people had enough information to be making a choice, but most people had no reason to know they were getting false pictures of the situation.

News from home continued to keep her going, but with the way that she was moving about, she rarely received any letters until months after they were sent. Rosalie was one of her most dedicated correspondents, and Joey carried with her an ever growing pile of photos of the triplets at various stages, as well as descriptions of their exploits. 

The photos didn't show much difference between them to begin with, but it soon became clear that they were not identical in looks or character. Len and Margot had remained red haired, although Len was apparently tending to the fairer side, but Con was becoming darker by the day. Little Len's adventurous spirit was evident, and Joey chortled at the description of her climbing out of her cot. Margot was apparently the more delicate of the three, which worried Joey, for she heard more about Margot's coughs and colds than she felt was normal, even with her limited knowledge of young children.

Evvy was a great comfort, for she reminded Joey of happier days, and of home, but without the closeness that could have brought on home sickness. She had seen more of Evvy's fiance now, and she could see the young couple were well suited. It worried her slightly however that he seemed to almost court risk, and often disappeared for months at a time without warning.

Evvy took it to be an inevitable part of his secret service life, but Jo wondered on occasion, for he would get restless on only a few days leave, almost as if he could not bear the stability.

One day she was packing to move on to the next city when the postbag arrived. She saw that some letters for Evvy had become mixed up in with her own, and took them across to her. Some instinct made her stay longer than normal, and she was thankful that she was there, for Evvy buckled, and let out a squeak that in other circumstances would have been funny. The way her face had drained told Joey that this was no laughing matter, and she leapt forward to support Evvy and guide her to a chair.

George had been on one of his many missions, and apparently been shot down. There were no survivors, with eye witness reports of the crash very clear that there could have been no escape.

The pain of the loss for Evvy had been Joey's first thought, but she was surprised to see that after the first shock, her friend seemed to accept the news quite calmly. As the weeks went on however, she became more and more concerned. Evvy had decided quite definitely that George was simply very deeply undercover, and must have had to disappear. The fact that he never had told her the details of his missions made this quite possible, but Joey worried that Evvy was setting too much store on George reappearing out of the blue. She went brightly about her duties and refused to get involved in any of the funeral arrangements, until Joey at least convinced her that she might risk George's cover if she did not attend. Joey hoped for Evvy's sake that he was really undercover. However she knew inside that as the months went on, the chance of that became less and less. Apart from respect to George's family, if it really were to turn out to be true, she wanted her friend to know that she had attended the funeral, been present to say goodbye.

After that, all she could do was keep Evvy busy, distract her and look out for any signs of the situation changing. They had plenty to do, for the tours were a success, both artistically and in terms of information collection and political influence. Joey's natural charm and ability to speak so many different languages really made her an asset, for she was able to make and keep contacts from all areas. She laughed off the repeated suggestion that at the end of the war she ought to marry a politician, for she would be an asset to his career. Evvy used to occasionally grumble that they never seemed to even consider that Joey be a politician herself, because she was female. Joey just laughed, she knew that wasn't the life for her. She was enjoying the tours, but right from the start the lack of artistic challenge bored her.

It was a letter from Bride that actually gave her the solution to her boredom. She was grumbling about having to 'sheepdog' a new girl, and mentioned in passing that the girl was 'Lavender' from the Lavender Laughs travel series. Joey pondered for a while, for she didn't want to just copy another author's idea, also she had found the Lavender Laughs series quite awful apart from being a way of presenting the world to young girls. 

The tour had short breaks every few months, and with time on her hands between shows the writing bug began to call even more insistently. Soon enough, Evvie was resignedly arranging for removal of ink stains on hotel furniture and helping Joey find writing materials and eventually a lightweight travelling typewriter. The gap left by Lavender's aunt being called up worked in Joey's favour, and she easily found a publisher. Her much more realistic, higher quality stories were a success, and this time her own fame added an extra level to the sales, despite still using her real name for the writing, rather than her stage name. The newspapers back in Britain still dropped occasional hints about her travelling around instead of helping the war cause, and Joey was on occasion frustrated at their portrayal of her. It wasn't until she mentioned this to Evvy, that she realised the media stories were a necessary part of her cover.

"If you were too obviously patriotic, we wouldn't be able to get you to the same type of parties and shows" Evvy explained. "The war office is keeping the little hints of your mixed sympathies alive, but they won't let it get too far Joey. I'll make sure of that"

Joey worried sometimes, for she appreciated her friend's offer, but doubted that she really had enough power an influence to really intervene. Luckily for Joey, she had underestimated the power and influence of both Mr Lannis and Mr Flower, who were deeply involved in the secret war effort. She came under mild suspicion, but as time went on and her books and music career went from strength to strength, the rumours became less, and she was able to relax about people at home misunderstanding her actions. So Joey's war continued, and while she wondered about her friends and family, the world of the Chalet School seemed very far away most of the time, and Joey rarely had time to feel homesick.

\---

Meanwhile, Phil's war was plodding on, in that way that endless routine days with very little changing will tend to do. He had some idea that months and years were passing, and there were letters from home eventually. However his brain was taking so long to recover anywhere near it's previous state that he sometimes wished that he hadn't been discovered, that his sisters didn't try to contact him. He would read their letters and never be quite sure if he was remembering things or imagining them, and their obvious love for him was a worry in itself. The pre war Phil Graves seemed to have been quite a strong and confident man, and Phil didn't really feel that he could ever match up to this person, ever really be a doctor again. He could tell that he had been medically trained, for when it came to any emergencies in the camp he went into an auto-pilot mode, seemed to just see what to do, although if someone had ever questioned him he could not have explained how he knew. Thankfully his skill showed through, and the men were just glad to have someone to ask about things when the camp medics sent them away or gave questionable treatment plans, if any.

His friend and ally John was a constant help, and Phil was glad to see that his sister's letters seemed to cheer John up, however much his friend insisted that he was only keeping the correspondence up to help Phil with his memory. In private Phil slightly hoped that his friend and sister might become closer, for he could think of no better man than John Marjorybanks.

So the war went on for both of them, with little to distinguish days from one anther until the conflict seemed to reach a changed state, and suddenly they were transported off elsewhere, and the letters from home dried up, were rarely able to get through. The prisoners hardly dared to hope that this was because their side was winning, but rumours flew around the camp whenever anyone new arrived, the soldiers taking heart from the news that the Americans had joined the war, and that the fear that the US would take Germany's side was groundless. On a personal level, the return of Phil's memory was still patchy, but he began to hold more of recent events in his brain, be able to know that he was missing something. It wasn't until he caught John talking to a new prisoner about hiding the pin up picture of Joey that Phil realised that his friend had been trying to spare his feelings. He began to be convinced within himself that he must have dreamt the connection with this woman, and the pain of seeing her face became less, for at least she was a pleasant memory, false as he believed it to be. He even joked on occasion about his memory of his "girlfriend" the famous singer.

Mostly there were not enough changes in routine to trigger his memory much, so he struggled still with trusting which memories were dreams and which reality. It became simpler to see the camp as the only true reality. One day however, he was surprised to overhear a name that seemed familiar, when a new prisoner was talking about his young sister being at the Chalet School taught by a Miss Wilson. 

Captain Arnett was surprised and slightly suspicious to begin with to be questioned about his young sister's school, but then understood. The combination of names and facts began a gradual linkage of facts within Phil's brain. The young man didn't know much more, other than confirming names Phil asked about. Yes, there was a doctor Maynard was closely associated with the school. Yes, the school had been in Austria previously, then Guernsey. Yes, the name Joey was familiar, his sister always used to talk about a head girl called Joey Bettany. No, he didn't know if Joey Wilson was the singer, but he would try to ask when he next could contact his sister...

Chalet School, Doctor Maynard, Joey Bettany, Joey Wilson, Russell, Chalet School, Bettany, Maynard. Joey Bettany, Head girl...

The words began to haunt Phil, and he wasn't sure whether to pursue the memory, or treat it as a dream. It would hurt too much to find that the kind face of his dreams really was nothing to do with him, now that he had convinced himself that she was simply a singer, a pin up girl. 

Still, he couldn't help but hope, wonder slightly, and so he began to crave an end to the war, to a time when he could perhaps freely answer his questions. Or if Britain lost, to be sent to oblivion, for this limbo as a prisoner was beginning to feel never ending. If he had thought about it more deeply, he would have realised this to be a good sign. When he was at his most ill, he could not cope with the idea of life outside of the POW camp, life with decisions and people expecting things of him other than to behave in an orderly way. Now the very fact that he wanted an end to the war showed signs of beginning finally to live again, to have hopes and dreams, and to know the truth of his memories.

Joey. Chalet. Austria. Maynard. Joey. Chalet. Austria. Maynard. Joey. His Joey? He didn't know.

Back in Armishire, the war passed without a lot of drama. Rosalie had a short period of worry when Jack was missing in action, but mercifully quickly she had the reports of his return and recovery. The weeks where she didn't know what had happened to him however had awakened a deep fear of financial instability in Rosalie, and she began to plan feverishly for the triplets and their future. 

She was still fiercely proud however, and as the triplets began to approach nursery age Madge was in a quandary, for she wanted to offer places for the girls as soon as they were old enough, but neither Jack nor Rosalie would hear of reduced fees. It wasn't until a terrible time when Hilda, Nell and Dolly Edwards were injured in a bus crash that a solution presented itself.

Madge had been able to step back into being headmistress while the others recovered, glad that the children were all old enough and healthy enough to not need too much of her time. 

However it made her realise quite how much paperwork the school now had, and she eventually pleaded with Rosalie to help her wade through the mountains of red tape. Rosalie was glad to help, bringing the triplets with her to the school and secretly loving the way the girls all flocked around them. It was almost like the girls had a hundred young aunties, for they were forever being loved and looked after by adoring fans. 

Once the heads returned, Madge saw a way out of a few problems, and suggested to Rosalie that she stay on part time as secretary. The young Mrs Maynard worried to begin with, for almost all of the mothers she knew no longer worked, but it proved to be the best thing for her and her girls. In having a purpose outside of the triplets, she became less anxious, less sure that every sniffle or graze was terrible and a risk. Margot, who had begun to learn that sniffles and headaches got her extra attention, found that the ploy no longer worked. She returned to the bouncing bette of a girl she had been before, and the matter of their future fees became a far lesser worry.

As Madge said firmly, it was an established benefit in boys schools that the children of the staff had discounted rates, and she wasn't going to do any less for her staff. A reasonably safe bet for her, since few of her staff were likely to return to work with school age children, unlike school masters, since it was rare for women to continue to work as teachers after their marriage.

So Rosalie became an established pillar of the school, and felt almost as if she hadn't been away. Jack was glad to see the change in his wife when he returned, and despite the unconventional situation of her as a working mother, he knew it was right for her, and even for the triplets, for they were becoming sociable little souls, and far more used to strangers than most children their age. 

As he was spending so much time on sick leave at the moment, he was glad for the income as well, although he would never have admitted to anyone that their financial situation had been slightly rocky. All round the plan seemed to help, and when first Nell Wilson and then later Hilda Annersley returned to take up the roles of Headmistress again, they were thrilled to have her back. 

Madge was happy to see thing work out so well, for it had been a risk to even suggest it, the younger woman could be quite touchy if given the chance. The situation in fact had added benefits for the girls, for Rosalie was quite simply gifted in organisation, and her only problem had been confidence and insecurity about truly being considered part of the Chalet School family. This had made her nervous and unable to trust her instincts, but with less time to overanalyse, she found even the child care became automatic in her. It had taken her returning to work to understand and know herself, and from that point she never looked back.

\---

Joey glanced casually over at the newsstand, as she always did to check the headline. After all of her experience with the media, she preferred not to get a paper regularly, mistrust having spread to active dislike of their bias. Still, it was useful to have an idea of what was going on, especially in her industry.

Today, however she was stopped in her tracks, and unable to move on for a moment. She took in the headline before carrying on into the studio. 

WAR OVER - ONE YEAR ON!!

The news blared from everywhere, now she had noticed it. Everyone seemed to be reading about it, talking about it. Joey couldn't quite believe it. Where had the time gone? It seemed just yesterday that she'd danced around a hotel room with Evvy at the news of VE day, and the fact of Britain finally seeming safe. Not long after, the slightly damper news of VJ day day. Not that it wasn't a relief, not that it didn't feel necessary, a firm end to the war. 

But Joey and Evvy were too involved with people in the military not to have some idea of how that victory had finally been won, of the total devastation of Hiroshima. That was when Joey's dislike of newspapers had begun to take a firm root. All around her people were celebrating, and rightly so, for their war was over, their sons (and some daughters) were coming home. Yet the little knowledge Joey had through her War Department contacts told her that the full story was rarely being told, the pictures were only of those things that suited the national mood. Evvy was more sanguine about it, tried to explain the importance of national morale, of the security and protest issues if people knew too much, but Joey could tell that it wasn't something her friend believed in as strongly as she had to present. Joey knew now how often the walls really did 'have ears' and she understood enough to stop having the debate, to simply make her own stand, stop buying papers on a regular basis.

Joey wondered whether to break her rule and buy one today, it seemed like the day needed to be marked in some way, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. The war was over, and she was happy, for in the end she had lost very few of her family and close friends. She was still saddened to realise that some of her school mates were untraced, likely dead. It was a dangerous time to show sympathies with German or Austrians other than refugees, so she had to rely on news from home, scan lists of those known to have been in a concentration camp or have been taken prisoner by the Allies. She had to ultimately accept that she might never know what had happened to those happy schoolgirls and their families. The knowledge of Herr Marini's death had hurt deeply, as had those others that were known to her, had been figures of her schooldays, people she had somehow expected to always be around.

Even without buying the paper, the headline had it's impact. It made her stop and think, reflect on the past few years, and once again she realised just how many experiences she had had, how much her life had changed, how her path seemed to wind ever further from that little chalet in Austria. 

The tour had served it's purpose, and the information gained had been hugely useful in bringing about the final days of the war. Joey felt she had done more than her duty, and was looking forward to some time following her own path. 

Her escape from the monotony of the hotel rooms into writing again had brought her yet another successful career option, and financial security, but now she had been hooked by performing and she wanted a new challenge if at all possible. 

With no specific reason to stay in America, she had almost decided to return, take an offered role in the West End, when another chance meeting with Roy and Walt Disney bore fruit. They had also been involved in working in an under cover way in South America, touring to get material for propaganda films. Walt had been encouraged to watch one of her performances, and once again had seen how perfect she was for some of their peacetime projects too. Joey had never been much interested in films or the cinema, but she did have a soft spot for Disney, and soon enough, she found herself at their studios, and first appearing in live action films in small parts, then getting involved in voice work. 

Here she found her true vocation, for she loved the challenge of imagining a character and getting an emotion across in her voice when it would be many months, if not sometimes years before she could see the animation matched to her efforts. She liked the fact as well that the job relied on her voice, not her looks, for she disliked the media obsession with appearance, and when her live action films began to be released, she hated seeing herself on screen. However she was not to be left alone to simply do voice work, for the public had warmed to her film roles, demanding more in a way that bemused her, but thrilled her slightly at the same time. 

To have been a 'puckish' sickly child, and now to have people wanting to watch her work, emulate her looks and find out all about her - well even Joey struggled to resist a feeling of pride and enjoy the limelight. Even while she continued with voice work, it soon became clear that she would not be allowed to hide in a recording studio. She already had records released, and the new public awareness of her made their sales soar. She knew the fickleness of the theatre, and so she saved her money carefully, although still sending gifts and scarce goods back to England, especially presents for her nieces, nephews, and the triplets. 

The next stage of Joey's career had amplified her fame and happened almost without her realising, for she suddenly had a new role, new persona, that of move star. Not being that interested, she had missed the way the media had begun to follow every little detail of those in the film industry, how obsessed the public were becoming with the new stars coming through the studio system. 

She had no real idea of how much this part of her career would put her into the public eye, and at the moment was just happy enjoying the new challenge. She still missed home, but was too busy to really consider a trip back yet, and she wasn't totally clear how welcome she would be. 

There were many famous people trying to restart lives within the post war Britain, and the mood seemed fickle, people needing a distraction from the fact that so many had been lost, and from the fact that supplies were still so short that rationing continued to be enforced. Joey sent all that she could over, and was always glad for news from home, finding the letters from Rosalie a great comfort in moments of homesickness. 

Evvy had become a close friend over the years, and Joey was glad to be able to be there for her when the reality of her fiance's death hit home. As the months after the end of the war passed, Evvy had watched the mail deliveries like a hawk, sure that now she would have contact, now he could let her know that it had been a mission. It wasn't until over a year later that she began to have to accept that he was gone, that he would be unlikely to still be undercover now. 

Although it did happen, usually there would be some internal news, her father was so senior in espionage circles that he would have had at least some idea if George was still on a mission. She broke down, had to take leave, and Joey did all she could to distract her, suggesting she stay with Joey, keep her company, but knowing all the while that it would not be enough. Evvy was someone who had a vocation for her work, and sure enough she returned to espionage, and gradually began to smile again, though Joey would bet that she still scanned the handwriting on letters for many years to come "just in case".

\---

Back in the UK, things had settled down relatively quickly. The school and extended family gave thanks for the safe return of so many of their loved ones, and held memorial services for those who had died or were missing. 

Jack returned to work at the San, Rosalie continued to work part time at the school, and the Triplets grew at that extreme rate that only happens at their age. They chattered now and enjoyed being petted and loved by so many of the staff and girls, becoming so much a part of the Russell and Bettany family that they considered themselves cousins to them. 

Bride and Jacky even had moments of jealousy, confused even more by the mixed emotions when their parents returned and they had to leave their aunt's household. They were sunny little souls usually, but both could on occasion be heard reminding the girls that they were not 'real cousins' until Madge caught them and had a word about it. Bride especially was ashamed, for she had been treated in a similar way by Sybil when they were younger, and once Madge had explained that it upset the Triplets, for they didn't have many of their own relatives, Bride was more welcoming to the little girls. 

Margot and Len continued to be fair, while Con darkened to black hair, staying shorter than the other two as well, leading to people sometimes assuming her to be their younger sister. Madge was pleased to look after them wherever possible, she had known their parents so long and so well that they really did feel like nieces and nephews. As all relatives do, she couldn't help but have a slight favourite, although she would never show it. Margot made her laugh, with her constant energy, and Len was a comical little soul, always looking after her sisters even at her young age. But the one that caught Madge's heart the most was Con, for with her small size, dark hair and serious little eyes she reminded Madge of a young Joey. It made her miss her younger sister and wish for her return, proud though she was of Jo's success overseas.

Robin and Daisy initially returned to live with Madge after the war, but in the end they missed the Triplets, and were always over with Jack and Rosalie, finally drifting back to living there most of the holidays. Jack and Rosalie were please to have them, and they were a great help with the girls. The little family bumbled along, a happy chattering group most of the time.

Jack and Rosalie didn't actively try for any more babies, feeling that three was plenty, unless God gave them more. They knew how blessed they had been to even have these children, and treasured them, gave them every attention and advantage they could have, while still sticking to Jack's determined view of "absolute obedience". 

Rosalie sometimes would have pampered the girls more, but she saw the sense in the rule, so abided by his wishes, being very glad for it when the girls seemed to listen and behave far more than some children did. Jack was a quiet man, and mostly left the decision making about the children to his wife, but he was adamant that the girls always be respectful to their mother and obeyed immediately, without question. Once any immediate danger had passed, he always explained to them the reason for the order, but he expected them to do as they were told without question until that point. He was too scarred by the loss of his nephew after disobeying a direct order not to do all that he could to bring them up that way.

With love and strict boundaries, the Triplets blossomed, and to Rosalie's delight, all three were book lovers even before they could do more than look at the pictures or be told a story. "Aunty Jo's" books were a real favourite, for in the UK editions they were illustrated by Polly Heriot, a close friend of the family, and she quite unashamedly used the triplets and some of their friends as a model for the children in the books. 

Rosalie became used to cries of "Again", "More" and "Want Polly books". Unfortunately, in the way that children have of remembering only those they saw often, the figure of "Aunt Joey" had little interest to them, so in their minds the books were not only drawn by "Aunty Polly", they were HER books. If Jo had been nearby then all around would have made more of an effort to correct this, but as it was it was no one really thought much of the name, and the girls no longer calling them "Aunty Jo's books", especially as J was a hard letter for them to say for some reason. Their father in fact had become used to being teased by all around and called "Yack", from various attempts of his daughters to copy their mother's name for him, and was just glad that they seemed able to make the "Po" sound of the word Polly - as he joked, at least they would be able to call a policeman if they needed to!

It was only Madge who was upset by what had happened, and insisted on the girls being corrected, until finally, to please her, the little girls began to call them the "PollyYoey" books, and with this she had to be content.

\-------

Hilary Burn had anxiously waited for the end of the war, and had almost convinced herself that Nancy would call their relationship off now, especially since she had a government job and would have to stay living in London for at least the next few years. She had worried needlessly, for the cheery Wren that she visited could barely wait until they were in private before holding her close and saying how much she had missed her. 

Nancy kept to her oath, not telling even Hilary about her time as part of the Bletchley park operation, but Hilary gained enough hints to realise that there had been a reason for Nancy's apparent coldness and although it hurt to know that there was a secret there, she respected the importance of keeping wartime secrets, so didn't press too much. 

Their paths were still not easy, for Nancy's new role within the civil service made it almost impossible for her to move near to the school, and Hilary was unsuccessful in getting a new job in London. So many women who otherwise would have married by then were without their fiancés, so they continued to teach, and there were many games mistresses for schools to chose from. 

Worse was to come. Hilary had been shocked, to begin with, when she had oblique comments about her loyalty, until she realised the cause. At the few interviews she was able to get the conversation always seemed to come back to the Austrian address of her school. She later found that there were rumours about the Chalet School being friendly with the enemy. 

Angry as this made her, she had to bite her tongue. It was too soon after the war to try to break through those prejudices. However she just couldn't find any new post, nor could Nancy move.

So for now they had to be apart, visit each other whenever possible, and continue to hope that something would come up, either for Nancy near the school, or Hilary near Nancy. They'd taken Rosalie and Jack into their confidence, after Rosalie found Hilary in near tears one afternoon, and their friends proved to be a godsend, for they provided a space to meet without anyone questioning where Hilary had gone, and the idea that she was "helping with the Triplets" seemed quite reasonable to the other staff. 

There were occasional teasing comments about how late Hilary stayed out sometimes on her visits to the Maynard house, especially after she rescued the Heads and matron from being locked in a cupboard by an overenthusiastic girl mistaking them for burglars. The lateness of the hour she returned that day was a topic of staff room gossip for some time, and several mistresses speculated that she was actually out meeting a young man. However since Hilary simply smiled sweetly when questioned, the gossip gradually wore itself out.

-


	15. Chapter 15

The end of the war had been a mixed blessing for Phil. He was as glad as anyone for release, and had several fearful moments as the end nearer, for none of them were sure how their guards would behave once the war was over, whatever the result. However 8 months after the end of the war, Phil stood in his sisters' home in Bosherton, and was clutched by them, held tightly and fiercely by people he wished he properly remembered. 

He knew he loved them, that emotion had stayed strong, once he remembered who he was, but he felt he barely knew them. His sisters had wanted to tell everyone of his return, but they realised quickly enough that he still needed time, and only a few close friends were told initially, then as Phil became safe to practice again, his professional colleagues gradually learned the news that he was back. 

In the Maynard household, the knowledge of his being alive was a huge shock, although both were glad that he had survived. They couldn't understand initially why no one had told them, but as news of his mental state having been fragile came through the doctor's grapevine, they understood. 

Jack Maynard found out the Graves' new address, visited, and had a long talk with Phil, shocked to see how different his friend had become, how few pre war memories he had. He was at least able to confirm for Phil that he and Joey had been an item, although it pained him to have to tell the man that she had refused his offer of marriage, that the relationship had broken up before Phil's capture. However it was clear from the slight relief on his friend's face that it had been right to tell him. Phil tired easily when trying to remember things, and he wasn't ready for much detail, which Jack respected and moved the topics to recent medical developments. 

The visit helped greatly, if Jack had only known. Phil had feared that he had still been engaged to the girl, and that she would have possibly been waiting. He knew that he couldn't have offered her much real companionship in his present state, for the details of their relationship were like barely remembered dreams, and he was struggling to reposition himself in this world outside of the prison camp walls. However, he cheered up greatly after Jack's visit. The very fact that he hadn't made the situation up, that his dreams of Joey had been real gave Phil hope that he was not as far gone as he thought.

Jack made his way back home, torn as to his best course of action. He could see that medically his friend was sound, and in fact if it wasn't for the fact of not remembering pre war events he would never have thought him ill at all. Jack had kept things simple this time, with a promise to keep his return from Joey for now and come back to visit whenever possible. 

As he made his way home to Rosalie and their little family, he wondered whether to tell Phil more about Joey, about important details of their life together. Would it help or hinder? He didn't know.

\---

Joey smiled at her co-star's jokes, and nodded to other actors and crew as they passed. The producer motioned at her as soon as she escaped and tapped his watch, reminding her that she had a meeting with some newspapermen to promote the next movie. She smiled back, and later hid her irritation as the journalists steered constantly away from the character and story, and repeatedly asked her about her love life, and whether various rumours about her costars were true. 

It went against her nature to waste time on these types of thing, but she remained polite and friendly as always. She had learnt quickly that these little exchanges didn't take much, but they made life in the movie system much smoother. She was enjoying her career now much more than she had expected to, but as always the politics of the industry made her tired.

She knew what she needed to do in order to keep her audience happy, and the papers never had any material for negative publicity. However she struggled to keep up with the socialising that was expected, and knew that she ought to be going to far more parties than she was if she wanted to get better parts. She had been unable to hide her opinion of some of the shallower stars of the studio system, and that made it hard for casting agents to choose her, despite the fact that her talent shone out whenever she was included in a project. 

Her friends were sure that some of the stars were jealous, for her feedback was always so good. Her agent admitted that he thought the fact that she was also a writer and had a singing career made stars insecure even though she clearly tended more towards the character parts than the star roles. There was always a place for her with Disney, but they were tending back towards their animated films, so her input was mainly voice acting, or being filmed for animators to copy her movements.

She'd got into a more regular stream of work when she realised how much a little pandering to egos and socialising helped, and her agent was pleased to always have something to offer her. However the more interesting character parts kept getting given to others, and she realised that she was fast on the way towards becoming a leading lady. She was proud of this, until realising that it meant getting the same role over and over again, always with a bit of singing, some humour and a handsome love interest. She could tell that she was getting restive, and finally admitted to herself that she was ready for a break. 

It took some arranging, but she was determined, and so here she was, about to finish her latest project, and for the first time in a few years she didn't have another one planned. There were offers, but nothing excited her, and she stalled when her agent tried to press her for what she wanted to do next. She had resisted getting locked into long term contracts or multi picture deals. Like all agents, he was paid only when she worked, and was nervous when things quietened down.

She finished the last day of filming and went back to her rented house. She couldn't quite call it a home, lovely though it was; She had to admit it, there was something that didn't suit her about Los Angeles. The air was one thing, she had begun to get the odd chest infection again, and the heat was somehow a different kind of heat to that in the Tyrol. The people were friendly, and she knew that she was beginning to be successful, could chose which films she wanted to work on.

She had done her best to learn all she could over the past few years, for she loved the process of making a film, of seeing how the little snippets worked together into a finished product. She had overcome her dislike of seeing herself on screen, and now loved to go to the cinema once it was released, and see the people laughing, crying, or held captivated by the story. It appealed to both the performer and the writer in her, to be able to watch her own performance, see how to bring more to a character next time.

She enjoyed the quietness of her house, and the lack of chatter all around, and now that she was alone she felt a mixture of relief for some time off, and slightly empty, in the way she was to find finishing a film always made her feel. She invested so much of herself into the character that it was hard to switch back to real life. A thick envelope, opened to find a pile of letters from the UK brought back her smile, and she settled herself down to read them, coffee in hand and feet curled round beneath her.

\-------

Dearest Joey,

I hope that you're doing well, we all miss you as always, and hope that we will get to see you some stage soon. Your latest film is supposed to be being shown in Armiford, and we are planning a family trip to go and see it. So many of yours seem to have only been shown in America or large cities that it is a real treat to be able to all go to see you in something.

Everyone is doing well, and sends their love. Peggy, Bride and Jacky are all now living with Dick and Mollie of course - you should see the Quadrant, it has been decorated with all sorts of paraphernalia brought back from their travels. Quite a combination, but Mollie is so good at this sort of thing - it really does all work well together, and the children are loving having their own home. Sybil, Josette and Ailee are all doing well at school, and David is quite the grown up scholar now ! I do wish sometimes that you all wouldn't grow up so fast ! Daisy and Primula are happy too, although we barely see Daisy, she spends so much time at the Maynard house!

Jack and Rosalie's triplets are getting on well too, and started at the school recently - it made sense for them to go early, since Rosalie is working there anyway. She says that she feels she has the best of both worlds, for she can work and still see her girls often, and know that she is near if they need her, especially with Con still being a bit fragile. They are so sweet together - their mannerisms are so alike, and they finish each other's sentences now. Margot and Len have continued to be fair, but Con is dark as can be. She really is a funny little one. 

She always has her nose in a book now - often one of yours you'll be pleased to know! She has also started telling the other's stories apparently, quite good ones too, for Rosalie told me that she and Jack often can't resist sitting quietly outside their room and listening to them themselves. Perhaps we have another future author in our midst maybe !

Robin has decided against Oxford, as you know. I am proud of her, but I will let her tell you herself, for it really is her story to tell. She has included a letter to you in today's collection, and I hope you will be pleased for her, she still does look for your blessing in most things, you know. You'll always be her older sister !

Jem is very proud of his knighthood, thank you for the gift basket, it was a wonderful surprise. A most impressive collection of puns on the greeting card too! He said to tell you that you may as well get all those jokes out of your system now, so you can be polite about it when you come home. He is persistent as ever about that, however long you may be away he always talks about when you come home. He seems to need to feel that you will be back soon, however much I tell him that it is wishful thinking. You know we both miss you terribly, but we are proud of all you are doing. You did say that you were going to have an adventurous life, and you certainly are doing that, and I hope enjoying it all along the way.

I must leave you there, for I have some flowers to arrange for the church and need to check the fund raising efforts on Ernest Howell's behalf for new drains for the school. We aren't doing that well so far, and I fear that the repair options are just too intensive to be able to do in the holidays as he had planned. Quite what we will do I don't know! We can hardly have relatives of those at the San living in such conditions, not to mention the other girls starting to complain about the smell. The children from the village are already calling it the Smelly School, and that isn't an image we want to be putting forward!

With all love,

Madge

\---

Hello there Joey!

Hope you are well, and looking forward to seeing your latest 'flick' soon! 

Gwensi, Beth and I managed to see your other two on a couple of trips to Cardiff, but they don't seem to come to the local cinemas that often sadly. 

I'm off soon, getting started on my way to medical school, wish me luck ! Everyone around me at school seems to think I'm mad to try to get through such a gruelling course, but Uncle Jem, Aunty Madge and Jack have been so supportive I'm sure I can manage it. 

David says that he's sure I can too, he's heading that way as soon as he finishes his National Service. He could have had an exemption, but he wanted to do his bit. Aunty Madge is just hoping he is out of there before he gets sent anywhere too dangerous.

I've included some pictures of the Triplets, they are growing up so fast now! It really has been like having little sisters, more so than with Primula as we were so much closer in age. I can baby these three to my hearts content. Margot and Len are tough little specimens, but Con is a bit more on the delicate side. She's had a few illnesses, and it's really brought home to me what I want to do once I am qualified. I may well change my mind, you know me and 'swithering' ! But do love children so much, and want to help, so if all goes well I am hoping to specialise in children's diseases.

Uncle Jem and Aunt Madge are a bit worried about the idea, they think it will be very hard for me to get training after university. I know it will be hard, but I really do think it suits me. Does that seem mad, when I could so easily get a training placement in general medicine or lung work with all Uncle Jem's contacts? I wondered also whether I ought to want to specialise in avoiding people going the way Mummy did, but I just feel that I need to be surrounded by a bit more LIFE, to be more at the beginning of things.

Also I do wonder whether my other brothers and sisters might have lived with better children's medical care available. This just feels like the right thing to do, even if it will be harder this way, take longer to earn a living. Does that make sense Joey?

Thank you for listening, I know you can't really answer me, but it does help to talk to someone outside the family sometimes,

Lots of love

Daisy

Xxx

\-----------

Dearest Joey,

I'm sorry that this is my first letter for a while, I have been very distracted recently, and I haven't wanted to write until a few more things were settled. I know you are very busy and I didn't want to worry you.

I've come to a decision, and I honestly don't know whether you will be surprised or not. I've felt a strong pull towards the religious life for the last few years, and I'm going to join a religious order next summer. Jem and Madge still want me to go to Oxford and try social work for a while, but I feel that all that will do is delay things. 

I did my year in Special Sixth in case, but as the months go on I just feel my call all the more strongly. I think I would feel differently if there was more need for me here, but much as I love the Triplets they are old enough now to be at school most of the time, and Rosalie has said that she thinks it unlikely that they will have any others. Even if she did, they will be fine without me, it is very different to having a few near to each other in age.

It is a closed order, so I won't be able to visit everyone much, if at all, which is partly why I am waiting until next year. I really wanted to try to save enough to come and visit you if possible, I don't feel that I can honestly go away without seeing my Jo at least for a short time, I have missed you more than I can say, even though Rosalie has been wonderful - she isn't you, isn't my sister, however strong a friendship we have built.

I hope you are enjoying things out there, and most of all you are happy.

With all my love,

Robin.

\---

There were other letters, notes from the younger members of the family, but nothing out of the ordinary. 

Joey stared off into space for a while after reading, and tried to work out what was upsetting her. She wasn't surprised about Robin, their relationship had been close even while she was away, and Robin's draw towards the religious life was obvious. Joey was surprised at the choice of a closed order, for Robin was so close to her family, but she understood the idea of giving up worldly connections.

Was it perhaps Daisy's thoughtless comment ? Joey knew that she had become almost a pen pal, and was less close to the girl than she would have been if she lived nearer, but the casual suggestion that she wasn't close enough to be involved was still hurtful. Combining that with the fact that she realised that she might have very little contact with Robin in the future made her feel alone for the first time in many years. 

The little snippets of information about the Triplets also showed her just how long she had been away. They seemed so far from the babies that she had left behind, and were clearly developing their own personalities. She tried not to focus too much on it, after all children did get ill, but didn't like the sound of Con's illness either, although she was sure that she would get the very best care with Jack and Rosalie. 

Thinking about the triplets made the idea of a holiday back home all the more tempting. They were growing so fast that if she waited they would be even less likely to have any connection with her. If Daisy was thinking of her as 'outside the family' the triplets and younger relatives would have almost no understanding of who she was. 

It took her a little longer to work everything out in her mind, for she was afraid that leaving now might mean she wouldn't be able to return to America, might have no chance to continue with her career. However the homesickness was too strong, and within the month she had made her arrangements, given up her lease and was on her way. With a spark of the old mischievous Joey, she swore all of her American friends to secrecy, and hoped to be able to surprise everyone.

\---

Phil stood at the doorway of the cottage, suitcase in hand, trying to look as though he was thinking through his next move, or deliberating on his best route to take. He knew his sister wouldn't be fooled, but he wanted to try at least to hide his panic, the fact that he was completely unable to lift his foot and cross the doorframe. Helen seemed to understand, for she gave him one last peck on the cheek, then went back into the house, shutting the inner door behind her. He relaxed slightly, mentally thanking her for her insight. He still had to make the move out of the house, but there was no rush, no one could see him having to wait until his body returned to his control.

He seldom had these sorts of problems now, but as he thought back to the difficulties he had had passing the threshold when he first returned, he realised that he ought to have expected some issue today, for he was entering unknown territory, taking another new step. He'd told himself the night before that he might have to be patient with himself while away, accept that he might not cope perfectly with everything. The fears that he had beaten into submission in his everyday life could still cause him confusion when he fell out of routine. He had warned Jack to expect the visit to be complicated, but his friend had been insistent that he come and meet his wife and young children. Phil had thought long and hard about whether to go, and decided that he had to start somewhere. Short visits to his friend John Margerybanks had gone well, but they had lived together in the POW camp for so long that Phil almost felt at home there, and it was important to challenge himself with going further afield.

So he wasn't surprised to be at the mercy of his brain, was used to being taken hostage on occasion by his fractured mind; But that didn't really make him feel much better - in fact it irritated him extremely that it had started before he even left the house. This was something simple, something he did every day, and didn't even think about. What was the difference now? He was going to visit some friends, have a short break away. He ought to be happy, looking forward to it. He'd enjoyed Jack Maynard's visits over the past few months, and they had forged a far stronger friendship than they had had before the war.

It still mystified Phil why Jack made such an effort with him, as he was becoming more and more sure that they had been no more than friendly colleagues before the war really. Possibly it was the connection to Joey Bettany, or simply a stronger bond now as he was a fellow soldier? Whatever their history, it was now a friendship that he wanted to keep, and a visit that he had been looking forward to for some months. If he didn't go, he feared that he would never manage to move on to any sort of normal social life, and that was the final impetus that pushed him off the step, down the path in a rush and then march almost fiercely down the road to the station.

\---------

Joey stood at the railing looking out as the quayside came ever nearer. She was slightly regretting her decision to make it a surprise that she was visiting the UK, for all around her people were excitedly craning the necks to look for their family and friends. It would have been nice to have had Madge and Jem there, or someone else familiar. Especially as surprise seemed unlikely now. She had apparently underestimated her fame in the UK; As soon as she stepped off the ship, she was surrounded by flashing camera bulbs and an eager young reporter asking how long she would be staying, what her next project would be, and whether she was worried about her reception after being away all through the war years. She had to bite back a retort, having learnt from long experience that responding to the snide comments about deserting her country simply fuelled the fire for a story. Thankfully more of the reporters seemed to just interested in taking photos and asking why she was there. 

A few questions from her manager confirmed that she had enough time to get to Howells before the story of her arrival would be printed, so Jo relaxed a little and answered a few questions politely. She made her way to the car arranged for her, and settled thankfully into the back seat, glad for the slight barrier between herself and the reporters.

"I did warn you that the plane would be better !" Her manager said, slipping into the other side of the car. "Less time for anyone to warn the press that you are on your way."

Joey smiled and replied that she might be doing well, but she wasn't made of money, and the boat trip had been a far gentler and more affordable start what was supposed to be a holiday. Her manager Mr Maclaren had been recommended by Mr Flower, and was far more used to money being no object than Joey was, so they often had debates like this - although in fact he was correct, she could have afforded the plane trip, and it would have enhanced her star status much more than a basic cabin on an ocean liner had done. 

He gave up for now, and concentrated on watching the countryside flash past. They were going to stop halfway and spend the night at a hotel, for he had managed to persuade Joey to meet with a casting agent for a British film agency. Although she didn't know it, the situation in California was becoming much more complicated, and actors were no longer protected by their fame, in fact they were more likely to attract attention of the government than ever before. Mr Flower had emphasised to the manager to try to find at least a temporary project in the UK. He had come to see Joey like a niece, and was determined that she would come to no harm through her loyal impetuous nature.

Joey was not interested in politics, and was fiercly patriotric to both her own country and her adopted home. Unfortunately her ability to get on with all different types of people meant that she had a mixed group of friendships. Some of these acquaintances and her ability to speak Russian were making her a potential target, either to be accused or to be asked to inform on others. The public and most of the stars involved didn't know it yet, but Hollywood was becoming a risky place to be for someone who would never break the trust of a friendship. Since she was English, she would have some protection, but even the suggestion of wrongdoing could ruin a career. 

Mr Maclaren knew his client wasn't a communist, but she was friends with a mixture of people who almost certainly were. So while Joey was determined that this was only a holiday, a visit back to her homeland, he was under strict orders from his original employer to steer her away from returning for at least a few years. Cornelia's father was influential enough to help up to a limit, but even he couldn't risk association with communists, however indirect. He had warning from his contacts that Joey was at risk, and he knew that the girl would never give up her friends, whether she agreed with their politics or not. If she could be encouraged to stay in the UK after this visit, that would be no bad thing for all concerned.

\----

Phil sat on the train, watching the station slide into view, and grinned to see Maynard there, hands in pockets, rocking back and forth slightly on his heels as he waited. Jack had always been someone who needed movement, and Phil's sister had remarked after his last visit that she didn't envy Rosalie, the man must be very hard on his socks, with all that restless foot tapping and resting on his heels. Something Phil would never have noticed, but once pointed out it was hard to miss.

He greeted his friend and was whisked away to a waiting car. They were some distance from the family home it seemed, which was a relief, for Phil had slightly dreaded being dropped straight into meeting the children, much as he normally enjoyed the company of youngsters.

He was glad to agree to a stop off for a drink at a pub halfway, although he soon realised, from awkward 'How do I start this conversation?' small talk and long silences, that Jack was obviously wanting to broach a difficult subject. Finally his friend managed to get his thoughts in order, and start out. 

Phil wasn't surprised to find that the issue was Joey Bettany, since Jack had been asking permission to let her know that Phil was alive for the past few months. He wished that he could say yes, but he was just not ready. How could explain properly the fear that grabbed ahold of him simply at the idea of having Joey back in his life, however remotely. He had spent so many of the years in the Prisoner of War camp dreaming about her, using her as a light to keep him going, even while he was sure that she was simply an entertainer that he had seen. 

Then to find out that he wasn't imagining the memories, she really had been close to him, the mystical safety figure of "Joey" had become slightly dangerous, in that she was a real person, was someone who knew him, and knew him well. She had apparently rejected him, according to his sister, and Jack had confirmed this, while at pains to explain that she was very young, had not been ready for marriage or a family at that time. 

He felt that she wasn't likely to want contact with him, and she lived in America, after all. But still, he felt protected by the safety net of his dreams, and a real living person could puncture that image, could turn out to be nothing like the protective guardian angel that she symbolised to him.

These weren't the kinds of things that Phil felt comfortable talking about, so he had avoided the discussions, tried to divert Jack from making him answer yes or no. However he realised now that he couldn't avoid the issue any more. As Jack explained to him, Rosalie and he were closely tied to Joey's family, and the information was sure to come out one way or another, now that he was visiting them and likely to be introduced to people. 

Neither of them really knew which of Joey's friends knew about their past relationship, so didn't know who might think to write to Joey about it. Hilary and Nancy had had to be informed, since they would be staying at the house for part of the visit too, although not right away. He was looking forward to seeing the pair, since he had positive, if vague memories of the cheerful couple. Neither of them were happy with having to keep the knowledge from Joey however, and Jack knew full well that if he didn't get Phil to agree, Hilary would surely try, and he didn't want Phil to have to fight that. If the man was determined not to tell, then Jack would make sure that the others respected that, but he hoped that it would be possible to have an answer ready before they even arrived.

Phil's sister had been trying to get him to agree to tell already. She hadn't really realised before just how serious the relationship had been, and although she would never say so to Phil, she feared that this mystical perfect woman would stop her brother ever fully healing and moving on to have a love and family of his own. He wished that he could explain to people how he felt, how the mental strength he had rebuilt still felt like a house of cards, and he just didn't know how important a pillar the idealised Joey Bettany was, whether he could afford to lose that card. It might be one that he could carefully but safely take out, with only a slight sag in the tower. Yet it could be the card that held the whole structure in place, and he didn't know if he could recover if the house fell to pieces again.

Finally, as they made their way back out to the car, he decided that his friends and family were right. He had to take the risk. He agreed to a letter being sent to Joey in America explaining his situation, and passing on his address. That at least gave him a few weeks to prepare, and as he said to Jack, the chances were that she wouldn't reply anyway, so there wasn't much risk of a problem. Jack didn't answer, focusing on starting the car. 

He had seen Joey after finding out about Phil's loss, and for all the fact that the silly girl hadn't wanted to be tied down, he was sure that she had loved Phil, and she would be shocked to the core by the news. He wished, not for the first time, that Joey was nearer, for he would really have preferred to be with her when she heard, even a telephone call would be better. But Graves was obstinate about the news being given by letter, so that he had time to prepare, and he had to respect his friend's wishes. 

They continued the journey in a comfortable silence, neither of them being men who talked for the sake of it, and soon enough they drew up in front of Plas Gwyn, Rosalie and the triplets standing waving at the door as soon as they heard the car putter down the drive. Phil couldn't help but smile as the triplets, brave enough to wave but suddenly shy afterward, hid a little behind their mother when they saw the new person. Three little faces peeped around either side of her skirts however, and soon enough little Len and Margot were asking him where he had come from, and demanding he answer all sorts of impossible questions. 

Con was quieter, and he was to discover that the family was slightly worried about her being a little slow in talking as clearly as the others. She seemed to have regressed slightly in confidence as well after her recurrent bouts of colds. Phil knew of this, and couldn't help but pick out her slightly fragile appearance next to her two bouncing bettes of sisters. She was clearly shyer than the other two, but when she finally pulled away from hiding behind her mother she smiled at him, and seemed just as pleased as the other two with his gift, a selection of his sister's old doll's house furniture.

The three of him were soon exclaiming happily over tiny pots and pans and miniature sweeping brushes, and showing him all around "Little Maids" their doll's house, a magnificent miniature of Jack's family home, which had been a present from Jack's brother the year before. Phil remembered many hours playing with his sisters and their house, so was soon thrilling the girls by making their dolls slide down the banisters and do cartwheels in the hallway. 

Jack and Rosalie exchanged a slight look with each other and both made a mental note to expressly forbid the girls from experimenting with sliding down the bannisters, now that the idea had been seeded in their heads. They didn't like to say so in front of Phil, in case it seemed like a complaint about his playing with the girls, but they recognised the glint in Len's eyes and flicker towards the hallway

Len had been the first to climb out of her cot, doing a neat forward roll over the edge, and she was always the first to try anything daring, only her naturally law abiding nature avoiding her rushing headlong from mishap to mishap. Jack and Rosalie had learnt early on that she felt protective towards her sisters, "After all, I'm the oldest-by-half-an-hour" being her favourite saying. So if Len was told not to do something, she usually wouldn't, accepting it in her sunny way. 

Margot was a more variable temperament and had occasionally tried to see how far the rules would stretch. Thankfully Rosalie was more than able to deal with her, so she learnt early on that tempers and tantrums did her no good. Con worried them in a different way. She lived in a part dream world, and didn't seem to feel much need to play with others the way that her sisters did. She had a vivid imagination and tended towards night terrors when ill, and had even been discovered out on the landing, eyes open but clearly asleep. Neither Jack nor Rosalie had much experience of dealing with sleep walking, so they weren't really sure what was best to do for the child.

That night, the excitement of the visitor and the new toys meant that the girls were all bubbling over and hard to settle to sleep. Finally they were dozing off, and Rosalie was able to join the others. In the hassle of trying to keep all three in their beds and quiet enough to doze off, she completely forgot about forbidding the bannister sliding. Thus it was that when Con awoke and wandered out into the hallway (heading away from the stairs thankfully) her sisters decided that the quickest way to go and tell Mummy and Daddy about it would be Uncle Phil's way of getting the dolls downstairs.

A quick tussle at the top of the stairs gave Len the first go, and miraculously she made it down smoothly and in one piece. Margot wasn't far behind, and very nearly made it, however she forgot to allow for the curve of the staircase, and the first the adults knew of this escapade was a shriek and a thud, as she tipped off onto the hall table, upsetting a vase of flowers and soaking Len as rushed to try to help her sister. This had the added effect of startling Con awake upstairs, triggering a further wail from above and leading to even more confusion as their parents rushed to the hall to see Margot and Len surrounded by water and bits of broken vase. From the weeping and wailing they could hear, they half expected to find Con in a heap on the floor downstairs as well, and spent many moments looking wildly around them trying to find her to comfort her. 

Phil was the first to realise, and without a thought for the fact that this was his friend's child and he barely knew her, his instincts as a doctor kicked in and he leapt up the stairs two at a time to comfort the little girl and check for injuries. His own sister had tended to sleepwalking when younger, so he knew well enough what to do, and with little fuss he steered her back to her bed, tucked her in and went in search of warm milk. Jack and Rosalie were grateful to hear that she was settled back down so quickly, for they were well occupied now in trying to get the girls cleaned and dried after their shower in plant water and bits of china, as well as checking for cuts and bruises. The girls had had a lucky escape, with only a few bumps and a small cut on the foot for Len when she had rushed to Margot's aid. Both girls were shocked enough by the events that Jack and Rosalie said no more about it that night, but tucked them in, also with hot milk.

As they said to Phil when they eventually returned downstairs, they had at least never promised a restful time - Jack had told him when arranging the visit that with three little imps of mischief around that was far too much to expect, although they had been hopeful for at least a mild respite from the mayhem. He grinned and assured them that it was the best ice breaker - or he supposed vase breaker - that they could have arranged, and he was happy to help.

\---

Joey was itching to be off the next day, excited now she was so near to her family and friends. The casting meeting had gone well, and she had promised to go and visit the studios, which were just starting to get organised again after the war and shortages. 

She had been impressed by their organisation, and it was refreshing to be able to exercise her wit and sense of humour. In America she had sometimes found it easy to offend, or to confuse people, so had tended to keep away from too much wordplay or similar. It would do no harm to visit them and talk about possible roles, she need not commit to anything, after all. 

The journey was a short one, and soon she was drawing up at the Round House, half bounding out of the car in her excitement. She wanted now to see Madge more than anything. She had missed her sister more as each year passed, and had never planned to be away from her for so long.

Unfortunately for Joey, her plan to surprise everyone had worked too well. Madge and Jem had taken all of the small fry off for the day, and only a rather shy Primula and another girl that Joey could hardly believe was her niece Sybil were at home. They'd both cried off the trip to Armiford due to high levels of prep, and were rather overwhelmed by this return of "Aunt Jo" without warning. They showed her into the room usually used for Madge to talk to guests, and Jo struggled to keep a straight face as they tried initially to entertain her with polite conversation, eyes all the while creeping towards the door at any sound that might mean their elders were returning.

Sybil gradually remembered her aunt properly, and began to chatter more, telling her all about the family and school, and Primula managed a few less strained looking smiles and comments. Jo realised for the first time just how long she had been away, for the girls were clearly growing up, very much people in their own right rather than just part of the nursery. She had quite forgotten that her nieces and nephews were now living at the Quadrant in the holidays and at school in term time, and contemplated going over to the school to see them. The way that the girls jumped at this idea told her how out of depth they were feeling, and she decided that she would go out for a while, not only to put them out of their misery, but to let them get on with their prep.

She really did want to surprise Madge if she could, so she swore the girls to secrecy and set off in the car again, trying to work out from the address given which of the nearby houses belonged Jack and Rosalie. If she had thought to ask, Sybil or Primula could have told her, but she couldn't help but see them as children, and didn't think to ask them. She knew that they assumed that she had gone to the school, but she didn't want to do that yet. Joey saw Nell and Hilda as part of her extended family, and somehow it was important that she didn't visit them before Madge. Jack and Rosalie were different, they were friends, and more like brother and sister to her now. As well she had missed the babies more than she ever admitted to herself.

-


	16. Chapter 16

Phil rubbed his forehead, and shook his head. He'd slept better than normal, but still felt slightly disorientated with his unfamiliar surroundings. After so many years in rarely changing confines of the prisoner of war camp, he now found new environments hard to process. Jack had picked this up, after watching his friend struggling with conversation the past ten minutes or so. He abruptly suggested Phil taking a walk, and Rosalie looked up in surprise, then quickly understood. She backed him up, and so it was that Phil was sent off into the woods with a basic set of instructions for route and a promise to send a search party if he hadn't returned soon. He laughed at this, and set off, the gentle light passing through the leaves already soothing his tired brain. The mild breeze and quiet woodland did the rest, and he was soon feeling far more himself, and ready to return to Jack and Rosalie's for lunch.

He saw the road just ahead and decided to take it back towards the house, rather than return through the peaceful tree tunnel, his hunger refreshingly more important to him than needing to be alone. He could almost feel his brain calming with the quiet time surrounded by the natural world. He hummed happily to himself, proud of being able to cope as well as he had done with the social side of spending time away, and glad to realise he could use exercise to settle his thoughts. 

\-----

Joey frowned as she looked at the mixtures of options heading off the main road. War time removal of the road signs had left some junctions completely unmarked. This still hadn't been dealt with here, for very few strangers needed the signs, and locals had forgotten that the signs had been there at all. 

She got out of the car and looked down some of the lanes, in the hope that a house might be visible. On one road, she saw a man walking in the distance, and started back to the car, deciding that the best option was to go to him and ask. However by the time she entered the roadway the man had apparently gone off on a footpath, or she had imagined him, for he was nowhere to be found. She decided that she may as well continue, for surely there would be a house somewhere along here. If not then she would go a few miles and turn back, give up her plan as a failure and go to find the school.

So Joey carried on, ignorant of the fact that she had not been mistaken. He'd heard the car approach and, suddenly insecure about talking to a stranger, stepped off into the wood, forging a new path in his haste to escape. Phil was striding unseeingly now through the wood. He was frowning again, annoyed with himself. He'd instinctively run away, even though he had no reason to think that the car would do anything but pass him. He would have coped with the possibility of being asked for directions when at home, and he dealt with patients all the time, what was wrong with him? 

He realised that the change of environment had made him feel quite fragile, taken him back a few months in his social state. The stability that he had fought so hard for was still only skin deep, and that made him sad and angry and afraid that he would always have this half life, this sudden need to escape from people without warning. He continued on his unseeing wander, lost in mind with his self recrimination and fear of the future. The light through the trees now seemed to cast only shadows, make his passage unclear, and he could feel a headache beginning, with the intense pain and disorientation that he had thought avoided with his earlier relaxing walk.

\---

Luckily for Jo, she had the correct route, and she was thrilled when the first house that she stopped at to ask for directions turned out to contain her quarry. She whooped and half leapt on Jack in welcome, and grinned at the visible jump and hastily muffled expletive on seeing her. It wasn't until a few minutes passed that she had some doubts. Even considering her plan to surprise everyone, Joey hadn't expected quite such a stunned reaction. He'd gone pale, something she had never seen on his face before, and for the first time she wondered about the wisdom of assuming that she would still be welcome here. 

She stepped back, feeling slightly shy, and this seemed to bring Jack to his senses. After a moment staring at her, then most strangely looking out past her at the garden, he returned her hug and welcomed her in, calling out to Rosalie to see who had arrived out of the blue. Joey was too pleased to see her friends to notice the depth of the shock on their faces, and too keen to see the girls again to complain when she was somewhat unceremoniously bustled away to the nursery. 

Rosalie shepherded her off to find the triplets, managing to grimace at Jack behind their guest's back, which he correctly interpreted as an instruction to keep Phil away until they had had a chance to talk. He swore again under his breath as he realised that he had no idea how long Phil would be, or how to find him. If he did find him, what could they do? Keep him away until Joey left? Talk to the pair and then introduce them?

Jack had never been happy with the idea of keeping Joey in the dark about Phil's return, but he knew that his friend needed to keep his own mental balance and it was his news to tell. Joey being in a different continent and having few mutual friends with Phil meant that Jack had felt that it was at least safe to wait a while. The chance of the pair meeting and news coming out in such a way had seemed so remote, now not only was a shock for Jo likely, it seemed that a meeting was almost inevitable.

\---

Joey followed Rosalie with bouncing enthusiasm, desperate to see the girls after so long. However, as she reached the door of the nursery, she found herself slowing, and unaccountably nervous. Rosalie had already called out to the girls as she reached the door, otherwise Joey would have been tempted to suggest they wait a moment, perhaps talk together first. 

She almost held her breath as she peered around Rosalie; Looking back at them were three young girls, kneeling by a doll's house and clearly surprised to see a visitor. She was shocked, despite herself, and realised that despite regular pictures of the girls being sent out, some small part of her had expected babies or toddlers. The latest picture to reach her had been when they were just turned 5, and still quite chubby faced and baby like, but now they were most certainly little people in their own right. She was washed away in a sense of how fast time passed, and realised again just how long it had been since she left the UK and those she considered her family.

The girls looked at her then towards their mother, getting up and standing quietly ready to be introduced. Rosalie was unusually flustered for her, and they seemed to sense this, drawing together and moving close to their mother's skirts in a way they hadn't done for a long time. Joey was struck with their calmness, a quietness that differed so greatly from the children she had seen recently. She was sure that Americans in general paid no less attention to behaviour than the British. In fact she knew that to be the case, for the majority of children that she'd known in New York would have done just the same thing. However the isolated and rich Hollywood society set seemed to have spawned an unusual amount of loud and extroverted offspring in recent years. It was far more common to be launched upon for play or attention, or ignored as not worthy of notice.

Joey realised that she was staring, and hadn't greeted the little girls. She knelt down and looked at the three of them, told them her name, and wondered aloud whether she could guess theirs. Con was easy, for her dark eyes and colouring made her distinctly different from the other two; aside from which she was a head smaller than her sisters, and much less robust looking. She smiled to be mentioned first, and confirmed, though unable to stop a slight cough as she did so. Joey frowned for a moment, then realised the girls were waiting. She put aside her worries about Con's health and concentrated on the other two.

Len had eyes of violet and a determined set to her chin. She had expressions and a way of standing that Jo recognised coming from Jack, but there the resemblance ended. It was clear already that she would be the spitting image of Rosalie when older. Margot was similar enough to Len to make the decision a hard one; However her eyes were a bright blue, and that was enough to remind Joey of a tiny baby grabbing her finger and refusing to let go. The girls were obviously used to people mixing them up, for they grinned and nodded when she got them the right way around.

They started to warm to her gradually and ask her questions, although it was clear that they only had a very vague idea about America, and seemed to have mixed it up with a place they called 'Ostreeya' which confused Jo initially. She guessed where they meant only when Len pointed to a picture of the Tiernsee and asked if it still looked like that, and asked if any 'Nasties' were still there. Joey lit up initially as she noticed the little picture, but then felt sad as she realised that these little ones might never know the place she still felt was home. It seemed unlikely that she herself would be able to return there herself anytime soon.

She couldn't help but return her attention to Con, frowning as she listened to the girl's breathing. Joey had spent too many years of her life having to pay attention to signs like that, first with herself and then the Robin, and she knew the difference between the sound of other two chattering freely and Con's slight wheeze and occasional coughing fit as she tried to join in. Jo automatically wanted to investigate, or cuddle the girl close, although Con would have been very surprised if she had. Instead she listened all the more carefully when Con tried to tell her something, knowing the extra effort that talking could be when the edge of a cough was always there.

Margot was an observant little soul, and had an unfortunate streak of selfishness and temper. She loved her sister, but did get fed up with all of the aunts and uncles looking concerned when Con coughed and talking about Con's health. The little monkey had tried some coughing herself to see whether it worked, but the family was so familiar with TB and similar diseases that they easily could tell the difference between real causes for concern and mild breathlessness or coughing. After her father had suggested some rather nasty cough medicine for her a few times, Margot gave up that plan. It still annoyed her that Con should get so much fuss, for Margot was too young to realise the difficulties her sister had to deal with every day. 

Con managed quite well most of the time, but once she was in a stage of having breathing issues it was hard for her to control the little coughs that adults seemed so worried about. Even kind Len would get impatient when Con couldn't quite get her words out, for she managed well enough between the three of them. Neither sister could understand the difference that nerves made to an already disturbed chest, and Con had begun try to avoid talking when adults were around, sensing that it upset her sisters. Rosalie had noticed the problem and warned the others, so nowadays none of them showed their concern for Con outwardly, and the issue had faded away. Now however, this stranger was paying Con a lot of attention and Margot didn't like it.

Seeing this, Rosalie mentally shook herself out of the confusion of Joey's arrival, searching her mind for ways to keep everyone distracted while Jack searched for Phil. She caught sight of the low bookcase in the corner, and asked the girls to show Jo their favourite books, a question that normally always resulted in at least one of Jo's stories, colourfully illustrated by Polly. In that way that children seem to manage to sense a chance to embarrass and always then do the unexpected, the triplets for the first time in years didn't pick the well worn favourites, the stories Jo had created in part for them. Con was as expected, and chose AA Milne's 'Now we are Six', Margot chose a colouring book and Len announced for the first time ever that she didn't like reading. Poor Rosalie then had even more awkwardness, for her gentle prods towards their normal favourites seemed forced. Len infuriatingly then decided that she would chose Winnie the Pooh, a book that she hadn't been at all interested in prior to that day, despite Con loving it almost as much as Now we are Six.

Rosalie was sure that it seemed as though she was pretending the children liked the books, which was all the more frustrating since only the previous day she and Jack joking about being impossible to go anywhere without at least one of the "Pollyjo" coming along. Rosalie gave up and tried another tack, only to have her reminder that the books were written by Aunty Jo led to a near stand off where Len and Con stubbornly insisted that "Our Aunt Polly" made the books. Margot would have probably been just as stubborn about it, but was too busy ignoring Joey and pretending to be absorbed in colouring in a picture.

Joey smiled at Rosalie's despair and changed the subject, asking the girls what they had been doing with the dolls house. Margot stopped colouring and rushed over to the house to show her, followed quickly by her sisters, and a complicated explanation ensued. Joey listened carefully, taking the whole matter very seriously, and was glad to see that gradually the 'being good for a visitor' stance relaxed, and the girls squabbled amicably over which furniture belonged in each room. She couldn't help but be a little disappointed that her efforts with the books hadn't really worked to keep her a real person in their minds, but she understood. They hadn't really been aware of other people properly when she left, and however much she loved and remembered them, she was a photograph or name, no more.

Rosalie relaxed a little, seeing that the four of them were well occupied and distracting themselves. She wondered briefly whether to sneak away and try to talk to Jack, but she was sure that they would notice and follow, which wouldn't help if Phil arrived back before Jack could speak to him. She wondered whether to tell Jo herself, but with three little sets of ears and eyes to consider, she didn't think it was worth the risk. Jo might well take it in her stride, but it was a complicated situation, and the last thing Rosalie needed was to have things said in front of the girls that they might misunderstand or repeat. She contented herself with listening hard for any sign of Jack's approach, and suggesting new games every now and again. The time seemed to be dragging past, and still no sign of Jack or Phil returning. Where on earth were they?

\---

Phil finally slowed his blind rush through the trees and started to mentally surface, come to his senses. He still felt the need to move, just walk blindly, walk anywhere, walk until his panic subsided, but he began to at least pay some attention to his surroundings. He noticed that he'd somehow found a path and ended up following it, although he had made no conscious decision to do so. He looked up at the sky when a gap in the trees came up, and decided that he must have passed the house. He wasn't sure, but his instinct was that he was now heading away from Jack and Rosalie, so he changed direction. He hoped that he'd remembered things correctly, as he was starting to get hungry again. A good thing, in terms of feeling able to feel something other than panic, but unhelpful when trying to concentrate. He regretted his small breakfast now, as his jumbled mind was never helped by his blood sugar being irregular. At least it was still early in the day, and he knew that he ought to find a road or house somewhere if he just kept walking.

Jack had gone a short distance in several directions to see if he could see Phil, with no luck, and was now at a loss as to how to find him. Afraid that his friend might return while he was out, he decided in the end to stay near the house, all the while trying to work out how on earth to tell Phil, to explain Joey's appearance. He didn't want Phil to run away, he sensed that this visit was important in his friend's recovery.

But what to tell Joey ? What would Phil want to do? How would Joey react, suddenly finding out that Phil was alive? Jack could feel a headache coming on, and tried to flex his shoulders, relax. He knew that he had to plan what to say, but his brain seemed to be stuck on a loop. The best he could come up with was "Find Phil, hide him from Joey, tell him when she's gone."

But to do that, he needed to find Phil before he saw Joey, or vice versa. Which would be a lot easier if he could just ... find ... Phil...

\---

Madge and Jem had returned to a wildly excited Sybil and Primula. The young pair had had time to realise what a surprise Joey's return would be to the adults. However much they were bubbling with the news they couldn't break their word and tell anyone, but kept leaping up at every sound outside and rushing to the windows, until Madge was ready to shake the pair of them. Sybil could be a fidget on occasion, but Primula was usually quite calm, so to have both of them like jumping beans was extremely bewildering.

On one of her skips over to the window, Sybil initially jumped and grinned, then frowned and squinted out to the garden.

"There's a man outside, I thought it was ... Um... Er...there's a man outside" she gabbled, and Jem went to the window to see what she was talking about.

"Looks like a lost walker." Jem said, and went out to see what the visitor wanted.

Phil was glad to see the house, and was just looking around the curved walls to find the front door when a serious looking man stepped out of a side door. As he strode towards him Phil frowned, for he had a vaguely familiar appearance. He steeled himself and started towards the man, hoping against hope that he wouldn't stutter or make too much of a fool of himself. He would have much preferred to keep himself to himself when in this sort of state, but he had to find out how to get back to Jack and Rosalie.

"Can I help?" Jem asked, wondering why the young man seemed to be staring at him in recognition when he was fairly sure they'd never met.

"Mm.. my aa.. a . apologies" Phil stammered, frustrated with his voice for showing his mental tiredness. "I'm sorry to bother you. I'm staying nearby, and seem to have lost my way. Could I ask the way back to Dr Maynard's house?"

Jem was startled to hear the familiar name, and looked all the more closely at the stranger. He vaguely remembered a friend who had been a POW, and Jack mentioning a possible visit, perhaps this explained the somewhat defocused state of this young man.

"Of course, I know Jack well. You really have wandered quite a way! Come in, sit down, then we can telephone Maynard, and you can take a break before heading back"

Jem suited his actions to his words, herding the young man into the house and steering him to an armchair. He didn't know what it was, but he could see that the man wasn't well, was under strain. He was sweating slightly, and paler than he ought to be, seemed to be almost shaking. Jem's trained eye picked out the signs of overstress, and wasn't about to let this boy head off into the woods again. He must have wandered several miles to have ended up at the Round House, and it wasn't like Jack or Rosalie to leave a guest alone long enough to get lost, so there must be more to this story.

He left Madge looking after Phil, and went off to his office to telephone. He let the phone ring a few times, then put the handset down, frowning at it. It wasn't like Jack or Rosalie to ever ignore a phone, doctors were too often needed at a moments notice. Jem was in two minds whether to just drive the young man back himself, if he couldn't get an answer. He decided to wait a few more minutes, then try one more time.

\---

Rosalie could hear the phone, and was torn, not wanting to leave Jo in case she came out and saw Phil. Hopefully Jack would get it, or whoever it was would try again later. The bell continued to ring however, and she began to worry in case it was anything vital. Should she answer or not? She decided finally to risk a trip out onto the landing to see whether Jack was nearby, but there was no sign of him. Finally as yet another chorus of 'RING!! RING!! RING RIIIIING!!' filled the hallway she couldn't help herself. As a doctor's wife she knew how important it was to be available, and she couldn't just leave it. With a glance thrown over her shoulder to make sure Jo was occupied, she ran down the stairs and grabbed the phone just as Jem was about to give up.

"Maynard doctor house!" She gabbled, then took a breath. "Dr Maynard's house I mean."

"Hello Rosalie, Jem here." came the familiar tones, and Rosalie automatically began to get ready to look for Jack, making agreeing noises as Jem started to explain, but not really listening. Suddenly she registered the words "Lost ... young man... Graves..." and gripped the handset.

"You have him there?" She almost squeaked the words in relief, and had to pull herself together. She didn't know whether Jem was aware of Joey's return, or the young pair's history together, but at least she knew where Phil was finally.

But what to do with him?

She tuned back into Jem asking her if they wanted him to drive Phil over, as their guest didn't seem in a state to walk back. She started to say yes, then had visions of Jem seeing Joey when he shouldn't, or Phil seeing Joey, Joey seeing Phil or Jem and Madge seeing Joey seeing Phil ...

"Er... Well, um, um yes, um." She spun around as she talked, trying to find Jack. "you could...no we'll get him... Um ... It could be... Um well it's ... not simple.., but ... yes, can you keep him there a moment, I'll get Jack to come and get him, yes that will work, um...yes"

Jem put the phone down and looked at it in bemusement. Of all the people that he would have said were unflappable, Rosalie would be top of the list. It wasn't that complicated a question, was it? He shook his head, and went off to keep the surprise guest entertained until his friend turned up.

Meanwhile Rosalie was frantically trying to work out how to find Jack, tell him without Joey hearing, and swop the two people over without anyone seeing anybody they shouldn't, or confusing Madge and Jem too much. She nearly wept with relief when she saw Jack's head pass one of the windows on one of his sweeps around the garden. He was getting more and more frustrated with looking into the woods for Phil. She gave an agonised look up the stairs and had to hope Joey wouldn't come to look for her as she ran out after her husband.

"Jack ! He's at Jam and Medge's!" She said, rather incoherently. "Jem and Madge's I mean. He's there and she's here and we need to swop and, oh help I think she's coming down the stairs..."

Jack had picked up enough however, and raced for the car, hoping that Rosalie would think of a good enough explanation for him disappearing if Joey noticed. He ground the gears, wincing at the sound but getting finally to head off down the drive.

\---

Joey wasn't sure how much the triplets could be trusted alone, so had thankfully only got to the head of the stairs by the time Rosalie flung herself back into the hall. Hoping that the story wouldn't be put to the test, Rosalie gabbled something about Jack being called away to a patient, and suggested some food. Joey however was sure that Madge must be back by now, and could not be swayed from taking her leave and returning to the Round House. All Rosalie could do was try to delay her all she could, then hope that Jack and Phil had left before Joey arrived there, or at very least Jack had managed to talk to Phil.

Jack however was only thinking about keeping Phil away from their house, so had been persuaded to have a cup of tea and take the time to introduce his friends properly. Phil was looking far less pale than when he had arrived, and was happy to chat. He had realised now that this was Joey's sister and brother in law, which is why Jem had seemed familiar. Joey had had photos of her family all around her room, and been only too keen to tell him about them all when they had been together. He was pleased to have encountered a valid memory from before the war, and was enjoying the meeting. The only thing was that wasn't sure whether Joey had ever told her family about him, so was having to be careful what he said.

It wasn't until Sybil and Primula began their trips to look out of the window again, and Madge expressed her confusion as to who they were looking out for, that Jack came to his senses and realised the flaw in his plan, namely that Joey would be on her way back any minute.

He gulped his tea down, made their excuses and bundled Phil into the car, shooting off in a way that made Jem exclaim at such careless driving. Sure enough, as they set off along the road from the Round House, he noticed Joey heading towards them. Everything seemed to be about to unravel around him, when he noticed a small track off to one side, swung the wheel to the right and powered the car off into a field. Phil swore and held onto the door, wondering quite what was going on. Jack simply spun round in his seat, and breathed a sigh of relief as Joey passed by, oblivious.

Unfortunately his little car wasn't up to such antics, and now had decided that it was quite happy to stay in it's muddy ruts, thank you very much. Adding some choice epithets to Phil's, Jack got out and started trying to push the car back. Phil looked at him for a moment, then joined in. Finally they were out on the road again, and about to set off, when Phil put his hand on the wheel, stopping Jack from moving it.

"WHAT was that about?" Phil asked, looking at his friend and clearly not to be put off getting some answers.

Jack realised he had only avoided the problem not solved it. He took a deep breath and told Phil about Joey's return, eyes constantly checking the weather of his friend's face as he spoke.

\---

Joey had been surprised by the sudden swerve of the other car off the road but merely assumed that it was going into a small driveway rather than a field, and continued happily on her way. She was nearly at the Round House, and was hoping that by now Jem and Madge would be back. Her eyes lit up at the sight of the car on the driveway. She couldn't resist hitting the horn a few times as she slid to a halt and leapt out of the car. Sybil and Primula gave a couple of gurgling squawks and looked at each other, sure that this time it surely must be Joey. Madge looked up, startled, and Jem frowned as he got up from his chair to look out of the window. He stifled an exclamation then grinned as he turned to Madge.

"Someone for you, dear" was all he said, and sat back down, with a smile creeping across his face. By this time Joey had reached the front door and couldn't be seen from the window, so Madge couldn't see for herself who it was, and had no idea whether she needed to be Mrs Russell, Chalet School owner, Helpful neighbour Lady Russell, or Aunt, Friend and surrogate mother 'Aunty Madge'. Jem had settled back down in his chair, smirking slightly behind his paper and clearly not going to explain any further, so Madge was left with no choice but to go and investigate herself. 

She tidied herself in the hallway mirror, just in case, but from how infuriating Jem was being, she guessed that it was one of the extended family, perhaps even Dick and Mollie. Many other possibilities passed through her mind as she opened the door with a smile, quickly changing to a stunned stare. The last person she had expected to see as her younger sister, assuming her far away in America.

It was barely a minute before she had pulled Joey into a fierce hug, before pushing her away and searching her face. The young woman before her was neat, well put together, but clearly still natural and fresh. Madge hadn't realised until then just how much she had feared that Hollywood would have changed her sister, made her a doll, some painted parody of the girl she knew. The mobile face that looked back at her with shining eyes was sensibly made up, but as alive and human, and... And as much JOEY as ever. 

She couldn't help herself, and threw her arms around her sister again, pulling her tight in for another hug. The years made no difference, she was still her precious girl, much as she really was a woman now. In the way that children have of never growing up fully in a parent's eyes, all Madge could see was the mobile face of her little sister, much more like her daughter than sibling, even now.

Joey was struggling not to give way to tears, for she had missed Madge more than she could say, letters and occasional phone calls just weren't the same in any way. She had had time and developed the maturity to appreciate just how much she owed to Madge. She had seen many motherless girls now in show business, and those with mothers so lax and selfish they hardly counted as such. These girls had nothing to fall back on when things didn't go their way, and time and time again Joey had become a mother figure to others, having learnt how from her sister's example. 

"Anyone else invited to this reunion?" came an amused voice from the hallway, and the sisters came to their senses enough to release each other and turn towards the house. Jem stood there, hands in pockets, and, as Madge told him later, grinning from ear to ear. Behind him, peering out of the drawing room doorway, were all of the children, most looking all eyes, and clearly unsure whether they could come out of the room or not. Joey couldn't believe how they had all grown, and the next few hours were full of the "Where did the time go?" type of exclamations.

Joey was soon caught up on the school news, for everyone had written as often as they could, so she didn't have too many surprises. The fact of the school's imminent removal hadn't properly reached her, and she was surprised to feel a little sad. She had already felt this calm and wooded area to be a possible home, for however short a time, and the idea of a rocky coastal island didn't appeal. It wasn't until quite a few crossed comments that Madge realised what she was thinking, and hastened to reassure her.

"Oh we aren't moving !" she said with a laugh. "Jem is needed here at the San, as is Jack. I really do leave most of the day to day issues to Hilda and Nell now, we decided a joint headship made sense, now that I am going to be... Well, busy..."

Joey was on this comment in a flash. "Madge ! You don't mean? You do! When?"

Madge remembered too late that this news hadn't been shared with her daughters yet, but after all they would have to know at some point. Sybil was all eyes, and Josette was quick enough to tell from this that something involving them was going on. Ailie was too young to really understand, but just in case, she phrased things carefully.

"Well I suppose now is as good a time as any, girls." She said, drawing her daughters close. David was away, and would, she was sure, take the news in his stride. "You are going to have a little brother or sister by the end of the year, if all goes well."

The excitement following this was nearly as much as generated by Joey's arrival. Ailee was already nearly 4, and Madge herself had thought their little family complete. Joey was thrilled to be an aunt again, and in that moment the seeds of her plan to stay in Britain for a while were firmly sown. Seeing Sybil, Josette and Ailie, who in her mind were still babies, or very young children, she was determined not to miss being an aunt to this little one right from the start.

Madge was thrilled to hear of Joey's possible English film roles, and the vague suggestions of her sister staying with them until things were settled were received with an almost schoolgirl like enthusiasm. Sybil and Josette giggled to see their normally unflappable mother mixing up her words and rushing about like a mad thing. Finally, since they looked highly unlikely to finish their weekend prep anyway, Sybil and Primula took charge, and shooed Madge away back to Joey, then on to the school, where those who knew Joey were amazed to see her, and the girls placed into complete ferment by the arrival of this Hollywood film star in their midst. Especially when Miss Burn was to be seen whooping and charging across the grounds towards the car and her friend, followed shortly by most of the other staff, although most managed to remember their dignity a little better than the ecstatic Hilary.

\---

In all of this excitement, the young man who had appeared at the Round House was forgotten, and although she knew Phil was in the area, Hilary didn't think about him until that evening, when telling Nancy about the returned Joey, and her partner reminded her of the connection. They knew the romance had been over before Phil left, and that Phil had been thought dead and gone during much of the war, but no more. Nancy now worked with many returned soldiers, so had some idea of how difficult these situations could be, and they decided to leave any discussions to Jack or Phil themselves. 

Conversation passed quite quickly onto news Joey had brought of friends living overseas, and the pair forgot all about Phil until some time later.

Jack, however knew nothing of this, and had to assume that Joey would soon discover who their houseguest was. He was grateful that he had at least managed to tell Phil about Joey before he saw her, but was very worried by the result. Phil had been silent for some time, then politely but firmly insisted on going home immediately. Jack had managed to get his friend to agree to wait until the next day, for he was clearly exhausted after the morning's scramble through the woods. He had accepted a meal from Rosalie, and then retired to his room, they hoped to sleep, but in fact to stare at the ceiling, totally unsure what would be best to do.

Joey had become his guardian angel, this image of a woman he had believed for so long to be no connection to him. He knew now that they had parted company some time before he left, and so it wasn't as if he owed her any explanations. It ought to be simple, but he still felt confused, and unsure whether he could really cope with ever meeting Joey in person. If she turned out to be, as she surely must be, only human, and nothing like his dream of her, then a big part of his mental support system would be gone. He just couldn't face that yet, much as he felt that he ought to take this opportunity, go for the tiniest possibility that she did care for him, at least as a friend.

The next day, he woke, still obsessed about going home, but since he had been due to leave that afternoon anyway, he made a great effort and stayed until the original time. He was constantly on guard however, sure that Joey might appear, and it was a relief to both him and to Jack when he was safely delivered onto the train home. He rested back against the rough material of the train seat, and closed his eyes. He was glad that he had made the trip, even with the less than ideal day before. There was something helpful in the fact that he had broken down slightly, but dealt with it, had managed to keep his composure. This morning he had even managed to play a little more with the children, and he was grateful to his friends for the chance for this little holiday. It had shown him how fragile he still was, but also how far he had come, and gave him hope for the future.

His thoughts wandered back to Joey, as they tended to in times of stress. Only now, there was an interruption in his mental image, a chink of reality showing through. He had come very close to seeing her, and now that she was in the country, it might be possible that someday they would properly meet again. The thought both petrified him and enthralled him. He knew one thing, that he didn't want her to see him like this, and he was now even more determined than ever to return to himself as much as he could before that meeting, if it ever occurred. This near miss had become a spur to him, a reason to keep going, beat the panic, and aim for as normal a life as he could manage.

Jack walked slowly back to the car. Phil Graves was such a silent fellow now, it was hard to know whether he had benefitted from the trip or not, much as he politely said that he had enjoyed himself. At least there was one benefit of Joey returning so suddenly, he had managed to get agreement from Phil that she had to be told immediately about his return, not wait for a letter. The situation had worried the naturally truthful Jack, for he wouldn't want to hurt either of his friends, and in his experience secrets had a way of getting out. He had spoked to Rosalie at length the night before, and she had been just as conflicted, but ultimately in agreement. Joey had to know, it was too much like a 'Penny dreadful' magazine story to leave it and risk her finding out through hearsay.

It ought to be one of them telling the story, and Jack had volunteered to do it on his way back from the station. He didn't know how long Joey was staying for, and he wanted to get it over with as soon as possible. Apart from the awkwardness of lying to her, or her finding out from others, he couldn't risk Phil getting home and then contacting him with a changed mind. No, it had to be done, and done now. Jack sent up a quick prayer for the right words, and turned the car towards The Round House.

Madge answered the door, welcomed him in, before calling Joey down and leaving the pair together. She knew they hadn't had much of a chance to catch up, and sensed that Jack wanted to talk to Joey privately. The girls were back at school now, and the house was quiet, but Jack struggled to find the words to start his conversation, ending up drifting around in circles with general gossip. 

Joey was too glad to see him to notice initially, but soon realised that something was worrying him. Immediately she assumed that it was a problem with one of the girls; Con's breathing issues had worried her the day before, and she had intended on gradually finding out if there was anything she could do to help. So her first thoughts were that something serious was wrong, and badly so. Despite her instinct to rush straight in, she knew that wouldn't help. So she suggested a walk, hoping that Jack would perhaps relax enough to get his worries off his chest.

As they wandered in the trees, her plan worked. Being completely alone made conversation much easier, as did the walking itself. Jack smiled to himself, remembering that in their early days of nearly courting, they had gone on many walks all around the Sonalpe and down by the school. Even more helpfully, as they walked along he remembered Phil's rush through the woods to the Round House, and realised that he could use that as a starting point.

"Joey, did Jem or Madge say anything to you about a ... visitor we had over the weekend? He became lost and ended up here? Did they... Did anyone tell you who he was?"

Joey looked at him, confusion on her face. This didn't have anything to do with the triplets, as far as she could tell. Her sister had mentioned a friend of Jack's getting lost, but in the excitement of their own reunion no name had been mentioned.

"No? I don't remember his name, although I think something was mentioned in passing." she replied, frowning as she tried to remember, and also work out how this conversation bore any relation to her; She didn't really know any of Jack's friends, they hadn't been together long enough really to know those sorts of details.

Jack cast around for the best way to continue.

"Well he, he was a prisoner of war, you see, this friend..."

He tapered off, still searching for the words. A small part of him had hoped that the name had already been mentioned, so that this news wasn't quite such a shock.

"He - the friend - he... well, he was thought to be dead, he... Oh dammit Jo, I can't find a good way to say this - it was... IS... Jo, it's Phil Graves..."

Joey had learnt to keep her thoughts away from her face, so her worry about what this news could be hadn't been obvious but at this she couldn't help but show her shock. He looked at her in concern, as she paled and staggered slightly, looking quite light headed. He steered her to a fallen tree and insisted she sit, and she didn't argue. They sat in silence while she gradually regained her balance and colour. Those minutes of quiet gave her a chance to really process what he'd said, and she was soon composed enough to ask him more.

"How? They told me ... told us ... they said someone saw him die? The war has been over for ages, how can he only just be back?"

Jack had known that this question would come, and he wished again that he had pressed Phil sooner to let Joey know before now.

"No, he...he's been back a few years..." he began, then stuttered to a stop as she jumped to her feet and a furious face was turned to him.

"Years? Years? How, why, what on earth was he, were YOU thinking, not to tell me?" she stormed, unable to believe what she was hearing.

Jack, of all people, knew how hard Phil's death had been for her; She couldn't see any reason for this deception, and waited while she told him what she thought about him keeping this from her in no uncertain terms.

"He wouldn't let me tell you, Joey." Jack said when he finally managed to get a word in. "He... He's not the same man..."

"What do you mean?" Joey was still angry, but she could tell from Jack's expression that he really had wanted to tell her, so there must be a good reason behind it all. Jack and Rosalie knew her better than almost anybody and as she became more rational she knew they wouldn't have left her believing Phil dead without good reason.

"For a long time, no one knew" Jack explained, walking beside her as they continued, feet naturally finding a clear path, although neither of them could have retraced the route later. "His sister wasn't sure - she thought it might be another man using Phil's name, and didn't want to get her hopes up or to risk him being punished for pretending to be Phil. 

Then, when she realised that it really was him, the situation required secrecy. He... He was damaged, Jo - mentally. I don't know all of the details, but apparently he was quite bad. Very poor memory, couldn't tell dreams from reality. She didn't know whether he would survive the war in the camp, and then when he did return home, he was immensely fragile. That was when I first met him again. I wanted to tell you immediately, but he wasn't ready, I couldn't rush him Jo. You would have to have been there to understand, but it's been a very slow process."

She was silent for a moment. Phil. Alive. Damaged, maybe, but alive. She was too shocked to feel happy yet, although that did come later. At the moment she was just trying to take it all in. She vaguely heard Jack explaining the situation, and that this was Phil's first visit to Jack and Rosalie's house. At this, she made the connection with the 'lost walker' and registered that Phil had been there, at the Round House. Might even now be at Jack and Rosalie's house, waiting to see her.

Did she want to see him? For many years she would have thought the answer would instantly be 'Yes'. But a damaged Phil, a man who maybe didn't even recognise her, didn't remember her? She had struggled for a long time to deal with her grief for him, this could be like returning to that grief. Could she cope with that? In this instant moment of shock, she really didn't know. Jack stayed quiet for a moment, realising that she needed some time to take it all in.

He hadn't realised she still thought Phil was at his house, so was bemused by a question about whether Rosalie was looking after him.

"No, he lives with his sister... Ah No, I see what you mean - he left this morning Jo, we wanted him to see you, but... he wouldn't stay any longer..."

This fact stunned Jo, and she chewed it over for a moment or two. He wouldn't stay. He didn't want to see her. Here she was wondering about her own feelings, and it didn't matter anyway. He didn't want to see her.

\---

Jack wasn't sure what else he could say, so started directing their wander back to the house. He really ought to be at the San at this time of day anyway, although he knew that he wouldn't be missed just yet. He was worried about the silence now coming from Joey, and felt dimly that he needed to explain better.

"You see Joey, he remembered you, but not that it was you... He had a dream, and a picture, and ... Oh I don't quite know how to explain ... He's a good man, Joey, honestly. He's just been through a lot, Joey, and he's... He's just not ready yet to see you. He had agreed, you know, to telling you, sending a letter, but you surprised us all, you see..."

She nodded, not sure she could trust herself to reply. She had gone through so much in grieving for Phil, for what might have been. She knew logically that her reply to his proposal would have made no difference to his going to war. But a tiny secret part of her had carried a bit of guilt, of fear that she had made the wrong decision. No one since Phil had sparked that excitement in her, had felt so close, but did that mean anything? Was the - Joey hated herself for what she felt to be selfishness - but was the Phil she knew even there anymore? She had met American servicemen with Shell Shock, or whatever it was they called it nowadays. 

There were stories about gentle men who had returned violent, or lost their wits, become shells of the people they had been before. Jack said Phil's memory had been damaged. Would he even remember their time together? He had escaped a meeting, and she understood why, it must have been a shock. But would he ever want to be in contact? There was so much to tell him, but she didn't even know whether he wanted to hear it all, or could deal with it, with the emotions that seeing each other would bring up. To add to the confusion, it sounded as though he perhaps didn't want to see her anyway. Should she argue against that, or respect it?

Back at the Round House, she was quiet and pensive, still dealing with this unexpected news. Jack knew he ought to go, but didn't like to leave Joey in this state. He encouraged her to sit down, and fetched her a drink of water, stayed as long as he could, but now he really did need to get to work. Joey went to freshen up after the walk, and he hovered anxiously in the entrance hall, wondering what was best to do.

"You look worried, Jack, can I help?"

Madge's voice filtered through to him, and he turned to see her looking at him quizzically. He was a little stuck, for he didn't know how much Madge and Jem had known about Phil and Joey's relationship. He decided in the end to give her the simplest of details, merely that Joey had known his friend Graves, and it had been a shock to realise that he was still alive. Madge was no fool, and he could tell she guessed this had been more than a simple friendship. She was intrigued, for Joey had shown very little inclination towards romance. A thousand questions occurred about why Jack was being so secretive, and she wanted to ask for more details. However, seeing that Madge was there, he gratefully took his leave and rushed off. She decided that she needed to wait until Joey was ready, so didn't press her for details, merely offering support and a space to talk if her sister wanted to do so.

Joey herself wasn't quite sure how much she wanted to tell anyone, at least until she knew more about Phil's illness. She decided to write and let him know that she was there when he was ready, and leave it up to him. There was no way that she could force him to see her, after all. So she kept it simple, but made it clear how happy she was to know he was safe and that she was back in the UK, and would be for at least the next year. She posted it, and waited, but as the weeks, then months passed, she heard nothing.

Thankfully she was kept busy seeing old friends and making new ones, even helping at the school on occasion, teaching classes in elocution and drama. Soon after that she received the offer to join the film studio, and a new chapter in her career began. She still checked the post, hoping to see his familiar hand, but there was nothing. As the months passed she managed to distract herself with her work, and put Phil Graves to the back of her mind. 

Jack told her that he kept Phil up to date with things, and periodically suggested a meeting, but he could do no more. After a few times, he stopped telling her this, although he still tried to get Phil to "see sense", but with no results.

Phil had been thrilled by Joey's letter, but the excitement and fear of a meeting had put him back some way, and to his frustration he began stuttering again, and being knocked back by headaches. There is just no rushing the brain, he knew well enough by now. He kept telling himself that he would reply soon, then as the time passed a new problem arose. How could he contact her now, when he had left it this long? 

Also it was all that he could do to keep himself going, keep his mind able to work. How could he risk a meeting, when only the possibility of seeing her had set him so far back? He couldn't make that first step, couldn't work out how to explain his lack of contact. So he let things slide, and the further they slid, the harder writing the letter became, until he eventually began to avoid contact even with Jack, as it was just too strong a reminder of his failure to reply.

-


	17. Chapter 17

Meanwhile, the school, and Hilary Burns along with it, had removed to St Brevails, an Island just off the coast near Carnbach. Nancy and she still did their best to spend time together, but it was becoming harder and harder to do so, as the school was now a good day's journey from London each way. They had to be much more discrete as well, since they didn't have the convenience of Howells where Nancy could stay at the Maynard house. 

Rosalie Maynard had reluctantly had to give up her position as secretary until the school returned to Howells, since she didn't want the girls to be so far away from Jack. As she said to Hilary on the weekend before the move, the girls were young enough that only seeing him every few weeks was far too long a gap, and she wasn't going to drag them along with her, however much she enjoyed her role at the school.

Madge had been presented with a similar dilemma, for she wasn't keen on Josette and Ailee being so far away at their ages. As she said when discussing it with Joey, it had been different when she had been a part of the school itself, or nearby. Then she could keep an eye on Peggy, Bride and her own girls, but allow them to get most of the benefit of being part of the school. Her nieces and Sybil were now old enough to be happy boarding, even excited about the new school on the Island. 

However she agreed that it would be a long term for children the age of the Triplets and her younger daughters. She knew that the parents of some other girls were unhappy about the move. It really was a difficult decision, for she didn't really want to take on a house in Carnbach when so many parts of her life were established in Armishire. Also she knew that there was a lower chance of her sister getting enough time off to visit her in Carnbach compared to Howells.

Madge had dealt with Joey being away for so many years, and had been so busy that she had barely had time to notice the time passing. However she knew that Joey would have to go wherever was best for her career, and that was likely to mean America again. Madge knew that this time together was limited, so while her sister was in the country, and relatively near, Madge meant to make the most of every minute. From Howells she could go for a day visit to Joey or they could meet half way, but the extra time to Carnbach would make it far less possible. So it was that while the main school happily prepared for the move, Madge and Rosalie were torn between wanting to support the move; and for their children to continue in the same lines as their school but not be boarders just yet. Surprisingly a solution to the problem came from Joey herself.

Madge had met her sister at the studios; a necessity now as Joey was working so many hours that she wouldn't be able to visit for some time. Even on this visit, Joey was only able to take a relatively small amount of time off, so had suggested meeting in the studio cafeteria. Joey had been amused to see her normally dignified elder sister almost talking gibberish when introduced to her co stars. It was still a small studio, and no one was as well known as Joey herself, so many of the actors were very pleased with her sister's reaction. In the fast moving film world, they were no longer considered famous, but many of them had been well known in the 1930s. As Madge said, that was the last time she had been to the cinema or theatre, other than loyally going to any show with Joey in it, so she was thoroughly star struck.

Madge had been discussing the problem of the youngsters while trying hard not to be distracted by people in various costumes eating all around them. There was something very surreal about a man dressed as a fly eating a cheese and pickle sandwich, or a very realistic Queen Elizabeth rehearsing lines with Sir Francis Drake over a cup of coffee and a bacon bap.

Joey was far more used to this sort of environment, so was able to give her full attention to the problem.

"It's simple enough, Madge. You should do it!"

"Mmmhff?" was her sister's initial reply, before catching herself and bring her attention back to the conversation. "Sorry Joey, what was that? What should I do ?"

Joey grinned, and spelt it out more clearly.

"You should run a kindergarten, - or Junior school, really - while the main Chalet School is away. You wouldn't need many staff to help you, and after all, it wouldn't be the first time you started a school my dear! You're worried about the girls not feeling part of the school when it returns, well make a little bit of the school stay behind with them!"

"Joey! Do talk sense. How could I do that? I may be able to take a few of the subjects, but what if one of my girls fell ill, or needed me? I wouldn't be able to teach and look after them, and the same for any others that join us. I can hardly ask Matey to stay behind!"

Joey laughed at the idea, but wasn't to be deterred from her plan. Madge was in danger of becoming 'That sweet Lady Russell', and Joey was determined that it wouldn't happen. She cast her mind over the problem and soon had an idea.

"What about Doris Trewlawny? You said that she wasn't keen on Mary Lou going so far away just after the news of her father, and if she wants to keep Mary Lou nearby she will certainly keep that tiny creature who stirred poor Plato up so... Verity Anne, that's the one! Doris could well decide to keep the girls with her, given the choice. 

Well what about asking her to join in, be a type of assistant? She wouldn't have the authority for it in a real school, but she could well enough deal with a small group of juniors. It would be just the thing for her, distraction from her loss as well. You already have Rosalie at a loose end and worried about the Triplets' schooling, so she would help too, I'm sure. And ... and Verity Anne's father is a cartographer isn't he? I know he's meant to be convalescing, but surely he could help out with geography and that sort of thing?"

Madge was silent. It would resolve an awful lot of problems, and after all, it would only be for a term or so while the drains were dealt with. She knew of about 10 or 15 under 11s that would be potentially lost to the school otherwise, and she did really want to keep her own girls with her for a little while longer. 

Mathematics would be the only problem, for it wasn't really her subject, but the sort of work done by that age would be within her and Mr Carey's abilities to deal with, she was sure. She knew it wouldn't be as simple as Joey was saying. After all, it had been a different time and country when she had set up the Chalet School. There were far more regulations now, and people expected more from girl's schools, from schools in general if it came to that. 

However, as a temporary stop gap, it wouldn't be too impossible, and really would solve a problem. She felt a sense of excitement that she hadn't had for years, and her brain was buzzing with possibilities. Joey had some wild ideas sometimes, but this... This might actually work...

And to cut a long story short - it did! 

While the plans for removing the main school continued, Madge made some quiet inquiries, and discovered several of the parents with Day or Weekly boarders had been considering removing their younger children. That made the decision for her, and the Chalet School Prep branch was born. There had already been a plan for Ivy Norman to rejoin the school, and it didn't make much difference to her to start the time in Howells, rather than on the Island. Even the maths issue resolved itself, for Miss Edwards jumped at the chance of staying nearby. Since many of the juniors and kindergarten were now staying at the Prep, she would have been at a loose end in the main school. An issue that they could have had was a building, for the drain issue proved to be an extensive problem.

Thankfully Jack and Rosalie offered their house as a base; As they said, they really did have more room than a family of 5 required. Although neither of them would have admitted it to Jem and Madge, the extra income from the rent that Madge insisted on paying made a big difference to their own funds, as did the option for Rosalie to continue to work, for she would never have accepted reduced fees for the girls at the school if she was no longer working there. She was proud and wanted no charity, so would have insisted on paying full school fees, despite the fact that the Russells truly did see them as family now.

Doris Trelawny was happy with the plan as well, and proved to be just what was needed for the social care side of things normally covered by a matron. Mary Lou herself was initially upset to be parted from Clem, and Vi Lucy. The ease of journeys to the Island for the Lucy and Chester girls meant that they had gone along with the main school. In fact most of Mary Lou's little 'gang' were following the main school, but she was a resilient little soul, and proud as could be to be given the title of Head Girl of the prep. Verity Anne was very much surprised, however to be given the role of Second Prefect.

"Are you sure about that?" Rosalie asked, with some concern. She lived next door to Doris Trelawny, and had come to know Verity Anne more than she would have done at school. "She really is a terrible mooner. If it wasn't for Mary Lou, I doubt that she would ever get organised for anything she had to get to before it was well past the time to come back !"

Madge laughed, but replied seriously.

"That is exactly WHY I'm suggesting it. With a little responsibility now, she may well shake herself out of this tendency to drift. Never underestimate the power of shame - she's proud to be Second Prefect, and after all it doesn't really mean an awful lot of responsibility, as the prep school is so small. Everyone else is much younger than those two, so it also gives her a reason to think about other people occasionally. She'll have to think about her own behaviour if she is in charge of younger girls, which will do her no harm."

Rosalie still looked doubtful, but Madge was determined.

"I've seen it before, and she's just the sort of age where that sort of thing - mooning about, I mean - becomes habit. She isn't a bad girl at all. She just doesn't realise the impact her actions have on others. Doris Trelawny means well, but she is already too soft about such things. I think she's secretly enjoying having a less tomboyish girl than Mary Lou, and is starting to wrap the girl in cotton wool. Her father is clearly feeling guilty that he left her for so many years, so he doesn't interfere at all, leaves it all to Doris. And much as she is a very sweet woman, she really isn't cut out to be a parent. She allows her to get away with things she ought to have begun to grow out of; In fact old Mrs Trelawny admitted that there was the same problem with Mary Lou running rings around her mother discipline wise, until she decided to take a hand herself. Doris is a lovely lady, but far too gentle to be as firm as a mother must on occasion."

Rosalie was still doubtful, but the two girls were much the oldest in the school, so she saw the logic of the appointment. Whether Verity Anne would leave it all to the irrepressible Mary Lou, only time would tell.

\---

Madge didn't neglect the new main branch, despite the excitement of her new venture, and she was there to welcome them to "The Big House" on St Brivails. She knew well enough that Miss Annerlsey and Miss Wilson could manage without her, however, so soon returned to Howells, ready and keen for the Prep term to start a few days later. Joey was glad to see her sister get back some of her snap and vigour, and even more pleased to still be able to spend time with her nieces and the Triplets.

The only upset came halfway through the first term. Jem had been asked to go to Canada, and discuss some of their research. He had initially planned on going, and taking Madge and the girls at least. He too had felt that Madge wasn't quite herself, and wanted a complete change for her. However Joey's return, and the prep school project had brought his wife back to herself, and he didn't want to disturb that, so he put the Canada project off a few times, trying to decide what to do. The solution, when he thought about it, became obvious after both Margot and Con Maynard gave everyone a scare by being badly affected by the throat infection caused by the bad drains. 

They had managed to miss the infections when the rest of the school had had them, by virtue of being Day Girls, and Rosalie keeping them at home until the worst was over. However visits to oversee the building work led to a second wave of infections amongst the adults, and the two weaker Triplets followed. Both girls were badly affected, Con especially, and finally she was removed to the San to give her the best chance of one to one care and survival. There were several days when Jem was sure that he would have to give Jack the worst news, but the tiny girl pulled through. It left her pale and fragile however, and even if the Prep School plan hadn't happened, Jem would have forbidden the idea of her going to a misty, foggy place like the Island.

He broached the idea of Canada to Jack, and he and Rosalie jumped at the chance. They were happy enough for the Prep School to continue in their house while they were away, and they knew that the bracing air of canada, and a complete change of scene would be ideal for Con, and good for both Len and Margot. Joey just about held herself in check when she heard, for to have the girls going so far away when she had had so little time with them felt like a nightmare. She had spent a lot of time with Con during her illness, able to sympathise in a way that only those who have been through such things can. 

She had moments when she wanted to be selfish, to search for any possible reason that the family should stay. However she knew only too well how important the time in the Alps had been for her escaping her own chest weakness; As much as she wanted to be near them, she loved all of the triplets, and wanted the best for them. The move was only a temporary one after all, and would make all the difference to the girls. So it was that Joey found herself for the first time being in the crowd waving loved ones off across the Atlantic, while she herself stayed in England.

She threw herself into her work, and into helping Madge with the prep school wherever possible. The one off contract with the studio had quickly become an open ended one, as the British audiences warmed to her in the same way the American ones had a year or so before. She found the film industry in England far less well funded than she was used to, but that made things much more interesting. She liked to see the ingenuity of the prop department, reusing and mending things, the wartime shortages of some items still evident even now.

She had expected to have to earn her respect in the cast, after the media attacks while she was away during the war, and she was right. Many people had assumed that she would have a high sense of importance, and were ready to bring her down to size, or ignore her. Thankfully, her own nature quickly worked in her favour, and she didn't have many issues after the first, and even those who had been sure that they would hate her came to respect her strong work ethic and willingness to listen to everybody.

Her ability with languages also gave her an unexpected benefit. Sometimes the films were sold in other countries, and the studio would dub the words. Her fluency and lack of accent meant that she could do her own work for this, which gave her a welcome extra source of income, and added interest for her to what could otherwise be somewhat formulaic work. The studios were producing several films in a very short space of time, and Joey almost found herself able to guess the next line or scene type. Every few films however, she would get something that she could really sink her teeth into, and those roles made the 'bread and butter' comedies and musicals worth while.

The film industry was full of people from all nations, for many creative people had fled their homelands during the war, and decided to stay on when they saw how the film industry was growing. Joey had many long conversations into the night with the scriptwriters, finding the similarities and differences between her own writing practices and theirs fascinating. They on their own side were grateful for the respect she showed them, when so many people seemed to see their words as flexible, or mere guidelines. Joey wasn't shy about suggesting a different line, but she did so TO them, or in a polite way, rather than the blatent disregard some showed for the original script at times. Joey understood their frustration, but also knew that a script, unlike a book, needed to be a living, changing thing. The best actors knew their characters well enough to sense how a line should be rephrased, and to know that their own lines couldn't dominate the story. Their additions or substitutions might upset the author, but added to the film as a whole. It was those stars with an overinflated sense of their own talent that really upset the script writers. They saw the story only as it related to them, and it was a constant battle for script writers not to lose the momentum of a tale while one actor or another added unnecessary words.

These little diversions, and seeing the creations of the story from all sides made it all the more interesting, and Joey felt that she was learning more each day than she had at any time in the past. The nature of the studio allowed her to mix with many other actors and actresses, for there were often a mixture of popular comedies and more serious dramas being made in parallel, even using some of the same sets. She often had short gaps, not long enough to go home, but enough time to go quietly to another stage, and watch the performances of some of her own heroes and heroines.

She was saddened to realise that the West End community was less forgiving. There were too many people with suspicions about her loyalty, and too great a system of politics and roles gained through personal contacts and socialising. The film experience made her less appealing to them, not more, and the few suggestions friends made for roles for her didn't end up happening once the role was finally cast. There was a snobbishness about film work in the theatre world, and Joey wasn't going to limit herself to just one part of her career. She also enjoyed the team feeling in the studios, and the fun of seeing herself on screen eventually. She was rapidly becoming known as a comedy actress with musical ability, which led to her films being amended to always include at least a few songs.

It followed on naturally that she be approached to release a record, and Joey was thrilled when it became one of the most popular releases of the year. She hadn't been that aware of her fame during the previous record release. This time, she was amazed to find herself a household name again, despite all of the rumours about her loyalty in the war still following her on occasion. She had been touring so much before that she hadn't really had time to be aware of her picture being all over the place, and it took this period of relative stability for her to understand the true scale of her fame.

Of course, not everyone was as accepting, for every now and again there were aggressive comments, or nasty cat calls in amongst the pleas for attention or autographs. Unfortunately, her role during the war couldn't be revealed, and the damage done by the war office seeding a false reputation for her meant that some newspapers still made issues about her being "Suspected of Nazi sympathies" or "Considered a security risk".

Still, in general things went well, for Joey at least, and the months turned easily into a year, and she began to feel a sense of stability, of home that she hadn't had for so many years. She certainly didn't miss America just now, for so many of her friends were being interrogated about their suspected communist sympathies, and the studio system was in turmoil with it all. If it wasn't for the Maynards being away, and weather, which really didn't suit her tendency to chest weakness, Joey honestly would considered herself totally settled. Both factors however, were to stop being an issue soon, and would add an extra chapter to her life that she hadn't expected at all.

\---

"Penny for them?"

Hilary started, and looked over at Nancy, who was leaning against the wooden shelter, trying not to show how cold she was. Nancy was still working in London, and mainly in well heated offices. She often bemoaned the fact that, being a games mistress and used to it, Hilary considered it normal to be out in all weathers; however she'd been trying her best on this occasion not to show her discomfort.

They'd managed a rare weekend away, and decided to explore the Bosherton Lily Pools, being relatively local to Hilary, but far enough away not to be noticed by staff or girls from the school. It meant a long journey for Nancy, but she was relatively lucky with her time off, and had managed to get a day either side of the trip off, allowing them the rare privilege of unrushed time together.

Hilary started to respond, then saw how blue Nancy's lips were, and the barely suppressed shivering.

"Oh I am an ass!" She exclaimed. "Here I am oblivious to everything, and you are freezing to death. Let's get warmed up, and then I'll tell you my thoughts - not that they are worth even a ha'penny, I'd say."

Nancy looked cheeky and hopeful at the idea of being warmed up by Hilary, and looked around to see if they were overlooked at all. Unfortunately she'd forgotten her partner's active nature, and realised quickly enough that Hilary intended exercise of a different nature. Ten sprints back and forth between the shelter and a nearby bridge, followed by a brisk walk to the nearby village however, did do the job of warming them up nicely, and they had the rare luxury of a whole night together in a nearby hotel after all.

"Remind me why I let you torture me?" She puffed, face glowing after the exertion.

"Because you love me, and it's good for you" was the immodest answer, and there was no arguing with that. "You've warmed up, haven't you? Well then."

Nancy didn't even try to debate the point. For one thing she wanted to know what had made Hilary look so sad back at the Lily pools. For another, she knew that she had never felt fitter than the past year or two. She'd always been comfortably lazy, and happy enough to remain plump and unfit. However Hilary had the active temperament of a games mistress, and so just by keeping pace with her on walks, Nancy had begun to tone and lose the extra weight. Realising quite how much better she felt for that, she'd begun to take more walks herself when at home, and been happily surprised by how far she could now walk or run without getting breathless. 

A year or two earlier she would have laughed at the idea of doing sprints of any kind, but now she found she enjoyed it. They wandered along, as close to being hand in hand as they could without drawing attention to themselves. Hilary pondered on it, for she knew that other women often walked arm in arm or hand in hand with no comment. 

Somehow, however since Nancy had become fitter, people seemed to guess them to be a couple far more easily, so they had learnt to be extra cautious. Hilary's short bob perhaps didn't help, for it was relatively unusual even now for someone of her age, but she simply couldn't stand the idea of all that extra hair blowing around when trying to referee a game.

Nancy wasn't going to let her avoid the topic any more, so Hilary tried to put her previous thoughts into words. Initially those words struck terror into the heart of her companion, sure that they were the beginning of a 'This isn't working' speech, but as Hilary warmed to the subject, the younger woman realised that the opposite was true.

"It's...oh it's everything really, Nance." She muttered, looking down at her feet as she spoke. "You, me. The future. People getting married..."

Nancy felt a familiar pain, and wished, not for the first time, that they lived in a more enlightened time. She knew that many of their contemporaries were marrying, settling down with a husband and children, and she secretly feared that Hilary might change her mind, might decide that this was a future that she preferred. Thankfully Hilary's next words allayed that fear, wistful as she sounded, it wasn't for a husband and wedding ring.

"I just wish... That we could have a little of that. A house maybe, or a flat. No risk of being discovered, fear of losing our jobs or friends if they knew." She twisted a bit of string around her hand as she talked, unconsciously winding and unwinding along the length of her finger.

"We can, I've told you often enough, I've done the training to be a maths mistress, there's no reason that I have to stay in london now. We could get a flat, work in a school nearby, or two different schools if you prefer. Be 'old maids who lost their fiances in the war' or similar..."

Nancy couldn't help but show the hope in her voice. She'd broached the subject before, but Hilary had only relatively recently joined the Chalet School as a mistress, and she wasn't ready to leave and start a new life. And she hadn't been willing for Nancy to give up a career she enjoyed to become a teacher, when she had shown no inclination that way at all before. Now, things were different, however. The shortage of trained men to do Nancy's specialist work had meant that she could continue after the war. However as the next generation of boys came through, the disparity between their salaries and job options and those for a woman was becoming depressingly obvious. Her becoming fitter, thinner and less obviously feminine had also led to rumours about her, and she struggled to keep their situation quiet. There had been several nasty incidents recently, where she had been threatened on her way to and from work.

Nancy had decided that she needed to make a move, and some sage advice from Nell Wilson had led her to more seriously consider teaching. It remained a job where one was expected to remain single if you wanted a career, and in contrast to Hilary's situation, fewer women chose to teach Maths, so there wasn't the competition for jobs. She would have applied to the Chalet School, but knew that they already had Miss Edwards, and Miss Slater for mathematics, and so she had considered other local options. In fact, unbeknownst to Hilary, she had an interview the following day at Carnbach grammar, and had been looking into the possibility of lodgings in the town.

Had she told Hilary about the threats and the job problems, she would have been better able to convince her. But her friend had no intention of risking Nancy's career, and refused to entertain the idea as anything more than a fantasy. Also, if she was honest with herself, she loved her own job, and didn't want to give it up. However the holiday had shown her that she missed Nancy too much to continue to live this way. That had been the reason for the sad look, for she would miss the Chalet School. However, she'd just about made up her mind to apply for a role in a London school, and surprise Nancy with a fait accompli if she got the placement.

The pair began to wend their way back to the hotel, neither quite telling the other their thoughts, but pleased to realise that they each missed the other sorely in termtime. Nancy was wondering vaguely whether anyone at the hotel would notice if they skipped dinner and went straight to bed, when a voice hailed them from across the street, and they both turned in surprise, automatically drawing a little further apart just in case.

"Nancy too!" The tall man beamed at them. "What a surprise ! I haven't seen either of you in years!"

With a start, they recognised Phil Graves, and exclamations and explanations came on all sides. Phil's ability to cope had improved amazingly in recent years, and he found himself automatically falling into friendly chatter with the pair, finally inviting them to his home, shared with his two sisters. They thought a little wistfully of their planned evening alone, but the opportunity to catch up with the normally reclusive Phil was too important to pass up. Both of them had remained in contact with Joey, and knew that he hadn't made contact with her, so they were curious as to this friendly welcome. In fact, Phil had finally begun to remember more of his pre war self, and to realise that he hadn't made up the relationship, that he and Joey had been good friends as well as romantic partners. He had gained in confidence, and and was now berating himself for not making contact when everyone was telling him to do so.

Seeing the couple, who he considered friends after their time in a shared flat with Joey, he had let his instincts direct him, and decided that he had to make the next step, had to find out at least whether Joey would ever want any contact. He also remembered the pair as excellent company, and now that he had begun to recover himself more, he was finding the small community of Bosherton to be somewhat staid and stifling.

For Hilary and Nancy, it was a wonderful feeling, as Phil quite clearly remembered and respected that they were a couple, and treated them as such, although always with discretion around strangers. 

They spent an enjoyable evening, exchanging news, and getting to know each other again. It wasn't until the very end that Nancy, forgetting herself, mentioned how Joey reacted to a long ago prank by a friend of theirs, that Phil fell silent. They tried hastily to fill the conversation gap, but with a lot of effort, he made himself ask the question he had avoided all evening.

"Do you think... I haven't been in contact for so long, it ... has been complicated," he muttered, not looking either of them in the eye. "She must have so many people writing to her after all, but I wanted... I want to make amends, apologise for rushing off like that."

Hilary and Nancy were stuck for how to answer. They really didn't know how Joey would feel, although they knew that she'd been trying in the past to contact Phil. They felt sure that she would respond positively, and would be careful with the man's feelings, for they all knew that he had had a difficult war. It had been wonderful to have this reunion, and Joey was an obvious missing part of their little group. So they encouraged Phil to try again, and gave him Joey's most up to date work address. They didn't feel that they ought to give out her home address, just in case, but they knew that the studios had a very efficient system, and as long as something was marked 'Personal' Joey had a good chance of getting to see it.

So it was that a week or so later, Phil Graves stood before the local post box, and made the final move in regaining his memory, posting the letter to

"Joey Wilson, Peppermint Studios, Buckinghamshire"

It was done. He just had to hope that the letter reached her, and not an assistant who might think him a fan and dismiss it. 

There was nothing to do but wait and see.


	18. Chapter 18

"Jack! Jack? Where are you?"

Rosalie's voice came floating up to him, and Jack blinked his eyes open and looked blearily at the clock. He had only meant to come and lie down briefly, now it was suddenly an hour later, and here he was, flat out on the bed, still in his travel clothes. As he sat up wearily and rubbed his face, his wife's head peered around the doorway.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Jack! I'd never have called so loudly if I'd realised" she said, coming in and sitting next to him. "We still have a good hour before we need to go to the girls' school play. Why..."

She began to ask why he hadn't changed before having a nap, then took in the crumpled bedcovers and realised that he obviously hadn't intended falling asleep. She put her lips together firmly. This situation couldn't go on.

Jack's original tour in Canada had gone very well, but finished some months before. However the improvement in all of the girls, and in fact in Rosalie's own health and happiness had been so great that they'd been loathe to take them all back to England just yet. Jack's work with the San meant that he could only do a very small amount at a distance, so he'd been trying to commute, returning every two weeks. He never complained, although his temper was shorter than normal, and was adamant that all was fine. But Rosalie was no fool, it was clearly too much for him, and the girls were missing their father having enough energy to play properly.

Rosalie thought sadly of how peaceful and happy this year in Canada had been. She hadn't realised just how much she missed the mountains, with crisp cold air and none of the dampness that always made Con cough so much. If she was honest, it had been nice being away from everyone that they knew, as well, even while she had missed them. Being so close to everyone from the San and School in Armishire had meant that they rarely had time to just be a young couple with a family.

Selfishly she would like to stay, try to build themselves a life here, at least for another year or so. But she knew Jack loved his work, and if she was honest she was curious as to how the school was going on. She'd enjoyed her time as secretary, and the plaintive messages she had from Hilda and Nell told her that she was missed.

The girls loved their new school in Canada and chattered away in French almost as easily as English now, but even they had mentioned wistfully that they missed their friends. The three of them were so self sufficient within themselves from the start of joining their new school that they hadn't really made any close pals in Canada. Now they were a little older, that was becoming more noticeable, and Rosalie wanted them to have outside friends eventually if possible. In the terms before they left for Canada, the three had spent time in a small group of juniors and Con had started chumming with Josette Russell, even while Len and Margot remained inseparable.

The options for working in Canada were difficult to determine, and it seemed likely that Jack would have to start at a lower level to prove himself, and there were already a lot of specialists researching in the area, which was why they'd been invited over in the first place. So it made much more sense for them to return than keep up this mad channel hopping that Jack was trying to do. She said as much to her husband, but he shook his head.

"The atmosphere here is so much better for Con and Margot," He said, trying not to frown as his headache began to develop further. "And it's made Len much less of a worrier, having those two able to keep up with her properly. They need to stay at least a few more months, then we'll see."

"If only we could go back to Austria." Rosalie replied, automatically rubbing his shoulders to try to relieve some of the tension. "The air there was just like this, I remember feeling as though I'd come home, as soon as winter came last year."

Jack turned to look at her, surprised by this. If anyone had asked him where his wife would have considered 'home', he would have said Taverton, or England at least, but her comment suggested otherwise.

She picked up on his expression and explained.

"Oh I don't mean that England isn't special to me, of course it is," she murmured, kneading a particularly tough knot out near his neck as she talked.

"But the Tirol was always such a fun, happy and safe place. Until the Nazis of course. Madame - see there you go, am getting very nostalgic there. Madge I mean - was always ... so kind ... and really made me feel part of the family, even though I was there as a pupil, then employee."

He nodded, unable to reply initially, for the pain from her actions was too great, much as he knew the relief in his neck and head afterwards would be worth it. 

Jem and Madge Russell had made him feel very welcome as a young doctor, and he knew just what Rosalie meant. He too had missed the air, and the less crowded, simpler form of life in the mountains.

"Unfortunately it seems quite unlikely that the San will be able to move back to the Tirol, with the situation the way it is." He replied eventually, once he was able to unclench his jaw as her massage began to work. His headache started to clear too as he felt his shoulders and neck able to move again properly.

Rosalie knew this, for they often daydreamed about being able to return to the Tirol or elsewhere in Austria. In recent years. Madge and Jem had seemed less concerned about this, happy with their lives in England, but it used to be something that all four had planned and debated, an ultimate return of San and School to the Alps.

"Anyway - there isn't anything we can do to move the politics along, much as we might want to." Jack said firmly, and got up from the bed stretching his tired, jet lagged body and starting to change for the evening at the Triplets' play. 

Rosalie took the hint and left the topic for now, but she wasn't to be dissuaded. Jack couldn't go on like this, and it was expensive, all this travelling. Happily the rent for Madge using their house in Armishire for the prep school was covering it, but once the school proper moved back to Howells, staying here would be a big strain on their finances.

No, she thought to herself, this dream world in Canada had to stop. They needed to return, and before the girls got too far on in their education to be badly affected by the change. She would stay for the rest of term, but after that the Maynards were going to be together, whichever side of the Atlantic they ended up. Since Jack would struggle to find his level of work in such a specialist subject here, it must be back in England. The girls were much better now, and hopefully this little bit of extra time would cement their health firmly enough to cope with the English weather.

Jack however wouldn't hear of it. It wasn't often that he put his foot down, or that they even disagreed, but he was not to be moved. He wanted the girls to have at least another year in the mountain environment, and if that meant that he had to leave the San, then it did. He could see himself that the commuting hadn't worked, he was so tired that he was of no great use to anyone, work or family wise. His work was important to him, but his family always came first.

\---

"Miss Wilson? We are ready to begin."

Joey stopped staring out over the valley below and turned with a smile to the director's assistant. She still occasionally forgot her professional name, and more than once had looked around for Nell. In recent months however she had been called little else, for she was working with a totally new team. She had decided at the beginning of the new year that she needed a break from endless days on a built set, and had let her agent know that she was interested in going on location for her next project. He had been able to find her a role in a musical comedy set in Austria, and Joey had been initially thrilled, then slightly disappointed to realise that the filming would in fact take place in Switzerland.

The moment that she had arrived in the Oberland however, she lost that slight sense of woe, and had been enjoying every minute of her time back in the Alps. The majority of the filming was being done in various mountainous areas, and she found herself finally throwing off her niggling little cough and even getting a little colour to her cheeks. So much so that the make up artists often threw their hands up in despair at trying to keep the continuity with earlier scenes. The director was an observant man however, and the story involved a young city girl coming to Austria and gaining in health and happiness in the mountains. Joey's own transformation was a gift, and he was the first to see that it was worth being flexible. He looked at the schedule, and rearranged the scenes so that, in an unusual situation for a film, they performed the story almost in exact order, like a play.

Joey finished her part, and went back over to look at the view while her co star took a few extra takes, and the extras were marshalled into place for the next scene. They were filming in an old abandoned ski resort, and the peace of the place struck Joey as almost magical in quality. She was filled with memories of the Sonnalpe, and had written page upon page to Madge and Jem about the area, until they had finally given in, and were to visit her the following week.

She had always been impulsive, but no decision had come to her as quickly and as firmly as this one. She wanted to live here. She had already been able to take advantages of short breaks in the filming to visit Freida and Simone, had come across various old friends in the surrounding area, and felt more alive and healthy than she had for some years. She had even found herself beginning to write again, and a novel had begun to take form, with a young unmarried woman scared and afraid, giving up her child, then meeting them again many years later. It had only reached first draft stage, but she had a good feeling about it, thought her older readers would enjoy it.

So she was determined, and had been driving and walking all around the area, trying to find a place to live. Each time however, she came back to the fact that the area they were filming in was perfect. It was run down, for the weather and fussiness of the market had changed and there were other more popular ski resorts nearby. The only problem was that the main house she liked the look of, a small chalet with views across the valley, was close to two other large buildings, the main hotel and a large pension, both set to close that summer and be put on the market. If they were knocked down and developed into many smaller houses, she would have no privacy, and would also probably lose her view, for some of the land belonging to the hotel passed in front of her windows. It was when bemoaning the fact that it couldn't stay a hotel any more that her grand scheme was born, and Joey was impatient to see what her sister and brother in law said.

Jem and Madge arrived, looking forward to no more than a break, but became caught up in her enthusiasm. She had been thinking mainly of the San, and suggested the smaller Pension next door as a good place for a finishing branch of the school only in passing. However Jem and Madge were more aware of the logistics of these things, and the distance of the hotel from the coach road made them wary.

"We'd need to work out how the logistics of the San would work, but I think you are right Joey, this is an ideal location. Whether we should move the school though, I just don't know. That would be your department, Madge. What do you think?"

Madge looked thoughtfully out over the hotel grounds, mentally allocating one area as a cricket pitch, another for tennis courts, and imagining the girls enjoying themselves with the winter sports the resort could still provide. She wasn't sure though. The school, had undergone a lot of upheaval in the last decade, she wasn't sure about moving the whole thing. A sixth form, or maybe finishing school, now that would work. In fact a friend whose daughter went to the Chalet school had been asking for recommendations for a good finishing school only the previous week.

She eyed the large pension next to the hotel. It didn't solve Joey's worries about development in front of her own home, but it might well be a good way of testing the idea. She needed to look at the possible numbers of girls applying, and that would tell her what the demand would be for a finishing branch out here on the. Gornetz Platz.

Joey was thrilled that they were considering the idea so seriously. She had thoroughly fallen in love with the new place, but it would be even better if they could establish the San up here. She could see that the little community was beginning to fall apart, for there were few jobs now that the hotel was closing.

Madge and Jem refused to be drawn into making any sort of commitment, however, and Joey had to sustain herself with the fact that they were at least considering the idea. Whatever happened, she had decided that she had to get out of England, for the nastier of the reports about her loyalty meant that she couldn't easily settle somewhere without some sort of media attention, and the climate wasn't ideal for her. 

She had been reminded by this film how much she liked location work, so she knew that her home would be only for breaks between films, she would be travelling wherever the work took her. What hadn't occurred to her was Jem's suggestion to ask the hotel if she could buy the land in front of and beside her chalet, then the risk of development wasn't such a concern. She whooped like a mad thing when she realised the sense of this, and rushed off to the agents, to find that there were no objections from the owners of the hotel, as long as she paid immediately, since they were struggling with cash flow. Joey had kept a large amount of her wages in savings, well aware of the dry periods that can mark a performer's career. This meant that she was an ideal buyer, and so the process was shortened greatly, much to her glee.

Madge and Jem had returned with Nell and Hilda, to discuss the possibilities for the school, and she could tell that they were all very tempted by the idea. Nell herself seemed to brighten in the alpine air, and had a spring in her step that hadn't been there for some time. They couldn't justify the purchase of the hotel or pension quite yet, but a house a little further down the mountain at Welsen had fallen free, so they made the decision to start small, and see how that venture went. Joey was delighted, for she had always got on well with Nell, and a few of the staff she had known in Austria were likely to come out with the finishing branch. This made her decision for her, since her one concern had been being a little lonely if the Platz did totally fail as a tourist destination. She had a sneaking suspicion that if Nell came out, Hilda would be sure to follow.

So before their visit was up, she checked the details through with Madge and Jem, made her final offer and signed for the purchase of her house and land. She hugged the papers to her with glee, and danced around like a mad thing, in a way that Jem and Madge hadn't seen since she was a teenager. This, if Joey had only known it, out the final stamp on their own plans, for the difference in her health and happiness in this environment was huge. If the air and atmosphere was this good for her, it would probably be even better for patients of a San and young relatives of the patients. Jem and Madge were playing it safe by trying out the finishing school first, and making enquiries as to the state of the roads up to the Platz, but they were very tempted by the idea. They themselves had felt like they were a young married couple again, the similarities in feel to the Sonnalpe were so great, and having a wildly excited Jo around, looking barely older than 15 herself, had completed the illusion.

Joey grinned madly at them as she waved them off home, and returned to her guesthouse, still smiling as she though of how soon it would be that she could start to decorate her own house, the first she had ever owned. She wandered along, pondering whether she could have an open fire in any of the rooms, it was something she had come to love in England, although most of the chalets were heated by large stoves and central heating.

"Fraulein Bettany?" The call came from the guesthouse hallway, and she turned to the owner with a warm smile.

"Frau Holder? Ahhhh, die Postsack! Danke." She took the heavy bag from the lady, and carried it up to her room. She knew that she really ought to have an assistant check the letters in England, for it was expensive to have them all forwarded here. However she still wanted to have some control over her own letters, see her fanmail as it arrived, for she was sure that this brief burst of fame wouldn't last, so she treasured every one. There were always some nasty letters within the piles of thanks and praise, but those too she would rather see herself, know the worst rather than be protected like so many of her costars were from anything negative.

She poured the letters onto the table up in her room and rapidly sorted them into letters for "Bettany" or "Wilson", since her real name and stage name were a useful filter. Letters to Joey Bettany were usually from friends and family vs letters to the actress Joey Wilson, or to the author Josephine M. Bettany. 

The 'Wilson' pile she swept to one side for now, since it was almost always fanmail, and she was too busy to read all of them right now. As she looked at the collection from the previous delivery, she realised that she really did need some help, at least in opening the letters and maybe prioritising them. 

Daisy had recently mentioned a school friend of hers who was starting out looking for secretarial work, she might ask her for the girl's name, it would be nice to be able to help someone from the Chalet School, even if it was only a temporary thing. She would call tomorrow, see how quickly something could be arranged, as there were now several weeks worth of Joey Wilson fan letters needing to be opened. 

She took her personal letters off to the balcony to sit and look through them, enjoying the sunshine and the start of this new, exciting phase of her life. There was a little sadness for being so far from Madge, but she was working so much that she would possibly see her more, for she would now be moving towards bigger projects with a few months imbetween them, which would allow for visits to friends and to have people to stay in her new home. She had struggled with living in London, for it reminded her too greatly of Phil, and even visits to Howells had held a little sadness, for she'd had to come to terms with the fact that he wouldn't contact her now, didn't want to know her.

She was a lot nearer to everyone than she had been when in America. Jack and Rosalie seemed likely to stay in Canada for some time, but they would surely return, maybe even to the Platz if the new San happened, so she was hopeful that all those she loved would be nearby, or at least not too far away.

She didn't have a reason to stay in England after all, so she could look towards this adventure with an open heart.

\---

Dear Hilary,

I hope you are getting on well, and the weather there has improved. Your description in your last letter sounded very damp and miserable !

I have News with a capital N - I've signed for my own house out here ! I hadn't mentioned anything in case the plan didn't work out, but in a month or so I will be the proud owner of my first ever house! Well - Chalet, but you know what I mean. It feels very grown up, and slightly scary, but I feel so good out here, as if I have finally come back home, so I have taken the plunge. 

I hope that you and Nancy will come out here to visit me, the skiing is supposed to be fantastic - and I fully intend on challenging you both to a snowball fight, so be warned !

I have other news too - I have a visitor, an old girl from the Dark Ages, will give you three guesses who it is... Let me know if you guessed it, I wonder whether you will or not ... Well anyway - it's Biddy O'Ryan! 

She has made the trek to Switzerland to visit me while she tries to work out what to do now that she's back from Australia. You may already know all this, as she said she had seen Nancy when she was passing through London, but Biddy had been acting as companion for a friend who was very ill. Unfortunately she died, and Biddy didn't feel there was anything she could do but help the girl's mother with the younger children. I can't believe how long it is since I have seen her, but now she's back, and a good thing too, she needs some distraction. I think she is still slightly grieving for her friend.

In fact it would have been better all round if she had turned up just a few months earlier, or Mary Burnett had waited just a little longer for her wedding. I had Hilda and Nell bemoaning the fact that they'd already filled the history post before finding out that she was back and looking for work. They had to, of course, when Mary Burnett left, and there was no one suitable to fill in while they looked for the ideal candidate. They are being very polite, but I'm pretty sure that the girl they have taken on is far from ideal. The main thing seems to be that she isn't keen on teaching in three different languages I think. It's a difficult one, as Biddy would have no problem with that, and would be a wonderful teacher I am sure. They are stuck with this woman however, as she isn't bad enough to justify taking the job away from her, especially to give to an old girl. It wouldn't be fair.

Now, talking about jobs, I must come to the main points of my letter - I've heard from Hilda that you've given your notice in, and are being very secretive about why. I can guess, and I'm only hoping that it works out well for you. I heard about Nancy getting the maths job at Carnbach grammar, through the old girl grapevine (aka Biddy!) and I am guessing that you have taken the role of PT mistress there or somewhere nearby? I hope so, you two have spent far too much time apart, I am now imagining you in some little house somewhere, getting all domesticated and houseproud. Let me know your new address, one way or the other, won't you? I hope that I am right and it isn't anything bad that has taken you from the Chalet fold.

Anyway, I must get this finished and ready for the post. I have a mountain of letters that I am totally failing to climb. A young girl that Daisy recommended is coming tomorrow to take on the role of my secretary, which again makes me feel very grown up and sensible ! But I've had to admit defeat, and though I still want to see each of the letters, I do need someone to screen the Joey Wilson ones, and let me know which ones are urgent and which can wait. She's an old girl of the school, one Gillian Culver - do you remember her at all?

I don't know her, she was after my time, but she apparently is very reliable, and is looking for a bit of excitement and to see foreign lands, so she will suit me well, hopefully.

With love to you and Nancy,

Joey

\----------

Oh Joey !

I wish that your suggestions were true, and I had a comfy little role nearby. Nancy has got the Carnbach job, on that front your gossip was correct, only I didn't realise until after I accepted one in London ! I was sure that Nancy would object, as she knows I loved my job, so I didn't tell her until I'd given in my notice. I said no in the end to the London job, as I was only going there to be near to Nancy, which won't work if she is here ! 

I'm a little unsure what to do, as once Hilda realised that I couldn't be convinced to stay, they got straight onto Peggy Burnett, who she knew was looking for a job. I wouldn't feel right taking Peggy's first job away from her, so I can't go back and beg for forgiveness. At the moment I am staying with Nancy and not working while I try to work out what to do. We are hoping that a role at her school might fall vacant, as it has been so nice seeing each other every day, I'm not sure that I could go back to living in a school further away, but there aren't a lot of job options around here. 

So perhaps your image of domesticity isn't too far off, I am currently sending my breadwinner partner off to work each day and trying to find my inner housewife. I'm afraid she may be buried very deep, I don't enjoy it at all ! I have missed work terribly, although Peggy Burnett, bless her, is over here at every opportunity to ask my advice. She is a little overwhelmed I think, especially as so many of the other mistresses were there when she was at school. It isn't that long ago that she was a pupil, now she is not only a mistress, but a very busy one. I admit that I was struggling a little myself the last few terms, I had to rely on the prefects an awful lot to help me out. With no real experience she is a little shy of asking them to help enough, I think.

I've been trying to wait and see if you mentioned it, but the curiosity is driving me mad - did you ever get a letter from Phil Graves ? I didn't tell you as he was determined that he wanted to make contact first himself, but we (Nancy and I) met him while we were at Bosherton Lily Pools, and he seemed much better than Jack described. He wanted to get in touch with you, apologise for not having contacted you, and we didn't know quite what to do. We didn't like to give him your personal address, so we told him to write to the studios, did you ever get the letter ? We told him to mark it Private, like we do, so that it gets to you personally.

Congratulations on your new house, we will start saving up for the journey, skiing sounds good. And as for the snowball fight, you are on, though be prepared to lose !

Gillian Culver is a good girl, she was always helpful and thoughtful, so you will have no problems there, I'm sure. I hear that Biddy is still staying with you, can you pass on to her that she caused a minor sensation at the Chalet, a young girl who met her at Penny Rest took it upon herself to run away TO school - that's right - TO ! She was fed up with her aunt, who does sound a selfish soul, and so bought her own uniform, tagged along with the girls and arrived in our midst uninvited, so to speak! She is to stay in the end, Peggy Burnett tells me, so she had her wish, but it has been a most unorthodox way to get into a school !

Love,

Hilary

P.S Nancy says is the swiss coffee as nectarlike as she remembers it being in Austria ? WHY she wants to know, I don't know, but I asked her if she had anything she wanted to add, and that was it, believe it or not!

\---------

Dear Hilary,

Our letters very nearly crossed, I opened yours literally half an hour after finding the letter from Phil. Or rather Gillian finding it. Bless the girl, she had obviously picked up that this man might be someone close to me, for she was bright red about having opened it, depite it being her job to do so. I forgot to make it clear that it is only on the Joey Bettany letters that the "Private" tag really works - someone obviously let slip about it in a fan magazine, and nearly all of the Joey Wilson letters say "Private" now, so I tend not to pay attention to it.

This one exception really WAS private, and I can only be glad that Gillian is clearly tustworthy and discrete. If that letter had been opened at the studios it might have been national gossip that I had had a romance with a POW and left him, which would have been a nightmare for us both with all the media attention it would have brought to us. It isn't Phil's fault - it's clearly been a difficult letter for him to write, and he has remembered things quite correctly, and he is doing all he can to show that he knows that I hadn't wanted to marry him, and he only wants to be friends. Only his letter doesn't specify that I left him before he was soldier, much less an injured POW, so it would have looked as though I'd dropped him due to his condition. The papers would have loved that !

I don't know quite what to do, as I feel that we need to talk in person, but he must have sent this letter well over a month ago, if not more. I have written a note to let him know what happened, and that I am thrilled (for I am) that he has contacted me, but will write more soon. Only I have no idea quite what to write in the next letter. I have a lot I need to talk to him about, but I don't want to scare the man, put him back at all.

How did he seem when you saw him? I think I need to see him in person to talk about everything, but I'm nervous, he could be so different to the Phil I remember, and I know these men damaged by the war can be quite different. I don't feel I can risk a visit alone, but equally I don't want a crowd. Help! I have no idea what to do.

I do have a solution for you, however. This is top secret, but there are definite rumblings about the school moving to Switzerland. Why don't you ask Hilda and Nell if they would consider you for part of the PT staff in either the main or the finishing branch? I know that Hilda was seriously considering having two PT mistresses, since she was convinced that you had left because you were overworked. I would bet that she is only holding off getting another one till things are finalised with the school. TALK to her, my dear, it is worth asking.

Or possibly, and this is PURELY speculation, you might be better to talk to Bill, about both you and Nancy - I can't say for sure, but I think she might well understand better than anyone. You know my theory about her from our drunken evenings discussing such things in the flat many moons ago. 

I swear there was something going on with Con Stewart when they were in the New House with us, although I didn't realise at all at the time. Well to add to that, when they visited recently, one of the continuity directors (a woman I happen to know is just like you two...) was VERY smitten with her while they were visiting, and I would swear that they disappeared off together together far more often than I might expect for such a short acquaintance ...

That is most strictly between us, Hilary Burns, obviously, as I don't want to go spreading rumours (even though I suppose that I am!), but I think it's worth testing the ground with Bill first, you never know. If the school DID come out here and you two could come too it would be fantastic. There's plenty of room here - I totally overestimated how much space I would need, and am already thinking to make the chalet into two flats. How about you and Nancy take one, supposedly to help me keep the place occupied when I am away? Then you would be edging right onto the school grounds and could commute...

I'm jumping right ahead here, sorry, I ought to stop. There's no official school or school grounds yet, and you might not want to move here with it anyway. But - if you did, it would be wonderful. I've missed having friends around, and it wouldn't be as if we'd be sharing the house, I'm making it two very separate parts. I had planned on offering it to someone like Nell Wilson, but she is now going to be down at Welsen with the finishing branch - that bit at least I know is definite, and you will have been told about, I'm sure.

Let me know how things go on, and if you have any advice about how to arrange a safe meeting with Phil Graves. If Jack was in the country I would ask him to come with me, but he and Rosalie are still in Canada, worse luck !

Lots of love and good luck for getting a job wishes,

Joey

\--------

Joey, you are a godsend.

It never occurred to me that they might be looking for a second PT mistress. It makes absolute sense, after all they have senior and junior Maths, Geography, English etc. I went to Hilda and she welcomed me back with open arms ! Apparently Peggy Burnett has been doing her best, but they've all been quite worried about the strain it is putting on her. So you are talking to the new Head of Games of the Chalet School ! I worried that Peggy might not take kindly to it, but she nearly prostrated herself at my feet in gratitude for coming back, and we are working very well together.

It was a good idea to talk to Bill too. She thinks that there is a good chance that in the event of a move Pam Slater would chose to stay in the UK, as she isn't keen on the language situation at all. So she has promised to make sure Nancy would be the first to know, and if that works out then we would most certainly want to take you up on the idea of the flat together. It would give us a good cover, as everyone knows that we are all good friends, it would hide us far better than if Nancy and I were to live either in school or in a nearby chalet of our own. We get away with it now as I was apparently staying with her till I decided what I wanted to do, people have just assumed we were saving money. It's not great being apart during the week and half the weekend, but it does give us a bit more protection from gossip. 

I have a possible suggestion for the Phil situation. I will be taking a group of girls out to Bosherton Lily Pools for half term, as they have nowhere to go during the half term break. Why not tag along, arrange your meeting for then, and keep reasonably near to us? I honestly think you will be fine - Phil seemed almost his normal self when we met him, just a little less confident, which is to be expected.

I'm sure everyone at the school would be thrilled to see you for a few days, and it's an easy trip to Bosherton from here. Nancy is planning to 'accidentally' run into us on the day, so it wouldn't just be me and whoever comes to help me supervise the girls. Nancy is very strong now, certainly as strong as Phil looks, so she could be your Knightess (Knightie?) in shining armour if needs be. As I say though, I honestly don't think you will have a problem. He is desperate to make amends and let you know he is sorry for disappearing off the map, that is all.

With love,

Hilary.

Aka Miss Burns,

Aka Head Of Physical Education Department, The Chalet School

(Me ! Head of dept!)

(Yes, so there's only two of us but STILL! Head of my own Department!)

Huh! Nancy has just looked over my shoulder and said I should call it "Big-Head" of my own department ! Cheek! She is now annoyed with me for putting that in, she thinks you will think she isn't pleased for me. She is, she is over the moon with the way everything seems to be working out. Thank you for your help, you have made things much easier to work out. Fingers crossed it will soon be Switzerland here we come !

\---

Jack meanwhile had come to his decision. He arranged a meeting with Jem while he was over in the UK, and wouldn't hear anything of the arguments for his family coming back rather than him leaving.

"It may only need to be a sabbatical," he said, although he doubted it. He'd seen the improvement in the girls and Rosalie, and he thought a good couple of years in crisp mountain air would make a lot of difference. He would be starting at a much lower level in Canada, for he needed to make his name over there, but that couldn't be helped.

Jem wasn't to be put off. Jack was one of the best, if not the best, in his team. He didn't want to lose him, and aside from that, Jack and Rosalie had become close friends over the years, and he didn't want to lose them on a personal level either.

"Why so far away? There are perfectly good mountains here in Europe. Austria; Switzerland; France? In fact ... we've been talking about starting a finishing branch of the school in the Bernese Oberland - You've heard, I'm sure, about Joey wanting to buy a new home there. The difference in her is remarkable, you'd think she was ten years younger."

This plan was news to Jack, and he listened intently as Jem described the area and ideas for a possible branch of the school out there.

"It's to be only older girls to begin with. Nell Wilson is to head it, and we were going to look for a secretary for there as part of the staff. What about Rosalie going with them? Then you wouldn't be commuting so far, and the girls would get all the fresh mountain air you could want."

He could see that Jack was wavering, and decided that he had to play his final card now, for he didn't want to lose the bright young man, and he honestly felt as though the Maynards were part of his own family.

"We can't go back to Austria anytime soon, but a lot of our best work was done in the Alps. I've been thinking for some time about trying to establish something there. If the girls and Rosalie were safe with Nell in the Oberland, you could scout out the right sort of place, see what you think of the suggestions Joey has made. You'd be Head of course..."

Jack was sorely tempted. He'd enjoyed visiting Canada, but there really weren't any specific ties to staying there, this could be a real solution. And... Head... of his own San... able to move forward on treatments without having to discuss endlessly with the older board members. Jem himself was supportive and forward thinking, but so many of the others were afraid to try anything new, sure that the new treatments and medications would do more harm than good. If he was honest, he knew why, and it sickened him. 

Some of the new treatments might well eradicate TB in the developed world. Make them as TB specialists in effect redundant, and Jack knew that there were some older doctors that were struggling with the possibility of this happening before they retired. To hold it back was futile and self serving. Jack wanted to cure TB, then on a practical level he suggested widening the specialities available in the San, change the model to one of recovery and recuperation from a lot of diseases, rather than specifically TB. 

This was part of his problem with working in the original San, for the board members wouldn't hear of it, and actively blocked some more advanced treatments. Jack struggled not to show his distaste that any doctor would even consider risking one potential life lost for their own comfort and livelihood, and it had made him occasionally unpopular with others at the original San.

He had to discuss it with Rosalie, but he knew that she was worried about the complete isolation of staying across the Atlantic. She had mentioned missing the Alps more than once, so he suspected there wouldn't be a big problem there. After all, if they decided not to start a Swiss San, they could always go back to Canada later, and in the meantime it would be far more possible for him to commute between England and Switzerland than to Canada.

The girls spoke French well already, and they were quick to pick up any new languages at this age, so the languages wouldn't be too much of a problem. They would take no harm from being taught at home for a while, and he was sure that he could find a good school for them there once things were more settled.

Nell was thrilled to have Rosalie as secretary again, and quickly enough a solution came up for a governess. When they went to visit Switzerland, they met up with Biddy O'Ryan, who was staying with Jo while deciding what she wanted to do next. Hilda had already made the suggestion to Rosalie in a letter that she should ask Biddy. They would have jumped at the chance to employ her for the school, but couldn't. They had had no one to cover for history when Mary Burnett had left, so had taken on a mistress and could hardly ask the woman to leave. It was a real pity, as Biddy would have been ideal for the role, and fitted in well with the existing staff.

"Hold on to her, do, if you can" Miss Annersley had written. "If, as we suspect, some of the school will move to Switzerland or Austria soon, we will need a History mistress, for this young girl is most determinedly not triligual! She claimed of course on her references to be fluent, but my dear - her accent ! I'm fairly sure that she sets test on most German days as well, which won't do in the long term. Of course I know full well that other staff do that, but it matters less in Maths I feel, numbers are numbers..."

Rosalie laughed, and replied that she would do her best. She hadn't had that much to do with Biddy O'Ryan until now, but the younger woman got on well with the girls, and with "Aunty Nell" lending a hand on scientific subjects the Triplets began to storm ahead in their lessons. They were pleased to be nearer to their extended family, and visits from the Bettanys and Russells became a frequent event, especially when a new home for the San was found just a little higher up the mountain.

\---

Joey fidgeted, unable to keep still. She looked out of the window of the train at the fields flying past, and tried not to think too much. She was going to visit an old friend, that was all. 

She crumpled and smoothed out her chocolate wrapper, before systematically tearing it into small squares, barely registering what she was doing as she arranged the pieces into patterns, swept them together and rearranged them again.

She'd written possible letters to Phil a few times, but in the end she always tore them up and started again. The more she tried to write her feelings down, the more convinced she was that it all really needed to be done at a personal meeting. She just couldn't get the right words; The ever present knowledge that any words she wrote could end up in the papers one day made her too wary to express herself properly. So she wrote to Phil to suggest meeting in Bosherton, timing it with Hilary's trip for safety. Having done that, she filled other letters with light topics, nothing too complicated.

She had felt quite calm about the idea initially, pleased that she would get a chance finally to see him in person. Now the time had come, she felt excited and nervous, as though she was going to meet a pen pal or childhood friend for the first time. Would he be as she remembered ? Would his illness have changed him totally, made him unrecognisable? Jack and Hilary separately warned her that he was now quite thin, still struggling to eat normal sized meals after the prisoner's rations and his long illness on returning home.

She wasn't sure quite how to handle things, and decided in the end that she just had to see where their conversation led them. If she thought that Phil could deal with talking about their shared past, she would do so, but otherwise she was now very good at small talk. 

She just wanted more than anything, to see him, to know for herself that it really was true, he really had survived. Damaged, changed or not, he was still the person she compared all others to, and she missed him as a friend, even after all these years. Only with Phil had she felt as though a man's interest really was in her, and her alone, not her fame. Not that other men had been any different to him really, she was sure. It probably was the timing - with Phil she knew that it couldn't be her fame, as he'd known her when she was just starting out.

She gazed out of the window again, barely seeing the coast as it crept into view and then out again in the distance. Was she wanting to see Phil for the man himself, or was she reminiscing, wanting to return to a simpler time, to her youth? 

The media seemed to have decided to take against her again, seeing her move to Switzerland a proof that her loyalties had always been to the continent rather than her home country. She was getting tired of always being portrayed as unpatriotic, when she'd risked her livelihood, and even sometimes her life, with her undercover work. There was a great temptation to have her agent 'leak' some of the real facts, give herself a defence, but Joey knew it wasn't right, she shouldn't bring herself down to their level. She had signed the Official Secrets Act, but even if she hadn't, she knew that telling the truth might put others in danger. Not just on her own side, but those she had fooled into letting out more information than they otherwise would have. She had become almost friends with some of them, for she knew that many of them were simply trying to support their own country, and had been unaware of quite what had been going on.

One good thing about her current situation was that her move to Switzerland had been publicised so heavily that people weren't expecting to see her in the UK. She had taken precautions with her appearance, and been able to get through to Cardiff without being recognised, and only a few people had approached her there. Now it was just the last stretch to Carnbach, where she was staying overnight with Nancy before meeting Hilary and the school trip at Bosherton.

\---

On the platform, Nancy paced restlessly, watching along the tracks as if she could force the train to appear. Joey was to stay with her overnight, and she was looking forward to catching up with her, and hearing all about the new plans. However it had been some years since she had spent much time with Joey, for their visits to Armishire had rarely coincided. Nancy had loyally gone to a few of her films, and then become totally hooked on "Joey Wilson", and religiously watched them all, although she would never have admitted it to anyone. 

Now that the moment of meeting had finally come, she was intensely nervous, as though she was meeting someone totally new. Would Joey be the same 'Hail fellow well met' person? Would she be used to rich surroundings, fans and attention? Would they have anything at all to talk about ?

Nancy had always been cautious with money, but her salary had never been huge, and was even less as a maths mistress. Her flat really was little more than a room with a kitchen and small living area, and Nancy would never have suggested Joey stay with her if Hilary hadn't merrily promised the option before consulting her. However Hilary had been so proud of her plan to help Phil and Joey meet again, and clearly worried that Nancy was lonely now that Hilary was back working and living at the chalet. 

Easy going Nancy hadn't the heart to object to the plan. Now however, she privately cursed her partner for submitting her too this ordeal, not least the frantic cleaning and tidying that she had been doing for the past week to feel happy to have such a famous visitor in her home.

The fact was that one of Nancy's deepest secrets was an early schoolgirl crush on the charismatic Joey Bettany, which had only deepened after Joey becoming a film actress. When Nancy watched Joey on screen, it took her back to being a teenager, just starting to realise that others didn't feel this same connection to other girls, didn't treasure every casual word or shared joke. 

It didn't compare at all to the deep love, friendship and companionship that she and Hilary shared, but Nancy secretly knew that if she were single and Joey available, she would have leapt at the chance, and she was therefore both thrilled and petrified to have this visit, this one night with Joey alone.

Nancy adored Hilary, and she knew that Joey was one of her partner's closest friends. Their time living together in London had been short, and a long time ago, but had created a bond between them that survived to this day. So to Hilary the idea of sharing Joey's house in Switzerland seemed a marvellous one, and Nancy was hopeful that it would work. But that tiny secret part of her that had gone to Joey's every film, and avidly read fan magazines bought supposedly to 'show support' was now far too excited about this visit, and Nancy was scared. 

No one had ever come close to Hilary in real life, but now all of a sudden Nancy would wake from dreams with initial grin on her face, before sudden horror as she remembered just who they had been about. Normally fantasies about an actress were safe, were just daydreams. But this time, this person was a real one, and a very perceptive one at that. Nancy had no fear of actual infidelity, after all Joey was there to meet an old boyfriend, and they had spent many an evening all together before the war without Nancy being remotely reminded of any of the old crush feelings. She had only had eyes for Hilary, and Joey was nothing more than someone who knew about them and didn't seem to disapprove.

Without the dreams, and the unsettling realisation that she had mentally crossed a line by allowing herself a crush on an actress who was also a friend, Nancy would have been far less worried. However she had been woken by nightmares where Hilary found out and left her all week. Her biggest fear was that she couldn't hide the confusion and attraction, that Joey or Hilary would somehow realise, and her whole world would unravel. All for a school girl crush that wouldn't quite go away.

Finally, a whistle, and the train was here, the moment could be put off no longer. Nancy braced herself with a fixed smile and desperately hoped that her face didn't give any of her thoughts away. Joey was just Joey, nothing more, and never would be, and this was just two old school friends meeting to reminisce.

If she kept telling herself that, maybe it would become true.

\---  
Joey looked around the platform for a cheerful, plump 20 year old, only to stop and openly stare at the fit, sharp eyed woman in her thirties that approached her.

"Nancy Wilmot ! That CAN'T be you!" 

She blurted it out almost before realising how rude that could seem, for if pressed for the difference, it was hardly polite to be expressing how much older someone looked, or how your memory of them was of someone 'well covered', as the phrase goes. The years had been good to Nancy, and she had grown into her looks. So it wasn't that she had aged, so much as she was just not as young as Joey's last memory of her. 

Luckily for her Nancy was far too nervous to take the words as anything but a form of greeting, and grinned at her before taking her bag. Joey was taken by surprise, or she would never have let her friend carry for her, she frequently irritated her agent by refusing to hand bags over to others like servants, until she finally understood that it was an important part of her image, and that often the photographers would be there the moment she left a train or plane. 

They reached the end of the platform before she awoke to the fact that Nancy was struggling with her three bags and refused to take a step further until she had taken at least one from her. Nancy wouldn't hear of her taking them all, was unwilling to even give one up so Joey satisfied herself with taking the most awkward one back, almost by force in the end.

The polite squabble over, they made their way along the road, and Nancy shyly indicated towards a small, slightly battered car.

"It's a bit of a drive to Carnbach, so I'll apologise now for the rather bumpy ride" she said, as she stowed Joey's luggage and opened the drivers door, leaning across to open the passenger one. 

"It'll be fine," Joey reassured, seeing how nervous her friend was, and understanding all at once that it wasn't just Nancy who had changed. 

She herself was lightly made up now, and dressed in well cut clothes that had been purchased and tailored, not home made. She was used to cars, used to being driven, but most people were only just being able to afford one of their own, and there weren't many about on the roads in England even now compared to America. 

Spending time mainly in Switzerland or around film crews meant that she forgot the awe that people could show on first meeting a film star. She didn't feel herself to be a celebrity but the reactions of those outside the film world made her realise that somehow, somewhere in her career she had made that step, become something different, to be admired or watched from afar.

During the journey they chattered lightly about mutual acquaintances, and shared school and family gossip. Joey could tell that Nancy was tense, and was desperately thinking all the while of ways that she could show Nancy that she was still her, still a friend. She knew from her time with Hilary that Nancy was wary about public displays of affection even with a straight woman friend, for she knew that it could be easily misinterpreted, or worse bring unwanted attention onto them. So Joey's first plan of a chummy linked arm as they walked had been shelved. She hadn't really worked out a good way by the time they arrived, so decided to just leave it, hope that things settled down as they spent more time together. 

Nancy, for her part, was starting to relax slightly as they talked about familiar, safe topics. Joey seemed just like, well - Joey. She looked far more sophisticated, but still seemed to have barely aged. Nancy had to struggle to remember that she was in fact a couple of years older than Hilary.

This was one of the reasons that Joey had been so successful. She had an ageless quality that meant she could believably play the girl next door, while a small amount of make up could give her the extra years for a more mature role. Now it was completely confusing Nancy's senses. She knew that more than a decade had passed, but she had that heady confusion of an early crush. Despite the hundreds of miles and several years in between, it felt a little as if she were back in Tyrol, a responsibility and worry free pupil. That Nancy had been laid back, slightly lazy and happy go lucky.

For all that Nancy was terrified by the crush, to go back to that time was intoxicating, and while she drove, she couldn't help herself daydreaming that they were driving around the edge of the lake, on the way back to the school after a day out in the valley. Joey had fallen silent, taking in the scenery as they drove on towards Carnbach. Nancy drifted, mentally now heading up to the school (although she had never driven to the Chalet, somehow this didn't matter in the day dream). 

There they were, all the prefects waving at them, and there, there was Hilary. Nancy grinned to herself, seeing Hilary in her mind, waving madly and smiling. Somehow, as she always had, she stood out from the others, almost as if she were outlined in white all around her. Nancy had forgotten that, the way that every part of her just switched on, woke up to Hilary arriving. She'd always found that - even before the faintest chance of being together had occurred to her; Somehow Hilary's voice seemed to be filtered out from all others, her location in the room a constant presence on Nancy's inner compass.

Back in the present day, Joey made a sudden comment about the coastline they were passing along, and Nancy was shot back to reality, taking a moment to register where she was, who she was with, and even for a panicked moment to wonder whether she was driving on the right side of the road. She managed to mumble something in reply, and quickly point out another point of interest to Joey, to give her a few moments to recover herself, sure that her daydreams would be written all across her face.

It wasn't until much later that she replayed things in her mind and realised, just as in most of the dreams, her contact with Joey was actually quite innocent, and related to friendship, being noticed, being cared about by Joey. Being young and irresponsible, with no other people to think about but herself. Yet even in the middle of a dream about Joey, every sense awoke at the sight or sound of Hilary. The relief of realising this helped a lot with getting her feelings more under control. 

Nancy hadn't noticed while trying to get things organised to get through the war, and then to get a job near Hilary, but she'd ended up drifting away from contact with many old friends at all, and what she was really missing, really craving was close friendship, the knowledge that apart from Hilary, another person wanted to see her, wanted to talk to her, cared about her. The crush on Joey had allowed a daydream of same sex companionship that in a straight relationship would seem quite natural, but it worried Nancy none the less.

If she'd only known, Hilary had gone through a very similar thing with Mary Burnett only a few years before, but the distance with Nancy living in London had allowed her to work it through, get her defining lines between friendship and attraction clear in her mind. Nancy didn't have that completely yet, but she felt happier about living in Joey's house now, having met her again, and remembering how friendly she was, and how down to earth.

They parked up just in front of Nancy's home, and made their way in, Jo making almost dog like sniffing noises as she savoured the sea air, before realising just how she must look and dissolving into giggles. It was an infectious laugh, and Nancy couldn't help but join in. She almost forgot her nerves at Joey staying in her very tiny flat, but as they entered and she dropped the luggage in the centre of the little bedroom, she remembered, and frowned without realising it.

Joey the ever observent noticed the frown immediately, and wondered about the reason for it. She hadn't really noticed the size of the flat, for she's spent so much time in recent years in hotels and tiny city apartments, it seemed quite normal to her. One concern she had alone, which was that she had knocked Nancy out of her bed onto the very tiny sofa. She resolved to wait until nearer to bedtime, but was determined that either Nancy would let her sleep on the sofa or share the bed with her.

In this she was to have no luck, for Nancy would not be moved from her plan, and kept to it by the simple method of sitting on the sofa refusing to move until Joey went to bed. With some friends, Nancy would have shared, knowing that it could never, would never be misinterpreted. But with her recent dreams, and also the relatively recent loss of Hilary from her bed, she had no intention of taking any risks. It would be perfectly natural for her to sleepily turn over and out an arm round Hilary, but to do that with Joey would be too much to forget, and Nancy wasn't willing to allow the tiniest misinterpretation.

They chattered happily, and Nancy was relieved when Joey expressed an insatiable desire for fish and chips, having been out of the country for a while. Her cooking was not very adventurous, and she'd been torn between the options of admitting this and just keeping quiet while trying to scrape up an appropriate meal for a guest. Joey was always quick to read other people, and had taken in the limited cookery options in the galley kitchen. She also remembered days in the London flat as if they were yesterday, and Nancy cheerfully admitting that Hilary was the one who was good with cooking. That might have changed, but the happiness on Nancy's face when eating out was suggested told Joey that it probably hadn't.

Another polite spat occurred when Joey insisted on buying the food, but this one Nancy didn't win. Joey was determined, and rightly pointed out that Nancy had collected her from the station, the cost of their fish and chips was far less than a taxi would have been. They ate them looking out over the sea, Nancy pointing out the lights of St Brivials and the dark shapes of the other islands, two of which were nature reserves.

It wasn't until they were settled back in the flat, each with a drink in their hands, that the topic of Phil came up. Joey had been trying not to ask Nancy all the questions that popped into her head about how he looked, what he had said, but as they relaxed a bit more, she couldn't help herself. Nancy really couldn't tell her much, but she did her best. She could see from Joey's struggle to not ask too much how nervous she was, and how much Phil had meant to her.

Finally the evening was over and they made their way to bed, Nancy still determinedly refusing to share, and expressing herself quite comfortable where she was. Joey gave up and settled herself down to try to sleep, although rest seemed a better description, for she found herself staring at the ceiling, and running through every possible scenario for the meeting the following day. It seemed she would never doze off, and she wished she had remembered to bring her book in from the bag left in the living room

"Joey? Joey? Sorry to bother you, but it's time to get up."

A voice out of the darkness made Joey start awake, and realise that at some point in the early morning she must have drifted off thankfully. She hurried through her dressing, then calmed herself down and took a bit more time with her make up and hair. She wanted to give a good impression to Phil, and although she could do nothing about the bags under her eyes from the poor night, she could at least look clean and tidy. Nancy struggled not to stare, as she saw the transformation. Joey had no greater love for make up than she when a prefect, only ever using rouge to hide a toothache. However she had had to become aware of her appearance in her job, and now used the skills learnt from the make up artists to disguise the tiredness and nerves that still etched her face.

They nearly missed the little bus taking the girls and staff on the half term trip, and had to run the last few streets, racing up to the bus just as the driver got in an started the engine. They threw themselves onto the bus, laughing in relief to have made it without delaying the others, to be faced with a minibus full of shocked faces. Both looked at each other in confusion.

What was the matter? Why were they all looking at them like that?


	19. Chapter 19

"Well if you WILL launch yourselves on a bus before checking it's the right one, you get all you deserve" Hilary said in reply to Nancy's third expression of woe in the last half hour. "Especially if you turn up arm in arm with a fairly famous film star !"

Nancy gave a quick sideways look, but Hilary was clearly just teasing, and she grimaced at her, just stopping herself from sticking her tongue out. This remembering to be a model of behaviour whenever students were present was quite tiring sometimes, especially when trying to hide any sign of a relationship. The girls already had enough to chatter about, after seeing Nancy and Jo leap aboard a minibus going out from Carnbach Grammer for the day. 

Many students at the school boarded in the town, since the nearby hills and valleys were not always accessible enough for a daily commute. The two schools had managed to arrange slightly different term dates, so that transport links weren't too overwhelmed, but this fact had slipped Nancy's mind. She had recognised several of the girls from her own workplace, without registering that they were from the wrong school. Hence them leaping aboard the wrong minibus, giggling away like school girls themselves.

"It's all very well for you." Nancy returned to her grumbling. "The Chalet Girls all know about Joey and don't tend to be half as addicted to films anyway. I'll spend half of my lessons next term trying to fend off questions about my film star friend. Please Miss, how d'you know her, were you an actress too, Miss..."

Joey sat quietly behind them, grinning slightly as Hilary showed absolutely no sympathy. It was a strange feeling though, to realise that her fame was now such that it affected those around her. The girls on the minibus had been shocked by their Maths mistress launching herself onto the bus with Joey Wilson, but had then taken barely any time to dig out autograph books, bits of paper and even photos of the star to be signed. Joey had seen no way out of the situation but to agree, and they'd held up the Chalet bus a good five minutes before escaping red faced onto it.

Peggy Burnett's reaction had been another shock. Joey had remembered the girl from her schooldays and as the younger sister of her own friend Mary. However Joey's absence for so many years had meant that Peggy really hadn't much of a memory of her. It was very strange to have not only the girls slightly star struck, but Peggy quite tongue tied and hesitant around her. She hoped that by the end of the trip the ice would have been broken, but it illustrated to her how things had changed since she had last been actively involved with the school. Once there would have been no old girl that Joey didn't know well, but now even someone like Peggy Burnett was shy with her.

Joey didn't want to be too involved with the school - she couldn't, she was too busy - but she hadn't wanted to be completely apart, from the staff at least. She made a resolution to herself to go and visit the staff and school before she went back to Switzerland. In the meantime, she put her efforts into getting to know Peggy and the girls who were on the trip with them. Most of them were thankfully too young to have much of an idea who she was, and assumed her to be another teacher. Only Carola Johnstone, a slightly older girl, had much idea, and she was too awestruck to do more than give Joey fairly monosyllabic answers to her friendly questions. 

Joey gave up for a while and looked out of the window, trying to work out just what she wanted out of this meeting with Phil. She couldn't help wondered whether he would have changed too much for them to really be friends again, or whether he would be another one too star struck to really have a sensible conversation with.

\---

Over in in Bosherton, Phil was having to take every preparation for the meeting a step at a time, otherwise he would have frozen and been totally unable to get ready. Get up, get washed and dressed. Eat. Don't think about later today, just think about the morning paper, give Ruff a brush and make sure that he smelled reasonable. The dog, that was, although he hoped that he did too. 

Ruff had grown into a huge strong dog, with one bad habit. He was absolutely addicted to rolling in fox poo, the smellier the better. Phil couldn't count the number of times that he had been seeing a patient in the little surgery at the bottom of the house, only to know that Ruff had arrived home from a walk simply by the smell wafting even through closed doors.

Thankfully Helen, with some idea of the nerves that her brother must be feeling, had made a conscious effort to keep Ruff indoors that day, so no 'Eau de Fox-doo' perfume could be applied before the planned walk. Phil had been adamant that he wanted to take the dog with him, partly as a possible escape route and excuse if he couldn't cope with meeting for long. 

He also wondered whether Ruff would remember his rescuer, or whether Joey would remember him at all. It had been a big part of his recovery, being able to spend time with Ruff, and he had been incredibly grateful to his sisters for having kept the dog and trained him so well.

Finally, with a lot of gentle prompting and help from his sisters, Phil was ready. He looked at himself nervously in the hall mirror. He looked an awful lot better than he had a few years ago, but he knew that he was still underweight, and paler than he ought to be. He did his best, knowing the risks he had when not getting enough nutrients, but ever since his time in the POW camp, he struggled to manage to eat much at all, let alone a balanced meal. He would occasionally get cravings for a food and over eat that, but most of the time he found it hard to manage more than a few mouthfuls. His doctor told him it was common with people in his situation, and that he would get back to normal eventually. He had made great strides in the past few months, and as his mind returned to it's normal state, the eating issues would follow. Phil had to hope that it was true, for he hated being relatively weak, unable to help his sisters with tasks he used to do without a second thought.

Deciding that he looked presentable, he opened the door and strode out, determined to get himself moving, get there before he changed his mind. He had worked out the timing so that he could get to the lily pools well before Joey, walk around a bit and get calmer. Also that gave time to exercise some of the energy out of Ruff, so that he would behave properly, and hopefully sit patiently if Joey wanted to sit down anywhere while they talked. He was generally a well behaved dog, so Phil hoped that he wouldn't be too boisterous. Still, it was safer to get the energy out of him beforehand, to make calmness that little bit more likely.

He had done ten circuits of the pools with Ruff before the little party hove into sight. The plan had been for Joey to meet him slightly apart from where the girls would be looking at the lily pools, so Phil made his way to the planned meeting place and stood there, trying not to let his rising panic win. His hand was slippery and felt as though the lead would slip through his fingers at the slightest movement from Ruff. He compensated by gripping far too hard, and later would find a band of red skin across his palm, which made him think of school for some reason. It took a while to realise that it was just like a cane mark, something that Phil had rarely had himself, but had seen on friends plenty of times.

For now, he didn't even feel the pain of the gripped leather, or notice Ruff looking up at him in confusion. The tension of his owner's body was obvious, and the dog wasn't sure quite what the problem was, or whether he could help. He did the only thing he could think of, which was to lean against Phil's leg and put his paw heavily on Phil's foot. So it was that Joey's first view of Phil was swearing, hopping on one foot in reaction, and then frantically cleaning the muddy paw print off the front of the shoe. She grinned to herself, but slowed her pace, then backup up quickly, so that he wouldn't know she had seen him like that. 

Once he was back on two feet and calmer again, she continued on, feeling strangely like she was moving in slow motion. All sorts of details jumped into her view, and she found herself noticing things she'd completely forgotten. He tapped one hand on his leg as he stood there, and she had a vivid memory of teasing him about passing morse code messages to his socks. One of those nonsensical jokes that became a part of their private language as a couple. 

Would he remember things like that? She felt a sudden sense of loss. Here she was going to meet the person she had connected with most in her life, who knew her inside out - better than she had herself at the time. Yet she didn't know if the person conjured in her brain when she saw Phil was there at all any more. Did he remember their jokes, their shared moments? Did he remember how much they had cared for each other, those early fumbling moments where they discovered each other physically, the pain of separating, getting back together for occasional nights after that when he was enlisted? Would he be another person just star struck and shy? Would she be ending the visit with a friend or a false smile and autograph?

\---

She took a hold on herself and told herself not to cross bridges before she came to them. If Phil just needed to meet her and know that their relationship had been a real one, if he couldn't remember all those things about being together that were so very precious to her, then that was the way it was. She had been given a second chance to talk to him, to maybe explain, apologise for the break up. Very few of those who got the news of loss in the war had that option, she shouldn't undermine it by wanting more. And maybe, just maybe, he might remember everything, might be wanting to tell her he had moved on, have baggage of his own he wanted to share.

Phil heard her footsteps and looked up, barely able to believe that the moment was finally here. There she was, his Joey, really there and if anything more beautiful with age.

He wouldn't work out what it was until later, but the younger Joey had had a slight edge to her movements, a sense of urgency in everything, as if her energy had no outlet. She had been driven, occasionally self centred and also impossibly naive in some ways. Now, this decade or so later, she had a calmness to her; The strength of features and vividness that was her very signature seemed gentler. And her posture was better, her movements smooth. Every gesture seemed intentional, unlike the occasionally gawky and clumsy girl he had known. He couldn't quite define what had changed, but she seemed somehow much more in control, more sure of herself.

He felt his throat close slightly, and almost stuttered in his greeting, before taking a moment, calming himself. He wasn't the same person either; How could he have expected her to be unchanged, merely because her pictures in the paper barely varied year to year. He hadn't really expected the change to be for the better however, for her to have aged into a much gentler, much less intense person. 

It was a while before he realised that the feeling of familiarity was still there, that this composed, articulate woman was in fact even more like his deeper memories, more connected to him than even he had realised. She was somehow more like the essential Joey that he'd known in his dreams than the superficial Joey he'd built up in memory, and that threw him into a whirl. He had prepared himself for her to be less perfect than his memory, had even expected it, assumed that she would be arrogant and selfish, as so many actresses were meant to be.

What he hadn't banked on was the fact that age and experience had rubbed the sharper edges smooth, had knocked back childish arrogance and insensitivity. The woman who chattered away to him and asked about his family, fussed Ruff and exclaimed at the dog's size was like a beam of sunshine to him, warming and soothing sometimes while occasionally confusing and dazzling. He found himself stuck for what to say, for how to react, and could tell that he had relapsed to almost monosyllabic answers, much as he wanted to talk freely, affectionately, the way that she was herself.

Joey was shocked, despite all the warnings, at how thin he was, and how much he'd aged, although he still had a face that many would class as handsome. If you hadn't known his true age, you would think him a man that had weathered well, it was only knowing that he wasn't so many years older than herself that made the deep grooves of worry in his forehead noticeable, and the slightly grainy quality to his skin. She could tell that he had been very ill, physically as well, as mentally, and berated herself for not pushing more and sooner to see him. 

It was an amazing thing that he had done, bringing himself back from the edge of oblivion, and managing not only to cope with daily life, but also be safe enough to return to his work. It said a lot for his determination and strength of character, and she felt a wave of shame that she hadn't realised just how much he had been through. It had been easier to run from the situation, to accept him not wanting contact, but now she saw only missed years together with her friend, and ways perhaps she could have helped.

They wandered along the pathway, haltingly exchanging news and discussing the weather, the Lilies. Anything but their past history together. Somehow neither felt quite able to make that first move, share a memory of their time as lovers. The memories were too precious, neither of them quite felt that they could cope with the risk of the other one damaging them by contradiction, or not remembering. Ruff looked from one to the other, confused by the body language of this pair. They seemed to be drawn to each other, then realise, move apart. He shook his head, humans were strange. They made too much noise, didn't look at body language or smell each others signals enough.

Noticing that Phil was tiring, Joey suggested a stop at a nearby bench, using jet lag as an excuse, although the distance from Switzerland wasn't really enough to make much difference. Ruff was happy enough to sit beside them, leaning in against Phil's legs, then licking Joey's hand as it dangled nearby. She smiled, and absentmindedly stroked the dog, feeling the familiar pang of loss for Rufus. Her lifestyle really didn't work with a pet, so she had never replaced the great St Bernard, hard as that had been at times when she saw a fluffy puppy, all eyes and big paws.

"He's done well" she said to Phil, pointing towards Ruff. "I couldn't believe it when you said that it really was the same puppy as the one we rescued. He seems almost like a puppy himself, although he must be at least 10."

Phil smiled and ruffled the top of the dog's head, earning a flick of the nose and lick on the hand in return.

"He's a godsend. Been better than any therapy, walking him and being pulled around by him."

Joey understood. There was something about the way that dogs sensed hurt and did what they could to help. Ruff seemed a very balanced dog, and she was glad that he had been helpful for Phil in his recovery.

"I'm glad your sisters kept him, looked after him so well" she replied, still absently brushing her fingers through the dog's coat. "I wonder whether he has any memory of me, knows who I am ?"

Privately Phil thought it unlikely. Joey really hadn't spent enough time with Ruff to have formed much of a memory, but no one knew for sure how dogs thought about such things. He knew that the dog had been slightly wary around him to begin with after his return, but had quickly realised that this man suddenly living in the cottage wasn't a threat, was in fact in need of help. 

Still, there was no sense in upsetting Joey so he made agreeing noises and changed the subject. Ruff's rescue was too tied up in his mind with Joey's rejection, and he didn't want that memory just now. He knew that the afternoon would have to end, that he had no real tie to this woman any more, but for just this moment it was nice to daydream, to imagine putting his arm around the back of her as they sat there, of her head dropping onto his shoulder.

Joey could see the Chalet party wandering along a causeway to look at the lilies, and noticed little Signa kicking her heels against the stone as she sat and looked at the water. She had a stick and was using it to pull weed up to look at it. Joey frowned. She'd be in in a minute if someone didn't grab hold of her. She shifted in her seat, focused on the girl and wondering whether she should go back over there. She grinned as Nancy said something to the girl next to her and swopped seats, grabbing hold of Signa's hand, pointing something out with her other hand to distract the girl from the fact that she was being held firmly and kept under control. Trust Nancy to notice. She had always been good with the younger girls, and would make a good mother when...

Joey frowned, realising that for Nancy there probably would be no 'when she had children'. She and Hilary seemed very good together, and she envied them the comfortable companionship and friendship they had, but it saddened her to think that they wouldn't have a choice whether and when to have children. She realised that as she had been thinking she'd stopped talking, and Phil was also silent. However somehow it didn't feel like a problem, and another old memory came back. Phil and she had always been able to be quiet together. People always said that it was important to be able to talk to someone, but although Joey agreed, she had come to value people that she could also be completely quiet with. She had a mad moment where she nearly rested her head on his shoulder, before remembering that they weren't together any more, and a lot of time had passed since that sort of action would have been acceptable.

She knew that there were things that she wanted to talk to him about, but somehow she sensed that it had been enough for that day, that she needed to be patient, build up to things carefully. The Chalet party had packed up their food and were starting back along the causeway, Signa's hand still gripped firmly in Nancy's, and Hilary was looking at her watch and clearly wondering where Joey was. Joey realised guiltily that she had wandered out of sight, which wasn't part of the plan.

She leapt up, and explained to Phil that she needed to go now, but shyly suggested meeting again later in the week. He agreed, and checked that she had his phone number, wishing even as he did it that he was more confident, could suggest that she stay and he drop her back to Carnbach later. However he knew he was getting tired, and that made social events hard. If he took her back home there would be the inevitable meeting with his sisters, and he didn't know if he could keep it together long enough to then safely drive her back.

She didn't want to leave, this had been such a nice gentle afternoon. She looked at him, seeing past the thin and slightly fragile body to the vital man she had known. Hilary was now looking very worried, so Joey knew she had to go. At the last moment she hugged him impulsively and then stepped back as if worried that she had passed a boundary that she shouldn't have. He looked shocked, but was smiling, and she was glad she had done it. Not sure what else to say she grinned and him, then set off, back towards the lily pools and the others, looking no older than a teenager as she ran.

Phil's journey home would take him in the opposite direction, but he couldn't quite bring himself to go yet, wanting to see Joey up until the very last moment, in case she didn't contact him. He decided that Ruff looked like he needed another spin around the pools, and started to follow along, an appropriate distance behind Joey, trying hard to look as though he was just going the same direction. He was afraid however that it would be a strange, intense thing to do, so with a sigh he changed direction, confusing Ruff completely, and headed off for home.

Joey waved towards Hilary as she ran, and her friend's relief was evident on her face. They needed to get the girls back to school soon, as Signa at least was starting to look very tired with all the excitement and fresh air. If her friend didn't reappear soon, she'd need to leave the girls with Nancy and Peggy and go to look for Joey, so to see her speeding towards them with an apologetic wave avoided that worry. Hilary started herding the girls back to the minibus. Nancy waved with the hand that wasn't firmly keeping Signa under control and followed Hilary and Peggy off towards the car park.

Joey felt better than she had for years. Even if she and Phil could never be a couple again, she felt sure that she had her friend back, which was worth a huge amount to her. She felt light and happy, and excited to think about telephoning him, arranging to meet up again.

As she ran, she noticed the great lily pads and made a split second decision to have a quick look. She hadn't really noticed the pools much before, being too nervous about the impending meeting. She ran along the causeway, planning on a brief look then running on to catch the others at the minibus. She felt so good, and as if everything was coming together beautifully, as if meant to be.

The slippery weed that Signa had pulled up blended in among the causeway cobbles, and Joey didn't see it at all. She didn't sense the loss of friction, the movement of her leg in an unintended direction and the loss of balance. All she knew was a careening fall, a pain in her head as she hit the causeway, then the cold bite of the water as she fell into the pool, face first. Everything went black, and she knew nothing more.

\---

Later, when people asked why she had been hanging behind, Carola couldn't really give an answer. It seemed so childish to say that she had wanted to walk near to Joey, maybe even try to exchange a couple of words with her. She had seen a lot more American films than many of the girls at the school, since her Aunt was fond of the cinema and Carola often went with her when they were travelling. She had been a fan of the actress even before joining the school, often envying the characters Joey played, who tended to start off in less enjoyable circumstances, and find their way out of them through a combination of cheek, strength and good luck.

So when the others had hurried off to the minibus, she had been unable to resist holding back a little, sneaking looks behind as the actress had run towards them. Joey Wilson looked very happy, and Carola wondered why. The path taken by Jo and Phil had been deliberately chosen to keep hidden from the others, so she had no idea that the woman had been meeting anyone. She simply looked as though she was happy to be alive, and had been wandering in the gardens by herself. Carola was therefore the only one among the chalet party to see Joey run out onto the causeway, and smiled to see the joy in her face as she looked at the lilies.

When Joey slipped, Carola barely had time to think, she just ran, yelling for the others as she went. She launched herself into the pool, and did the only thing she could do, which was try to get the woman's head above water, and wait for help. The water was freezing cold, and Carola wasn't really strong enough to do more than raise the cold lifeless face as far as she could, and hope that she didn't get pulled down under the dead weight herself.

Hilary and Nancy had nearly reached the bus when the cry came. It was Peggy Burnett who turned, and saw to her extreme confusion, Carola Johnson yelling and running towards the water, before jumping in for no apparent reason. Peggy swore and sped towards the pool, convinced the girl had taken leave of her senses. As soon as she got near enough however, she went white and launched herself in beside the girl, adding much needed support to Carola and managing to get Joey that little bit above the water. Even so, the pair were struggling to get the unconscious woman any further than the edge of the causeway, and the cold was starting to affect them both. With an eye to her charge, Peggy was about to tell Carola to let go and get herself out of the water when help arrived from an unexpected quarter.

A wet hairy face leant out over the little group, and Ruff grabbed Joey by the shoulder of her coat, adding an extra bit of strength and height, allowing them to lever Joey's body out onto the side, and then pull themselves out. Carola was nearly at the end of her tether, and as she reached the edge she briefly lost consciousness and started to slip back in. Voicing some choice expletives that a sailor wouldn't have scorned, Peggy had to make the terrible decision to let go of the precariously balanced Joey, and hope that she wouldn't fall back in, in order to grab the girl. She knew that if it came to a choice between the two, Carola was a child, was in her charge, and must be put before an adult every time. Thankfully Ruff was not letting go any time soon, and Phil was barely a moment behind him, cursing the fact that his fitness had deteriorated so much that he was wheezing from the exertion. He pulled Joey more firmly onto the causeway, and then helped Peggy lift Carola out of the water.

All of this felt at the time as if it was happening in slow motion, but in reality it had been barely 3 minutes. Hilary had only just been alerted to the situation, and was having to hold back the other girls from running to help. With a shout to Hilary and the older girls to get the rugs from the van, Nancy pelted over the pools, to help Peggy out of the water, and try to wake Carola. Phil meantime only had eyes for Joey, and was gabbling pleas for her to be alive, all the while checking her pulse, looking for injuries and checking her airway. He did all that he could, then with a wrench he tore himself away and checked the girl. Never had his personal and professional instincts struggled more against each other. He wanted to grab Joey up, and get her to safety, but the girl had to be checked, and the other mistress, and he knew that they might need emergency care just as much as Joey. Thankfully Hilary had arrived by now, and being trained in first aid she had quickly roused Carola and checked her reactions, before wrapping her and Peggy in the rugs from the van. She felt sick to see Joey lying there, still, grey and to all appearances dead, but she had to focus on the living. She waited as Phil confirmed that the girl and her junior mistress were safe, and then herded them all back to the van. Phil told her to get them all to his house, and she wanted them to be well away from the scene if Joey didn't wake up, really was as far beyond help as she seemed.

Happy that Hilary seemed to be taking care of everything, Phil turned his attention back to Joey. She hadn't moved, and for a heart stopping moment he thought it was all over. He cursed his choice to have started walking in the opposite direction, if he had been close behind Joey he could have got to her that little faster. He wouldn't have known anything was wrong at all if it hadn't been for Ruff pulling his lead out of his hand and hurtling towards the pool. There wasn't time now though for regrets, he had to do all he could to help Joey if at all possible.

He quickly decided that he was better to carry Jo to his house than try to take her in the bus with the girls in this state. He put his shoulder down and tried to lift her, only to nearly scream out loud in frustration. In this state he just couldn't get her more than halfway over into a fireman's lift. He would never manage to carry her, he would have to call one of the mistresses back and get her to the bus. He felt tears smart hot and painful against his lids as he tried again, but his body just wouldn't respond. Then all of a sudden the load lightened, and he opened his eyes again, looking directly into Nancy's.

"Where to?" Was all she said, as she shifted Joey up and over her shoulder. She had spent much of the past few years building up her strength, revelling in her new found fitness, and she was able to take her friend's weight with ease. She felt for Phil, this must be hard for him, but the priority was Joey and getting her to safety. Thankfully Phil wasn't at all concerned with anything other than the need to get Joey in the warm. He could have hugged Nancy for coming to the rescue, and it was only her precious cargo that stopped him. He showed her the way, running ahead to warn his sisters. He was coughing so much when he arrived that it took a few minutes before they could understand him, but they sprung into action as soon as they understood. A fire was started in as many bedrooms as possible, and water boiled for hot baths. When Nancy arrived with Joey Helen Graves was ready to take charge.

"In here with him my lad" she said, bustling ahead and missing Nancy's brief grin at the familiar mistake. She was too worried about Joey to smile for long however, and she followed the woman into the room, obeying her when dismissed outside while Helen removed Joey's wet clothing. Nancy knew that to insist on helping and the likely embarrassment of Helen realising her mistake and apologising it would just waste valuable minutes. Helen knew what she was doing, and with the help of her younger sister swiftly got Joey into a hot bath, dried and into a warmed bed.

In the meantime, Phil had directed the others to the other bath and to places to change, glad to see that Hilary had had the sense to get Carola out of her wet clothes and wrapped in rugs before setting off to the house. Peggy Burnett had been kept warm by the drama and urgency of the situation, and hadn't realised she was still in her wet clothes until reaching the house and being ordered into a hot bath. She suddenly realised just how clammy and shivery she felt, and obeyed without question, almost collapsing as she finally reached the warm dry sheets of the bed.

It became obvious quite quickly that Peggy and Joey would have to be left, for both were still unconscious but thankfully Carola seemed none the worse for her dip now, and the other girls needed to be taken home. Hilary had been very unsure about leaving anyone, but the Graves were all medically trained, and they knew what they were doing. She left, with promises to return as soon as she could, and Nancy helped her get the girls all the way back to the school, into Matron's care. Once the girls had all been settled with hot milk or a sleeping draught, Matey came to find the pair. None of the other staff were back yet, and she found them in the empty staff room, Hilary having finally given way and cried herself to sleep in Nancy's arms.

Matey entered the room, and Nancy tensed, realising that they were risking exposure, but very few things had ever got past Matey, and she was not at all surprised. She made a quick decision, and knew that a sleeping draught would do neither woman any good, whereas being close would do much more. She herself was trying not to abandon her post and rush to Joey's side. Despite the years since she had seen much of Joey, the girl would always be the closest thing to a child that she had, and to hear that she still hadn't roused before they left was hardly cheering news. She knew that she was needed here however, so had to trust that Joey was being taken care of and look to her more nearby charges. She saw Hilary raise her head, blink a few times and then blush and look horrified as she realised where she was.

"I've had the fire started in Nell's room" Matey said, knowing that her friend would be the first to offer if she had been there. "There's a double there, just make sure that as far as anyone knows, Nancy stayed in a spare room. No, don't try to speak, just get yourselves to bed."

Grateful beyond measure, Hilary and Nancy went off to the warmed room, and fell asleep holding each other close. As Matey had known, it was the best medicine for either of them and they woke bright eyed and ready for the day. On telephoning the Graves, they were glad to hear that Peggy at least seemed well and would be able to return to work the following day, merely resting as a precaution after all of the excitement. Joey had roused briefly, but had slipped back into unconsciousness almost immediately, so she was still in critical condition. Hilary made arrangements to visit the following day and went to tell Matron and Nancy what she had been told.

Helen Graves put the telephone receiver down and went back upstairs. She wasn't worried about the young Miss Burnett, she was hardy enough to be likely to escape with only a cold. Joey was harder to judge, but she again seemed reasonably fit and well, and hopefully wouldn't suffer too many after effects.

What Helen hadn't told Hilary was that Phil had stayed in his wet clothes until everyone was checked and safe in the warm. He had suddenly started to shake the night before, and was now in bed, looking in almost as poor a shape as Joey. They had managed to get a doctor over from a neighbouring village, but although he had looked over Joey and Peggy carefully, he had dismissed Phil's condition as nervous collapse and barely checked his chest and pulse. Helen knew her brother, and this wasn't like any of his issues with breakdowns, he seemed mentally fit right up until his collapse. She was monitoring him closely and had contacted a different doctor, one who knew Phil in person, not by reputation as an ex POW.

Her instincts were correct. Joey began to rouse the following day, and luckily for her she had only a bad cold and some of her customary chest issues. However when the other doctor arrived, he was extremely concerned about Phil, returning several times over the next few days.

"There's no way this is nervous collapse," he said in exasperation. "That is just assumption and lazy thinking. Phil's symptoms are all clearly physical. I'm sorry Helen, but I think he need to go to hospital or a Sanatorium. I'll make the arrangements."

He had spoken just outside the door of the room that Joey was staying in, both of them forgetting that she didn't know how serious Phil's condition was. She jumped straight out of bed and joined them, starting a coughing fit that didn't subside for some time, but managing eventually to get through to them that she had contacts at the Sanatorium in the hills. The doctor nodded.

"Russell's a good man, I'd agree that he couldn't have better care than there. If you can contact your brother in law, I will get Phil ready for transport. He has to go somewhere, that much is evident."

Jem came to visit and agreed that Phil needed to be admitted. He didn't say anything to Joey, for it was obvious to everyone around her that she cared deeply for this man, whoever he was. Jem was concerned that she felt guilty for putting Phil at risk, and didn't want her to make any rash decisions. After all she barely knew the man really, as far as Jem could tell. The time in wet clothes had only been the trigger. There had clearly been something badly wrong for some time. The weakness from his years of near starvation and eating issues since had given him no physical resilience, and there was serious concern that he just didn't have the strength to pull through. Only time would tell whether he would make it.

\---

"Miss Wilson?"

Joey blinked, and looked at the messenger blankly, before registering that the girl meant her, and was waiting for a response. 

Not for the first time she regretted choosing a surname that matched someone she knew. Most of the time she knew from the context that it was her, not Nell but every now and again she lost concentration and didn't respond. It rarely happened in America, but being back in the Alps kept throwing her back to her schooldays, and she was missing messages all over the place. She was almost been tempted to ask the crew to call her by her own name rather than her professional one. She usually preferred not to, feeling the name differences helped her keep her work and personal life more distinctly apart.

It didn't help that she was nearly asleep on her feet; The journeys back and forth to visit Phil in Wales were starting to take a real toll on her, and the last one had been a particularly difficult one. Storm damage to the tracks near Paris meant a long diversion, and so she arrived only minutes before she was due on set. She just about managed to stay awake during her session with the make up artist, however it was hard, as the woman took twice as long as normal; Without admitting it, she was struggling to make the exhausted looking Joey similar enough to the previously filmed scene.

Finally she was on set, only to have to be called back for hair restyling as she unconsciously ran her hand through her hair and disturbed it too much. This delay had been followed by fluffed lines and memory lapses, which were very unlike Joey, who was normally famed for only needing a few takes. The unfortunate result of being normally very efficient was that far less time was allocated per scene, so delay was a costly business. The final straw had been tripping over a fragile prop, causing the whole area to need resetting and sending the continuity experts into a spin.

Joey brought herself properly out of the day dream to attention, and nodded when the girl told her the director wanted to see her. She knew what this would be about, had been expecting it after her past few weeks of unreliability. This director wasn't famed for his patience at the best of times. On top of the fact that they'd never worked together before, he had a preconceived idea about actors and actresses, and no idea about her normally high level of professionalism. It was galling after years of being praised for her commitment and skill, to be treated like an unreliable novice. She listened quietly as he skirted around the issue, then told her he'd rearranged the schedule to give her a day off, and he strongly recommended that she spent the next 2 days resting and revising her lines. Joey bit back the sharp retort she was tempted to give when he began implying she was getting too old for a partying lifestyle and recommended a quieter life, not city hopping all the time. She couldn't expect him to understand, after all he didn't really know her, or her situation, and her constantly disappearing off to England every time there was a gap in her shooting schedule must look strange given that she lived nearby now.

Not for the first time, she wished that she was officially connected to Phil in some way. If it wasn't for the fact that she knew only too well how persistent journalists could be, and that she didn't know this director or production company that well, she would have trusted him with the information. However she wasn't ready to take the risk that people might turn up at the San looking for a story. Any disturbance might hinder Phil's recovery, and she wasn't taking any chance of him or his family being disturbed while gossips looked for a story.

So she had to listen to the 'advice', smile sweetly and apologise without telling the director where to take his patronising attitude, or breaking down and admitting the true reason for her travelling. She suspected that even if he knew of her 'friend', he wouldn't understand this drive to be there every spare moment that she could. She didn't really understand it herself, having lived so many years without any contact with Phil, she ought to be able to step back more, prioritise her career the way she always had in the past. 

The fact was that she barely slept when she was away from Phil, woke from nightmares where she was rushing through hospital halls, was too late, had lost him again. She knew it was irrational, but that didn't stop the nightmares, or her constant sense of worry.

In fact his health seemed relatively good, if Joey could just get herself to believe the improvements she'd been seeing recently. He'd been under the care of the San for a few months, been built up gradually with a better diet and the right medication. However his visiting time was still strictly controlled. She was shy about interfering with his family time, so she could only sneak moments with him when she was nearby, never quite long enough to feel confident in his recovery. Jem had prescribed some very strong medication initially, to allow Phil absolute rest until the chest issues could be addressed, and this did make him groggy and slightly confused at times.

However irrational it was, she was always afraid to leave it to 'another day', sure that next time she would arrive too late. Even now, after a visit where Phil was awake, aware and even occasionally joking and smiling, she was scared of every phone call from England. Her exhaustion made her unable to think rationally about things, and she was deeply afraid that the promising messages overheard from the doctors at the San were overly optimistic.

Despite her being a relative of Jem's he wouldn't talk to her about Phil, said he couldn't without Phil's permission, and Joey was just not ready to risk asking Phil whether she could be notified as if family. Apart from not knowing if he was strong enough to have the conversation, she didn't feel that she could cope if he said no, didn't want or couldn't cope with even a close friend relationship. She didn't quite know when it had happened, but she realised that she was rapidly falling back in love with him, despite trying her hardest to only see him as a friend.

She bit back the retort that the director didn't have any idea what he was talking about, and simply took the chance for a rest, glad to be filming in Switzerland so that a 2 day break could be spent actually at home, in her own bed, rather than an impersonal trailer or hotel room. She had been going back to England from the set so much that she'd barely been up to her home on the Platz at all.

She fell asleep almost as soon as she entered the train. In fact she very nearly missed the station, for the mountain trains rarely stayed long at any of the stops. Thankfully the person next to her was getting out on the Gornetz Platz too, and their bustling and getting ready woke her just in time.

She knew Gillian had telephoned ahead and probably arranged for transport to her home, but had been too tired to pay much attention to the plans. So it wasn't until she rushed off the train, and stood checking that she had all of her bags with her that she realised that quite a welcoming committee was standing near the station platform. Unbeknownst to her, Gillian had been so worried about her that she had finally telephoned and confided in Rosalie, who had determined that Joey wasn't going to go to rest at her house straight away, but would come back to theirs and be fed a decent meal, and if possible, given a basic check over by Jack. Gillian had confided that Joey was tending to miss meals, or sleep for days when breaks did come, and Rosalie wasn't going to miss this opportunity to check what was going on with her friend.

Jack himself couldn't take the time off to meet the train, as he was kept hugely busy by the new San, but besides Rosalie, Jo saw all three of the triplets, tanned and happy-looking, although slightly shy and hiding a little behind their mother. Next to them was Nell Wilson, again looking healthy and contented. The new environment obviously suited them all well, and Joey felt her spirits lift just having stepped off the train and being up in the crisp mountain air.

Nell's keen eyes had noted Joeys appearance, and privately determined to contact Gillian as soon as possible and see whether Joey's agent could arrange for more time off. The girl looked like she was one strong breeze away from collapse. Although at over 30, Nell supposed she shouldn't really consider Jo a girl anymore, to Nell she always would be, especially as she looked barely in her 20s even as exhausted as she was. Nell pursed her lips, determined that whatever was going on, Joey wasn't going to be allowed to run herself ragged like this. Rosalie hadn't felt that she should confide in Nell about Joey and Phil, so the older woman was in the dark about how Joey had got into this state. However she wasn't going to let Joey leave the Platz until she had some idea that she would be able to cope.

For now, all she did was take Joey's case, and point her towards a slightly battered looking minibus.

"Hop in" she said, stowing the bag inside and getting behind the wheel.

Joey smiled as she looked at the bus and saw the words "The Chalet School" on the side. Many of the final arrangements had been made while she was in England or on the set of her film, so she hadn't registered that term must have just started. She began to ask how it was going, but the noise of the rough road drowned her out, so she had to wait until they had reached her home. 

Rosalie left the Triplets with their 'Aunty Nell' and marched Joey in to freshen up and get changed from her travel clothes, refusing to take any argument about her coming straight over with them for the evening. Joey was so tired that she really wanted nothing more than to sleep, but she knew Rosalie rarely did anything like this without good reason, so after a few good natured grumbles she washed and changed, then they joined the others in the minibus. Thankfully the road between her home and Rosalie and Jack's one was much smoother, so she was able to ask some questions about the new San and Finishing School.

"It seems to be going well." Nell replied, over her shoulder. "We have a real mix of girls, only about half are from the Chalet School, but they seem to be shaking down together well as a group. As you can see, we've moved up from Welsen, it's just too hot there in the summer. Temporary premises for the moment, since we need a bit more space in the long term than the current place provides."

Joey did know about this decision and she thought it a good one. She was glad that she had made her own choice to live up on the mountain, even if it did mean a slightly longer journey time. She had now been in many countries with hot weather, but the type of heat that occurred on the lower shelves was a very tiring one, and she felt better already for the crisper air up here. Nell seemed a bit brighter and happier too, as did Rosalie, so it was a sensible move.

"Only time will tell of course, but I think it will work well. Madge seems happy enough to give the final go ahead for the rest of the school to have the option of a Swiss branch, I believe the location is the only question now." Rosalie said. "I'm quite hopeful she will chose this Platz, if they can get past the stall in negotiations about the resort buildings."

"We could go there, if it did" piped Margot suddenly, looking hopeful. "You said we could, if they came up."

Rosalie smiled at Joey before answering what was clearly an established routine. 

"We'll have to see, Margot. Aunty Hilda isn't sure whether she will accept people as young as you three, so you might need to continue with Biddy and Aunty Nell. I'm making no promises. Unless your work improves a lot you wouldn't be ready in time anyway, young lady."

Margot looked put out, but wasn't squashed for long, soon asking Joey about her filming, and expressing her own desire to be an actress, or maybe a trapeze artist. Joey's face at the second option must have been a picture, as Rosalie spluttered slightly and explained that they had been to a circus relatively recently and Margot had been greatly taken with the acrobats.

"This is one reason for the great excitement about school," she said while the girls were distracted. "Margot has got the idea into her head that the school will have a gym with a trapeze in it. DON'T ask me where she got that notion from! But if wanting to go to school gets this little monkey to pay a little more attention to her lessons, I'm not going to argue too much!"

Joey laughed and made a mental note to ask some of the stunt people and dancers that she knew to come to visit her at some stage. They would be sure to be able to show Margot some form of acrobatics or balances, which would entertain all of the girls.

-


	20. Chapter 20

Joey was so happy to be home and spending time with her friends and the triplets that she almost forgot her tiredness. It wasn't until after the evening meal that she felt the weight of the past few weeks with little rest land upon her. Jack had been watching her carefully, and saw the early warning signs. As she began to pale and frown with her incoming headache, he made his decision. He checked with Rosalie that a spare room had been prepared as planned, and then told Joey in no uncertain tones that she was to spend the night with them, and go back to her own home only when he was happy she was well enough to do so.

Joey wanted to argue, but he was right that she really didn't feel up to getting her own house and bed prepared. Since she was so seldom home at the moment and help in Switzerland was very expensive, the house was left empty and rarely aired unless she was coming back. She knew she would have to work out a better system eventually, since it had felt slightly musty and stale when she had nipped in earlier to change. For all her desire to use her own home, being in a warm bed with clean fresh sheets and Rosalie and Anna fussing around her was far more relaxing this one time.

She fell asleep almost as soon as she lay on the bed, and had the first dreamless night she had had for some months. They left her to have her sleep out until late morning, and then insisted on her having her meals in bed and staying to rest. Joey had to smile when the triplets appeared very seriously trying not to disturb her or drop any of the breakfast in bed that Anna had made. They clearly wanted to stay with her as she ate, but Rosalie shooed them out with a good natured reminder that Biddy would be waiting for them back in the schoolroom. Joey bit back the laughter that came from seeing Len and Margot's identical looks of dismay, as they had obviously been hoping for at least a morning off from lessons to look after their exciting visitor.

Con was just as disappointed not to be spending time with Joey, but she loved history, especially with the way that Biddy made it come alive. So while her sisters pleaded with Rosalie that they were needed to help, she gave a shy smile and waved to Joey, then went off happily enough. Len and Con followed her in short order, Rosalie taking no notice of Joey saying that she really didn't need to be kept that quiet. Having had such large gaps in her time with the girls, she was always tempted to grab every second. Rosalie wasn't to be moved however, and as soon as the tray had been removed, Joey was left to rest, and found herself rapidly slipping into a doze, and almost before she knew it she was deeply asleep.

Jack came back from the San early, arriving in mid afternoon, and took a quick look at the patient before leaving her to have her sleep out. He wasn't at all happy about the idea of Joey returning to work the following day, and had conferred with Nell after that lady's conversation with Gillian. Joey's assistant was quite clear that she thought her employer near to collapse, but that her agent was having no luck in negotiating a reduced schedule. 

The film company only had the feedback of the director, and unfortunately he had presented it as Joey not showing full commitment to the project. Gillian was quite obviously relieved that someone else was involved, since she had been quite frightened at the level of exhaustion Joey had reached. She was a capable girl, but as they all knew, Joey was not someone who was easy to manage if she was determined on a course of action.

Jack knew that he needed to know the full story. His family's move and the starting of the new San had meant that he had no real idea of how things were going with Phil, and he suspected that Joey's imagination running wild was a big part of the problem. He told Rosalie to let him know when Joey was awake and ready for a chat, and went into his office to telephone Jem.

"Evening Jem, hope all is going well there?" He started and listened to a brief commentary on the state of affairs at the original San before starting on the main reason for his call. "How is Graves doing, any progress?"

"He's had a lucky escape, seems to be recovering normally now." Jem replied. "Most of the problems were nutritional, and the difficulty with rebuilding his health after his experiences. Thankfully the worst seems to have been avoided. He'll need to make some changes though, he can't live somewhere as damp as he has been."

Jack was glad to hear it. Over the years he had become quite close to Phil, and apart from the situation with Joey, he wanted his friend to be able to live as normal a life as possible. He had floated the idea with Jem about employing Phil at the new San, but Jem had been very anti the idea, so Jack had been quite concerned about his friend's long term prognosis. He didn't know why Jem was so negative about Phil, since the man was a good doctor, whatever his struggles in the past, but that was a conversation for another day.

He chatted with Jem a little longer, then explained a little of the situation and asked whether Joey knew that all worry for Phil was at an end. Jem was silent for some time, then said guardedly that he couldn't know what Phil had told her, but he had to respect Phil's confidentiality, and hoped that Jack would do the same. Jack frowned, there was something more here than patient protection, he was sure.

"Is that Phil's wishes? Or that of his family?" He asked, since he couldn't help Joey if Phil didn't want her involved. Jem's silence stretched even longer this time before he replied.

"No... They haven't specified anything, but I can't do anything about Jo knowing more unless they do. I've tried to tell her to stop visiting so much, it can't be good for either of them..."

Jack was puzzled. He could tell that the issue seemed to be stemming from Jem, clearly he didn't want Joey to be getting so close to Phil, but why?

"I don't know all the details your end, obviously, but given their history together, I'd have thought that it would be the best thing for them both, could be very good for them. Is there something I don't know, Jem?"

Jack was met with another of those infuriating silences. What was going on here?

"Look Maynard, I know that the man is your friend, but I'd have thought that you would see he has to move on from this fantasy about an actress, especially one with Joey's sensitive nature. Yes, he seems stable enough now, but this is the sort of thing that can end badly. He has this fantasy about a friend of a friend, now he suddenly actually meets the actress, rescues her in fact, and she's appearing in his hospital room all the time. It can't be good, and I'm afraid for Joey's safety..."

Jack nearly let out a whistle of surprise. Jem didn't know about Joey and Phil, thought the man was a fan, a stalker perhaps. No wonder he'd been limiting Joey's visiting time and not been encouraging her to be in contact with him.

"Look here Russell, have you had any extra information other than Grave's notes? I don't want to be passing on gossip, but I think that you need some information. The notes might well say that it was a fantasy, that's even what Phil himself believed in the past, but really it isn't. Jo and he were together, happily together from sounds of it, came close to marrying in fact ..."

Jack spoke for a while more, finally signing off with a promise from Jem to let Joey have a bit more time with Phil next time she visited, since he wasn't really on such limited visiting hours as Joey had thought. Jem was just, with the limited information that he had, trying to protect Joey, and also his patient, but his efforts had made a complicated situation much harder for Jo to deal with. 

Jack suspected that the reluctance to consider Phil for working at the new San stemmed from the same desire to protect Joey from the man, which did make sense - for both Phil and Joey. Jack was still unsure whether it would be a good thing or a bad one, and until he talked to both his friends he wouldn't really know whether they would welcome it or not.

Almost as soon as Jack finished the phone conversation, Rosalie poked her head around the door to say that the patient was awake and decent. He thanked her with a smile and a passing kiss on the cheek as he headed up to talk to Jo. As soon as he entered the room he could see she had a far better colour than the day before, although still very pale and all eyes.

"Well how are you feeling, Miss Josephine Wilson? Does our establishment warrant a film star four star review ?"

Joey grinned, and looked around as if deciding, before allocating it not four but five stars. Jack only ever mentioned her fame when teasing her, and it helped, as it told her that he didn't really think her anything like the stereotype of a film star. The thought was quickly followed by the contrast the attitude of her current director, and she frowned involuntarily.

Jack noticed but didn't comment, keeping things light as he checked her pulse and general signs. Once finished, he sat back and looked at her. She seemed well enough, it was just the exhaustion from her journeys. He had a difficult conversation ahead of him, as he needed to get Joey to stop worrying, without passing on any information that ought to be kept confidential.

"So what have you been doing, to get into a state like this?" he said lightly, deciding this was the best way to start the conversation. She didn't know that Gillian had already told Nell all about her trips, and for her assistant's sake he didn't want to admit that he knew. Apart from Gillian's worries about confidentiality, it would be much better to hear about it from Joey herself.

"I'm not in a state really, it's just been a busy time..." Joey began, then took in his calm but sceptical expression and accepted that he knew her too well to try to shrug things off as just a busy time on the film set.

She was repeating known facts, but Jack just let her explain in her own words, how she had been trekking backwards and forwards, grabbing moments here and there, but not really getting time to properly know how Phil was, or how he felt about her visiting. Thankfully she had no idea about Jem limiting the visiting for her rather than for everyone, and Jack had no intention of letting her know that fact if possible. He did feel that he needed to put her mind at rest however, since she was clearly convinced that Phil was very seriously ill, rather than recovering but still in need of rehabilitation.

Finally, after a lot of skirting around the topic, she admitted to the nightmares and panic that Phil might die when she was away, and he found an opening.

"Jo, you know I can't talk to you about Phil's condition, any more than Jem can. But I CAN tell you now that your imagination is getting away with you. I'll say no more, but trust me. You and Phil are my friends, and I want the best for both of you, so I'm telling you that much, in strict confidence."

Joey said nothing, but he noticed a slight relaxation of her shoulders, and suspected that he'd managed to relieve at least some of her worries. Now he had to float his own idea, and see whether she reacted positively or not.

"I'd been wondering about him coming to the San out here, but how would you feel about that, would it be too awkward for you if he didn't feel the same as you?"

Jo brightened. "That would be wonderful, do you think it's possible? Would Jem consider the transfer? I wouldn't want to risk his recovery, but maybe... do you think Phil would do well here, recover better?"

He realised at once that she was misunderstanding him, not thinking of Phil coming out as a doctor, but as a patient. He didn't correct her, as he'd already potentially been quite indiscrete. He realised just how little she knew, for Phil looked likely to be fit enough to be back at work fairly soon. He wasn't sure how to continue, but luckily she was totally distracted by the plan. She was clearly thinking it through, and it was obviously a very appealing plan to her. However even as he waited to hear what she had to say, she remembered something, and her face fell.

"I don't think he would do it. His sisters live near to the other San, and he shouldn't be so far away from them, not unless he would do better up here...although I believe his younger sister has left home, still we are only just getting to know each other again, and I'll be away...I can't ask him to move here..."

Jack let Joey work it out, happy that she seemed to be being realistic, and looking at all angles of the situation. He needed to talk to Phil, and there was no guarantee that the plan would be sensible, or possible.

Her mentioning Phil's sister helped him, since it actually solved a problem he'd been wrestling with in recent weeks. The matron taken on to help begin the San had decided that the mountain life wasn't for her, leaving him with a major staff role to fill. He knew Helen Graves from his visits to Phil, and also from her reputation in the area, and if she would consider it, she would be an ideal candidate for the Matron. In fact even if Phil wouldn't or couldn't come, he decided that he would ask Helen to consider them, she was ideal for the job.

Jack steered the conversation onto other topics, feeling that he could do no more until he had spoken to Phil. He saw that Joey's eyes were drooping shut again, and suggested she have another sleep, and then some food would be sent up for her. Joey made a slight murmur of either assent or dissent, and he slipped out, joining Rosalie downstairs. He wanted to run his ideas past her before he went any further, since she might have suggestions or see things differently to him. He respected his wife's opinion, and knew that she would think deeply about things before giving him any sort of answer. Also, Joey would be away a lot, and they might be Phil's only friends on the Platz, might even need to help him get settled if his sister didn't decide to come too.

Jack was keen on the plan, for he could see how well suited Phil and Joey were, and he was hopeful that they might well end up back together. He sensed that Phil could be proud, and would not cope well with the idea of a job being offered because of Joey and not his own skills. Jack truely wanted him on his team if possible, and he was a good judge of human nature. 

If Joey and Phil both lived separately on the Platz for a while, they had far more chance of building a lasting relationship or friendship, which would be much better than any disruption caused by rushing into anything. However if it didn't work, it could make for a difficult atmosphere, and he wanted his wife's view before he went any further. After all, Joey was like an aunt to their children already, now Phil would probably become very close too. Jack was fairly sure that this was a good plan, but he was engineering something here that might change their own family life, and he needed to be sure that it wasn't too much change too soon.

Rosalie listened quietly. She was a little unsure, not knowing Phil quite as well as Jack, mainly having the rather hectic weekend visit as a frame of reference, but she trusted his judgement. She could see that if Joey had the chance to get back together with Phil, she would probably jump at it, and she was worried that the drama of her rescue and his illness might cloud their thoughts. She made the suggestion that he ask Helen to come out as Matron, with the recommendation that Phil come too to cement his recovery. If Phil seemed to be happy and stable, then the discussion about working at the San himself could be had, and would be a separate thing from his sister's appointment as Matron. Jack saw the sense of this route, and this was what he decided to do, as long as Helen would consider the role as Matron.

\---

Thankfully Helen Graves was really keen on the idea, especially as Jem confirmed that some time in the mountains would be very good for Phil, so they rented a chalet on the Platz and came to join the others. It made a great difference for Phil, for it was a complete change of environment, and the improvement in his physical state helped cement his mental recovery far better than staying in their old house had done. There were no triggers here for those vague, undefinable memories from before the war, and he felt for the first time in many years that he could make a fresh start. 

He was really happy to accept when Jack asked him to join as a doctor. He had an extra perspective to give, having been a patient under suspicion of health issues, and was able to help them make the experience much less stressful for all concerned. On the rare occasions where he needed to take things a little easier, the mixture of jobs in the San meant that he could do so without it being an issue. This happened less and less, and he began to relax more and be able to see a possibility of a real future. It was a relief to be able to continue his career in something he believed in, have a chance like this to really make a difference but still have his sister and friends nearby.

Having Phil so much nearer, and without the hospital atmosphere of the San, Joey was able to relax far more about him, and able to visit far more easily and frequently. It was a slow thing, for both were very afraid to assume too much that they could ultimately have a relationship, and shy with each other in a way that they hadn't been before. However taking their time was the best thing for both of them, and they were able to rebuild their friendship first, rather than the pressure of distance pushing them to make commitments to each other. Joey was able finally to have some deep conversations with Phil about their past and the situation. 

With time their friendship deepened, as did his relationship with Jack and Rosalie, and with the Triplets. He loved spending time with them, particularly Con. Because he had been ill enough to struggle for breath, he understood and helped her to find ways to cope better with her breathing, and even feel more confident in her speech. He also knew all about sleepwalking due his own family history he was able to help her not feel so strange about it, and that release of worry helped her to control it far better.

Joey loved all of the triplets, but couldn't help but feel an added connection to Con. she also understood having chest problems and an imaginative nature. It was a wonderful surprise when on one of her visits home Con was able to rush up to her and chatter to her, talking nineteen to the dozen, and she marvelled at the difference in the girl. Con had suddenly decided to catch up with her sisters in height, and even looked like she might pass them soon. 

She was never going to be a great talker, her early years of struggling for breath would always make her happier to listen, or write something down as a story, but she was now able to join in with her sister's games and conversations in a far greater way than ever before. She would always have a risk of weakness, and have to take care, just as Robin and Joey herself needed to be aware of their limits on occasion. Joey was glad to hear from both Jack and Jem they felt the real worry was behind them, especially if she continued to live in the fresh mountain air for as many years as could be managed.

Joey almost bubbled with her happiness at so many threads of her life coming together, and having her loved ones so close to her. She realised that contentment and happiness made a huge difference to her writing, and found herself able to write with a freedom and depth that she hadn't known since her first days in New York. This was a good thing, for she was now being more discerning about her film role choices, and waiting for roles she really wanted to play. With her energetic nature, she needed to be doing something, and the months between film projects would have quickly led to boredom without her writing and settling into her new home.

Jem and Madge spent many hours looking at places for the school to go, before coming back to Jo's original suggestion of the old resort hotel next door to her. They had initially been looking at far smaller properties, for they expected to keep most of the school in England. Aside from those old enough for the finishing branch, they hadn't thought that many parents would want their girls to travel so far. However they had been overwhelmed by the positive response, and had to rapidly expand their plans. It helped perhaps that many of the girls had relations at the San or concerns about their health. The idea of a school, providing cosmopolitan education and with the sort of support that the Chalet School and San combination gave in health matters meant that nearly the whole middle and senior school was to move.

Warned by her rapid growth in Austria, Madge also purchased the large Pension next door.

"We could easily cut a gate in the hedge, then the prep and maybe the juniors could be there, and the school just across the garden" she chattered on happily. "There's a cabbage patch already, much of the rest of the garden could be used for food, so we continue being reasonably self sufficient. Karen will be in her element, being able to properly make continental dishes again..."

Joey looked at her, and wondered whether she had registered that Jem would be staying at the Welsh San. She was certainly talking as though she was planning to move herself.

However, Madge knew what she was doing. There had been a rapid increase in the requests for younger girls now that she was running an official prep, and while she had no intentions of stopping her own work, or moving away from her husband's San, she'd learnt the value of extra space to grow into rather than having to compromise or look for space later.

If the San was there then it wouldn't be long before families of the patients arrived, and the young doctors that Jack was recruiting would have children. The big house next to the school would be far too large for any one family, but if the Platz became more active then a hotel might try to buy it, and the expansion of the school would be out of the question. If the school didn't need the space, she knew that rooms could be rented to relatives of the patients, or even to staff. No, this time they were going to go for far larger space than they needed, and hope that the gamble paid off.

The move suited the Triplets and Rosalie well too, and they were able to get a nice chalet, almost on the doorstep of the San. This gave them a benefit of many more hours of Jack's time than otherwise would have been possible, for he was able to check on patients then be home a few minutes later. Rosalie was slightly sad to lose the cosy little situation at the finishing school, for Hilda had been correct in her assessment, and the new history mistress had not chosen to move from the UK. Biddy O'Ryan had happily joined the new school, fitting in as if she had never left. 

The Triplets had been getting too old really to have no other companions their own age. They formed the nucleus of the new Junior School, and others had swiftly followed. It was heartwarming to Madge to see how many of the school's continental "grandchildren" had been booked to join, at least on 2 weekly boarding basis, now that they were nearer again.

She'd been sorely tempted to join the new venture, but she knew that the school needed an English branch as well, and her prep was an important part of that. It had been a difficult decision, whether to keep any serious English branch going, but she and Jem had decided that it made a lot of sense to keep the association with the San, only bring the school back from the Island and Carnbach, where the weather wasn't ideal. Ernest Howell wanted to sell, and at a very reasonable price, When the renovation works for Plas Howell had finished, they moved the prep back in with the rest of the school, but with the majority of the current girls choosing to go to Switzerland the juniors soon out numbered the seniors. Madge wasn't worried about this however. As she said to the rest of the board when they looked at the plans for the school - Juniors become Seniors very quickly. Not all of the parents would want their children to go so far away, and not all of the girls would want to go either.

The two branches of the school were complementary to each other, but would by nature become slightly different in outlook. Being able to provide such good care for the young girls and boys in the small prep had reminded Madge of her original school. Her youngest was at the prep with her, and all the older ones were at the Swiss branch, so she had plenty of spare time. 

She threw herself into the English branch, determined that she would be involved now at every level. She had been responsible for so many young relatives in the original Chalet's early days that the school had become more Nell and Hilda's baby than hers. She was happy enough for that to continue out in Switzerland, but this English branch was hers and hers alone.

She put in two mistresses as joint headmistresses, Dollie Edwards and Ivy Norman, but no one was in any doubt as to whose school it was. Thankfully this suited the mistresses well, for they were nothing like as dominant personalities as Hilda and Nell. The three of them became a good team, amicable rivals with Nell and Hilda over in Switzerland, and providing a feeder school for the Swiss branch, helping both to grow.

\---

"Miss Wilson ?"

Joey looked up, confused to be called by her stage name in her own home, then her face cleared on seeing her new assistant. However many times she was corrected, she was clearly still a little starstruck, forgetting to call her Miss Bettany or Joey as requested.

Not for the first time, Joey regretted Gillian Culver leaving to work for the School. She didn't blame her - there really wasn't that much now for an assistant to do now that Joey was doing fewer films, so the post had become almost one of house sitter, with big periods alone while Joey was on location.

Even with the writing, Joey was an obsessive self editor, so there wasn't much to do. Gill had quickly tired of dealing with occasional paperwork and watering house plants. Eventually she ended up spending so much time over at the school helping out that she decided to make it official. It was a decision Joey understood, much as she missed Gill's calm efficiency and common sense.

"What is it, Margaret?" Joey asked, trying not to show too much irritation in her voice. The girl couldn't help not being as alert and sensible as Gill, after all.

"There's a man here to see you, he says he's a journalist !" The excitement was obvious in her voice, and she was almost hopping from foot to foot. "I told him you were writing and asked him to wait in the salon. Shall I arrange for some tea and cakes?"

Joey gritted her teeth and just stopped herself from asking Margaret just why she hadn't checked with her before telling the man that Joey was available. She didn't understand that members of the media were not always welcome guests.

Joey looked back at her manuscript, sighed and put the correcting pen down.

"Yes, as he knows that I'm here, please arrange for some food and drink, Margaret."

As she entered the salon, she thought for a moment that she recognised the man, but the name didn't seem familiar.

"Miss Wilson," he said, standing up politely as she walked across to him. "I appreciate you seeing me without an appointment."

Joey acknowledged the thanks, and looked at Margaret, wondering whether the girl would register that asking someone to make an appointment or wait would be more normal behaviour for an assistant. There was no sign of anything of the sort on the excited face, and Joey could tell that the drama of a real journalist visiting was far too much for her to take anything else into account. She would have to have a specific discussion with the girl, and get her to understand that this wasn't really an acceptable situation. She sighed inwardly and turned her attention back to her guest.

"I wanted to ask for your reaction to a story, Miss Wils...Bettany" The man began. "There are rumours, you see..."

"I'm sorry, Mr Brown. Excuse me just one moment." Joey interrupted.

She'd become quite accustomed now to dealing with the media. There had been countless rumours about herself over the years that she had had to either ignore or contradict. If Gill had been there, Joey would have been happy for Mr Brown to continue. However she suspected that Margaret she wasn't really suitable for the post of her assistant, and the girl was sure to take it personally.

She had seen far too many sensationalist stories sold about famous friends from disgruntled ex employees, and that had made her wary. Cornelia Flower had upset someone a few years ago, and suddenly the gossip papers had the person quoting all sorts of details. Corney joked that according to the media, she was everything from an invert who would never look at a man to the mother of a brood of illegitimate children. For all that she made light of the subject, Joey knew she now struggled to escape the rumours and finding work had been far harder since.

Even if she did decide to keep Margaret on, Joey wasn't ready to trust this girl yet, at least until she knew what sort of rumours they would be discussing. She asked Margaret politely to check that the tea was being sent from the kitchen and then go back to her work. There was always a pile of edited pages needing copying, so there would be a few hours of work, which would surely be much longer than was needed. 

This was another issue, Margaret tended to avoid tasks she considered less interesting, so Joey was never quite sure what pages had been completed at any time unless she had done them herself. A momentary flicker of disappointment and sulky irritation showed before Margaret remembered she wasn't a school girl any more, but an adult and employee. She obeyed, leaving the room as slowly as she dared.

Joey closed the door behind her and returned to the journalist. She braced herself for the latest rumour about her being a recluse, or having lost her voice. Even the old Nazi sympathy rumours might have resurfaced, that type of thing seemed to never disappear.

"So, where were we?" She asked, "You had some questions for me? Usually my press agent deals with these things, I'm not sure how much I can help you?"

"I appreciate that, I feel that it is something that needed a more personal touch, given the situation..."

Joey was doubtful that this was any more than an excuse to try to get a direct quote from her, but didn't challenge him. The sooner she found out what the story was and denied the rumours, the sooner she could return to her editing.

"It is a delicate subject, of course, especially at that time, so I'm not at all surprised that you've always kept your secret so well."

He was being irritatingly indirect, and Joey felt like he would never get to the point. She found her attention drifting, then was sharply brought back to reality as he went on. This wasn't one of the typical rumours. She had to concentrate, find out what he was talking about.

"I'm sorry, I don't understand, could you say that again?" She said, in a daze. She had heard the words 'illegitimate' and 'secret' but hadn't really registered what he was trying to ask her. None of this made any sense.

"The story, Miss Bettany, is that your book about a young unmarried mother has basis in your own life story, and I wanted to get your reaction to that."

Joey remembered Cornelia's situation and went into immediate panic, then pulled herself together.

"I'm afraid I can't help you. I don't know what you are insinuating, but I can assure you that the rumours have no foundation, you don't have a story here I'm afraid..."

Mr Brown frowned and gripped the edge of his hat nervously.

"I think we misunderstand each other, Miss Bettany." He said. "I'm not telling you about a story I might write. The story was published yesterday, and is in several other papers this morning ..."

Joey went white. She'd been so busy that she hadn't checked the papers recently at all. Gill had always made regular checks with the studio press officers, but Joey now wondered whether she had forgotten to suggest this to Margaret when she trained her to take over as Joey's assistant. In fact, she was to find out later that Gill had told the girl, but after several calls with no news, Margaret had forgotten to make it a regular habit.

The man handed her a copy of the story, and she took it with a shaking hand. A moment later, she spluttered and her shoulders lifted.

"Me ! Nell Wilson's daughter!" 

She was so relieved that there wasn't some rumour about her love life, drugs or countless illegitimate offspring that she couldn't help but splutter into incoherent giggles. Finally she remembered herself and her visitor. 

She expected him to be disappointed, but to her surprise he had a big smile on his face. As he grinned, she looked at him intently and tried to work out why he was so familiar. He spoke english fluently, but with the slight extra formality of someone not born to the language. His movements and general appearance were so very familiar, and the feeling niggled at her, the linking memory hiding just out of reach.

"I have to ask, Mr Brown, do I know you? You seem very familiar, but I really can't work out why?"

"We haven't met, Miss Bettany, but my Uncle will be pleased to know that you remember him. We are very much alike..."

Joey stared, wracking her brains for the answer, then before he could give more details, it hit her, and she interrupted him with a shout.

"Herr Braun! Is he your uncle ? Oh it must be! You look just like him!"

He nodded, clearly pleased that his uncle was remembered with such obvious pleasure.

"He is, and he always recalls you most fondly Miss Wils...Bettany. He goes to every one of your pictures, and always tells anyone sitting near him that he knew you when you were just a young girl."

Joey beamed with pleasure.

"We always wondered what happened to your family, oh Madge will be so pleased to know that he is still alive - at least I take it that he is from your description?"

He nodded. "Alive and well, and still at his hotel in the Tyrol. My father decided not to stay just before the war, taking the surname Brown when we moved. I have only a few memories of Tyrol myself, as I was fairly young when we left. In fact I think I do remember you, walking along with your red parasol."

"The Red Peril!"

"That would have been a most appropriate name for it! I was not often at the lakeside however, so you'll have to forgive me for not remembering much more."

"I'm thrilled to find that I'm remembered at all, Mr Brown, thank you. Did Herr Braun leave Austria during the war too?"

"My uncle had to stay, and so we had no idea for some time how he and the rest of the family was, but now they are all back in contact and ..."

Joey forgot herself, interrupting again in her excitement. "His family - Gretchen, is she well, does she live there too?"

He nodded, and began to tell her various bits of family gossip. It wasn't until they had been chattering for some time that Joey remembered the reason for his visit. She'd forgotten all about the ludicrous story for a moment, but now she had to try to contact Nell, let her know the potential onslaught to come. 

She made her excuses to Mr Brown, and apologised that she couldn't give him anything useful for his paper. He smiled and said that he was glad for it, he really only had very little interest in the story, but the opportunity to be able to meet her after all these years was too good to pass up when the assignment was offered.

"I am glad you are not upset by the story, it appeared to be a reliable source, but clearly not as much as the paper thought."

"Oh absolutely. They can't have done their research very carefully, I believe Nell is only about 11 or 12 years older than myself. Technically possible, maybe, but extremely unlikely that she would be my mother."

She showed him from the house and deliberated about what to do. Telephoning Nell would do little good, as she was sure to be in classes most of the day. Joey checked the clock and saw that it was nearing time for break, so decided to take a chance on finding Nell in the staff room. She wrapped herself up in her favourite cloak and set off across the playing fields to the school. In hindsight she would have been better to wait and phone. But as she said ruefully to Rosalie later, hindsight is an exact science, and she had no reason to expect a simple visit to cause so much upheaval


	21. Chapter 21

She arrived in the school and had to take a moment to orientate herself before heading in the direction she hoped the staff room to be. Joey was close to many of the people at the school, but rarely visited, inviting friends over to her home instead whenever she had enough of a gap in her schedule to entertain.

These events were called 'Joey's tea parties' in case any of the girls should overhear but instead were long evenings with good food, much laughter and often several bottles of wine. They were a relatively sensible bunch, and could all hold their drink well, but even so these nights had quickly become the stuff of staff legend.

So Joey had visited the school when it first opened and on a few occasions to watch the Triplets in a play or similar. This was partly her own choice, as she could be much more comfortable in a private setting, but also necessary from the school's side. Even though her major films were less frequent, she was still a household name, and the girls would rarely concentrate if she was known to be in the school. Hence Joey's decision to arrive just before break, giving her time to reach the staff room reasonably undetected.

She entered the room and settled herself in one of the comfy chairs overlooking the big window. There wasn't long to wait, and soon the staff were entering the room, chattering about their morning as they came. The first few were relatively new mistresses, and they stopped short at seeing a stranger, then realised who she was, and in the case of one young mistress went a deep shade of red in excitement. Joey was saved from awkward explanations by the next entry being Peggy Burnett, who exclaimed and welcomed her, pushing past the goggling newer mistresses to launch herself on Joey for a hug.

"Joey ! What brings you here ?" Peggy bubbled, clearly pleased to see her. The recent novel and filming commitments had kept Joey much busier and so there had been far fewer 'tea parties' recently. Joey grinned and returned the hug. She had a soft spot for Peggy, having seen her grow up from a cheeky junior to the responsible mistress she was today.

"What's the why of that, Peggy?" She said, as they settled into the comfy chairs again to await the rest of the staff. "I only live next door, why the welcome like a long lost adventurer?"

"Oh you may as well live in Timbucto, the amount we see you nowadays," was the retort. "And I can tell you, after an hour of trying to exercise the fidgets out of Lower IV b a fresh face and some possible excitement is hugely welcome!"

Joey grinned. "I'm glad to be of some use, but I'm afraid there's no real excitement...at least I hope not. I need to see Bill, d'you know where she might be?"

"With the Abbess in her salon probably" replied Rosalie, appearing suddenly behind the pair. "Joey, nice to see you, but to what do we owe this honour?"

"She refuses to say, we're obviously too low a collection of underlings to confide in" Peggy replied for her

Joey made a face at the youngster then made to rise and go to find Nell, but was stopped by the latest arrival. Matey, with her sixth sense where such things were concerned had made for the staff room shortly after break began, and she firmly pointed Jo back to her seat.

"Oh no you don't, my girl, the girls don't need any extra excitement at the moment. With the last few weeks cooped up they're like little powder kegs as it is. If you go out there now we'll never calm them down."

Joey started to object, but thankfully Rosalie had a solution.

"Nell has a free period after break, or rather she and Hilda aren't teaching but going over some of the applications for next term. You can go and find her then."

No one had yet dared to argue much with Matey, and Jo was no exception. She decided her news could wait, and settled down to hear the latest gossip from the school and ask Rosalie how the Triplets were doing.

"They're well and happy, real little schoolgirls now. Con was a bit upset last week, and I'm glad to see you, actually. I'd been meaning to call you anyway."

Joey was instantly alert, it was very unlike calm little Con to be upset.

"What happened?"

"Oh it isn't anything dramatic really. Con had a free afternoon and got permission to walk over to visit you, but your assistant sent her away. She was quite cutting from the sound of it, telling Con that you were far too busy to see schoolgirls. That doesn't sound like you, especially where the Triplets are concerned."

Joey's face turned thunderous, something very rarely seen, since she was a peaceful person most of the time.

"That dratted girl! There's very few things that would stop me seeing Con or any of the Triplets, you're quite right, I would always talk to them. Even if it was only to make sure it wasn't urgent and explain why I can't see them for longer. I didn't even get a message that Con or any girl had come over to visit. That's it, I've had enough, she'll have to go!"

Rosalie hadn't expected such a reaction, and looked at her friend before deciding that Joey must have other reasons for her annoyance. This was too public a place for such discussions, but she made a mental note to plan a visit to Joey soon to catch up with everything. The past few months had been so busy for all of them that time really had flown by without as much contact as normal. She knew that Gillian had been nervous about handing over to the relatively inexperienced young assistant, but Joey had been convinced that she needed someone quickly and she was the best of the choices available.

Gill had other ideas about whether Joey needed an assistant at all, and had confided in Rosalie that she'd hoped her move to the school might have kick started Phil and Joey moving on in their relationship, for it really was company and a person to stop nosy fans getting in the house that Joey needed now.

"They seem to keep skirting around the idea of being together, I know they wanted to take things slowly, but this is ridiculous!" Gill said, her frustration with the pair obvious. "Honestly, they are so clearly meant for each other, she lights up when he is around and he is, well almost talkative - for him!"

\---

Joey chattered with the staff happily enough, but she was glad when break ended and she could go to find Nell and Hilda. The time waiting had made her think a little more on what Mr Brown had said. There was some source for this story apparently that the journalists considered reliable, which suggested that it was someone known to be close to her. She couldn't think who would suggest such a silly thing, but couldn't quite dismiss it, since the newspapers mentioned weren't usually careless about sources for stories. They might not care whether the story was true or not, if it made good headlines, but usually were careful to have a quotable source as back up for any legal complaints.

It wasn't a nice feeling, wondering who it might be, wondering whether it was a deliberate attack, or someone who had been careless in their chatter. She even wondered whether this was another attempt by the secret service to get her to agree to continue with her work as an undercover agent. There had been a few requests for her to 'tour' some of the communist countries and use her knowledge of Russian to gather information, but Joey had been firm in her refusal. She had believed in the importance of the cause during her wartime spying days, but was much less sure about the current situation, ultimately called the Cold War. She had politely refused and made it clear that she was not available, and would not willingly start her espionage career again. She didn't trust the new agents that had approached her, and a little part of her was afraid this was a way to blackmail her into doing what they wanted. 

She told herself off for being paranoid and tried not to worry. Hopefully it was just a bit of careless gossip, incorrectly overheard. She had a reasonable level of hope that it wasn't the recruiting agent, since it wasn't the sort of story that would affect her career - if anything it would give her extra publicity and possibly sympathy. However she valued her peace and private life even more than her career now, and she knew it wouldn't be long before there would be reporters and photographers on the Platz, trying to get more out of the story.

This was where she had underestimated the speed and organisation of the modern media agencies. Already her rush across to the school had been captured on film, her cloak floating out behind her as she hurried, clearly intent upon something. Her looking around her apparently furtively before entering the school made another set of shots. Much more seriously, Peggy Burnett's leap into a hug had been done right before the staff room window, and a lucky photographer had snapped the exact moment. The young girl's face wasn't visible, but the enthusiasm of the embrace was clear.

There had been rumours about Joey's love life for years, since she showed no sign of marrying or even having male admirers at all. Phil and Joey had been so careful to be subtle in their courtship that only close friends knew of the potential romance and complicated history between them. The press attack on Cornelia had thrown any of her close friends into suspicion of also being 'inverts', and Joey had already had to deal with threatened headlines linking the pair of them. The only reason that story hadn't gone through to be printed was that an even more famous socialite was linked with Corney with much more evidence that the pair were in fact a couple.

Since Joey seemed likely to be in the school for some time, they took the opportunity to go to Joey's home. Telling the photographer to stay outside and take some background shots of the house while they could, the reporter tried first to engage the kitchen staff in conversation. They were all loyal, and too sensible to say much.

Margaret however was another story; Bored with her typing, irritated with being dismissed from the meeting with Mr Brown, she had been glad enough for distraction, and soon was chattering away, with no thought about the impact of her 'off the record' conversation at all. From this he learned that the lower part of the house was shared by a couple of school mistress friends of Joey's. 

This in itself would have been of little interest, but for the unfortunate coincidence of Nancy arriving home just as they left. She paid little attention beyond a polite nod to them as she passed along the garden to enter the lower flat. Nancy had kept to the fitness and healthy eating routine Hilary followed, and her curves were long a thing of the past. She regularly helped out with the sports teams and had long ago decided on a short hair cut, finding long hair a real pain when running around the field, even tied back. Wearing her hiking breeches, as she was now, she was clearly not a particularly feminine woman, and could nearly be mistaken for a young man at times. In the relaxed and relatively private area of the Platz, she had become careless, and forgotten the relative protection from suspicion that long hair and wearing skirts more had given her in the past.

Unnoticed, the photographer took several photos of her entering the house, and made sure that the angles were such that it looked as though it was all one premises. The little detail that the woman was Joey's tenant and neighbour, not living with her in her part of the house wasn't important. The detail of Joey clearly being embraced in front of a window by a young woman would fit in nicely, with careful cropping to make it seem as though the window might be part of this same house rather than over at the school. The truth didn't much concern these hacks, a story that they could sell was all they wanted. The past connection with Cornelia Flower. and these images were enough to build a gossip story on. The journalist and photographer gleefully sped away to find a buyer for their story, while Nancy, Hilary and Joey went about their lives with no warning of the problems to come.

\---

Back in the school, Joey was glad when she could finally make her way along to Hilda's flat. Madge had insisted on the Heads having a little more privacy than originally planned, and Hilda had a little suite of rooms connected to the office, with a small private garden just outside the windows of her salon.

Joey knocked, and entered at the "Herein", having a random urge to curtsey as she did so, despite leaving school before either woman had been Headmistress.

"Joey! To what do we owe this honour?" said Nell, a welcoming smile followed quickly by frown. "Nothing wrong, is there?"

"Peggy and Rosalie said just the same thing, I must make sure I visit the school more often!" Joey replied, giving both women a kiss on the cheek before settling into an offered chair.

"No thank you! Much as we want your company, the excitement it causes is most certainly not needed !"

"A charming welcome! Hilda surely she exaggerates?"

"Sorry Joey, but I agree with Nell, we'd far rather visit you at home than you come over here. We do love your company of course. But you know how silly teenage girls can be. We have enough problems as it is keeping the area of the playing fields next to your house out of bounds. You in the school too often would be a nightmare!"

Before Joey could respond fully Rosalie appeared saying that there was a call for Hilda. The headmistress made her excuses and went off to answer it.

Nell looked at her friend thoughtfully. Joey knew perfectly well that it wasn't helpful to visit in school hours, there must be a good reason for her appearance today.

"Can I help at all, Joey? Or does this need Hilda's sage advice rather than mine?" 

"Well... it was actually you I really needed to talk to Nell. It's all a storm in a teacup really, but I've discovered a new story has been printed where... Um ..."

When it came to explaining the rumours, Joey found herself unaccountably shy. She didn't know whether Nell had chosen to stay single and not become a mother, and it seemed somehow cheeky to be telling her this, almost as if Joey herself had made the suggestion up.

"Well what? Spit it out Joey!" Nell asked, taking the opportunity for the less than school mistressly language while Hilda was away.

"Oh it's absurd, Nell. Truly absurd, but apparently it's in several papers today. They are saying you are my ... mother. That you had me illegitimately and Madge agreed to bring me up as her sister..."

Nell's face was a picture. Of all the things she might have expected to hear this was most certainly not one of them. Her mouth was stranded open and she remained speechless for quite a few moments.

Joey watched nervously, unsure which way Nell would take it. Having been away for so much of the past decade or so, she had only recently been able to build up much of a friendship on an adult basis with Hilda and Nell, and she still occasionally felt in awe of them, seeing them as figures of authority. She would be surprised to realise just how fondly Nell thought of her, having seen her grow from cheeky Middle to responsible head girl, and following her career with pride later on. 

Nell came to her senses and looked at Joey, before trying to speak, then as the humour of the situation hit her, spluttered into laughter instead. Joey grinned in relief, and couldn't help but laugh now at Nell's expression on hearing the news.

"What will they think of next?" Nell said eventually, wiping the tears from her eyes and resisting gurgling back into laughter again. "Where on EARTH did they get that from?"

"I really don't know. I found out from a friendly journalist - oh and you'll be pleased by this too - he's related to Herr Braun! The family moved to England before the war and he's given me all sorts of news relating to him and his family."

Distracted by this news, Nell and Joey fell into discussion about their old friend and for a moment the news story was forgotten. Hilda's return broke up the discussion and they turned towards her, only to be struck by the rare sight of an angry Abbess, furious in fact.

"Hilda, what's happened?"

"What's wrong?"

They both spoke at once, Nell starting to rise out of her chair to go to her co-head. Hilda motioned her back down and turned to face Joey.

"I have just been speaking to Madge, about your press office's latest ... Efforts."

Joey stared; The ice in Hilda's voice was unmistakable, and directed towards her. Why on earth... But of course ! Hilda - and perhaps Madge - thought this was an attempt by Joey's agents to build publicity for her. A spark of anger in Joey began to flame, that they could misjudge her so greatly. It hurt that they would think she would use a friend in that way. However it flickered out as she thought back on the different stories that had been put out as her cover in the war, and all of the bad publicity that Madge and the school had had to deal with then.

It was perhaps reasonable that Hilda might think Joey had some knowledge of the situation. She knew Joey far less closely than Nell did, as she hadn't been involved as much with the Guides and Joey as a young adult, having been so occupied with the school all the time. Nell tried to smooth things over and bridge the gap between the pair, who were quite obviously feeling angry with each other, though at complete cross purposes.

"Hilda, that's exactly why Joey is here. She has just told me all about it, and it's absurd of course. She knew nothing of it till this morning - in fact it seems likely that Madge knew almost before she did."

The ice in Hilda's eyes began to melt slightly, and she listened as Joey explained, more haltingly this time, about Mr Brown's visit, and the shock that she had had on hearing the news.

"And I came over here straight away. I didn't stop to think about ringing Madge, I just wanted to warn Nell" Joey finished, then asked a question of her own. "Why was Madge ringing you about it before me? I'd have thought she would have spoken to me first."

"She tried this morning, only to be told by your assistant that you were talking to the press, and your assistant couldn't say when you would be free. Madge was most unimpressed, she was given the impression that you'd told the girl to put off all calls except from journalists"

Joey's eyes darkened and she explained that the message hadn't been passed on, and that she'd made no such request. She asked permission to use their phone to ring and explain to Madge. Not least because she didn't trust herself to go back home quite yet, or she would struggle to sack Margaret calmly and sensibly without resorting to telling the girl exactly what she thought of her. Hilda nodded agreement, and the co-heads were left alone again.

"You still seem angry dear, surely you can see Joey had no part in this ?" Nell began carefully, too attuned to Hilda's mood to not be aware of the remaining coldness in her attitude towards the girl.

"It isn't her fault directly, no, but I still remember how long it took us to recover from being labelled a Nazi sympathiser school, and then having people taking pictures and looking for stories all the time when she was working more in english films. She has no idea of the extra work she causes with these things. Oh I'm sure I'll calm down soon, but I can't help but wonder whether these people she employs to do her publicity really have the faintest understanding of the chaos they cause."

"It does sound as though this wasn't intentional, Joey said the press office really haven't been active in these sorts of things for some time, since she's been trying to have a bit of a quieter life. She seemed really upset about it when she began to tell me, I honestly don't think she takes our privacy and her own lightly, Hilda."

The conversation had to be cut short there with Joey's return. She had been able to get through finally to Madge and explain, and had the story itself read out to her over the phone. After laughing at the stupidity of it all, she had said goodbye to her sister, rung her press office to confirm that they were dealing with the issue, then returned to the others. 

The shock from Hilda's reaction on top of her earlier panic from Mr Brown's visit had begun to take it's toll, and she felt most lightheaded and headachey. She was less close to hilda, but her opinion mattered a lot to Jo, and it had been painful to see the anger and distaste in Miss Annersley's eyes. 

\---

As she entered, both woman looking up at her exclaimed and steered her towards a seat and a fresh cup of tea.

"Joey you look terrible" said Nell. "Take a moment and don't try to talk just now. Drink up and sit there quietly."

She did as she was told, and gradually some colour returned to her cheeks. Thankfully her shakiness had melted the last of Hilda's anger, so at least there was one positive outcome of being 'such a spineless jellyfish' as she described it, making both heads laugh at her fierceness.

Once she seemed better, they asked her why this story had upset her so much. It wasn't exactly hard to disprove, she and Madge and Dick all shared clear family resemblances, and she had a birth certificate showing her mother as being Mrs Bettany, not Miss Wilson.

"I think it's just the suggestion that the story came from someone close to me." Joey said slowly. "Also when he arrived I thought he was suggesting it was me that had an illegitimate child. Or had a secret affair or... Well you know the type of thing. Silly really to get so upset."

Hilda and Nell looked at each other, and Hilda gave a silent nod. They'd suspected Joey had a secret for some time, and now was as good a time as ever to make the move and ask the question. Nell said a quick prayer and hoped that she wasn't setting too many cats among pigeons by admitting what was starting to become obvious to all those who knew and loved the people involved.

"You were worried someone had told the papers about Con?"


	22. Chapter 22

Joey looked up in shock and panic. Her worst nightmare was that people would find out, and now out of the blue it had happened. The carefully arranged seclusion and planned lies from so many years ago were becoming unravelled. She wasn't afraid for herself any more, although it would probably damage her career, but was fiercely protective of the little family Jack and Rosalie had built. 

She loved all of the triplets, whether her daughter or Jack and Rosalie's twins, and she knew they thought themselves to be triplets. What would it do to them to find out from a newspaper, or teasing at school, that they weren't in fact related?

"How...what? What do you mean?" She finally managed to stutter out. 

Hilda looked at her grey face and left the room for Matey. She had forgotten in the years of knowing Joey-the-celebrity that there was still that excitable child Joey Bettany in there, and she could see that the shock of realising her secret was known to others was likely to be a final straw.

Left alone with Nell, her friend took Joey's hands into her own to warm them.

"It isn't common knowledge Joey, don't worry. Most people would never suspect anything. But you have to remember we've known you since you were young, and have been unofficial family to many of your nephews and nieces. We realised a few years ago just who Con reminded us of, and as the girls have grown and Len and Margot remained so alike and Con so different to the other two, we confided in each other about our suspicions."

Nell made her take a drink, glad to see a little colour returning to Jo's face.

"We weren't totally sure, after all it could have been a coincidence. It wasn't until Phil arrived here and we saw the resemblance with him too that we finally made sense of the whole thing."

Joey tried to speak but failed, thoughts whirling in her head in panic, she'd blinded herself to the similarities with herself, but had noticed the parts of Phil in Con several times as the girl began to grow towards her teens.

"Stop me if I'm wrong, or if it is too private, but I've wondered for years why you did it. Was it when Phil had been apparently killed in action?"

Joey nodded wordlessly, trying to blink back tears and wondering where Rosalie was, she needed to talk to her.

Rosalie was Con's mother, and in Joey's eyes, she always had been. When Joey had made that decision to hide away with them at the cottage, pretend the child was Rosalie's she had been determined to do it properly or not at all. Her plan had been so naive at first, to give them her baby if Rosalie's hadn't survived, as had happened with so many of the previous pregnancies. 

Then when she began to show and Rosalie's own pregnancy had gone so well, the long discussions with them into the night about whether they wanted to do this, whether they could cope with two babies; Joey's unspoken fear that their own child would always be favoured, that they wouldn't treat them as twins. The careful seeding with friends and family of suggestions that the doctor suspected Rosalie was having more than one baby, so that the pair could be introduced as non identical twins.

It had been a huge shock, when a few days after Con had been born, Rosalie went into it labour herself and actually DID have twins. That was perhaps the only point where the plan might have fallen apart.

If Joey had known Phil was alive, she would have kept Con, dealt with the loss of her career, but without him and with Jack and Rosalie clearly adoring all three babies she had made that final cut, left to go on tour, and in her mind gave up the right to be Con's mother.

It had been the right decision, looking back. That young Joey was still needing adventures, still wanting to have her career, excitement and wasn't equipped for the hard road being an unmarried single mother in the war would have been.

She turned her attention back to Nell with difficulty. What was she saying? She asked her to repeat it.

"Please excuse the question, Joey, but we don't want to cause any problems if he doesn't know."

"Who doesn't know? Jack ? He knows, he was there at both births !"

"No, I mean Phil, does he know?"

Joey was quiet for a moment, her personal privacy had been so precious for a long time that a little part of her felt like telling them it was none of their business. She knew Nell and Hilda were not naturally nosy, it was a reasonable thing to ask, so that they didn't cause any problems if Phil didn't know.

It had been a hard decision, once she knew Phil was alive, whether to tell him. Phil's mental state had been fragile for so long, so to begin with she really didn't think he could cope with the information. 

It wasn't just his life and her own she had to consider, Con was happy and loved with Jack and Rosalie. If Phil refused to keep the secret, or reacted badly, it might seriously disrupt a happy home, all to soothe her guilt that Phil didn't know he had a daughter.

It hadn't been until they all settled on the Platz, and Phil became almost an uncle to the girls anyway, that she had been able to ever really consider it. Even then she would probably have procrastinated and left it as long as she could. It had been Jack that had come to her and suggested it.

"Phil isn't stupid, Joey, he's already started to say Con reminds him of someone." Jack had said. 

"I'm not surprised, she's a complete cross between you and his sister." 

Joey had been unsure what to say, she had hoped only she noticed the resemblance. 

Jack continued. 

"Rosalie and I have talked this through, and we feel he ought to know - or rather that he's going to work it out. We...I thought he ought to find out from you, but I can do it if you'd like me to tell him?"

"No...it should be me." Joey had replied, much as she was tempted by his offer. She was the one who had made the decision to give away his child, she had to be the one to explain.

She delayed for many weeks, always feeling that she didn't want to spoil the moment, or that his state of mind wasn't quite right. Finally however, she had managed to make herself do it, to explain why Con seemed so familiar. 

In reply, his silence had been deafening. She didn't know whether to leave him to think through in peace, or keep trying to explain.

"I'm so sorry it has taken so long, I ... should have told you years ago."

"Why didn't you?" His tone was harsh. 

Phil was normally so quiet and calm, it came as a shock to hear such emotion in his voice.

"I was afraid... It wasn't just my secret to hide, and... and..." She stuttered to a halt. She was afraid to admit that her biggest reason had been fear of losing him. 

Neither of them were admitting that they were now far closer than ordinary friends. The situation was so fragile, and she valued this friendship so much, she had been afraid to do anything to either move it on - or in the case of admitting her secret - to risk him rejecting her. 

"I should have guessed, she looks so like you... And Helen too, that was why she seemed so familiar. She has my sister's nose, her smile." He was now calmer, but still speaking with a strange detachment, and refusing to catch her eye as he spoke. "So does everyone know? Have they all been just...humouring me?"

"Oh NO! It's only Jack and Rosalie who know."

"Don't be absurd, Joey. How could you have had a child without your sister or Jem knowing?"

"Honestly, Phil, it's true. I lived with Jack and Rosalie, and no one saw me for many months. She was such a tiny baby, I really didn't show much till quite late - in fact I didn't know myself what was going on, I thought I was run down, tired after the touring."

"Why didn't you let me know when you found out? Even if you didn't want her, I would have looked after her, my sisters could have helped, she wasn't just yours to give away!"

Joey bit her lip. It was true, and had she thought him alive she would have involved him, whatever the cost to her reputation and career. But the news of his loss had come at the same time as discovery of her pregnancy, she really had felt it was better not to upset his family. 

She hadn't thought they would believe her. After all at that time being an actress wasn't the most conventional or respectable of professions. They might have had the baby taken away from her and she would have lost both access to Con and her reputation. Now that she knew Helen Graves she realised that they would have helped, but at the time they were complete strangers. 

"I...you were...I th..thought..." 

She was struggling not to cry, sure that he would never want to spend time with her again. It had been such a complicated situation, and she had been so much younger, had wanted a chance for a career so much. Sometimes when she looked back, she didn't know whether she had done the right thing for herself, especially now, when so many of her friends had children and she had none she could officially call her own. 

However, for Con she still felt it was the best decision she could have made. Phil had been presumed dead, and his sisters were still very young at that point, and she hadn't known them at all. Jack and Rosalie had loved Con like one of their own, and she had been given a childhood out of the public eye. All of these things ran through her head and she struggled to know how to explain, whether even to try.

Meanwhile Phil had calmed down, and with a clearer head, had realised just when the pregnancy had taken place. He couldn't have helped, he was barely able to know who he was at that point, let alone deal with the knowledge of a baby. 

Finally he looked at her properly.

"You thought I was dead. Of course... you didn't know, did you?"

She shook her head, unable to reply. As he thought back to the state he'd been in, and his sister admitting they didn't know whether to believe him alive or not, he realised that Jo had had good reason for her actions. He was still struggling to process the information, but he was no longer angry. 

He excused himself from Joey and went for a long walk, trying to work out just what he should do about it. In the end it was only after a long conversation with Jack that he had begun to accept the new information, forgive her and gradually begin to rebuild his friendship with Joey. 

This was why he and Joey were frustrating their friends so much with their relationship. It seemed that they were fated to never get further than close friendship, despite each clearly having fallen for the other. 

This was another reason Joey was upset to realise that other people had guessed. It was still only a few months since she had had to have that conversation with Phil, and although they were now talking to each other almost normally again, there was still a reserve that neither quite knew how to get past. Even now that there were no secrets between them, they were circling round each other, neither quite confident enough to make that extra move. Friendship after all was a lot better than nothing, and much better than rejection if they were wrong in how the other felt.

Joey brought herself back to the present with an effort, and explained to Nell that Phil did know, but hadn't been told until quite recently. She didn't feel that it needed explanation, Phil's history was an open secret on the Platz, and she knew that Nell and Hilda wouldn't gossip about it.

She looked at the pair, and felt a mixture of irritation that she had to face the situation now, along with a relief that at least they knew. She needed to talk to Rosalie as soon as possible, let her know what had happened, after all her friend worked with Nell and Hilda every day, she needed to know that they had guessed.

Joey excused herself and made her way to the office. Rosalie took the news with her customary calm, then dropped a further bombshell on her, leaving Joey wondering if anyone DIDN'T know.

"I think Madge has guessed as well Joey. She was staring really intensely at Con on her last visit, and I found her looking at some of the baby photos. I think she was comparing them with one of you when you were younger."

Joey could tell that Rosalie wasn't truly that happy with the situation, and didn't blame her. It had always been a risk, being so close to Joey's family, but they had all managed to convince themselves that no one would guess. Now that assumption had been proven wrong, and Rosalie's world felt suddenly very fragile.

There was nothing Joey could do to talk things through with her in such a public place, as Rosalie's other office colleagues were soon due back, so Joey simply pressed her hand and looked at her, hoping that she was passing on the message that they would talk properly another time. Rosalie gave a weak grin back, and that had to do, since Joey needed to get back home to try to deal with the publicity issues.

Rosalie watched her go and tried not to worry. She knew that Jack felt Con, Len and Margot needed to know, that they ought to find out from them, not from anyone else guessing and being indiscrete. Rosalie had kept putting off the problem, convinced that Con was too young. After all, the secret had been kept this long, it could wait a little longer. Now it seemed that he had been right. 

Rosalie didn't know how the girls would react, but she knew that once they had been told, nothing would ever be quite the same again. The longer she could put that moment off, the happier she would be.


	23. Chapter 23

Joey made her way back to her house, narrowly missing being mobbed by an excited band of middles on their way to games. She saw them in the distance and dodged behind a tree, then ran for it. 

Had she looked a little closer, she would have made the time to at least say hello, for the little group was made up of the Triplets and some of their friends. However she was too distracted to realise, and missed the opportunity to make it clear that her assistant shouldn’t have sent any of them away without seeing her. 

Sharp eyed Con saw her, and looked sad, but didn’t make any comment to the others. Aunty Joey must be busy at the moment, hopefully she would be back to her normal welcoming self soon. 

Joey arrived back at the house, heartily congratulating herself on escaping the middles, only to walk straight into a gaggle of journalists and photographers. 

She swore under her breath, and pushed her way through to the door, ignoring them. Bitter experience had told her that even a “No comment” would be misreported, and they would easily take anything she said and fit it to whatever story they wanted to sell. 

Shutting the door firmly behind her, she paused in the Hallway, wondering whether she was calm enough yet to speak to her assistant. Margaret had been a complete disaster, and the emotional side of Joey wanted her gone from her home as soon as possible. Having her leave just now with the press outside the door would be far from sensible however. 

She decided to try to wait a couple of days, perhaps send Margaret to England on some errand, and then let the girl go, make some excuse perhaps about not needing an assistant any more. Her agent would be able to find the girl a role elsewhere, and hopefully by that time the story about her being Nell Wilson’s illegitimate daughter would have died down. 

Thinking about the news story brought Joey’s musings round to her eventful morning. 

She frowned, knowing that she needed to talk to several people, Phil among them. The laughable story about her parentage had been her reason for visiting Hilda and Nell, but the pair had spun her completely around by admitting they had guessed her true secret. 

Not only that, but it seemed that Madge might be close to guessing that Joey was actually Con’s mother. Who knows who else might realise? 

Joey had been proud of how well she, Jack and Rosalie had kept the secret, but the pool of people who knew was becoming wider and wider. The chance of it all staying private got less with every person who shared the secret. 

“Oh damn and blast it all!” She said to herself, pulling a face. “What a mess!”

Suddenly very tired, Joey sat down heavily, and pulled her big cloak around her, feeling the need for extra warmth. Why now? She’d been so happy with things recently, getting closer to Phil again, having a bit more privacy and peace to write. She had loved being able to be an honorary Aunt to not just Con but Len and Margot. Now it looked like everything would change. 

She looked towards the telephone and wondered whether to call Phil, make sure he knew straight away that more people had guessed their secret. She really didn’t want to, he had only found out himself a few months ago, and had been convinced to begin with that it had been some open secret, that everyone knew and was laughing at him. 

He had recovered so well from his horrific experiences as a prisoner of war, but there was still a part of him that was fragile, couldn’t quite believe he was a good and stable person who deserved a happy life. It had been hard to regain his trust after her revelation, although he did understand eventually why she had done it. After all, she thought him dead, had been young, not ready for parenthood, settling down, or to give up her career. 

Joey brought herself back to the present and shook her head. She wanted to let him know more people knew their secret as soon as she could, but the telephone wasn’t the way to do it. 

It was only Nell and Hilda who knew so far, anyway, and she trusted them not to be suddenly discussing it with Phil, or anyone else for that matter. She needed to deal with the more immediate crisis. 

She had set her press office going with damage control, and was confident that the current foolish tale would do no real harm on it’s own. Unfortunately it would stir up interest in her again. Above all, she needed to make sure that that fool Margaret didn’t get the faintest whiff of the real story. 

She stood and strode purposefully to her office. A few moments thought and a letter to her English office and she had a document ready and sealed. Inside was a carefully worded note asking the press office to give Margaret some tasks there for a few weeks, then give her notice, a sum of money and a reference, and help her to find her another job if wanted. 

It was more than the foolish girl really had earned, but Joey was wise enough to know that it was better to manage the situation than have the short term pleasure of telling the secretary just how useless she had been. 

She was about to press the bell on her desk to get Margaret’s attention when she heard the faint murmur of voices from her secretary’s office, and was immediately on guard. She made her way quietly over, then opened the door firmly and stepped into the room. 

She was wholly unsurprised to find a guilty looking Margaret caught in mid chat with a man Joey recognised as a journalist from one of the seedier gossip papers. Her secretary was chattering on, and Joey suspected it wasn’t her own gossip she was sharing, a fact confirmed by the flare of red across the young girl’s cheeks as Joey entered the room. 

‘Oh! I... I...” Margaret stammered, her original plan if caught to pretend to be helping by entertaining the journalist suddenly seemed a very poor one, as she saw the cold fury in her boss’s eyes. 

“Miss Wilson, so great to see you again, I was wondering if we could have a quote...” the journalist began, turning towards her, then caught sight of her angry face and changed tack, slipping quickly out of his seat and getting a safe distance from the famous woman. 

Much as he would love to be able to write a story about being thrown out of a diva film star’s home, he also had too many nuggets of great information in his notebook, and he had no intention of risking her grabbing it or being unable to use anything by her getting to his editor before he wrote the story. 

Joey was wise to the ways of journalists, and would very much have liked to see what her foolish assistant had been saying, but knew the moment to grab the book had passed. She was reasonably hopeful that he was just trying to follow up on the story of her mother being Nell Wilson, so decided to let him slink away. 

In the following weeks she berated herself for not realising that there was always more than one story the media could latch onto, but in reality there was no way she could know what would happen, or how it would hurt those she loved. 

“Please escort this gentleman from the house, Margaret, and then return to me here.”

Joey was holding herself together with only the greatest effort. She gripped the edge of a nearby desk hard to steady herself, and focused on the fact that she didn’t want to give the press the pleasure of her apparently sacking Margaret immediately. She had to revise her original plan, to send the girl off immediately alone, and decided to take her off somewhere... Innsbruck maybe... then send her from there on her ‘errand’ to England. At least that might also draw the press away, give her friends and the school a break. 

In fact, since she needed to talk to Madge, why not go the whole way back to England, take a break for a few weeks, come back once things had calmed down. If they DID calm down, god only knew what rubbish Margaret had been telling the reporter. 

Joey held herself together, and managed to just keep her displeasure to an icy coldness, not the boiling rage she had wanted to unload. When the girl returned she gave her instructions to pack and be ready to leave with Joey in three hours. 

Margaret didn’t argue, and not being a completely stupid girl, she packed all of her belongings. If she did return, her boss would be paying for the baggage each way anyway, and if, as she suspected, she was to be let go, it would save risking anything being lost if they were packed up by someone else. 

Joey paced her study, trying to work out her best course of action. She looked outside, and saw the photographers stalking the main house, considered again ringing Phil, but her time working for the secret service had made her wary of telephones, and she didn’t trust this type of newspaper hack not to have tapped the line for information. She would have to wait until she returned from Innsbruck, and have a proper conversation with him then. 

With Joey, to think was to act, and so she was soon on the train away from the Platz, managing to keep civil enough conversation with Margaret by pretending to herself she was in character, and that the director had not called “cut” yet, so she had to continue. 

It was a strain however, so in Basle, she feigned a migraine, and sent the girl on ahead with her letter. Once the girl was gone, she breathed a sigh of relief, and realise as she relaxed, a true migraine was imminent, so booked a hotel, and gave herself a chance to sleep properly for a couple of nights before continuing on to England. 

In future weeks, she was grateful for whatever prompted her to take that time, because without it the chaos and stress that greeted her arrival back in the UK would otherwise have floored her completely. 

—


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bit more. Not sure if this will make sense as it was written a few years ago!

Back on the Platz, life went on much as normal. Everyone was so used to Joey appearing and reappearing, most people didn’t pay a lot of attention to whether she was at home or not. 

Phil would have wondered about her leaving, but for the first few days was occupied fully with a few very serious cases. Jack and Rosalie guessed correctly that Jo was trying to take the focus away from the Platz and were grateful, as were Hilda and Nell. 

Unfortunately for everyone concerned, Jo’s migraine had turned out to be a stomach upset, and she was far too ill for a few days to even think about contacting anyone.

One morning, Hilary and Nancy were relaxing before heading over to the school to start work, when the telephone rang. They both jumped, and looked at each other in surprise. 

They only had the line because Joey had insisted on fitting one; neither was that used to talking to people on it, nor could they afford much in the way of calls back to England. 

They had almost forgotten they had one, so the noise was completely unfamiliar. There was a brief silent argument by expression and gesture trying to get the other to pick it up, though afterwards they realise just how absurd it was to not speak, given that they hadn’t picked the phone up. 

Finally Hilary glared at Nancy and picked it up, pulling a sheet around herself, feeling quite exposed to be in her nightwear and answering the phone. 

“Er...hello?” Hilary began, only to blink rapidly and gape as a frantic Rosalie gabbled at her. 

“Wait, Rosalie, slow down. What has happened? WHY shouldn’t we come in to work?”

“I can’t explain, just stay where you are, we’re just trying to work out what to do. Bill and the Abbess are up at the school and dealing with them now, but they don’t want any more pictures just now, so STAY PUT! Oh and don’t use the phone any more than you have to.”

“Wha... pictures? Rosalie what...?” 

But the phone had been put down, and all the pair could do was look at each other in bemusement. They really couldn’t understand what was going on, but Rosalie was one of the calmest people they knew. If she was in enough of a flap to be incoherent, it must be something serious. They decided all they could do was get ready and dressed, and then wait to hear more. 

Over at Jack and Rosalie’s house, the normally unflappable secretary was storming around, getting dressed and ready herself. Unusually, Jack was not at home, having been called to a patient in the night, and not returned home yet. 

He rarely stayed away much, a benefit of living so close to the San, as most of the time he could do what was needed in a few hours and be back in bed before she really realised he was gone. It was just typical that this day would be an exception to the rule. Rosalie was badly rattled, and would have liked to have him there to calm her, but there was nothing to be done. 

At least she didn’t have to get the girls ready for school, since they had gone to being weekly boarders, so that they didn’t miss out on school activities. Rosalie missed them, but felt it was the right thing for them, and good preparation for the winters which were so snowy that the road was often blocked. 

She finally managed to get herself together and off to the school. It was as bad as she had feared. As she drew up to the gates, Rosalie was surrounded by press and photographers, hoping she might be someone worth taking a picture of. 

She stared stonily ahead and ignored them, and shortly was sitting in Hilda’s salon, looking aghast at the spread of newspapers before her. 

“Bloody Joey and her carelessness !” 

Rosalie looked at Hilda, in awe to hear the usually so carefully spoken headmistress swear. The nickname The Abbess had followed Hilda Annersley in part due to her dignified and level leadership, and Rosalie had barely ever seen her upset, let alone utter an expletive, even a mild one. It was a measure of how upset she was, and it was completely understandable. 

The school had weathered many storms, but this seemed to be worse than any of them. Nell stayed quiet, knowing Hilda was near tears at the decision she would probably have to make. 

They looked around at the headlines spread all over the desk, chairs and floor. 

“JOEY WILSON’S LOVE NEST”

“SECRET OF STAR’S SCHOOL MISTRESS LOVER”

“SCANDAL HITS PROMINENT GIRLS SCHOOL” 

“ARE THESE GIRLS SAFE? SCHOOL MUST HAVE KNOWN OF SINFUL LIFESTYLE?”

The three of them looked at each other. The main office staff could be heard, not far away, answering call after call, mainly with a ‘No Comment’, but having to deal with concerned parents calling, and make excused for why Hilda or Nell couldn’t answer the phone. 

“I honestly don’t think she had anything to do with it, Hilda” Nell began, but Hilda cut her off. 

“Oh I’m sure she didn’t, but it just seems that chaos follows that girl,around! What on earth was she doing embracing a member of staff like that in the school anyway? IS it Nancy? It doesn’t look like her.”

Rosalie looked at the picture and remembered the day Joey had come to visit. 

“I THINK it’s Peggy. She was the one who leapt at Joey - you know how enthusiastic she is. It really was completely innocent, it’s just the way it’s presented that makes it look like an embrace.”

“It’s the picture of Nancy that bothers me.” Nell said, looking at a different paper. “We really should have thought about how it might look, her striding around in slacks, her Hilary and Jo in and out of their Chalet.”

“It shouldn’t matter.” Hilda said, still fuming at the damage to the reputation of the school, and still angry at Joey. “Nancy would be able to just hide if it wasn’t for all the rest, and for Joey attracting people here to take advantage of how it looks. Now it looks like I’ll have to make Nancy stay at home at least, we can hardly get her to look more feminine all of a sudden. The damage has been done. Oh, I just don’t even know where to start.”

Rosalie stared at the papers. She felt angry and scared all at the same time. This story was a big one. There were photos making it seem that Joey and Nancy lived together in the open, and the picture of Joey being embraced by a young woman made it look as though this was not only being ignored by the school, but that they were apparently being visibly affectionate in the school buildings. 

Joey’s previous close association with Cornelia Flower, and the fact she lived with Cornelia’s family for some time was being used as further evidence, for Cornelia had already gone through trial by media and considered to be a ‘queer’, not helped by her success in a traditionally male field. 

Rosalie suddenly remembered that she hadn’t explained to Hilary and Nancy what was going on. 

“We need to let them know. They’ll be getting calls, or maybe even get the papers” she said. 

“They won’t see it in the paper, they don’t have one delivered, they always wait to get here and steal mine.” Nell said absently. 

She was staring at the headline “SCHOOL ALLOWS DEVIENT FILM STAR FREE RUN OF GROUNDS” which was over a picture of Joey near the school with a gaggle of middles surrounding her, clearly hero worshipped by the young girls. 

“Still, we need to explain. Shall I go over?” Rosalie pushed.

“No, we don’t want any more pictures of female staff apparently going into Joey’s house. Can Jack go?”

Rosalie shook her head. “He has a patient who is dying. I can’t take him away from that.” 

They understood immediately. Jack hated to lose a patient, and rarely did, but when he did, it hit him hard, and none of them divert him from his battle to help to the very end. 

“What about Phil Graves?”

Rosalie looked doubtful. She knew Phil was struggling a bit at present. She had spoken to him, and accidentally let slip that Hilda and Nell and probably Madge knew about Con, never dreaming that Joey would have gone away without telling him. 

He had taken it badly, thinking Joey didn’t trust him to cope, and getting worried about how many people knew. He was worrying about whether to tell Con, and Rosalie just wasn’t really ready for that yet. 

Still, he was close to both Hilary and Nancy, having known them since the time of Joey and Hilary’s flatshare, and he was male and already knew about their relationship. 

He was the best choice. Rosalie made her way to the phone and asked him to go and explain things to Hilary and Nancy. She just had to hope that he could cope, that the press would leave him alone, not make things worse.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for a short fairly uneventful chapter, but life has suddenly got busy again, and I need to make sure I don’t leave the story on a big cliff later on, so sorry but thought this was better than no update at all!

Phil put the phone handset down and looked at it. He really didn’t want to do this, the idea of facing cameras and reporters filled him with dread. But his friends needed him, and he wasn’t going to let either Rosalie or Nancy & Hilary down. 

He had a free morning, so decided to get it over with and get straight over there. As expected, the place was surrounded by photographers, all setting off flashes in his face, and shouting questions at him. 

By the time he had reached the front door of Hilary and Nancy’s flat, he was struggling to hold himself together. He was thankful that Hilary had seen him approach and pulled him swiftly inside almost as soon as he knocked. 

“What IS going on Phil?”

“Has someone died? Or have they found out about Con? Is Joey ok? ”

The two questions were fired at him simultaneously by both Nancy and Hilary, who had been getting more and more frantic as the morning wore on. They didn’t dare answer the phone, or step outside, but their imaginations had been running wild. 

Phil felt as if someone had punched him in the stomach. Nancy had thrown the question out about Con as if it was common knowledge. If she’d been in her normal state of mind she would never have asked. She and Hilary had guessed some time ago, and lived too closely with Joey not to realise the resemblance. They’d been afraid for some time that the story might break, and it never occurred to them that the newspaper people outside were wanting to see them. 

“No..I... you...” Phil felt strangled, almost faint, then calmed down. Something in him switched, went cold. Joey clearly told people or knew they had guessed, and she didn’t let him know. He didn’t ask her for much, but to be kept aware of details of their daughter was important. 

She disappeared off without a word, and now this mess was all over the news. 

She didn’t trust him, and didn’t understand him, or care about his feelings, if she could put her career first like this, above her friendships. 

Phil felt humiliated, as if she had encouraged people to laugh behind his back at him. He bubbled with an uncharacteristic anger, and felt as if he really didn’t know her at all. 

“Phil? What...what is it?”  
“Please Phil, we need to know.”

He looked at Hilary and Nancy and mentally shook himself. They weren’t to blame, they were just another set of people caught in the wake of Joey’s fame, other victims of her career. 

He explained what had happened, and they both went white, immediately grasping how serious this was, both for the school and them. 

Nancy clenched her fists, and turned away. She looked across the room with unseeing eyes, and blinked back tears. She had loved working at the school, being able to have an almost ‘normal’ life with Hilary. Now these pictures seemed likely to put the school in jeopardy. 

“I’ll have to resign.” 

Hilary and Phil immediately disagreed, tried to talk her out of it. 

“It’ll blow over, just wait.” 

“Surely that’s not necessary.” 

“Hilda and Nell won’t fire me, nor will Madge, but if they don’t, the school will be dragged into it all. I don’t want that to happen.”

“No Nancy! Even if it did help, you’d never get another post. Let it die down, see what happens.”

Nancy wanted to believe them, but it was the only way she could see to solve the problem. She wouldn’t let the school suffer, hard as it would be to resign. 

She went to the phone and called the school, and insisted on talking to the Heads. They were just as determined that she shouldn’t do this, but could offer her no other solution. 

“This way only I’m involved. You can say you sacked me if you want, I really don’t mind. It’ll make no difference to me really...well what else can we do?”

Phil looked at the brave woman, and cursed Joey’s fame, the pain it was all causing. Suddenly he had an idea. 

“Nancy...”

“It’s for the best, then it stops with me...”

“Nancy!”


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for delay, I had to reread the story to remember what had happened and work out what time we we in the Chalet timeline.

She turned to him in surprise. No one ever normally heard Phil raise his voice, he seldom even spoke. 

“What is it, Phil?”

“Why don’t we get married?”

They gaped at him. Nancy replied, doubtfully. 

“Well that would perhaps help, I suppose. Joey and you marrying would distract the press...”

“Not Joey. You and me.”

They looked at him in complete confusion. In the background, Nell and Hilda held onto the receiver over at the school and listened, hardly able to believe their ears. What was Phil thinking of? 

Hilary and Nancy had forgotten the phone call and were just staring at Phil, dumbstruck. 

He started to speak, fell over his words and tried again. 

“It makes sense. I’m not going to ever marry. You need a way to make this a non story. So marry me. We can go out now, make a statement, say this is all rubbish, you and I are engaged. Say this is all a complete misunderstanding. You and I were... oh I don’t know - meeting here for some time alone when you came over. Hilary helped us keep it secret or whatever makes sense” 

His friends stared at him. It would solve a lot of problems but would it work? 

“But... if we did. Would the press really leave the story alone?” 

“They will. And if they don’t... well we get married. No, not really, don’t look so scared! But I’ll never marry, you can’t. A civil ceremony, of course.”

“But... but ... what about Joey... you and Joey.” 

“There is no me and Joey.” 

They looked at him, stunned at the force behind his words. They knew Phil and Joey weren’t officially a couple, but everyone had expected them to end up together. They couldn’t really pry, especially as Joey seemed to have disappeared off again. 

“Why would they believe us? And anyway, I can’t carry on work after I’m married, so what is the point?”

“We don’t have to stay married, and I’m sure Hilda and Nell won’t enforce the no married women rule immediately. You come and live with me for a bit, then they can’t say you are a bad influence living at the school, or here. We just wait till everything has died down and you move back here, or the school, or wherever you decide.”

They looked at him, starting to wonder if it might actually work. Suddenly they heard a piercing whistle, bringing their attention back to the phone. Nancy looked at the receiver, startled, then put it her ear. 

Nell was speaking, having whistled to get their attention. Hilda had been listening to the same earpiece, and hadn’t been warned, so had leapt several feet away and was rubbing her ear and looking reproachfully at Nell, who merely grinned at her. 

“You know, he might be right. Oh I don’t mean you really marry him, Nancy, but what harm is there in announcing an engagement? There won’t be a story after the next few months. It does give us all something to use as an argument for you to stay. You were being extra discrete, not having a relationship in the open while working here, keeping things private.”

“Well I suppose... it does make some sense...” Nancy said, doubtfully. 

Now Nell had meant announcing something about a relationship, and made assumption that Phil and Joey were on good speaking terms, so would discuss this first. Nancy was in shock, but similarly was thinking of waiting to see if everything died down without this needing to be done. 

Unfortunately Phil, having made the mental break from his attachment to Joey, was in an unusually fired up and reckless mood. He saw Nancy nod and agree, and steeled himself instantly to do what had to be done. 

Spinning round, he opened the door and stood outside, speaking forcefully and refuting the allegations, talking about Nancy as “My Fiance”, and giving quotes left right and centre. 

It was all so sudden, that Hilary barely had time to issue a squeak and hide behind the door, leaving Nancy visibly shell shocked and feeling she had no choice but to be drawn out to be photographed with Phil’s arm around her, nod when asked if this was the true story. 

The papers weren’t really that interested, until someone dug up notes about Phil’s war history. Suddenly the headlines were just juicy enough to be worth printing. It helped that none of the main papers really liked the fact the original scoop had come from the gossip paper, and no it seemed a wasted journey every journalist there wanted to discredit them. 

So it was that Joey, surfacing from couple of days mainly asleep, was faced not only with the original scandal, but the surprising follow up. 

She stared at newspaper pictures of Phil embracing Nancy, and didn’t quite know what to think. 

“WAR HERO P.O.W SAYS ‘SHE’S MINE!”

“WILL STAR JOEY WILSON SUE OVER ALLEGATIONS?”

“SCHOOL MISTRESS IS MY MISTRESS, SAYS HERO DOC”

She immediately rang Phil, but was met by stony silence, then the click of the handset. When she rang back, no one answered. She didn’t dare ring anyone else. If, as she suspected, it was a cover up story, she couldn’t risk someone overhearing. She would have to wait until she got back to the Platz. 

—


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for delay, life got in the way! Apologies for actual cliff!

Since she was in the UK, Joey decided to bite the bullet, and tell Madge about Con. If she already guessed, there was no point keep trying to hide it.

She drove nearly all the way to The Round House, before realising that Madge would probably be at the school. Pulling over, she tried to decide what to do. Emotionally she wanted to get the discussion done and out of the way as soon as possible, but she knew that she’d probably be noticed and mobbed by the girls even more in England and Wales than in Switzerland. 

More seriously, she didn’t know yet what the fall out from this latest press issue would be. The Swiss branch school was already suffering due to her fame, she didn’t want even the faintest chance of reporters managing to link her to the English one. 

“Oh damn, damn, DAMN it all!” Joey said, and starting driving again, with no real idea where she was headed. She felt tears pricking and struggling not to let them fall, then finally just gave in, and steered her way to the side of the road. 

She had loved so many parts of her career, but had started out when stars were allowed far more privacy. It seemed now as though the nightmare would never end. She could cope with her own life not being totally free, but how it was affecting those around her was becoming unbearable. 

She wiped tears away with the back of her hand and kept driving, randomly taking lefts and rights whenever a road felt more interesting. The peace of the countryside started to calm her, and she became distracted by all the little villages and towns she passed through. It occurred to her as she took yet another random turn, that she hadn’t done something like this for years, just go where fate took her. 

No one was expecting her, there was no time limit she needed to think about. As long as she kept fuelling the car whenever she could, she could keep going like this as long as she wanted. 

The irony of it made her smile for the first time since the news stories had been printed. The papers gave the impression of someone who had ultimate freedom, and choice. Nothing could be further from the truth most of the time. She did have money, and was able to follow her dreams in both writing and acting, and she was forever grateful for that luck. 

But really, she had to consider the impact of every decision, the potential cost of every choice. Ever since that time with Phil in London just before Con was born, Joey had been at the mercy of the Army, the secret service, the film studios. Even when she tried to move away from her war work her fame seemed to just increase. She had people invested in keeping it that way. Her publisher, press office, advisors. 

Over the years, her simplest decisions seem to be anything but simple. As her fame increased, so did the number of everyday things that had to be considered, planned, thought through. 

Now all of a sudden she was free, doing just what she wanted, going where she wanted. Normally if she made a trip here she’d be on a book tour, or helping to promote a film, sell a record. Or visiting family and swept up in their lives, following their timetable. It was immensely refreshing to just be doing something truly by herself. 

She felt herself getting tired, and noticed that the sun was getting low in the sky. She really needed to try to work out where she was, and find a place to sleep. Real life had to intrude, even if only to get away from these tiny roads and find a bigger one. The road signs had been removed in the war, and many had not been replaced even yet. She hoped she hadn’t wandered too far, but she wouldn’t know until she found at least a place name. 

Finally a sign came up, and she was jolted to realise that she was many miles from the Round house, and the light was fading fast. She decided to stop at the nearest town and see if there was a place to stay. 

Thankfully the next town had a good hotel, and she was soon settled in a clean, though slightly threadbare room. As she lay awake and looked at the ceiling, Joey felt as though she was in a dream. A huge desire came to her not to stop the driving, just to keep going, keep taking random turns and leaving her worries behind her. 

She didn’t have any urgent work, a holiday would do her good. But reality was creeping back with every hour, and her sense of responsibility returning with it. She needed to tell Madge her secret, and then get herself back home to the Platz, talk to Phil and face whatever music she had to. Finally, around 4am, she slipped into an uneasy slumber, dreams full of reporters, cameras and hurt friends and family. 

She’d hoped to be able to leave without attracting too much attention, but the receptionist had recognised her, and told everyone she could. The next morning was a farce Joey had played many times before, with star struck staff trying not to stare, trying to behave normally and failing miserably. From the way one of the managers kept glancing outside and trying to keep her talking, Joey guess that the press were on their way, he hoping for money from them or from her to help her escape. Many years of this sort of thing had made Joey a good judge of character. 

She cut him off far more abruptly than normal, pushed her way out of the doors and ran to the car. She didn’t even dare stop for fuel, knowing the press would chase her wherever she went if she didn’t hurry. 

To begin with the anger kept her driving stoney faced and with even less attention to her route than before. Finally after an hour, with no sign of pursuit, she slowed, and let her mind come back from it’s rage cloud. 

Why was Phil marrying Nancy? A cover up, she was sure, but if so why wouldn’t he talk to her? 

Having not seen the earlier papers, and not being quite herself, Joey didn’t really realise just how much trouble her fame had caused. She was hungry, tired and felt persecuted, even by her friends. 

Why hadn’t they warned her? She should have been told, at least so she could know what to say. Why was Phil not taking her calls? 

A less than rational part of her was boiling with jealousy. It couldn’t be true, could it? After all she knew many people in show business who loved both men and women. Had Nancy and Phil been an item for some time? What about Hilary? What on earth was going on?

Joey had been under stress for too long. The normal Jo would have seen this must be a false story, she knew how close Hilary and Nancy were. The logical thing would have been to write, or hurry back, talk to people properly, wait before making any assumptions. 

But something had snapped. 

Jo was tired. Tired of being moved about by the army or press like a chess piece. Tired of never seeming to be allowed to just rest and have a private life. Just tired. 

She saw a sign that looked vaguely familiar and realised she must have driven almost to the coast. On a whim she took the turning, ignoring her rumbling tummy. She’d get food, fuel and a proper map at the next big town. For now she wanted distraction. 

The road started off a sensible one, then suddenly turn by turn it narrowed. She had to concentrate more and more on her driving. To her right a break in the trees made her gasp. The road was crawling along the edge of a cliff, climbing higher and higher, and her tyres were just inches from the edge. She stopped for a moment, tried to see if the map she had made any sense, but quickly realised it wasn’t detailed enough to show this road, barely more than a track. 

She had to get back in the car, carry on. The road was too narrow to turn, and she just had to hope against hope that no one came the other way. One car would have to reverse, and there was no way she could imagine being able to do that without falling over the cliff. 

The hours ticked by, as she creeped along at the slowest pace she could, petrified of someone coming around one of the sharp corners. Moments where the road headed inland gave only brief relief, as it seemed to get narrower and narrower. Bushes scratched against the side of the car, and she had to not care, because any damage was worth not falling down the sheer drop beside her. 

The ordeal went on, the only sound the screeches of branches against the metal, mixed with the crashes of the waves. 

Surely the road would widen, or join somewhere safer? She didn’t even know now whether to hope for a turning space or not. She’d have to choose between turning and going back along a road she knew was dangerous, or continuing and risking the track not going anywhere or getting even more dangerous. Even a car would be welcome now, as at least she could ask the driver what lay ahead, know she wasn’t alone. 

All she could do was go on, teeth gritted, jaw aching with the tension of keeping safe. Tears dried on her cheeks, painful as she dare not move her hands from the wheel to brush them away. 

She just had to keep going. 

Keep on going. 

Just. 

Keep on

Going.


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for delay for more!

Back at the Platz, Phil was regretting not talking to Jo, but still angry. He had calmed down, and felt ashamed of jumping to conclusions. He still felt hurt and humiliated.

He’d struggled with the idea of being a father. This secret had been kept from him so long that he just didn’t quite know how to feel about it. He loved Con, loved all of the triplets. They were like nieces to him, and he wanted them to be safe and happy. However he didn’t feel any different about them knowing Con was his daughter, and he somehow felt he should. He had always been drawn to Con, for she did look just like Joey and his sister, and now he understood that connection. Even the sleepwalking made sense, for it was a common thing in his family. However he also loved Len’s adventurous spirit and Margot’s quick wit. Both had tempers, like Jack, but they were also quiet and measured, and loved peace. 

All three were a little young for their age in some ways. Not having any younger siblings they were only saved from being spoilt by Jack and Rosalie’s solid common sense and determination. They had grown up as the school babies due to Rosalie taking them in to work with her, so had been doted on by many of the older girls at the school as well as the teachers. 

They would have to be told one day, he was sure, but Phil thought it needed to be when they were much older. Now Joey’s carelessness seemed to be risking everyone knowing, and it seemed only a matter of time before it was International news. Phil had no idea that Joey had been just as floored as him to find out that some people had guessed, and in fact didn’t know about Hilary and Nancy knowing their secret yet herself. She was always impetuous, and now her rush from the Platz without properly talking to him had led to misunderstandings all round . 

His head ached, and everything felt so complicated all of a sudden. He didn’t know what to do with himself. Walking had always helped him, as did fresh air, so he got up and set off through the woods.

He walked without much of an idea where he was going. It wasn’t until he heard Hilary’s voice that he realised he had made his way to Jo’s house, yet again. 

“Phil?” 

He looked up, and saw the games mistress just leaving her flat, looking at him in concern. 

“Oh hi Hilary. How ... how are you?”

“I’m fine Phil. What about you? You don’t seem yourself, can I help?”

He bristled initially. He had fought so well with his mental health, he hated being told he wasn’t well, or wasn’t himself. 

However he and Hilary had years of friendship, and he knew he wasn’t quite right, so it was a reasonable comment. 

He got on well with Hilary, liked her down to earth common sense and how she looked out for Joey but didn’t interfere. In fact he had spent more time with her really than he had with Joey, for Joey was so often off on location. 

Hilary and Nancy had come to really like this gentle man, and often invited him to visit them when Joey was away. It was why the people of the Platz and San hadn’t really questioned him suddenly becoming engaged to Nancy, other than some being surprised it wasn’t Joey. 

It had hurt, to realise that many people hadn’t really seen his closeness to Joey as a true romance or courtship. Those closest to them realised, but the pair had been so discrete, and so careful that it now worked against them. Phil’s confidence was lower than it had been for many years. He began to question whether he and Joey really were ‘courting’, as he had been thinking of it for so long. Was she just being kind, trying to help a friend?

Or more cynically, was she just keeping him close to hide her secret? 

All these thoughts bounced around his brain, and just wouldn’t either settle to a fixed truth or leave. He looked at Hilary, and not quite sure where to start, asked if she had time for a chat. 

Hilary didn’t really, but as she looked at Phil’s face, and realised just how hard it was for him to ask for help, she decided on the instant that she just had to make time. She invited Phil in, after a quick look around for any cameramen or journalists, and asked him to sit down for a moment while she rang the school. She didn’t like the look of him, he had beads of sweat on his forehead, and a glazed look to his eyes. 

“Please don’t be Hilda that picks up, please...” she thought to herself, and gave an audible sound of relief when Rosalie answered. Hilda was always understanding, but had been pushed to the limit of her patience with Joey’s life impacting upon the school. She would never expect Hilary to ignore a serious need, but the explanations would be much more complicated, and it would just be easier with someone who knew them all better. Rosalie answering the phone was perfect. 

“Maynie, can you ask someone to set the Fourths to simple games in the gym. You know the sort of thing, bean bags etc. I’ll explain later... no no, nothing major, I just need to do something. Got to go, will tell you soon, I promise”

She went back to Phil, determined to work through with him his worries, and find out why he and Joey were suddenly so at odds. 

However it became clear quite quickly that he was rambling and starting to be a little incoherent. She looked at him and decided this just wasn’t the time. She suggested she run him over to his home in Nancy’s little car, and he agreed, too tired and confused to really resist. Hilary settled him at home and then called his sister at the San, knowing that she would be his best help right now. 

—— — -


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!

Rosalie put the phone down, wondering first what had unsettled Hilary enough to use the school nickname for her, then secondly what was so urgent that Hilary needed cover. She looked with concentration at the timetables for a moment, then with her customary efficiency sped to the Prefects room and sent a few of their number off to deal with the middles. 

With her flair for multitasking, she saw a chance to solve one of the minor problems affecting these damsels, and had a word with Clem Barrass, one of the prefects free of work enough to help out. 

“Clem, can you make sure Mary Lou and Vi Lucy are in the same team - and give them all a bit of a challenge? You know what that little group are like at the moment, totally tribal. Mix Vi’s Gang up with Mary Lou and Verity’s little clan.”

Clem nodded, understanding what was needed immediately. It had been part of a prefect discussion only the other day. 

She hoped Maynie’s plan would work, for the Fourths were totally split. Mary Lou and Verity-Anne had come from being quite important little people in the smaller Howells based Prep school, to joining a middle school already bonded by their experiences on the Island. Clem had been sad herself to be separated from Mary Lou when the schools had split, but since all of the older girls had gone to the Island as one, it hadn’t made much difference to her in school friendships. 

Mary Lou had developed a certain level of arrogance, spending so much time mainly with Verity Anne. While better than she started, Verity unfortunately hadn’t lost much of her belief in her superiority, and quite enjoyed being one of the eldest in a small school. 

Mary Lou looked out for her “sister by marriage” too much, and needed other friendships to balance the rather isolated little group that had formed around the pair. 

Clem had been pleased when she knew she and Mary Lou might be together again, and their own friendship had resumed on a similar level, but it had saddened her to see the all out warfare once the middles were remixed. 

Mary Lou still had a tendency to barrel in and take over, but with no one balancing that by taking her down a peg when needed, she hadn’t developed the tact and understanding of other people that she might have done in other circumstances. She hadn’t been challenged much by her gentle mother, and though her grandmother tried to give her more balance, it had kept Mary Lou quite an old fashioned soul. 

The hierarchy within the girls who had gone to the Island was well established, and on merging the schools again a “Them and Us” situation had developed that needed addressing. 

Julie Lucy, Vi’s older sister had summed it up perfectly at the meeting. 

As always she was scrupulously careful not to take her sister Vi’s side. If anything Clem knew she was probably stricter with Vi than some of the others. 

“I don’t think either side is really that diffferent to the other, but with them at odds, some of those on the fringes are getting far too much enjoyment out of the drama.” 

Julie was too fair a person to name names, but the prefects knew who she meant. Mary Woodley and a few of her followers were enjoying switching between the two sides and triggering arguments far too much. It made for a nasty atmosphere amongst the middles. 

Maynie must have noticed this too, mused Clem, and was thankful for an official suggestion to mix the little groups up a bit. 

The prefects had a quick conflab and came up with some exhausting but challenging games, well designed to shake some of the more sensible parts of the feuding middles into realising their common strengths. 

“Mary Lou is a good enough kid” Clem thought, as she observed the youngsters. 

“But Vi has a much better understanding of people sometimes. Oh I do wish Mary Lou would take Vi as a best friend, instead of Verity. Verity doesn’t mean it, but she really is just too confident in her own views and her own importance. If ever a kid needed some corners rubbing off, it’s that one!” 

The eagled eyed prefect had been watching carefully, and noticed Con Maynard was struggling with her breathing a little. Clem called her over to help referee, and with a quick scan of the others who might be struggling, took Barbara Chester out too. Barbara had only recently joined the school, having been ill for much of her childhood, and was struggling to find her place amongst a gang led by her cousin. Vi was a friendly soul, but very wary of her cousin, for Barbara had been petted and spoilt as a youngster due to the family not expecting her to live long. 

In a more stable situation, Clem suspected Vi would have welcomed Barbara more, as the girls did care for each other and would have been good friends in other circumstances. However with the struggle for unofficial leadership of the middles going on, Vi had not really been able to keep much of an eye on her cousin. 

As the game changed to one not needing referees, Clem set the two girls beside her to sorting out the beanbags ready to put away, and smiled as she half listened to their shy conversations. 

She had only been watching for people who were exerting themselves too much, but accidentally she seemed to have started a little friendship. It hadn’t been part of the plan, but she this might help form a link between Mary Lou and Vi’s sides. 

Clem had known Mary Lou first, but Rosalie and Jack had been welcoming to her too, and she had come to see the Maynard triplets as like young cousins. 

Len and Margot were still counted in the Juniors, so not involved in the melodrama unfolding that term. They were both bright for their age, and ahead of many of their age mates due to the year in Canada, and extra tutoring by Biddy O’Ryan. 

However neither had particular sparks of brilliance, and were quite happy continuing on just doing the best they could. Both had a tendency to enjoy routine and peace and were very organised. Con in earlier years where school work was marked as much on appearance and organisation had lagged behind them a little, since she was a messier, more intuitive learner. 

However the time with Biddy coaching, combined with a natural ability to make associations, had led to her moving ahead in the past year. Her poorer health, although much better now, had led to a tendency to want to read inside and be content doing homework more than Len and Margot, who loved to play sports. 

Her own love for History had fitted well with her tutor, and she had a natural flair for languages, whereas Len and Margot were good, but not exceptional. 

Now the school was back to taking lessons in the language of the day, she had shot ahead compared to any others, and it would have been unfair to keep her down. 

So Con was a Senior middle, in school at least, while her sisters remained juniors. She was happy enough, and Mary Lou always kept an eye out for her, made sure no one bullied her, but it was the first time that the Triplets were not together in class, and Con had struggled to make any particular friends, having never really needed to do so before. 

Barbara Chester was another shy girl, but she spoke fluent french, and as the games progressed, with today being a French Day, Clem realised the pair were enjoying the opportunity to have a more in depth conversation than many of their contemporaries could manage on those days. 

Clem’s instincts proved correct, and over the next few weeks a strong bond between the pair sprung up. They proved to be a help in the bigger problem faced by those managing the middles, for their friendship bridged a gap that had already started to narrow in that games session.   
Vi and Mary Lou had had to to work as a team, and at the same time the middles had a lot of the fidgets exercised out of them by a determined band of prefects. 

When Hilary Burn returned, the prefects took her into their confidence, and she approved their plan, and ruthlessly continued to mix the groups, keep Mary Lou and Verity apart, and helping to meld the Upper IVs into a whole. 

Hilda and Nell, always aware of the way the school was working, watched what was going on, and eventually made Vi and Mary-Lou joint heads of the Middle School, further cementing the friendship that was to make them a great team going forward. 

Con and Barbara, fast becoming inseparable, were another important pair. Their quiet common sense helped to diffuse otherwise tense situations. 

Con had inherited some of Phil’s gentle good nature, and Rosalie’s firm teaching about working as a team and her dealing early with Con’s tendency to moon had given the girl many skills to help mediate between the sides, despite her natural shyness. She identified with Verity’s mooniness, and the three quiet girls became firm friends, and helped pull the divided fourths together. 

All of this was in the future however, and it was a few weeks before Hilary and the prefects could do much about their plan. The flu that had taken Joey by surprise and sent Phil to his bed was soon to be found throughout the school and the Platz. 

With strict quarantine and excellent care from Matey and the San, the school weathered the flu well, although everyone had it by the end of the time, and everyone felt tired and out of sorts for some time after being technically well. 

—


	30. Chapter 30

Phil had gone from his talk with Hilary straight home to bed and, tipped off by Hilary, his sister had visited soon after. Strict bed rest and care did much for him, but he was not himself and able to even leave his bed for quite some time. The prisoner of war camp still haunted some of his dreams, and his previous ill health had left him vulnerable. 

As the days passed, and he started to feel better, Phil regretted his anger and began to worry, for it had been a long time with no word from Joey. He didn’t know what to think. Something didn’t feel right. 

He spoke to Jack and Rosalie, Hilda and Nell. No one seemed to know where she was. No one was too concerned, just assuming she was busy, and they had enough to do catching up with the chaos caused by the press invasion followed so swiftly by the flu. Joey did tend to disappear and not notify them, and she wasn’t usually that big a part of the day to day working of the school. 

Hilary and Nancy were concerned, but after managing to keep going till nearly at the end of the staff available, they had both succumbed to the flu and were not really able to suggest anything. Hilary particularly had been hit very hard by the illness, and kept having dreams of trying to lift people out of Bosherton’s lily ponds. 

Jack and Rosalie would normally have had more time to talk and might have helped, but they were too busy trying to keep the San and School running, added to which Margot had been very ill, and Len not much better. Surprisingly, perhaps because everyone expected her to get it and Matey had whisked her off to bed at the very first signs of tiredness, Con had not been as bad as some. 

Unfortunately Joey’s independence had a price. Her friends and family were so used to her not being there for months at a time that none of them realised that this time was different. They assumed she had gone to England, or to another film shoot, and didn’t really pay much attention. 

The only person who really realised something was wrong was Phil. While she was casual with many things, when it came to her travels, she did normally keep Phil informed. She knew he was happier with a clear idea of what to expect, and also aware that he saved his leave days to spend time together, so she usually let him know as much as she could about her plans. 

If she hadn’t have been so ill just after leaving the Platz, she would have made sure a message reached him properly, but she had been too groggy with what turned out to be the same 48 hour flu as the rest of the Platz. Then when she had called he had been too angry to answer. He regretted that more and more now, and battled between hurt pride and mounting panic that something had happened. He tried not to worry, but he just knew something wasn’t right. 

He finally plucked up courage, and called Madge, although scared he would be passed over to talk to Jo when he wasn’t sure what he felt, or what she thought of him. He had seen the papers, and felt an idiot for being so public so soon with the idea of marriage to Nancy. What had he been thinking? 

Madge, not realising the cover up situation, was initially quite frosty with him, for she knew Joey cared deeply for Phil. 

Rosalie was correct that she had had her suspicions about Con. Having known Rosalie and her family from a young age, she recognised many signs of similarity with the Dene and Maynard sides in Len and Margot but none at all with Con. Not so unusual, after all her own family tended to variety, but Con’s puckish face and pale complexion was becoming so like young Joey, it hadn’t taken much for Madge to do the maths and realise it was perfectly possible. 

She had been pleased to see that Joey might be settling down a bit, so was shocked by Phil’s sudden engagement, and so not inclined to help him get in touch with Joey without a bit more information. 

However she unbent a bit as it became clearer that the young man was really worried about her sister and answered his questions. 

No, Jo wasn’t with her, nor had she heard from her. She hadn’t contacted anyone at the school, or from the family.   
She would ask Jem when he got in, and try Joey’s agent. She reassured him, told him she was sure it was all ok, said they would call if they had any news.

Phil looked at the phone for a long time after the call ended. 

He didn’t know what to think. 

Did these people really not know where she was? Had she really contacted no one ? 

Or were they hiding her? Hiding her from him, afraid he was a danger to her? 

He rubbed his forehead, wishing his headache would go away. He had been having nightmares again, triggered by the temperature rise during the flu, and he felt he was taking a long time to recover fully. He struggled to think through a slurry of confusion. He probably was overreacting. Joey would be back, or would get in touch with SOMEONE soon. 

Still, he couldn’t convince himself. His instincts told him something was wrong. Very wrong. 

He wasn’t able to return yet to work, in part for risk of spreading to patients, but mainly because everyone could see he wasn’t really well enough. He hadn’t travelled anywhere much in recent years, for it took all of his mental and physical energy to cope with work and daily life on the Platz. 

Finally, he could stand it no longer, and decided he had to do something. He packed his bags, arranged an extended leave and set off for The Round House. 

If Jo was there, and hiding from him, at least he would know she was safe. 

If she wasn’t ... then where was she? 

—


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Many apologies, I realise I had been updating this on Lime Green musing but missed some on here. Am updating a couple of chapters at a time this time, so will match back up

Madge put down the phone. She hadn’t been worried to start with about Joey, used to time without communication, especially with all the media coverage, as she knew Joey’s phone had been tapped before. 

So she had assumed Jo would be in contact when she could, and not worried. Now she became more and more so as she picked up on Phil’s concern. Still she was too concerned about Phil”s mental health, and didn’t really know him well enough to be sure what was best to do. 

This was why she downplayed his concerns, even while she was determined to do some searching herself.

She pondered where to start. It was clear that no one on the Platz knew where she was, and while Joey had many friends, she had become more and more private as time went on. 

Madge realised that she really didn’t know any more who her sister might be close to. She didn’t want to ring the wrong person and set the press onto Joey if she was trying to hide. Equally she was getting more and more worried about her little sister as she realised just how long she seemed to have been missing. 

Finally she decided she would have to start somewhere, so tried Corney Flower, Evadne Lannis and Joey’s agent, being very careful not to show too much of her concern. None of them knew any more than herself, and Madge was stuck. 

Where had she gone?

By the time Phil arrived, Madge and Jem were getting really worried. No one seemed to have any idea where Joey was. 

Phil had been preparing himself for Joey hiding from him, and struggling with feeling he was overreacting or allowing his demons to overtake him. He felt more confused than he had for years, and didn’t trust his own judgement.

However as soon as it turned out Joey really might be lost his mind cleared and he insisted that they had to finally give up private enquiries and contact the authorities.

This wasn’t as dramatic a move forward as they had hoped. The police promised to look into things, but because she had technically gone missing in another country, was an actress they felt there was little hope they could do much. Phil also detected a certain attitude from the investigating officers. With a sinking heart he realised that Joey’s deep cover during the war was probably influencing them. He knew there were people who assumed she was a Nazi sympathiser that had escaped, for it resurfaced whenever there were big stories. Joey refused to answer many queries about her war work, she considered the oath she swore for the Official Secrets Act too important to even hint. In Switzerland or America this wasn’t as much of an issue, even if the stories surfaced, more people understood that there were mixed loyalties and didn’t judge things as harshly. In England, still battered by the war and slowly rebuilding, it seemed more black and white. Sadly there would always be some people who believed the tales. 

As they realised that they couldn’t keep this a secret any more, the family and Phil decided this was too serious to wait for an unwilling police department or international responsibility disputes. Madge contacted Joey’s agent and press officer and they moved swiftly to get the story to the right people. 

The journalists quickly grabbed hold of the story, and while Madge, Jem and Phil hated seeing the headlines, it did bring the search a little further forward. 

The press had not managed to catch Joey at the hotel but the story of her being there resurfaced. The dismissed secretary had a few more minutes of fame saying that she had been sent on ahead, and making sensational suggestions as to what had happened to her former employer.

The hotel lead didn’t help much, but it did suggest she was in the country. Some of Joey’s superiors became aware of her being missing, and finally the police investigating had no excuse not to take this more seriously. 

Search parties were made up in the area, the car rental company came forth and explained that she hadn’t returned the car, but since it was an open ended lease they hadn’t thought anything of it. 

Chalet School girls from the Austrian days arrived, Corney and Evvy particularly making it their mission to coordinate the volunteers. Although many of the younger Chalet Girls didn’t know Joey that well, they knew and loved Madge as their headmistress and founder, and would do anything for ‘Madame’ 

Soon all over the country people were trying to find any news. Still, the days ticked by and there were no answers. 

Where on earth had Joey gone?


	32. Chapter 32

Joey stirred, and opened her eyes. Tree branches waved above her, and she squinted at the light.   
She was cold, and uncomfortable. Her head ached, and she felt totally confused. 

The last thing she remembered was driving the car. Why wasn’t she in the car?

She tried to move and let out a groan. Every muscle hurt, and she blanked out for a moment. Although in fact, while she thought it was only minutes, as her brain cleared the darkening sky told her it must have been longer. 

Her mind whirled. This was not good. She needed to get to shelter at least. 

She could feel the damp ground below her as she moved, and knew that she would only get colder as the night went on. She gritted her teeth, pushed her self onto one side, and then gradually onto her knees and up to a sitting position. Her head whirled, and she blacked out again. Thankfully this time it really was only for a moment. 

She sat with her eyes closed for a while, checking over her body and finding nothing obviously broken, just many scrapes and an overall feeling of weariness. Finally she felt stable enough to open them and look around her. 

As the sun was setting, she caught a glimpse of a sharp flash of light. A twist of her head showed her that it was a mirror. The car was not so far away, although she could tell it was in no state to be driven. It was facing down the steep hillside, jammed between two trees. 

Great dents and scrapes covered every part of it, and the path of destruction behind it told her the tale even before she remembered it properly. 

————-

It had been the day before - or at least she assumed so, not really knowing how long she had been knocked out. 

But it must have been at least that long, for she remembered a previous sunset, and a cold frightened night in the car before the accident. 

Her ordeal on the winding cliff road and hope for a way out had ended abruptly. She suddenly found the way blocked by a rudimentary fence. Beyond, the road disappeared abruptly, and it was clear that the route was no longer passable

Her heart sunk as she saw the cliff collapse. The road had clearly been abandoned some time ago. There was little space to turn, and no way forward. Her only option was to go back the way she had come. 

It had been clear to her that she could not risk turning or trying to repeat her journey down the cliff path again that night, for already the light levels were poor. Driving in the alps meant she understood how dangerous a narrow road in the dark would be, especially in her overtired state

A stab of pain went through her palm. Joey realised she had been gripping the steering wheel so tightly that she now struggled to loosen her hand once she had stopped. 

A quick scout around had shown her that there was no way forward by footpath either, even if she abandoned the car. Finally giving up she had swiftly returned, curled herself up under some car blankets, resigned to a chilly night under the stars. 

Unsurprisingly, she hadn’t slept much, and woke stiff and cold, with muscles screaming at her. 

Although, as Joey remembered this, she almost smiled. She hadn’t known just how loudly her muscles could shout to get her attention, that ache from a poor sleep seemed very minor now, as she sat waitimg as waves of pain passed through her and tried to stay awake long enough to assess her situation.

How the car had come off the road, she wasn’t sure. She remembered a very nerve racking backing down to a slightly wider part of road, and then a slow, torturous 107 point turn, getting out every few moves to check. The space was only just wide enough. She had been tempted by it on the way up, but with the hope of a way out moving forward, the risk had not seemed worth it.

Joey had been proud of herself as she very gradually managed to get her car facing back down the cliffside. She remembered setting off back the way she had come, so the accident couldn’t have happened then. In fact she had driven many hours, slowly inching down the track back the way she had come. 

She had oscillated between feeling glad and determined, then tearful and defeated. 

One side was that at least she knew this time the road would end, there would be civilisation at the end of it, since she had already travelled this way. However she had strained her nerves to almost breaking point on the way up, and now she added the tension of staying within the narrow sides of the road to knowing that she had many hours before she would be safe enough to relax. 

Current day Joey drifted for a bit while she tried to remember what had happened, then realised with a start that it was nearly dark.

She needed to see what her options were for shelter, for she knew her body and mind well enough to know that neither would function right now if she tried to make her way through the woods. 

She gritted her teeth and pushed herself up, wobbled for a bit, then made her way over to the car. It’s bonnet and all along one side were crushed in, but it still had a roof and all it’s windows, although a couple of the doors were unlikely to ever open again. 

Joey held on to the car and waited while her mind swam. She rested her forehead against the cool metal, and tried to ignore the way the world was still whirling around her. The car was cool, and she didn’t smell fuel or see any signs of danger. She worked around behind it and pushed it hard, but the wheels were jammed in to a scrape of mud piled up as it had clearly careened down the hillside. The trees that had finally stopped it’s passage seemed solid and Joey decided she would just have to trust and hope that it had finished it’s trip downwards, and so being inside the car was safe enough. 

She got into the back, and rested for a moment, staring up at the roof, trying to fight a general queasiness. She can’t have eaten much for the past couple of days now, longer possibly. So she didn’t want to be throwing up what little she had in her stomach. 

She must have drifted off, for it was fully black when she woke. She let herself get used to the darkness, and then rummaged around, remembering piling some gifts for the family in when she first picked up the rental car. 

She could have cried when she opened a small hamper intended for Madge and found a bottle of lemonade and one of ginger beer. She knew from her guide training that fluid was vital for survival, and had been dreading having to start trying to find a way to safety tomorrow without anything. 

She took small sips, and her head cleared a little, though still ached badly. She felt as if someone had taken her and shaken her from side to side like a child’s toy. 

She couldn’t sleep much, and so she rested and watched as the darkness began to lighten and birds started to sing around her. As she waited, the final part of the puzzle came to her.


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kudos !

She had been concentrating on not getting close to the edge of the seaward side of the road, for the cliff had gone straight down, and she knew there was danger that side. However she had become a bit more careless as the road looped back inland, and didn’t pay attention to the looseness of the soil on the other side. 

It had all happened in a moment. She had seen the road heading back towards the sea and cliff again, and had tensed, moved the wheel as if she was back on the cliff road, where scratches along one side were far safer than the alternative. 

Just before the cliff road, while still in the woods, her tyres had disturbed a loose collection of earth and she had been unable to do anything as the car slipped off the road and down into a narrow valley. The car went crashing through smaller trees and bushes, and finally landing at these two much more solid barriers. 

Joey would never know how she had ended up away from the car. She may have been thrown, or may have tried to leave the car, knowing a crash risk came often from fire after the damage, and trying to get herself away. It didn’t really seem to matter much, although it frustrated her that she couldn’t seem to access that memory. 

All she really needed to know however was that she was cold, had scrapes that could turn nasty if not dealt with soon, and needed to get to safety. 

As soon as it was light enough, she checked what supplies she had, wrapped herself in the blanket as a makeshift shawl and set off towards the sound of a stream or river. She was far too far down the hill to try to return to the road, and just had to hope and trust that a waterway might have a path beside it or people nearby. 

She was starting the unmistakable signs of a fever, and as she walked she kept mistaking trees for people. Her frazzled mind tended towards storytelling in times of stress, and she started to imagine the people dressed in armour or clothes from other centuries, and that she had an army around her Marching, marching marching, would the trek ever end?

Finally, she reached the waterway, and almost cried in relief to see a path, although not that well trodden in recent years, from the looks of it. 

She sat down suddenly, having been able to force herself to march this far, she just couldn’t go any further for a bit. Despite herself, knowing the danger she was still in, Joey sat down and rested against a tree. Just a little doze, and then she would carry on. 

Just a little doze...


	34. Chapter 34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A tiny semi cameo here and a tiny bit of previous update for an author if you recognise some of the references. Just a little indulgence really as it was watching a film I love that an idea of who might rescue her came to me.

Joey was lucky. Another night outside without proper care and she would have had little chance of waking. Her health had never been that strong, despite great care, so the strain both physical and mental of this ordeal were just too much. 

She was told later that some children out fishing had found her, and somehow brought her to this place of safety. She kept drifting in and out of consciousness, and heard only snippets of conversations. 

“She’s on the bed...oi, watch it!”  
“Hear, watch it, she nearly ended up underwater then!”  
“Shut up Carrie, she were no where near” 

Joey had a moment of wandering back down memory lane, thinking about how Madge would have hated to hear English being mangled this way. Then she had drifted back off into dreams. 

She woke on and off for the next few days, but never for long. Reality and dreams merged, and she spent one relaxing evening watching little people wander all over the beams of the room she was in, apparently carrying little household objects around. 

The voices of the children merged with an occasional deep male voice, and a female one who seemed to be the one she heard more often. 

Finally, one evening she woke up properly, started to move and groaned. Immediately the woman was there and reassuring her, then calling to her husband. 

“She’s awake!” 

Joey blinked and focused properly on the couple. 

“Take it gently my dear” said the man, “you have been very ill.” 

They helped her to sit up, and offered her a drink and some food, although only a small bowl of soup. 

“Better to take it slowly until you have had a chance to recover a little more.” 

She accepted the wisdom of this, for the soup became hard to swallow after a few more mouthfuls. 

“We will get the doctor back for you in the morning, dear. He said you were best not to be moved for now, but he can get help to get you to a hospital tomorrow.” The man said, while his wife, who introduced herself as Mrs Brown, rearranged Joey’s pillows and encouraged her to lie back down. 

As they left the room, she heard their conversation, although the mists of tiredness were beginning to surround her again. 

“He’s a fool that doctor, far too young and inexperienced. He doesn’t know what he is talking about. I miss Dr Makoides!”

“Yes my dear, I quite agree.”

“He barely looked at her, I told you he probably just decided she was a vagrant and to let nature take it’s course.”

“I suspect you are right my dear” 

“She should have been taken to the hospital days ago” 

“I know Egglantine, but we could hardly do anything without the proper help to get her out. And she has done well here with you working your magic. If I’m honest I”d rather be in your hands myself. Don’t worry I’m sure she will be fine”

“Humpf. Don’t you start on that line Emmilius Brown, it’s bad enough that the locals all think I am a witch!”

Joey drifted into unconsciousness again, and woke only as she was moved to a stretcher, and had a momentary feeling as though she was flying. Flying on a bed, she thought, that’s a funny way to travel. Comfy though...” 

Her hosts said goodbye, and she saw the children for the first time. An elder boy and girl, with a much smaller boy, stroking a white rabbit. 

“Goodbye miss, hope you feel well soon” 

“Travel safe miss”

“Look at her, bobbing along on that stretcher. Would make me seasick that would!” 

Joey smiled and tried to wave, but she ached all over, and all she could do was repeat the details of her rescuers to herself, determined not to forget them. She did more than that in the end, for she later wove them and some of her dreams into tales that caught the imagination of a further generation of children.


	35. Chapter 35

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i hadn’t realised until I went to post this that we are now at a possible end. I think this is quite a nice place to leave this, although I know there are many more things I could put Joey through, I think she is due for at least a break from me torturing her! Thank you for comments and reading!

Joey realised later on just how remote a place she had reached, for it took half a day to get her from her host’s cottage to a road big enough for an ambulance. 

She drifted in and out of consciousness during the long road journey till she reached a hospital big enough to be able to help her. She was told later that she went first to a smaller one, but they didn’t dare to try to do more than feed her and make sure she didn’t get dehydrated. 

Thankfully, once she was in a larger hospital it took a very short time for the staff to realise who she was, for Phil had been tireless in making sure that the story was as widespread as possible. 

As soon as they had identified her, Madge, Jem and Phil sped to her side, and she was swiftly transferred to Jem’s care, for it was too complicated for Phil to take her on, given that his current work was out of the country. 

Jem had known Jo from a young age, but this was the first time he was seriously worried about her. Slowly but surely however she found her way back to a more stable physical and mental state and was able to explain what had happened. 

Phil had nearly broken down himself when he finally realised it was bad luck and an accident. No one really knew what had happened, and he had tormented himself with the idea that she had deliberately jumped off a cliff due to him saying her would marry Nancy. 

Joey would have teased him mercilessly for this melodrama in the past, but having lost big stretches of time and been helpless to even tell her rescuers who she was, she had seen a tiny part of the damage his war experiences had done to Phil. So she understood and simply made sure he knew that she had never intended any of this to happen. 

Despite her own many adventures, she had mainly been quite lucky, had managed to escape with little more than scrapes or a few bad dreams. Now she had an added depth, an understanding of how lucky she was to be alive, and she didn’t want to waste any more time on ego or misunderstandings. 

As Jem saw how much Phil cared, and realised how good a doctor he was, and how good for Joey, he discharged Jo into Phil’s care, and retreated, as did Madge, feeling that this time healing together would do the pair of them good. 

Joey recovered physically in her usual wholesale manner, but to took a long time to get rid of the mental effects of her ordeal. 

She couldn’t gather her thoughts well enough to discuss it for some time, but felt somehow a need to apologise to Phil for all the times she thought she had understood but really hadn’t. 

He had fought through so much, and yet she had seen herself as the strong part of their relationship, as he was such a gentle quiet man. Now she understood the strength he had to have got through his ordeals. He had clearly been determined to find her, and he was the one caring for her. He felt like such a solid lump of comfort. There just didn’t seem to be good enough words to explain it all. So she just held his hand, and made it clear she didn’t want him to leave, that he was where he was supposed to be. 

When at last she was well enough to travel further, they returned to the Platz, in a slow journey, with one small detour.

In a small private ceremony, with Madge and Jem as witnesses, and without any fanfare for the press to pick up upon, she quietly became Mrs Joey Graves. 

— — — 

Her publicist managed to work wonders for once, and paid off any journalists tempted to try to follow up on the story about this Dr Graves apparently jilting Nancy Wilmot. It was a tiny part story after all of the drama over her going missing and recovery, and much as the journalists would have wanted more drama, the public mood was on Joey’s side. 

The rumours were that the star Joey Wilson had been driven to this accident by being chased by the journalists, and her fans were not happy. A few words from Joey’s defence contacts, ashamed at the fact that they had lost track of an agent so badly, gave another reason for the papers to move on. 

On their way home, they talked properly, realised all of their confusions and misunderstandings. Somehow after nearly losing each other, it all seemed a lot less important. 

One day the girls would maybe find out the secret of Con’s situation, but they had good family and friends, and somehow they felt it would all work out. It was really Rosalie and Jack’s decision when and how to tell the Triplets, and Joey and Phil realised that they could trust their friends to make the right choice. Other than not talking carelessly about it, they didn’t have to do anything. The people who knew their secret were all close to them, and could all be trusted. Revelations we not needed, and and discussions could wait. 

Finally, as they turned onto the driveway in front of her... no their... Chalet, Joey felt a sense of calm, of home. 

She would probably have many more adventures, but for now, she was just happy to be safe, well on the way to recovery, and back on the Platz, with her friends and with Phil.

Hilary and Nancy, who had felt terrible for not realising that she was missing, then thrilled that Joey and Phil had finally seen sense and made a commitment to each other, were the first to greet them. They had made sure that Joey’s part of the Chalet was ready and welcoming and helped carry the luggage inside chattering happily asking about the wedding and their journey. 

“How does it feel then, to be Mrs Doctor Graves?” Hilary teased, “Does it feel any different?”

Nancy grinned. 

“Yes, it’s very conventional of you, a doctor’s wife! Will you start becoming obsessed with cake sales and sock darning?” 

The object of her teasing smiled. That really didn’t sound likely for the famous Joey Wilson. But somehow, after all her recent adventures, the idea of settling down to be a doctor’s wife, helping with school sales and the day to day activities of the Platz sounded very attractive. 

Maybe... just maybe, after a lot more time making sure they were ok, perhaps having a child or even a few that she and Phil could keep, could raise themselves? Joey had never really felt that drive before, but somehow it seemed a lot more possible, even appealing. 

Even if they didn’t have any of their own, there were many of the family’s next generation now at the school, and children of her friends coming along. Perhaps she could be a friend, a mentor to them, especially the triplets of course. 

Joey contemplated some witty reply to Nancy, but the emotion of being there, feeling safe and at home nearly overwhelmed her. So she just shrugged and smiled. 

Phil came up to her after Nancy and Hilary had left, and put his arms around her, both looking out of the windows at the beautiful mountains around them. 

“Do you think you could get used to it?” Phil asked. “Being a doctor’s wife and taking things a bit easier for a while?” 

Joey leant into him, and felt a sense of peace, for the first time in a long while. 

“I think it will be a great adventure” she said, with a contented smile. 

The End. Thank you for reading over so many years and apologies for leaving it on cliffs for so long!


End file.
